Ancient Portal
by danners3
Summary: John wakes up with a hot earth sun burning down on him, sand underneath him and little memory as to how he got there. His last memory is of embarking on a mission in the Pegasus Galaxy. How did he arrive back on earth, fifty years earlier?
1. Chapter 1 Which Beach?

CHAPTER ONE – WHICH BEACH?

His eyes cracked open. Salt tinged his lips and his skin and he felt the heat of the sun scorch his face. Shut his eyes again to keep out the painful light. Opened his mind to try and recall where the hell he was. No clues. Nothing. Nada.

Groaning now, he rolled over and was rewarded with a faceful of sand. Hot sand, and promptly spat it out. Experimentally he pushed his hands against the sand, attempting to push his body upright, the hot sun now at his back and not burning relentlessly on his face. A small amount of success and he was at least on all fours now, the dizziness that had pushed him down to the sand, threatening to overwhelm him again.

_Crap Sheppard... just what the hell have you gotten yourself into this time...?_

It took a good ten minutes, at least by his somewhat ineffectual calculations, to get to a standing position and it was not fully upright. He had to bend slightly, resting his hands on his knees and keep his head slightly lowered. The feel on the sun on his face, against his head was pounding and relentless and he wanted nothing more right now than to throw up, hell – curl up and die.

_Think Sheppard... where are you? What is the last thing you remember...?_

Can one's brain hurt? John didn't actually think so, although it seemed to be the case right now. He struggled to recall the last lucid moment he had had. And groaned again. It hovered, just on the edge of his conciousness and he used every bit of mental strength he had to bring it forward into the light.

_The stargate... I stepped through the stargate. With Ronon and Teyla. Rodney? Yes, Rodney too. Routine mission... energy spikes found on P8T198, Rodney wanted to check it out. We stepped through the stargate... damn... what happened after we stepped through the stargate...?_

He took some experimentally deep breaths, pushing down the nausea and the dizziness and was now able to fully stand and take some account of his surroundings and any injuries he might be harbouring.

_I stepped through the stargate with my team...so where are they? Why am I the only one here? And this is not the planet we stepped through to. This is not P8T198. It was cold... wide open plains, rocky, and cold... so cold. What the hell? _

He was standing on a beach, white sand shifting off into the distance, unbroken by buildings, humans, or anything as far as he could tell. Just white sand. The beach looked like any other beach found on earth, eerily so and if he shut his eyes he could imagine that he was on a deserted island, surfboard tucked comfortably under his arm and with the smell of the salty sea air, could visualise the rolling blue breakers that launched themselves smoothly toward shore, waiting for him to ride out and tame them. Palm trees waving in the island breeze, hot sun burning down, coconut oil and smooth skin...

_I can't be back on earth. I stepped through the damn stargate. This must be a dream.. that's it! I'm dreaming... I got bored waiting for Rodney to do his thing, went back to the gate and took a nap... and now here I am. Got sick of the damn cold on that planet, so conjured up something much more pleasant... except... why do I feel like crap? Like I just got the crap beat out of me? What the hell is going on?_

"Do you need assistance.? Do you want me to get you to a hospital?" The voice came from off to his left, where the white sand was broken only by the line of palm trees. He turned his head sharply and cursed softly. Not a good idea. He had been in the sun for too long, and this perhaps explained the dizziness and feeling of general nausea.

"Who are you and where the hell am I?" Tact was not always a factor present in Colonel John Sheppard, particularly when offworld on alien planets. He tended to forget that while those that knew him well, were perhaps a little more... lenient towards his somewhat irreverent attitude to things, people that did not know him were a little taken back and sometimes upset when spoken to as though they were immediately assumed to be the enemy. Which, in most cases with Colonel John Sheppard, they were.

"Perhaps if you were a little more polite I would be more inclined to give you an immediate answer. Your attitude and your manners certainly leave little to be desired. I did not mean to startle you, simply wished to find out whether you needed assistance. If you don't require my help, just say so, and I will leave."

_Damn, she sounds like some prissy school marm type. Can't you keep your mouth shut Sheppard, if you've got nothing good to say? Gets you in trouble every time, that mouth of yours. Play nice with the lady, and maybe she'll tell you what you want to know and help you get out of here!_

"Please, I'm sorry if I seemed rude. I have no idea where I am at the moment. I came through the gate with my team, and the planet we dialled into was certainly not this one. It was cold, and lots of rocks... lots of rocks. Nothing like this. I don't know how I got from there to here." He found himself moving towards where he had heard her voice, waiting until she spoke again. When she did, her voice was surprised and more than just a little curious.

"You speak differently. Are you of sound mind? You speak of gates and planets as though you are delusional. I will take you to the hospital. They will be able to assist you." He heard also, a little fear in her voice and confusion began to spread in his own mind.

"Please, can you tell me where I am. Perhaps I have had some sort of accident and am suffering from memory loss. I just need to know where I am..." Something wasn't right here... she sounded genuinely confused as to the way he was speaking, and while that in itself was not altogether unusual with some of the different cultures they had come in contact with here in the Pegasus galaxy, this one seemed different, not different alien, but more like his own world. And something dark and a little wrong crept up his spine.

"I'm on earth, aren't I. There is no stargate here, is there? And you no doubt think I have lost my mind... damn, and I'm not surprised. I might just have done..." John ran a hand somewhat roughly through his dark spikey hair, causing it to stand up in disarray, then ran his hand down his cheeks feeling the rough stubble that grew there. Glancing down at his clothes, he saw that he was indeed in the base BDU's he had left with earlier that day, and was still outfitted in the tactical vest. His hand involuntarily reached up to where his weapon, his beloved P90 would normally be secured and he groaned when he found it was no longer there.

"I think perhaps you have a touch of sunstroke. It is very hot today, and it would appear that you have been lying out in it for some time before I discovered you." She stepped out of the bushes now at the same time as he heard a sound that he had not heard for some time. The barking of a small dog and squinting against the bright sunlight, he saw a small white terrier running along the sand and saw also, that it carried a ball, obviously bringing it back to his mistress. The woman who was just stepping out of the bushes and into the sand.

He stared. Hell, he couldn't help it. She was stunning and brought to mind the big screen goddesses of long ago, curvy figure in full swimsuit, no bikini for this woman. Her dark wavy hair was cut shoulder length and curled atractively in long waves, framing a lovely face with high slightly rounded cheekbones above which sat inquisitive blue eyes. Perhaps he did have a touch of sunstroke, because to him she looked like one of those lovely beach girls from the 1960's, when figures were meant to be touched and admired, not stick thin and unattractively bony. He moved towards her, mindful of the small dog who had now reached him and sniffed at his feet, dropping the ball hopefully.

Putting his hand out he attempted a smile, and find that it didn't make his headache any worse. "I'm Colonel John Sheppard, and just for the record, I don't think I'm crazy. Something happened between where I left from this morning and where I've gotten to now. And I need to figure out what that is..."

She took his hand, hers felt soft and tiny in his. He squeezed gently then released it, looking down into those crystalline blue eyes that stared back at him unblinkingly.

"I am Gina – and as to what happened to you? Perhaps if we were to take some shade and get you a cold drink, your head would allow the memories to come back of their own accord. I see by your clothes and your title that you are military, so perhaps you have come from the base on the other island. There is both an airforce and a naval base there. Maybe you have been involved in some sort of manoevers and something went wrong?"

_Nail on the head sweetheart. Something went terribly wrong. Naval and airforce base on another island. This place is familiar .. somehow. I know I've been here before, but it is slightly different. If I didn't know better, I would think I was in Hawaii... but perhaps, not today's Hawaii. And this rather stunning woman in front of me? That hairstyle and that figure...not to mention the swimsuit. Certainly not what you'd find on earth today. Aah Rodney. I need you my friend. Seems like I managed to open another portal... one that led back to earth, but back in time. Aaah crap...!_


	2. Chapter 2 Questions But No Answers

CHAPTER 2 QUESTIONS BUT NO ANSWERS

"I think, Colonel John Sheppard, that we should get you out of the sun and get you something cold to drink. Normally I would not allow strangers into my house, especially ones who appeared disorientated and a little unstable, but you are attired in military uniform, and fortunately, you have chosen to come across the daughter of General, so I feel an obligation to ensure you are safe. My father would not be happy if I chose to simply ignore your situation."

She smiled at him now, and turned to head back through the foliage from where she had come, tossing a look over her shoulder to make sure that he was following. The dog had picked up his ball and ran on ahead, obviously knowing the direction in which they were heading. He took his first steps, then faltered as the pounding headache threatened to take over the few remaining senses that did not appear incapacitated. Her smiled dropped and she moved quickly back to him, bringing her small body to his side and slipping her shoulder comfortably under his arm so that he could rest of her.

"If my cottage was not the closest, I would certainly get you to the hospital first, but I don't imagine I have the strength to get you that far on my own. Come on Colonel Sheppard, it's not too far. We shall take it slowly, and soon we will be out of this heat and into the shade. Perhaps movement will be easier for you then."

He grunted once, both with pain and as a response to her comment but did allow himself to lean slightly on her. She was stronger than she looked and took part of his weight easily and the smell of coconuts drifted up into his nose and some sort of other tropical fruity smell, and he turned his head slightly so that his nose briefly brushed across her hair. _Yep! Coconuts, pineapple... pina colada... Hawaii? Just what the hell is going on here Sheppard?_

She moved easily through the palm trees, which thickened to heavily foliage with a small trail that ran through it from the beach. It was a very narrow trail and he felt the cool leaves push against his face, a not altogether unpleasant sensation. By the time they got to the small clearing where her cottage stood on it's own, surrounded by a mass of coloured flowers that waved enticingly in the island breeze, his face was bathed in sweat and he had to fight the blackness that kept threatening to overcome him. She paused before they got to the door, looking up into his face, immediate concern for him them.

"We'll get you lying down with a cool cloth on your head Colonel, then I shall phone my father to get him to come."

John's hand moved fast, faster than he thought he would have the energy for given how bad he was feeling.

"Please... don't ring him just yet. Give me a little while to get my bearings, get some of my thoughts in order... please..." He had gripped her wrist tightly to get her attention, and he felt her intake of breath and looking down into her face saw her wince slightly. "I'm sorry... please..." Immediately he lessened his grip but kept his hand circling her wrist, a bit more lightly now, but kept looking into her upturned face to see whether she would respond to him request.

"I won't make any promises Colonel. If you're sick, or here for the wrong reasons..." she deliberately let the word 'spy' hang in the air between them, " then I am certainly doing myself nor my country any favours by keeping my mouth shut. And believe me Colonel, I will not stand by and let anyone bring shame nor dishonour to the country that both my father and my brother have chosen to honour and defend. Do I make myself clear?"

"Perfectly Gina, and I can assure you, this is as much my country as it is yours and while I have sometimes been in the position where I have had to question various orders from the higher ups, I have always held this country in the highest regard and am certainly no traitor. I don't know yet, the reasons for my arrival here in this manner, although I do have some theories that I cannot discuss with you just yet."

He attempted to draw himself up to his fullest height, feeling uneasy that he would be considered anything less that loyal to his country, but given the circumstances of his arrival and the fact that he likely seemed a little 'odd', he could understand why her thoughts would perhaps lead in this direction.

She searched his face, and nodded – obviously finding something there that set her mind at ease. "I can sense that you have realised something about your arrival here, and it does not sit easily with you. I will allow you some recovery time, but I do need to contact my father. If he were to find out that a stranger had arrived on the island and was staying here, it would be a very short time between his despatch from the base and his arrival here... believe me! He treats me as a child still, and perhaps the decision I make to bring you into my home gives weight to his regard of me..."

A small chuckle escaped her as she pushed open the front door and he was able to step into the blessedly cool interior of the cottage. "And it sometimes gives me great pleasure to do something that he does not consider … appropriate. Being a general's daughter? Let us just say that there are easier things in life..."

He managed a grin at that. Having experienced his own share of general's over the years, he could fully understand the pressure that one of their family members would be put under. Constant scrutiny, the need to always be totally above board and reproach, the constant need to follow every rule in the book and the total regimentation of every day life. It would not be an easy existence, especially for a child. Although this young woman was certainly not a child any longer. Her lovely curvaceous body in the swimsuit had felt... pleasant... alarmingly so, as it had been pushed against his side in order to offer him assistance._ Aah Sheppard, just say it damn you. She turned you on. You're on an island you can only assume is on earth in what is likely is a different time zone and rescued by a woman that gets your blood heating. Seriously Sheppard? Can't you keep that damn libido on the shelf for any length of time? A general's daughter to boot. Playing with fire, my friend..._

She took him through to her bedroom which had the shades pulled down to keep out the hot island sun, and eased him down gently on the carefully smoothed covers. They felt blessedly cool and she heard him sigh as his head touched the soft pillow and smiled down at him, bringing a hand up to settle lightly at his forehead.

"Yes – hot and a little feverish. I'll get you a cool cloth and an even cooler drink. Close your eyes for a little while..."

His hand snaked out again to grip her wrist and once again he forgot his own strength and it was too tight. He felt her small bones push together in her wrist and his eyes, which had shut briefly, flew open in silent apology to witness the wince of pain. His features twisted and he forced himself to both relax and to speak. "I'm sorry, again... I'm working with pure reflex at the moment. Please, come back soon."

She didn't reply, just waited until he had released her wrist and using the other one to massage it slightly, she watched as his eyes were drawn to that movement and hastened her departure out of the room. She did not wish to make him feel worse than he already did.

She muttered to herself as she moved into the kitchen to get the cool drink. "You father is not going to be happy Gina.. you know nothing about this man, and bringing him here? Into your home? You should have left him where you found him, or perhaps just pulled him into the shade, then rung dear old dad to come and pick him up. You know what he's going to say when he finds out... _Yeah, but aren't you sick of him telling you what to do? Always looking over your shoulder, questioning every decision you make? You're a grown woman Gina... you've been under his thumb all your life, and now your brother adds his weight to his overbearance. And yet you chose to stay on the island... why? You should have left, found a new life somewhere on your own, out from their constant interfering and domination into your life. You're the fool... and admit it – that man you rescued from the beach... admit it – he makes you tingle just a little...and it's been a long time since you let someone get close to you... like that..._


	3. Chapter 3 The Portal Opens

CHAPTER 3 THE PORTAL OPENS

She had some homemade lemonade cooling in the refrigerator and pouring a glass for both herself and the man who now lay on her bed, she stopped briefly to throw on a light summer dress over the swimsuit she wore, feeling a little exposed. She had noted the way his eyes had travelled up the length of her legs, and while she had acknowledged the slight thrill that this gave her, was also aware that she was alone in the house with a stranger of the opposite sex. Discretion and and little more propriety was definitely in order. She stopped also to run a cloth under the cold water tap, and carefully wringing it out, she carried everything back into her darkened room.

He did not appear to have moved. His eyes were closed and his hand rested lightly across his face as though to shield it from ... something. Either unwanted memories or perhaps the pain that must have been pushing it's way into his head. "Colonel?" she called to him softly, not wanting to startle him and as she moved closer she saw that his hazel eyes were open and looking intently into hers. "I have your drink and a cool cloth. Would you like to sit up a little so that you can drink it?"

She moved to the small bedside table and placing her things down on there, she bent slightly, intending to move his pillows to a higher position once he had managed to sit up. Her eyes flicked to his and she saw that his eyes had dropped lower and she hunched her shoulders forward a little, mindful of the fact that although she had changed to a sundress, it was a low neckline and in his current position, he had a fully supported view of her ample breasts. John dragged his gaze up to meet her cool blue eyes and found himself colouring just a little.

_Jesus John... what is wrong with you? This woman is trying to help you and you have your face almost pushed down her dress like a hormone charged school boy. Your head is pounding hard enough to explode, and you want to reach out and touch those rather delectible breasts... oh boy, you are a sick man!_

The expression that had flittered across his face then must have been an easy read because suddenly she smiled and those cool blue eyes became crystalline blue again and he found himself exhaling in relief. Crisis averted. For now.

"Can you do me another favour Gina? Do you have a newspaper here that I can look at?"

Gina looked at him, reaching for the drink and the cloth, having moved the pillows so that he was now semi reclining rather than lying.

"I will get you a newspaper Colonel, and then you will tell me who you are and what you are doing here. Don't think for a moment that I am a naive school girl. I have spent my life around military bases and know that you are more than what you seem. I suspect you are going to need my help for more than just cold drinks and wet cloths, and if you want that help, then I want answers."

Her firm voice had a surprised glint coming into his eyes and he mentally reestimated her character. No, she did not appear to be a naive schoolgirl. He had seem the steely glint that had come into her eyes, and the derisive glint when she had mentioned that she was from a military family. Likely she had her own crosses to bear and if he wanted her help, and he suspected that he would do, then he would need to trust her. Or trust someone. Because he had a sneaking suspicion what had happened, and he needed a newspaper to confirm it. Memories were starting to return with some clarity and he did not like the pictures that had begun to form in his mind.

He nodded once at her, keeping his eyes now, firmly on hers and keeping away the temptation to drop them lower. She turned and left the room, after handing him the glass of cool lemonade and this time he found himself watching the sway of her hips as she moved from the room. She most definitely had all her curves in the right places.

He heard the rustle of paper and she re entered the room, attempting to fold it back into some sort of order. "Sorry, Colonel. Newspapers and maps. Two of the things that appear to elude me - being able to refold them into their original order." Her derisive smile brought a smile of his own and he caught the glint of humour that brightened the blue of her eyes to a brilliant hue. He chuckled a little as he took it from her, replacing his now empty glass on the cabinet beside the bed, his eye immediately going to the date on the front of the newspaper, and the name of the paper itself. She saw the way his face paled momentarily and a little alarmed now, she sat down on the bed beside him and placed a hand on his arm. He flinched slightly at the contact, the heat of her small hand causing an unsuspecting shiver up his arm and noticing his reaction she went to pull her hand away quickly.

"Leave it there..." he said gruffly. "Human contact right now... I need that."

Her touch gentled and she left her hand there as instructed and her voice when she spoke to him was also gentle. "Tell me Colonel. You look as though your best friend just died and you only found out by reading the obituary. Tell me what's going on..."

"July 4th 1962... today..." John's voice was quiet and she leaned in closer to hear him.

"Independence Day... 1962."

She moved her hand away from his arm now, taking his chin and pulled his face around so that he she could make eye contact with him. "Colonel! What is going on.. yes, it is the fourth of July 1962 and later on, the sky will light up with fireworks and they will be a huge celebration in Honolulu. My father and brother will expect me to join them for a family celebration in Honolulu. I need to tell them something. A strange man appears to have washed up on a beach near my home. His clothes are different. He's not of this island, he speaks differently and he refuses to tell me what is going on. If you don't give me something, I will have to go to them with what little I do know, and the military police will be over here before you can work out just how far it is to swim to the next island. I want to trust you, but you need to give me something."

His hand moved to her arm, slid down to her wrist and gently pulled away the hand that was grasping his chin. He held that hand in his own now, turning it over in his much bigger hand and looking thoughtfully down at her palm, then idly drawing patterns on it. "I can tell you little, Gina without compromising my mission and the fact that what I do is highly classified. You, being around military, would appreciate that - I'm sure. I am airforce, although not from here - US airforce yes, but a different division...a different time..."

"A different time Colonel... you're starting to scare me now..." She looked down in fascination at the patterns he was making on her palm. It seemed to sooth him,however it sent shivers up her arm and she felt the compulsion to pull her hand away from his. But resisted it, knowing that somehow this vague action was giving him the strength to continue his story.

"When I woke up this morning, it was July 4th 2012. And I was not here. I was a very very long way away - doing something extremely top secret for my country, something I am not authorised to discuss with anyone who does not have the relevant security clearance. I need to get back, but firstly, I need to figure out what went wrong. Which is going to be a bitch. Because the one person who could figure this whole piece of crap out is a scientist by the name of Dr Rodney McKay - and he is not here. He is there... if you get my drift. So I need your help. I need to find where I came through - something has opened up, some sort of rift in time, and if you know this island as well as I imagine you do, then you are the one to help me."

He gripped her hand a little tighter now, watching the play of emotions that flitted across her face. She had paled a little, and she attempted to pull her hand away looking at him now as though she doubted his sanity.

"Perhaps the sun Colonel... you need to rest, then perhaps things will be clearer, less confusing."

He didn't let her pull her hand away, kept it firmly in his, needing to establish a connection with her, a tangible one. He would need her to help him, and he needed her firmly on his side at the moment. He may also need the assistance of her family if they were unable to find where he had come through. But first he had to convince her that his brain didn't lie scrambled on the hot sand out there.

"Gina! Look at me!" He kept his voice even and firm and having been brought up around military, she responded easily to the authority she heard. "I know this is a lot to take in,and I know you question my sanity - but look at me! Look at what I am wearing." He let go of her hand now, and began to open pockets in his tactical vest, pulling out various pieces of equipment and gear that he kept in there for field emergencies. "Look at this Gina! Does this sort of equipment look as though it belongs in this time?"

He watched her eyes, watched for the moment of belief, but it still did not come. "Colonel - if you really are a Colonel...?" At her raised eyebrows, he huffed an impatient breath and pointed to the insignia on his shoulder. "That does not prove you come from fifty years in the future... fifty years Colonel? And you wonder at my sceptisism? Yes, I understand that there are many top secret things that go on in the military - hell - my father keeps his cards very close to his chest as does my brother - but you are talking time travel here. A relative theory. Theoretical physics. Neither proven nor disproven but not a reality yet, not by a long shot..."

"Exactly Gina... which is why this should be all the more believable to you..."

She had fallen right into that one, she told herself. Of course, if it didn't exist now, perhaps it did in the future. But this man... did not look as though she imagined a man would look who came from that far into the future. _ But what did you expect Gina? What do we know of the future? Science fiction does not exactly pave the way._

She took a deep breath as though having come to some sort of decision. "You've not just come from the future... there is something else you're not telling me, and that is the bigger story I'll wager. But I'll help you. I will. There's been an ... emptiness... in my life these past few years, personal issues you might say, and here I am handed the mystery of the decade in the form on a strange unexplained man who claims to come from the future... I'd be a fool to walk away without solving the mystery or at least helping to."

She laid both hands on his chest now and pushed gently, then removed the paper from his hands. "Rest Colonel John Sheppard. Get a little sleep, then you can have some food and a shower. I have to meet my family at the mainland this afternoon - do you wish to accompany me? Perhaps experience independence day fifty years in the past? We can think of a cover story to get my father off your case, then tomorrow, we'll begin to unravel your little mystery and find a way to get you back...hmmm?"

She willed him to say yes. She felt an odd stirring being this near to him and wasn't ready to give that up yet, in fact a tiny naughty part of her wished to explore it further. Her past, while just that, was always a heartbeat away - she had been hurt, badly by the last man she had trusted - a man her own father had trusted and encouraged her to become involved with. He had been wrong and she had come out with more than just mental aches and sprains - they had been physical. And when her father had discovered this his anger was almost brutal and the man, a junior officer in the airforce under the command of her father had been stripped of his rank and hauled up on charges. He had forced her to testify against him, to show to the world the bruises he had left on her and the humiliation had been complete. It had taken her a long time to forgive her father for that or her brother who had also stood beside her father against her.

He looked into her eyes, saw some of what she was thinking flit across her face, saw the hurt and knew also that something bad had happened in her past and that she did not trust easily._ Fifty years too late sweetheart and a galaxy away... _

His eyes flickered shut now, needing the rest and he drifted almost immediately into sleep. She stood over him for a long while looking down at the dark lashes that rested softly on the tanned cheeks and her hand reached forward to brush a strand of unruly hair back from his forehead. He did not stir and she left him then, content to go about her business while he slept.

Sleep was not easy. He went down hard and was suddenly back on the planet with the rest of his team. He saw through his own eyes, the rest of his team in front of him, already fanning out to look around the immediate vicinity of the gate. He himself, hung back just a little, waiting for the event horizon to shut down and needing to listen for any sounds that should not have been there. He registered the cold. It was intense really and while there was no snow or ice on the ground, the air was bitter and penetrated the base uniforms they wore, along with the woollen fingerless gloves. The MALP had sent through basic data so they had known to expect the cold and his additional concession to this was a black woollen beanie that was pulled down low over his forehead, almost to his eyes. He brought his P90 up automatically, scanning the area for life signs that the MALP had not detected, but could still be there in hiding, ready to make themselves known now that humans had arrived.

"Teyla, Ronon? Can you take point on his one? I want to take the six"

"You sense something Sheppard?" Ronon's glance back at their commanding officer was hooded. John's spidey senses were somewhat legendary and when he said that he was picking something up on those uncanny radars of his, the rest of the team, hell, the rest of Atlantis, generally took heed. They were rarely wrong.

"Not sure Ronon. It's a little creepy here. I know the MALP picked up no life signs, but I get the wierd feeling that there is something here. Can you hear a buzzing?" He shook his head a little, as though the buzzing was actually a figment of his imagination and was in fact coming from inside his head. Rodney, walking just in front of him gave him a quizzical look.

"You ok Sheppard? You look a little... off..."

"Off Rodney? Off from what? Turned off, switched off, put off? Just what the hell do you mean...? Off?"

"Well I guess the smart mouth is the same, so I must have been imagining it, whatever 'it' was... forget it." Rodney huffed an impatient breath, annoyed by John's usual reaction to some of his comments.

John continued to get that niggly feeling that spread tendrils of an unknown energy down his spine and the buzzing got louder. The rest of the team had moved on ahead, still in a large clearing that the stargate was situated in the middle of. In all directions around them, there appeared to be rock, rock and more rock. Big rocks, little rocks, middle sized rocks, rocks everywhere. Just not really an interesting planet and with all these additional internal readings going on, John was keen to get the hell out of dodge. As soon as they could.

"Let's get this done quickly people. Not liking this planet. Not at all."

"Baby", muttered McKay and this comment, barely heard, earned him a kick from John as he jogged slightly to catch up with him.

"Hey!" protested Rodney.

"Just do your job Rodney so we can get out of here." Rodney wisely kept his comments to himself and moved a little faster to catch up with Ronon and Teyla and remove himself from the range of Sheppard's rather unforgiving boot.

The came up to a larger rock structure and Rodney's excitement began to grow. He had his hand held device in front of him and was busy tracking the energy spikes he had been receiving since they arrived and the same one's that had brought them to this planet in the first place. John, bored - wandered off, as he often did when the scientists started doing their thing. It was just... uninteresting. _Face it, you've seen one rock, you've seen them all_.

He moved away from the others towards an unusual structure that appeared to have been created more or less naturally by nature, or whatever it was called on this particular planet, but when he arrived in front of it, he debated whether it was in fact nature created or perhaps man, or something else made. Some of the surfaces were smooth and almost polished and he felt that energy pulsing that amplified the buzzing in his ear and he began to feel nauseous, so much so that he almost retched then and there and had to fight to stop himself dropping to his knees. The pain in his head grew with the buzzing and he tried to call out to the others, but he was unable to make any sort of sound. The stones started to glow and he was transfixed. The colour was a brilliant purple and it was mesmerising making him forget the pain in his head and the feeling of needing to vomit. HIs hand reached out to touch the brilliant purple - there was a flash of light and blinding pain... and then, sand, hot sun and nothing...


	4. Chapter 4 The Truth

CHAPTER 4 THE TRUTH

He fell out of sleep as abruptly as he had fallen in. Hard and fast. And just as painful. He cried out and Gina was beside him in seconds, placing her hands onto his chest to quieten him and in his disorientation, he grabbed her wrists to pull her away, again exherting more strength than was necessary. It was her cry that woke him fully and he sat up, his hands still holding her wrists and this time he pulled on them gently, bringing her closer to him so that she had to sit down on the bed beside him.

"God, I'm so sorry Gina. I saw what happened, saw how I got here... crap... it's worse than I thought... you have no idea!"

Once again she seemed unable to pull her hands away from his. "Then tell me Colonel. You need to tell me more. It is unfair to expect me to put up with _this.." _She gave her hands a tug now to free them and held them out in front of her to show the reddened marks that were forming. "... when you won't tell me anything. I'm a forgiving sort of person Colonel, in fact I've put up with more than you can possibly know, but I'll not be taken advantage of. So tell me – now, or I'll be forced to make a phone call that you don't want me to make yet!"

Her voice was sharp and he dragged his eyes away from her wrists, then sat up properly to swing his legs over the bed, groaning just a little. Her eyes softened when she saw the pain he was still in and relented a little.

"Come and get something to eat Colonel. You can tell me over some food. I've made some sandwiches for lunch and organised some food for the picnic I'm expected to attend later today. You'll tell me once you've eaten."

She stood back and allowed him to stand, but stayed close enough in case he became dizzy again. The nap had done him some good and he stayed steady on his feet and she turned and moved into the kitchen, content to know that he could follow her unaided.

"Sit Colonel and eat. I'll get you another drink." He stood behind one of the chairs and looked down at the small kitchen table that held a plate laden with sandwiches and seeing his hesitation, she placed a hand at his waist and gave him an encouraging squeeze. "It's ok Colonel. I'm not attempting to poison the truth out of you, although I have to admit that the idea intrigues me just a little..."

He smiled a little at that, and sat down, but waited for her to join him before he took a sandwich. Once he began eating, his appetite returned in full force and it was several sandwiches later that he noticed the amused look on her face. "Fifty years and no eating Colonel, seems to me you have a lot of making up to do... and you've started well!"

"John... call me John. And yes, guess I was starting to get a little hungry... that was good – thank you." He sat back in his seat now and regarded her with his hazel green eyes, clear and slightly disconcerting. "You want the truth Gina? Classified or not, I will give you the abridged version and it's likely you'll believe little of it. Science fiction? Hell yes, to most that is what it will seem. But I'm living it, I need to get back to it... somehow."

Abruptly he pushed his chair back and stood and started pacing restlessly around the room. "In seven years man will walk on the moon – fact. I know this. In fifty years man will travel from one galaxy to another, via a stargate, a device that allows a wormhole to connect from one portal to another. In the blink of an eye, man can step through a stargate and be a million light years away. Scared yet Gina? Because you should be. It's very real, and it's happening right now, where and when I come from..."

He paused in his pacing to look at her face, seeing shock yes, and something else. A small smile, a hint of something devilish in those crystalline blue eyes and a nod. "I always knew John... one day, I always knew that there would be more for us. Out there... I wanted to join the airforce, but it is not acceptable for a woman to become a pilot. I wanted to join the space programme, I went to college, I have a degree in physics, again – not acceptable for a woman. But John... I knew...!"

Her eyes shining now, she pushed away from her own seat and came to stand in front of him, looking up into his face. "You've been there? To other worlds? Seen aliens? Travelled through space...? Oh, I so much wish I could belong in your time. For so long... you cannot understand... really." She paused again and whirled around to stand at the window. "You cannot understand. I want more, I always have. I have looked to the skies, and wanted... _so damn much!_ But it is never there, never accessible..."

She turned away from the window, sensing that he had moved in behind her and this action brought her close to him, close enough to smell his very male smell and cause a small whisper of need to circle enticingly through her.

"And you stand here in front of me... with my holy grail. Proof that we make it to the stars, proof that there is more... " Tears stung her eyelids now and his hand came down to brush them away before they fell.

"I'm sorry Gina, I didn't mean to upset you. I thought you would find it impossible to understand, to believe, yet you accept just like that. There is so much I could tell you, but I have to be careful. There are parodoxes involved with time travel. I cannot interfere with anything here in case I cause ripples in time which will affect my present and your future. I must be very careful I don't disturb anything. Do you understand?"

She nodded, feeling his hand still resting against her cheek almost as though he had forgotten it was there.

"This stargate... is it something that the airforce discovers? Perhaps my father already knows of it. He works on many top secret missions."

"Yes, the airforce and a team of scientists discover and develop it, but it is not likely your father knows of it's existence. It was discovered in 1939 and work will not begin on it until 1969. But I didn't come through to your earth through this stargate Gina. I was on another planet with my team and I found another portal, although I did not realise what it was at the time. Obviously, given where I have ended up, it has acted like a time portal, and seems to transport the person or thing back in time to their world, not to the world where it is situated. There is a scientist on my team, a brilliant physicist... if he had come through with me, likely he would have worked it all out by now. But me, not so much... "

His hand slipped down from her cheek and came to rest at her waist. For some reason he felt the need to touch her. To keep her near him. "You've studied physics? Perhaps you can find some logical reasoning for what happened, certainly you can help find the portal this side. It can't be one sided, it needs to have a point of return."

"You are sure of this John?" His hand burned through her thin cotton dress and she was finding it increasingly difficult to breathe.

"No Gina... not sure at all. But I need to believe that or I'm stuck here in a different time line, unless my team can discover what happened to me and find a way to get me back from there. But know this, I'll not sit around and do nothing..."


	5. Chapter 5 Familiarity

CHAPTER 5 FAMILIARITY

He told her a little more, but kept it simple, not wanting to become too involved in long technical explanations that could cause implications at a later stage. He was fascinated by the expressions on her face as he talked to her and smiled a little as she become excited and interjected a little too forcefully, her hands expressive and always moving, his own itching to take her into his arms. _Keep those feelings carefully tucked away Sheppard. She's not for you. Different time, different place – can't happen. Wouldn't be fair on her, and likely not fair on you either. Yeah, might be fun, but the consequences may be far reaching... and can't have that little misdemenour on my conscious._

Eventually he wound down, content now just to watch her. She moved about finding him a towel and some men's clothes that she pulled out of a chest of drawers... not sure how he felt about that! Either she still had a man in her life, or until recently, one had been living here. Whichever one it was, he pushed the thoughts aside. He didn't want to think of her with another man. Possessive? Hell yes, for now he could enjoy the small fantasy that she belonged with him. Reality would intrude soon enough.

"Shower Colonel John Sheppard! As fetching as the rugged male look is, the aroma, not so much..." She smiled to show that she was indeed teasing, and he took the towel and the offered clothes and headed to the bathroom. And fought the urge to whistle.

She bustled around cleaning the kitchen and completing her preparations for the picnic. She would take her motor boat to the mainland, to join her family for the required picnic and family time that was both mandatory and expected on the fourth of July, regardless of how she felt about her father. She had still not fully forgiven him for his role in getting Captain Terrence O'Neill stripped of his rank and thrown in the brig. She had still not forgiven him for stepping in and taking control of a situation that she had wanted to deal with on her own. She had intended to throw the man out – it was a personal injury that he had shown her, and should not have been reflected in his professional life. Arguments with her father had not given her any concessions. He had insisted that the Captain he brought up on charges professionally and had paraded her injuries like a pariah. She had felt more than just ashamed. She had hidden here on her island, in her cottage and had made little progress at getting back into a new life and the real world. This was the legacy Captain O'Neill and her father had left for her.

She stopped for a moment to listen to the sound of the shower and thought she heard whistling. This brought a smile to her face. It had been some time since she had heard a man in the shower... and fought the urge to join him in there.

He emerged several minutes later, the shirt a little too tight and the pants extremely well fitting in all necessary areas, and she had to take a calming breath. _Really Gina, get some perspective here girl! The man is a guest in your home and he would be mortified if he knew that you were mentally undressing him as soon as he stepped out the shoulder. Or that you wanted to lick that droplet of water that was running down the side of his cheek and follow it down... down... oh dear. Down, girl!_

His amused hazel eyes tracked the expressions across her face and saw her cheeks colour slightly as she caught him looking at her.

"Cover story Colonel John Sheppard! We need to come up with a valid sounding one as to how I met you... etc etc... and believe me, after the last debacle that was the end of my rather tragic love life, if a man falls into it these days, he is most definitely going to get more than the third degree. As soon as I give him your name you will be fed into the system and every misdemeanour, every speeding ticket, every bad word you ever said is going to be listed in black and white on a very thorough report. That is my father. Overprotective. Overbearing and extremely obnoxious."

John smiled at he, laughing a little at the way her hands fisted on her hips and she tilted her head provocatively as she listed her father's not so good qualities.

"But you love him? And obviously he loves you... "

"Love? Sure... why not. More like ownership, sense of duty and wanting to sweep my embarassing history under the carpet. And any man that gets associated with me, even in an extremely innocent way will have every aspect of his life instantly brought under scrutiny. So need to have an airtight story. Get your thinking cap on Colonel John Sheppard. We can't give them your real name, not with the military background – what about a family member that would have been your age in this time... something that if checked will come up as accurate?"

"I could just miss this picnic and family reunion and hang out here until you get back... sounds like finding a whole cover story is going to be hard work. Perhaps I'll wander around a little on my own, see what I can find. I'm not up for the whole lie to a general scenario. It's damn hard work, and if he's as good as you say he is, he'll likely see right through me."

"Perhaps John, although if I know my father, he already knows you're here... he's got eyes all over these damned islands..."

"Why not get out then Gina? Get away from him, start a life somewhere else? I can sense that you've had something tragic happen in your life, and likely fairly recently. But a fresh start away from his influence... you need to think about it. And do yourself a favour. I don't know that you're doing yourself one by staying here..."

He saw anger flit across her face and knew that he had crossed a line. "You can't presume to give me advice when you know nothing about my life. Fine! Stay here. I'll warn you though. There's nothing he misses. I'll go to this damned picnic and watch the fireworks and play the dutiful daughter. Because that's what is expected of me. And when I come back, perhaps you'll be here and perhaps you'll be gone..."

She finished throwing food into the hamper and whirled around, opening cupboard doors and dragging out towels and blankets. He felt guilty at her anger and moved to stop her before she hurt herself with all the banging around. "Gina.. stop.. please. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said what I did. You're right – I don't know anything about you, but I'd like you to tell me. When you get back. Go to your picnic. I'll lie low here and make sure no one comes and sees me. I'll not get you into trouble and I'll come up with a cover story in case we have to use it... if for some reason I can't find a way to get back. It's too soon now though... I can't face any more people at the moment, I just need time to get inside my own head and make some sense out of what has happened. Ok?"

He had placed his hands lightly at her waist as she stood with her head inside the large cupboard and felt the tension in her body at his touch. And couldn't seem to remove his hands when he knew he should. His thumbs stroked gently, the soft skin of her waist, warm to the touch even through the thin cotton of her sundress. "Gina, look at me."

She didn't turn and he increased his pressure slightly needing to look at her face. "Gina, please."

He saw her shoulders slump and she turned so that he saw the tears that had filled her eyes. His arms had slid around her waist as she turned and she now stood in the circle of his arms and he pulled a little tighter so that she was against him and could rest a cheek against his chest. His hands ran up her back and he felt the tension ease out of her body. Bending his head near her ear, he smelt the shampoo she used, coconut and something fruity. "Go to your picnic Gina. I'll be here when you get back. You may not know me, but you can trust me. I give you my word." He held her for a little while, a part of his mind wondering at the man who had hurt her so badly. She bore the scars like a badge and part of him wanted to take the man to pieces and feed him to the fish.


	6. Chapter 6 Time Out

CHAPTER 6 TIME OUT

He walked her down to her private dock area where a small motorboat was tied up. He held the rope while she maneovered herself and the picnic box into the back of the boat, then rolling up his pants he pushed the boat out into deeper water so that she could lower the small outboard and get the engine going.

"You ok out there in the open water on your own Gina? The mainland is a fair distance away." He looked at the island that was off in the distance then turned his gaze in a semi circle to take in this little slice of paradise she had carved out for herself here on this small private island. He could understand that need to be on one's own. To have a small corner of something to call your own. This was magic. White sand, hot sun and blue breakers that just begged to be ridden into shore, tamed by man and board. And he was itching to get the feel of a surfboard under his arm once again. Instead of looking for portals that would take him fifty years into the future. Perhaps she had a surfboard stashed around the place... this was the sixties afterall. The time of some of the greatest surfers of all time, and long boards... oh yeah!

He waved at her as she motored off, standing in the shallows, the waves lapping softly over his rolled up pants legs. A little touch of paradise... yeah...

And Gina's thoughts mirrored his own and she watched him get smaller and smaller on the shore. His head tilted back slightly to take in the sun and surroundings, and the sight of his muscular thighs in the tightly fitted pants, now wet and moulded more firmly to his body. She sighed and hoped that he would still be there when she came back that evening.

He waded back to shore and tried to find the enthusiasm to begin searching the area where she had found him. Found that said enthusiasm was sadly lacking. He kept looking out at the waves which had picked up a little in the late afternoon and shrugging his shoulders decided that the portal would still be there tomorrow. He had told Gina that he would be there when she came back and he was looking forward to seeing her, if he was truthful to himself. So with this in mind, he trudged back to her house, smelling the scent of island flowers on the breeze and thinking perhaps, life in 1962 was really not so bad.

Digging around in the old shed he found out behind her cottage, he found gold. A long board, recently waxed and ready to go, standing just waiting for him on the back wall of the shed. And he grinned. No sirree... 1962 was really not so bad...

The rest of the afternoon passed in gold plated memories, and he would treasure these moments for years to come. Paddling out to the breaker line, the feeling of his swell rolling beneath the board, and the scratch of the wax as he rose smoothly from supine position to crouch, felt the pull of muscles in his knees as he balanced, riding the tubular tunnel of water as it roiled and moved relentlessly to shore. That rare and treasured moment when the wave finally surrendered and he remained standing, proud and true and shouted to the sky. Oh yeah... this was living.

He pulled himself to the shore two hours later, as then sun began it's slow descent towards to the horizon, and he lay on the sand smiling up at the sky, feeling boneless and relaxed, thoroughly relaxed for the first time in a long time. Hawaii. He had been here in his early twenties, not long after he had enlisted. Been stationed for a short time on the airforce base in Honolulu and spent some sweet afternoons when time permitted, surfing these same breaks, forty years or so in the future. His last memory of his present time was standing on a cold planet waiting for his team to investigate some alien rock. Had he made the right choices over the years? Was he really, where he was meant to be or had he deviated from the path that he had set for himself so long ago. He couldn't remember any more. Couldn't think beyond the now and laying here on this sand, feeling as though he had purged something bad inside him and didn't move. Just lay there until finally the sky darkened and the fireworks began. And he smiled. Happy independence day. In seven years man would walk on the moon and the most ironic token of that moment in history will be the plaque signed by President Richard M. Nixon that Apollo 11 took to the Moon. It read: 'We came in peace for all mankind.' As the United States was dropping 7.5 megatons of conventional explosives on small nations in Southeast Asia, they congratulated ourselves on our humanity; we would harm no one on a lifeless rock.

And she found him here, not a long while later... the same small smile still on his face as his thoughts fought to find purchase in his mind, sought to make sense of his life, of the last fifteen years in particular. Had he compromised himself in any way by choosing to do what he did and had mankind compromised themselves by opening up the universe to exploration?

So many what ifs...

"John... John?... John!" He heard her voice from afar, had not heard the boat come in so engrossed in his thoughts. He blinked uncertainly up at her, taking in the windblown hair, the light sunburn on her shoulders and the bottle of beer she held out to him. He pushed himself up and instead of standing, she plopped herself down on the sand beside him and thrust the bottle into his hand. It was still cold so he assumed she had been carrying it in a cooler. She leaned companionably against him and shoulder to shoulder they looked out to sea, until tired, she dropped her head onto his shoulder and just rested against him while he drank his beer. He looked down at her from time to time, pondering his reaction to her and content to just sit. And be.

"So... Gina? Independence day picnic... the family? It went well?" He broke the long silence.

"It... went... let's just leave it at that. I can't do it anymore... can't be under his control. She leaped up suddenly to run back to the boat, grabbing two more beers from the cooler, bringing them back to where he still sat. She passed one bottle to him so that he could open it for her and quickly drank half of it before glancing sideways at him to see his amused expression.

"Medicinal Gina? Liquor filled courage, or anaethestic?"

"You choose John... the result is the same. I feel nothing... isn't that enough?"

He took the bottle from her hand, set it down on the sand beside his and took her face in his hands before moving his mouth gently over hers, exploring the softness of her lips, slowly at first, then with more fervour as he sensed her mounting passion. He ground out an oath and pulled away from her and answered.

"Feeling nothing? I don't think so... that wasn't nothing. And numbness? That's not the answer Gina. Whatever happened in your past, whatever that bastard did to you, if you feel nothing now, then he has won. And I'm sure you prefer not to give him that satisfaction."

He let her go and stood up, needing to put a little space between them. "You're not the sort of woman who feels nothing... there's too much heat, too much fire inside you. You've got dreams Gina, big ones and you're too scared to go after them. There's a whole exciting world out there... hell, there's more than a world, there are galaxies and more... and they're waiting for you. Go and get them."

"I'm scared... "

"I know you are. But you don't need to be." He sighed when he felt her come up behind him and wrap her arms around his middle, pulling him against her.

"We can't do this Gina... I don't know what sort of effect this could have in the future. My present. I can't knowingly change anything."

She rubbed her face against his shirt, loving his smell, needing a man to make her feel good about herself again. And somehow she knew that this man could do that.

"We'll find your portal in the morning John – can't we just have this one night together?"

He turned then, unable to bear the pain in her voice, fuelled a little he knew, by the alcohol and the intense emotions from being around her family that day. Knew too, that perhaps she didn't really need him, but needed someone to make her feel sexy, feel special, feel like a woman needs to feel. He could do that one thing for her. It need change nothing. He would still leave tomorrow. It need not affect her future or his present. One night...


	7. Chapter 7 One Night

CHAPTER 7 – ONE NIGHT

He cursed softly again. He should be strong, should say no... hell he didn't have any idea of what sort of effect this sort of stunt would have in his present, her future. But she was so damn sexy and at the moment – she needed him. One night...

He lowered his mouth to hers again, and she saw in his posture in the way that his tense muscles suddenly relaxed, that he had made his decision. He would give her this one night. And she sighed, deepening the kiss, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck to bring him even closer so that their bodies touched, at some point, all the way down. His skin seared hers even through the layers of clothing. It had been so long since she had had a man, had felt the electrical currents of pleasure that lit up her skin when his hand trailed a seductive path down her bare arm, then dropped so that it touched her dress, pulling slightly so that the dress rose, scrunched up in his larged hands. She then felt his fingers touch her leg and she couldn't hold back the shiver now. Bare skin under his hand – this man from fifty years in the future... a paradox, something that should not exist.

And yet he did. She felt his own need, pushed hard against her stomach and she moved slightly against it causing him to groan and pull his lips back from their kiss. When she looked up into his eyes, they were hooded and hot... oh so hot and she wanted him, right then.

She fumbled a little in her haste, attempting to unbutton his shirt and giggled. The buttons were not bowing to her demands and she did what all good romance novels advised a girl to do... she simply ripped and her giggle became a laugh as buttons flew in all directions and a rumble of laughter came out of the man whose magnificent chest was now bared to the warm summer night. Of their own accord, her hands spread out across his warm skin, lightly sprinkled with hair and beautifully muscled.

"Aaahh Gina... why couldn't I have met you fifty years in the future...that in itself, is the damn paradox. One night? I suspect that one night will be more than that... I'll have fifty years of memories of this one night."

His own hands were busy now and they pulled down the thin straps of her summer dress, exposing her lovely breasts for the first time. She wore no bra underneath and his breath hitched a little as he bent to take one tantalising nipple into his mouth, taste it almost reverently, then suckle a little harder bringing a sharp intake of breath from Gina.

"Colonel John Sheppard – a man of both profound statements and even more profound actions... seems you future men could teach some of your ancestors a thing or two..hmmm?" She smiled around the pleasure that was building and now he had dropped to his knees in front of her and she found that her summer dress had pooled into a puddle of fabric around her feet and he had taken her waist lightly in his hands and his mouth was moving lower, his tongue tasting her skin to swirl inside her belly button, bringing the hot aching need to a clenching frenzy.

His face tipped up briefly and she saw the sparkle of his eyes and watching the moonlight begin to play it's erotic fingers over his back. Transfixed she watch the play of muscles as he moved and her fingers reached down to trace them.

_Would one night with this man be enough Gina? Perhaps he is really not from the future. Perhaps you have conjured him up out of your imagination, alone on this island too long – a dream lover who brings no demands, no confusion – just pleasure. Perhaps in the morning you will wake and he'll be gone, just as he should be – with the light of day..._

His hands had caught in the elastic of her panties, and these were sliding down her legs now, his hot mouth following their path and she felt her legs begin to lose formation, to lose strength and knew that they would not support her for long. His mouth hovered briefly over her hot and aching centre and his tongue, an impulsive streak of devilry, darted inside to entice and heat and she widened her legs slightly as his hands moved lower to grip her hips now, sensing that would soon no longer be able to stand unaided.

She fisted her hands in his hair, feeling the salty texture and brought his face up so that she could sink to her knees herself and kiss him again, hard and needy, tasting herself on his tongue.

She took control then, as she needed to. Pushing him back onto the still warm sand, she undid his pants and began sliding them down his legs, doing some exploration of her own, caressing his firmly erect manhood that begging for attention of its own as it was freed from his confinement. She slid her hands down it's silky length, imagining herself encased around it and caught the amusement in his eye.

"What's so funny Colonel John Sheppard..." She arched her eyebrow at him.

"Your expressions sweetheart... your face is so transparent. Do it! Do what you imagine you want to do... you'll get no complaints from me..."

Keeping her eyes firmly on his she did just that. Almost delicately, she eased herself onto him, feeling the burn the moment his manhood entered her, a burn that brought heat and passion and something so much more to this union beneath the summer moon. He grasped her hips to steady her, saw the expressions flitter impulsively across her face and felt the rhythm that was known to man and woman throughout time it would seem, begin to take them on their erotic journey to find their respective peace.

She climaxed first, her head thrown back and the long line of her neck arched gracefully and he longed to bury his face in there and spend a lifetime lost in her scent. He drank her in, the dark hair that tumbled over her shoulders, the delectible breasts that even now, his hand reached up to hold possessively and her lovely face, so very beautiful in the moonlight. Then his own release came, and it was the end to a day that should not have had pleasure, but had brought more peace to a troubled mind than any other day in such a long time.

_And I had to go back fifty years to find that peace? That sense of fulfillment? What just happened Sheppard? You have a life, it works – you fight aliens, you keep a galaxy from the brink of turmoil, you fly ships that you only dreamed of as a little boy. Hell Sheppard – you are living your dream. Yet, here and now – you have found more peace in this one day, with these simple pleasures and this beautiful woman than five years of living your dream. So, what is reality? Is it your past , your present or your future? _

He looked down at the woman in his arms and wished that she could be all three. One night... he had given her that – he would give her that. _But I won't lie to myself... I'm giving it to myself as well... one night..._


	8. Chapter 8 The Search

CHAPTER 8 – THE SEARCH

When he awoke in the morning it was to the sun's first tentative rays peeking over the horizon to bring the azure brilliance of the Pacific ocean to a gem like shine. He shaded his eyes slightly, registering that he still lay on the sand, although a light blanket now covered him and turning, he saw that the dented area beside him,was empty. Sometime during that long night _… one night..._ as he told himself again, she had gotten up and gone into the cottage to get a blanket for warmth.

Blinking a little now he sat up, and his gaze again, was drawn to the magic that unfolded before him as the heavens open their doors and poured liquid gold down below. Hell yeah – this was one piece of paradise on earth. The Pegasus Galaxy? A million light years ago, and fifty years in the future... a future that was beginning to blur, just a little for him.

He heard singing from a distance and smiled. She had a lovely voice and it was a song he did not recognise. _Likely before my time..._ and smiled again. Everything here was before his time. But time today, to do something about that. Time today, to search for the portal where he had come through. Dreams and beautiful moments aside, he did not belong here and if he chose to stay – there would be ripples and effects that did not bear thinking about. So find the portal he would, and knew also, that the team on the other side were attempting to do the same thing. Knew that Rodney would not sleep until he discovered where the Colonel had gone. He was that kind of guy. For all his faults, Rodney knew the creed that John both lived by and insisted his team follow. _You left no one behind – ever!_

The singing got closer and he saw her then and it was more than just his face that smiled. Hell, his heart smiled – if that was even possible. And knew too, that if Rodney was here, he would have some derisive and totally scientific reason as to why this could not possibly happen. But for today, for this _now_ – damn, his heart most definitely was smiling. What looked like some beach goddess strolled across the sand towards him, hair waving attractively in the early morning breeze and that warm sunkissed look on her face with eyes that just spoke beautifully of a woman who had been loved. Oh yeah, she made his heart smile...

"John! You missed the most beautiful time of the day... sunrise on my island. Something I rarely miss. It gives me that special lift and makes the day begin... as it should."

She reached him and passed down the tray in her hand and he smelled bacon and freshly squeezed tropical juice, and closed his eyes to savour yet another magical sensation of that morning. Then set the tray down and grasping her ankle firmly, ran his hand up the length of her leg as it stood in front of him and growled. "I know of another pleasurable way to begin the day..."

She laughed and dropped down onto the sand beside him, dropping her head lightly against his shoulder. "One night Colonel John Sheppard. One night... then we search for your portal, your way home. We'll do as we said. And John? Thank you... it was one night I will not forget – not for the next fifty years. And on July 4 2012, if I should still be here in this world, I will think of you and know that you step back into my time and it will all begin again..."

She reached across him for the tray and he smelt the aroma of coconuts and tropical fruit that came from her freshly washed hair and wanted nothing more than to bury his face in it, in her and tell the next fifty years to go to hell. _Not gonna happen John. Time to go home. People are waiting for you and you need to let this lady live her life, her way. You cannot influence her... _

They ate in companionable silence watching the sun as it rose relentlessly higher in the sky and the water became even more brilliantly hued with shades of blues and greens. The heat began to build and at last they stirred themselves and he rose, brushing sand off himself and offering a hand down to help her up.

"Let's go find that portal Gina..."

They spent an hour searching the area where she had found him lying on the beach yesterday morning. Just twenty four hours ago. _A lifetime ago..._ thought John and did not imagine that so much could happen in a short twenty four hours.

"I was just lying on the sand... nothing was around me? No glowing ring? No rippling area in the air? Forgive me if I sound a little insane, but I'm not even sure what this portal would look like. On my side, it was a construction of polished stones, not a ring, but there was a space in between and when the connection was made – whatever the connection it was? This purple light went from one side of the construction to the other, forming a solid puddle – I don't remember touching it or going through it willingly, so I have to assume I was pulled into it somehow. I don't even know I opened it up, whether it was something it registered in me? As I said, I didn't touch it to start with..."

_Ah hell_ thought John _just what the hell had happened. How did he even begin to explain time travel to her when he didn't even understand it himself?_


	9. Chapter 9 Conundrums

CHAPTER 8 – CONUNDRUMS

_But she understands more than you give her credit for John..._

"John, we have the conundrum here... it's 1962 - time travel is not only theoretically impossible, it is simply the stuff of science fiction. Yes, we can look here to see if there is an obvious portal - but think about it. If it was so obvious, would it not have been discovered already, in this time. Is time travel an actual event in your time? Or is it accidental and no actual physics can place constraints and probabilities on it?"

"Wow - you and Rodney... a match made in heaven. Wish that you could get the chance to meet him. Gina - you have a degree in phsyics - time travel obviously, is not possible... but what do you know - scientifically at least, about it. Are there weather conditions perhaps, that could possible make the rift in time, the space time continuium shift... or whatever the hell it does. You're the scientist here? What can _you_ tell _me_!"

"Hell John - to go back in a moment in time... define a moment in time...Looking at time travel with just these details is not detailed enough. A moment in time has many other factors including:Where the Earth was in relation to the sun, where the sun was in relation to the solar system, and where the solar system was in relation to the moment in time is defined by the location of every atom in the universe and their precise distance from each other. Consider traveling back in time to a nighttime situation. If time travel only affected the Earth, then the Sun, stars, planets, etc would be in the wrong location, and a "hiccup" would be felt by all. So traveling back in time can't be accomplished by simply recreating the exact situation, since we must also recreate the position of the very stars. our device would have to affect the entire universe. This is entirely impossible. Under no circumstances could we ever affect the entire universe to replay a past event."

She saw him try to understand, and knew that a part of him did because even without the same physics degree that she had spent years obtaining, he had spent years living, breathing and training pure physics in way that she could never begin to comprehend. So it was not a case of the blind leading the blind, rather the informed leading the knowledgeable. Perhaps they could come to some sort of logical conclusion, could help him get back. She had contacts from her masters days, professors, other scientists who would die happy today, if they could interact, speak with someone from the future, acknowledge the fact that what they had only dreamed about, did exist and could in fact happen. But knew also, that the risk of involving others, was too great.

John thought now, not just about Rodney who she would have thoroughly enjoyed discussing theoretical physics with, but a certain famous cosmologist who would have opened her mind still further and challenged her assumptions and findings. He chose to share this small bit of information with her, knowing that what he told her would not affect the future in any way.

"There will be a great physicist soon, who will have some wonderful theories about time travel among other things and he suggested that the absence of tourists from the future is an argument against the existence of time travel and he also noted that time travel might only be possible in a region of spacetime that is warped in the correct way, and that if we cannot create such a region until the future, then time travelers would not be able to travel back before that date, and so would explain why you haven't been over run by tourists from the future." He was speaking of course of Stephen Hawking, who at this current point of time was only just beginning has studies in his chosen field.

John collapsed a little despondently on the sand. "I can spout time travel theories with you till I'm blue in the face. Your knowledge versus mine. Your degree versus my actually living it – but where does that leave us? Gina... I don't know what to say, what to feel. I need to get back - I know that, but I have the sinking feeling that whatever I activated on the other side can only be activated from there. I think you are right... if it was obvious here, then it would have been done... but therein lies another conundrum - how exactly do you know it hasn't already been done...there you go, my head is officially about to explode once again. Aaah Rodney, I need you my friend... and if you ever get me out of this mess, I'm guessing you'll make me pay for the rest of my life..."

"John, if it's any consolotation, and I doubt very much that it is. Your portal I think, is two way - but conditions must be met precisely in order for it to open, and I am doubtful whether those conditions can be mirrored from here. It may be weather, but I think it must be something more than that. It could be the alignment of the stars a certain way that allows space time to change. The variables are endless, the configurations mindboggling and it is a theoretical nightmare that scientists have been pondering for as long as physics has been a formal science. Time travel has been the light at the end of the tunnel. Theoretical wormholes..."

John laughed at this. "Well... Gina - not theoretical anymore... the stargate - remember? Wormhole - and very much working and proven. But it does not support time travel, at least not the ones used by the stargates. They fold space, effectively allowing you to step from one point to another a huge distance away, simultaneously - more or less. I'm sure you have a more than adequate understanding of theoretical wormhole physics so I don't need to go into detail - but to use a wormhole for proposed time travel, it needs to be a traversable wormhole - here it gets a little too technical for me - I strictly have my degree in wormhole 101..."

She had come up behind him and rested her hands lightly on his shoulders, then feeling the warmth of the sun settle there also, she massaged lightly, then tightened her fingers as he groaned slightly.

"Aaah Gina,that feels magic sweetheart... makes me forget all about wormholes and damn time travel and makes me start thinking about... other stuff." And she laughed at the gleam in his eye and she had to avoid his hands which snaked out to run up her bare legs.

"Damn!" The word exploded out of her softly.

His hand still on her leg and he peered up at her. "What's up Gina?"

"Visitors John... we're about to have company. In the form of a US airforce general. Looks like he saw right through me yesterday. Damn! I can't hide anything from that man. He knew something was up - his radar is beyond anything you can imagine."

His hand abruptly left her leg at this news and he rose quickly, his eyes scanning the ocean to see the boat coming toward them.

"How's that cover story Colonel John Sheppard? Oh, this is so not going to be fun...crap and double crap!"

He looked at her sharply, a quick laugh rumbling out of him. "Language sweetheart! Daddy's about to arrive, so clean it up! And as to that cover story.. been thinking about that one. He'll see through anything I try and come up with. Let's go with the truth. We just lucked out with our own search and while I know that Rodney and the rest of my team will not sleep until they have a solution, we need to do something from this end. And I think it starts with your father. He'll know I'm on the up and up. I know just how to convince him..."

"Well you had better keep your fingers crossed John and hope that he does believe you... because if he doesn't, you'll end up in military prison and that's going to make your job of getting home just a little harder..."


	10. Chapter 10 Generals

CHAPTER 10 GENERALS

_Just what the hell was it about generals_... John wondered. _Damn, they were big... and scary_. He thought briefly about General O'Neill, his own commanding officer based out of Stargate Command in Colorado Springs. The man was huge and a little scary to look at, but underneath it all, the interior of a pussy cat. Looking up at the forbidding general who stood before him, giving him a not so pleasant once over with his ice blue eyes, he mentally cringed. This was no pussy cat. The man probably crapped diamond chips, hell he looked as though diamond chips would be a very quick result if coal was shoved up his ass. And had to bite down on the bark of laughter that threatened to erupt and quickly schooled his features to show suitable respect for the large man with the formidable face that stood facing him now, likely wondering just what the hell he was doing on this island with his daughter. _Damned if I know General... damned if I know..._

John was the first to place his hand out in the gesture to shake and with no hesitation at all the General took it. His grip was firm, exceptionally so but not to the point where it was a pissing contest between the two men. Respect in every nuance of his posture, John looked him in the eye and saw the wary respect come into the general's. They would be fine. He sensed immediately that the general was a good man - a tough one yes, but the love in his eyes when he looked at his daughter was clear and while Gina may have chosen to see otherwise, John chose to acknowledge it. And his direct stare into the ice blue eyes of the general, told the senior man exactly where his thoughts lay.

"Daddy - what a surprise. I only saw you yesterday - is something wrong?" Gina pretended innocence and John's sideways glance at her crystalline blue eyes showed lowered lashes as she attempted to sweet talk her father and had to push down a laugh at the resolute look in the general's eyes. This was a long playing game, in which John suspected,there were never any winners.

"Heard there was a stranger on the island. Came over to see for myself - to make sure you've not gotten yourself into any more trouble." And it was the dejected slump of Gina's shoulders that had John stepping closer to her and pulling himself up even taller, effectively letting her father know that maybe he was trouble, but not the sort he assumed.

"Colonel John Sheppard, US Airforce - General, sir!" John stood to attention, something he only reserved for general's and brought his hand up in a crisp salute. He watched the general's eyes change, saw the shift in focus and watched the information begin to process.

"Stationed where, Colonel?" The shift in his eyes again, noting the lack of uniform but knew by the man's bearing and presence that he was indeed military.

"That would be where the story becomes a little less clear cut - sir...I don't suppose you've heard of the stargate programme?" He felt Gina beside him, felt her tense and the sharp intake of breath as she realised what he was about to do. And watched the general's eyes, saw the telltale flicker and gave a small smile. The general knew something, that much was immediately clear.

"I might have heard a little buzz about it - what do you have to do with it?" The general's eyes had hardened now and John knew that he had registered the implication of what the programme stood for and knew that the Colonel standing in front of him was more, much more than what he imagined.

Gina broke through the tension that had started to build. She pulled on her father's arm, and shooting John a look from beneath her still slightly lowered lashes, she went to usher to father up the beach and toward her cottage. "Let's go inside Daddy. It's a long story. John needs help, the sort of help that only someone with your connections can find for him. We need to get him home.. "

Seated at the small table in the kitchen, John desperately wanted to know just how much information the general was privy to about the stargate programme. He had known that work was underway in the sixties to find out how to worked, but he had thought it began later. This did not appear to be the case. The general knew something and if this was true, perhaps some sort of help would be available on this side of his time travel.

John started his story and watched carefully, the general's reaction. Gina appeared restless and jumped up from time to time to pour drinks, make lunch and sometimes just to stand behind John's chair giving him show of support she though he needed. And each time that she did this, John saw her father's eyes sharpen. The older man knew that something was growing between his daughter and the Colonel who sat across from the table from him and was not sure how he felt about it. He told the general more than what he needed to know, felt the relief of getting if off his chest so that perhaps he could give someone the chance to help him.

"You live in another galaxy? You are fighting a war against an alien species that feeds off human life force? Hell son, I've watched my share of science fiction and grew up like any other little boy - looking to the stars and wanting to fly to the moon. What you say is too detailed not to be the truth - and I sense in you that it is the truth. I consider myself an excellent judge of character, I read all the nuances in people and know exactly when a truth becomes a lie. I see only the truth. But time travel? This is beyond anything we can do more than theorize about now. I'm sure you've been told all this from my daughter. She's the physicist in the family. She will understand the limitations more than anybody."

John felt that restlessness take him over again and impatiently he ran his hand through his hair and pushed his chair away from the table. Gina swung her gaze to her, saw the agitation in his stance and tried to calm him with her eyes. And failed.

'I know this is a lot to take in General, and with all due respect sir, may I speak frankly here?"

"Go ahead son, we're not on the base at the moment. Let's keep it a little more casual for now. What do you want to say." The general felt a connection with the younger man, as though they shared more than a thread through the last fifty years and more than a little envy at what this very lucky Colonel had been fortunate to be able to do in his career. He longed to take a walk on the beach with him, man to man, not General to Colonel and speak freely about the things that John had seen, and the craft he had flown and the battles he had waged. He also saw the way that his daughter looked at him and wanted nothing more than to stop the hurt he knew would be sure to bloom once the Colonel went back to his own time line. If he went back to his own time line.

"Do you have connections Sir, at the base? Do you know of anyone who is working on the stargate programme? I saw your eyes when I first mentioned it. I saw that it wasn't the first time you had heard of it. If you can introduce me - I know I'm not supposed to intereact with anyone in this time line, I know that the consequences could be far reaching. I don't know what to do. And that scares me more than anything General. I'm used to being in charge. I'm used to being the one to make the decisions to look after my team. My superior officer is another galaxy away. I answer to myself, most of the time and this time, I can't fix this myself. I need my team. I need your help. Or failing that, I wait and hope that they are doing something to find a way to get me home."

The general stood now, knowing that he needed to go back to base and try to make some very discreet inquiries. "Tomorrow Colonel. I'll see what I can do from my end and we'll talk again tomorrow. There's a few names, a few favours I'm owed, but I'll keep it as discreet as I can. You hit the nail on the head with the possible consequences of interference. We need to be sure, that what we do can cause no ripples down the line."

He bent to kiss his daughter on this cheek and shook John's hand. "It's been a pleasure to meet you Colonel. A pleasure indeed. Makes me proud to know that our future is in the hands of someone like yourself. And what a wonderful feeling to know that we made it to the stars." He flicked a salute at John and this was promptly returned. Ingrained habit and this brought a smile to his face. Then felt Gina's hand touch his neck lightly as her father walked out of sight and thought he would burst if he didn't take her into his arms now.

She moaned slightly as she moulded herself to him. "Not many men win my father over John, but he showed you respect and that is a hard thing to win from my father."

"He's a good man Gina. Go a little easier on him. Now come here - I need to do something that your father would likely not approve of..." He laughed, running his hands up and under her tshirt, feeling no bra and hearing her breath come a little quicker as his hands flickered over her tight nipples.

"Mmmm..." she sighed. "Nice... don't stop..."

"Aaah, but there's other places to explore... just as soft, just as sweet..." His hands left her breasts and eased down to her cotton shorts and fitted in under her waist band to cup her soft bottom. Kneading slightly he heard her soft moans and felt her own hands begin their exploration and his trousers were unzippered quickly and easily. She grasped him and slid her fingers backwards and forwards under the tightness and smiled as his own breathing became just a little ragged. She pushed his down onto the seat again and quickly removing her shorts and panties, she climbed onto his lap, a wicked smile on her face.

"Ok, so like that hmmm?"

"Like that Colonel... " and she purred as she slid over his hard length and felt the immediate build up of friction. He reached around to cup her bottom again, and slid his finger under, lower and looking up into her eyes now, he saw that they were brilliantly blue and wide open, watching him. She dropped her head to kiss him hard and when she cried out she was still kissing him.

They didn't move for a long while. Holding her tight against him felt wonderful and when she finally stirred it was to suggest a late afternoon swim before dinner and it was only a very small part of his mind that remained back in the Pegasus galaxy wondering just how his friends were coming along with their rescue plans...


	11. Chapter 11 Meanwhile

CHAPTER 11 - MEANWHILE...

Meanwhile back in the Pegasus galaxy John's team had gathered together around the stargate on _P8T198_ . He had been missing for two hours now and they had radioed Atlantis to inform Elizabeth. She had advised them to continue the search and she would send through another team to assist them.

Rodney was cold, miserable and feeling more than just a little resentful towards the missing Colonel. "I bet he's curled up somewhere nice and warm, sound asleep and likely already got hold of a hot cup of coffee while we, on the other hand, are stuck here on this freezing cold ball of rocks looking for his rather disobedient and selfish person."

Ronon glared at Rodney. "Shut it McKay. Sheppard's missing. I saw him head in that direction..." he pointed towards the rock structure that John had indeed been heading in and had inadvertently discovered was some sort of time machine.

Rodney took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Ok Ronon. What was the last thing you can recall seeing him do. Did he touch anything? Did he disturb anything? Did he appear to be engaged in any sort of activity that looked remotely suspicious?"

"He waited until I had acknowledged he was leaving - as is his usual protocol, then I watched him turn and walk in that direction. I didn't see what he did when he got there. I didn't see anyone else around. The next time I looked up to check where he was, he was gone. That's when I went over to investigate. Nothing, no sign. Just his tracks leading there just as I told you."

Ronon was not accustomed to long speeches and that one certainly took him more than his usual amount of effort. But John was his friend, and if the man was missing, then he'd jump through hoops if necessary to find him. As Sheppard would do for any one of them.

Rodney gave Ronon a quick glance, then pressed his radio to contact Atlantis again. "We'll keep searching Elizabeth until the new team arrives. We'll use Ronon's tracking skills and see if we can at least ascertain whether he left the area voluntarily or was taken by force." He waited for her response, then looked at Ronon. "Lead on."

Ronon gave his usual brooding look to Rodney, and as usual Rodney managed to sidestep him to keep from getting too close. The big Satedan scared him. The strong silent type and very protective of his friends. Sheppard being one of them. And he did not appear to like scientists very much. That much had been made clear to Rodney on more than one occasion.

Ronon was able to track him quite clearly to the stone structure and from there the tracks stopped. They did not turn and leave the area, nor did they move forward in any way. They just stopped. Ronon got down on one knee and moved some of the stones around. He could see the scuffing that John's boots had left on some of the larger rocks, a clear sign that he had stood there for some time.

Rodney was particularly fascinated with the stone structure, and the smoothness of the rocks was a direct contrast to all the other rocks found in the immediate area. They were varying sizes, but all very sharp and these stones appeared to have been repeatedly tumbled to gain the smooth finish that almost glossed them. Teyla went to reach out a hand to touch the structure but Rodney immediately grabbed her wrist to halt her.

"Teyla! Sheppard's tracks stop here. Whatever happened to him, whereever he has gone, it seems to have been to do with that structure. There are no life signs on this planet, not in the immediate vicinity anyway... whatever happened to him, it began here." He released Teyla's wrist at the sharp glance she sent his way. "We can't risk the same thing happening to us Teyla. Not until we know that these rocks are... bad enough that we have to mount a rescue for one, can't afford to have any more disappearances."

Teyla withdrew her hand from his,nodding once. What he said made sense and while she wanted to find their commander as much as anyone, she understood the need for caution.

Rodney started moving his hands through the air, taking small steps in all directions and keeping his hands outstretched. Teyla was alarmed. "Rodney? What are you doing?"

"This device might render him invisible. He may be standing there right now, looking at us - hell, likely yelling at me to solve the damn puzzle and get him out. Actually... I can almost hear him... anyone else hear that?"

Ronon snorted derisively. "That's the other team coming through the gate McKay. I can't hear Sheppard. I can't see Sheppard. He's not here. We need to find him, not stand around waving our hands at invisible people or whatever it is the hell you are doing!"

"Don't knock it Ronon!" Rodney tampered down his rising anger a little. It didn't pay to show any form of anger toward Ronon. He was bigger. Much much bigger. "I've been on missions before, with SG1 where one of the team members went through a field that was a portal to another dimension. And the whole time they were right there, but neither dimension could interact with the other. This may have happened. We can't touch these stones until we have had time to study them and find out what sort of properties they contain. I'm going to get a special science team put together along with a lot of warm clothes, the means to build a big fire, and lots of coffee... did I mention lot's of coffee? Then Ronon, I will find what happened to Colonel Sheppard. If these stones have acted as some sort of portal, I'll find out what it was and open it back up. And we'll bring him back."

He rubbed his hands together now, the intense cold of this planet starting to get to him and he closed his eyes imagining the first sip of that cup of hot coffee. Damn Sheppard... couldn't he have found a more comfortable planet to disappear on. Hell!

Ronon's sharp voice interupted his thoughts and he knew that the big man would not rest until Rodney began work and would likely stand over him with a whip the whole time to make sure there was no slacking off.

"Do it Rodney. Stop talking and just do it!"


	12. Chapter 12 Needle in a Haystack

CHAPTER 12 NEEDLE IN A HAYSTACK

Something soft underneath him his time as he woke, a mattress, a pillow and a soft body at his side. Seems as though this time they had spent the night in a bed – her bed. _That's two nights_ thought John. _I was only supposed to give her one night, but two nights? Isn't that breaking some sort of rule? Yeah, it means that it's no longer a one night stand..." _And as he looked down across her naked back as she sprawled comfortably on her stomach, dark hair spread in disarray he knew he had crossed a line. _One night stand? Sure..._ Was never gonna happen.

She stirred and he crept quietly from the bed, edging out the door, grabbing the surfboard that he had left somewhat negligently against the wall of the house and looked down at himself in glee. Naked! Hell yeah! Surfing in 1962, on some remote Hawaiian island just as the sun was coming up. Naked. It didn't get any better than that.

The swells were pure virgins, unbroken, untamed and as he shot through one azure tunnel after another, he threw back his head and yelled in delight. And what a sight he was to Gina who now stood on the beach watching him. A man of stunning physique, standing proudly atop a surfboard, head held slightly back as his primal delight broke out. Naked.

She laughed then, the sound carrying out to him and feeling as though he could now face whatever this day would bring be paddled in, dropping the longboard on the sand and pushing his wet hair back from his face.

"I don't know about your time John, but here, it is customary to wear swimming trunks when you go out into the water." Her eyes sparkled as she said it and suddenly he was pulling her tshirt off in one fluid movement, picking her up and moving purposefully out into the water. And unceremoniously dumping her under.

She came up spluttering and laughing and something in his eyes changed, grew hot with need and she found herself back on the cooler wet sand, on her back with a dangerous looking Colonel entering her in one poweful thrust. She had to push back the thought that when he left, her heart would surely break.

Honolulu was different than he remembered. Very few tourists, and he had to remember that commercial air travel was still a fledging activity and would not take off for several more years yet. A lot of military presence, John saw navy, airforce, marine and army uniforms and recalled that Pearl Harbour was still a not so remote memory in the minds of these people.

"Are you ready for this John?" Gina tugged gently on his hand, and he in turn dropped a light kiss onto her mouth, needing to get that out of the way before they came under scrutiny from her father. "When I rang my father he was carefully vague on the phone, obviously concerned that the wrong people may be listening. If there is something to be found out, I guarantee my father will make it his mission to find it."

They were ushered into his office and the general rose from behind his desk to shake John's hand.

"Before we get started son, I need to ask you something. Do you have any connection at all with Hawaii, Honolulu and in particular this airforce base? There's a reason I'm asking."

"I know why you're asking General. I've asked myself the same question. Why was I sent here? To this time, to this place? It's not random, it can't be – and the very fact that my team and the scientists in Atlantis have not yet sent anyone else back yet is likely because the code that opens the portal is specific only to something in me... and I have a theory about that." He stopped talking and took a deep breath. "There's some other things you need to know and understand. When the people of Atlantis sunk their city and left 10,000 years ago, they scattered throughout the galaxies and many came to earth. Through the stargate."

He saw the gleam in the general's eye and felt Gina's hand grasp his under the cover of the desk. He gave her hand a gentle squeeze in return.

"They blended into the earth way of life, chosing mates from within the humans they bonded with and their gene, this special ancient gene we call ATA or Ancient Technology Activation gene became diluted and spread amongst humans. Many of us have it. It lies dormant mostly, but in the Pegasus galaxy it is used to power and operate much of the technology built by the ancient Lantiens. I have that gene and it is very strong. It allows me to operate most of the technology within the galaxy that was build by the ancients. I've had a little time to give this some thought and I've come up with a theory of sorts."

He paused again and leant back a little more in his seat. His thoughts still churned through his mind, but being out on the water this morning, he had been able to put some of them into clarity.

"The stone portal reacted quite specifically to me and likely to the strength of my ATA gene and sent me here for a reason. To stop something. You asked me, General, whether I had connections here in Hawaii? I was stationed here for a short time in the mid 1990's and I will give you a list of all the ranking military officers I had contact with. But... I don't think that's the connection. I suspect I am here to either stop something, or start something...an event that has far reaching implications into the future."

The general huffed a breath and closed his eyes briefly. "Colonel...my mind is feeling just a little dazed by all the information you have thrown at me. Yesterday I struggled with galaxies beyond ours, time travel and aliens that suck the life force from humans. Today? Today, I try and assimilate ancient genes and acknowledge that you came here by design and not by chance. Which effectively means that someone or something here at this very time is your reason for being here. We're talking a needle in a haystack son! A very big haystack!"

"I know that General – I also know I can't go back until I understand why I'm here." He felt the air move suddenly and knew that Gina was staring at him wide eyed.

"Do you believe in fate, John?"

"Maybe not fate Gina, but I believe the universe has a predestined grand design for us all – some call that fate perhaps? We're all here, not by chance but by purpose." Fingers of something restless began to settle over his skin. He needed to move soon.

"What if your team are successful in figuring out exactly as you have done – what then?" Gina had taken over the questioning from her father, while he sat, staring not at John now, but into space as though his own thoughts were just a little too much to process right now.

"If I figured it out Gina, it is more than likely that Rodney has also by now. I've never known him to fail at anything... except when he glew up that sun accidentally..." He saw the alarm come into the general's eyes and tried to play it down. He certainly didn't want him thinking that they were irresponsible in the future. And recalled riding a surfboard naked this morning and decided that irresponsibility was obviously in his genes. Whichever century he was in! He did however, attempt to put the General at ease.

"He'll have figured it out, but if I am right – he'll need to replicate the exact amount of gene I hold. As I said, I have the strongest ATA gene in the city, so whoever he sends through will need to be given an additional dose to simulate my personal degree of gene saturation, or the time line will be wrong. Rodney will be working right now to make sure the calculation is perfect. While he does that we need to find the connection here. Lists, people, events – everything that could be pertinent even marginally. And I need to think back in my history to find out what event was due to occur this year – is yet to occur this year. It may appear to be of little significance and it will have a far reaching and obviously dangerous effect in the future. Needle in a haystack General? More like a atom... there are so many variables, so many tiny events that could cause the ripple that someone from my present obviously wanted to stop..."

The magnitude of the task weighed down on him now and a part of him wished that he had not made any progress in figuring out the why of his being sent back here. No guarantees of course, that he was right, but the more the thoughts swirled in his head, the more he became convinced this was the reason he had ended up here, on earth, fifty years in the past. To stop something from happening. He attempted to drag his mind from his thoughts as Gina moved restlessly beside him and returned to her questions.

"This device John, who would have designed it? Someone from "now" who in the future realises that something is needed to be stopped? Time travel and paradoxes – if you think about ramifications, implications, theoretical possibilities – it's like going around in a dizzying circle and getting no where."

"My wager would be on the ancient Lantiens... they built fail safes all over the galaxy. This particular portal was put way off the beaten track on a planet no one ever went to. Hidden away and I'm guessing a little here, but I think it may have the ability to draw it's intended recipient – in this case me – using an energy spike. And I fell for it hook line and sinker."

The General slapped his hand on his desk and picked up his phone to call his secretary. "We need information Mavis, newspapers, books, articles, magazines – anything and everything about current events. All about what's happening here today, or events that are scheduled to happen. Have them brought to the conference room along with refreshments. We are not to be disturbed."

He rose from his chair after replacing his telephone and John and Gina both did the same. John sighed. "Internet... didn't think I would miss it so much..."

At their quizzical glances, John attempted a small smile. "Aaah... so many wonderful things coming, and you'll just have to discover them on your own. Let's just say that looking up information in the future is very very easy..."


	13. Chapter 13 To Find the Future

CHAPTER 13 – INTO THE PAST TO FIND THE FUTURE

Three hours later and John sprawled more than a little uncomfortably around the large conference table and his eyes felt as though specks of dust had deliberately gravitated from every part of the room and had settled uncompromisingly into his eyes. He rubbed them now, and yawned.

"1962 – seems it was a big year! Going from my own recall of history – a couple of big ones. Marilyn Munro dies..."

At the gasp he heard, he turned his head slightly to take in Gina's wide eyed shock. "Dead? How?"

"Can't tell you that, but the world mourned, suffice to say... she was a rather .. fetching... woman."

"Even in your time? Dead? Wow..." He wondered at whether he should have imparted that piece of news, but if no details were given, then nothing could be done to change anything, at least that is how he rationalised it in his mind.

"She's still, in my day, the epitome of the the most sexy woman in the world. All women aspire to look like her, all those curves, blonde hair and that sexy voice..."

The general cleared his throat rather loudly and looked pointedly at John, who managed to blush just a little. He had forgotten for a moment who he was speaking to.

"Aaah sorry, sir... to get back on track. The cuban missile crisis – coming up later this year – that'll be a big one for you, and could possibly be something that I could be sent here to stop... but this one in particular intrigues me..."

He pointed to some newspaper clippings he had spread around him, and dragged his hand tiredly across his cheeks hearing the rasp of beard and realised that he hadn't shaven for two days. He needed to stop in town on the way back and grab some supplies. Then sighed. It seemed money was going to be an issue.. in that he technically didn't have any... yet.

"Project Mercury..."

At the mention of this the general's eyes shot to his. "Been receiving a lot of press coverage. Since 1958 it's taken the critical step to demonstrate that humans can survive spaceflight and that a spacecraft can be designed to land humans into orbit then return them safely to earth. It is the first major undertaking of NASA."

"All very true General, but there is something scheduled to happen later this year... the longest mission in the Mercury Project – astronaut Walter Schirra... he circles the earth six times for a total of nine hours and 13 minutes in his Sigma 7 craft and falls into the ocean around Hawaii. He is taken back here to Hickam before returning to the mainland."

"That's exciting news, and definitely a progressive step in our spaceflight programme, but why would you need to stop this?" The general showed confusion now.

"He drops into the ocean for a short period of time..." John was talking to himself now, figuring scenarios in his head, factoring in everything that he could remember about this particular astronaut. " His only connection with here, and now is that fact that he drops in the ocean here... does he find something? Does something find him? Is there something in the water, something that has lain dormant... does he somehow activate it? Does he have the gene? He's the only astronaut in American history to fly all three missions – Mercury, Gemini and Apollo... what does that tell us? He must have the gene... and he must have found something, something he was not meant to find? Damn... I need Rodney on this!"

John tried to ignore the confusion on the general's face. The Gemini and Apollo projects were from his future and these names would mean nothing to him. But they did to John and the more the thoughts churned like thickening butter in his head, the more he knew he was on the right track. It was as though something was guiding him. Something or someone that sat just out of his range of vision.

He stood and paced around the room, running his hands through his hair angrily and Gina watched him in fascination. This was no doubt the Colonel John Sheppard who fought aliens in another galaxy, the Colonel John Sheppard who commanded space crafts that they could not possibly begin to comprehend.

"Damn it! I've been through all this... the only one that pulls at me – is this landing into the water after the orbiting of earth. This keeps pulling at me... and I've learned not to ignore those spidey senses that sit like a damn monkey on my shoulder and tell me what to do. This has got to be it. I don't know how and I don't know why – but it's set to happen in October of this year, so I'm thinking that I'm meant to stop something... not the flight, no... crap!" With the barest flicker of apology for his words, John banged the table. That presence he felt, it had become tangible – not his spidey senses, not this time, something else that guided him now. Something ancient. And the dots had begun to connect with terrifying clarity.

"I know what it is. Damn it – I know!"

He whirled around now and even the general took a step back from the ferocious gleam in the younger man's eye.

"He IS meant to find something. But it's not there yet. I have to put it there... I have it in my... something in my tactical vest back on Gina's island. I came through with it. He needs to find it... how can I know this? How can I possibly know this? It's crazy... of all the things scheduled to happen in this year... how can I possibly know this?"

Something painful flashed into his mind and he felt blackness creep around the edges and he moved to the wall to grip it for support. He felt, rather than saw the general move out of his chair and come in behind and felt his fear of touching him. An electricity crackled from him and the blackness moved up and became all encompassing.. He struggled to maintain control, but control was gone and he was no longer here, but there and saw clearly the stones, the glowing purple light and the moment when he was pulled into them. What then had been blackness until the moment he woke up disorentiated on that beach, suddenly became clarity.

He saw a giant television screen behind his eyes, the stones, backwards, through time – he saw the astronaut landing in the water, the fireball as part of his ship came down on top of him, the nation mourning his death, the cancellation of the Gemini mission... spaceflight no more... He saw the device in this hand, saw it falling into the water, watched as the astronaut, curiously, picked it out of the water as he landed, seconds before his exploding craft came down. Saw the protective shield activate, the future, now secure. Not changed, but as it was meant to be.

"John... are you all right? I think you need to sit down for a moment... you are scaring me..." Gina attempted to place a hand on his arm to calm his and he whirled away, that maniacal gleam in his eye a tangible thing that sent sparks across the room.

"This is going to sound crazy – insane. I carry a device in my tactical vest. I have never used it, it's like a talisman, something I carry for luck more than anything – and have chosen never to use it. It is a personal shield, something designed by the ancients and can only be activated by one person – and once it is activated it can only ever be used by that one person. I have never used it, therefore it has never been activated... oh my god! Do you understand! No, damn it – how could you possible understand this? Hell, I barely understand it. I just know..." The rasp of his beard as his hands were dragged roughly down his face.

"Walter, the astronaut – he dies on that mission, when he lands in the water – he dies! And because he dies, so much is missing from the space programme and there is something important, an integral part that does not get done... the stargate is not activated... far reaching more than you can ever know. It worked, my future, my present BECAUSE I was sent back. It has already happened. Whatever I did worked and he lived, went on to be a part of those three missions and so forth and so forth... ripples, ever expanding and the universe was as it was meant to be."

He ran out of steam now, simply collapsed in his chair and Gina placed a hand on his shoulder. He leaned into it, briefly closing his eyes before opening them again quickly. "If I don't put this personal device into the water where he will find it, he will die and the world as I know it, will not be... how do I know this? The same way I managed to come back here to stop it... genetic memory I guess and something far more powerful that I could never attempt to explain..."


	14. Chapter 14 Rodney's Conclusion

CHAPTER 14 – RODNEY'S CONCLUSION

Rodney had indeed come to the same conclusion that John had. The stone portal would only activate if used or in the vicinity of someone with the ancient gene. Make that strong ancient gene. Rodney had gathered his team of scientists, lots of coffee, plenty of food and all the equipment he could think of and having brought Ronon back with him for the sole purpose of building an extremely large and extremely hot fire, he now stood ponderingly in front of the stone portal, at this stage - not really any closer to establishing just where in the hell, or where in the damn universe, Colonel John Sheppard had gone.

Zelenka was with him and busy feeding information at Rodney's request into his hand held computer. "Colonel Sheppard has the highest concentration of ATA gene in Atlantis Rodney, you know this. In order to simulate the same conditions as when he left to ... wherever... we need the same strength gene."

"Damn it, I know that Zelenka. I'm working on the gene strength now. I have to be precise. I think it was activiated because of his precise strength and I have a really bad feeling..."

Ronon stood nearby. He had refused to go back to Atlantis until John was found, and if his only task was to keep the fire roaring to shut Rodney's constant moaning about the cold up, then he would do it. But that didn't mean he had to like it. He continued to stare broodingly at the scientists and more than once Rodney had caught his eye. "Ronon, do you have to do that. You make me damned uncomfortable... staring like that. Can't you find - something to do? Anything. Just stop with the staring! It's not going to get the job done any quicker. In fact, my fingers are fumbling more just because I know you're watching. Go for a run for something - get rid of some of that energy."

"Can't Rodney. Until I know he's safe, I'll stay right here. So just do your damn job and stop whining..." Rodney cast one more aggrieved look his way then decided to shut up. Likely he'd pushed his luck as far as it was going to take him.

"I've got John's concentration here, all our levels are stored in the data base, but it's tricky. I need to ideally, use someone who has the nearest level and that would be Carson. But no point sending him through it - we need someone with the ability to try and get back - and we need someone on this end with the same ability, in case it all goes to hell in a handbasket."

"It would help Rodney, if we had any idea where this device took him.." Zelenka stopped what he was doing a moment to slant a look at Rodney.

"I'm getting a bad feeling about that... I think it is a time portal, I think it is one of the ancients fail safe devices that they loved to hide around the galaxy. It was likely designed to send someone back for a specific reason to either stop or start something so that our present could exist as it was meant to exist."

"That sounds a bit out there Rodney, for you?" Zelenka had paused again in his calculations to look at Rodney. "Did you find some sort of information about a time portal in the ancient data base?"

"There is mention of them Zelenka... but not where. Just that they were placed at certain points around the galaxy and have been placed there for specific reasons. You know how damn cagey these ancients can be when they want to keep their true intent hidden...When I get near it, I pick up something, remnants of history or tendrils of what has happened. Like a memory chip, but faded. I've been picking it up for the past hour and trying to piece together what it means. I think John was the one who had to go back - in time, likely somewhere on earth to stop something. He was chosen because of the concentration of his gene."

Ronon looked confused. "I don't get the whole time travel thing, so don't even try to explain it to me, but can he come back?"

"I would have to assume that if the ancients built this device for that purpose, then they built in the means for him to come back." Rodney's tone had developed that smugly superior quality that often made people want to hit him and Ronon's fist was beginning to itch about now.

"But would Sheppard be able to figure it out?" Ronon was pacing now. "Without you there to figure it out for him?"

"Well that Ronon, is the question I have been asking myself and come to the conclusion that I need to go there... to help him come back."

"If you're going McKay, I'm going with you."

"Brains and brawn... ok Ronon, I'll buy that. But it'll mean shooting you up with some ancient gene therapy - as soon as I get the concentration calculations perfect - myself also - I will need to increase my own concentration. And hope to hell that this theory I've come up with works." Rodney grimaced. He preferred to work in exact science, not some of the incomplete and often theoretical work that the ancients sometimes left for him to decipher.

"Not like you to doubt yourself Rodney" Zelenka looked curiously at Rodney.

"Not so much doubtful, just a little wary about where the information came from. If I'd come to it through scientific means, no problem with the whole trust thing - through less tangible means, such as vibrations and imprints - a little harder to put trust in this, especially for a scientist."

" Give me the gene therapy Rodney. Let's go get our boy." Ronon looked slightly relieved that they would finally be doing something.

"Let me get the therapy right and you'll be the first to get the needle. A word of advice Ronon? Likely we're going back in time. On earth. Lose your Satedan clothing. Find something decade generic such as jeans and a tshirt so that at least we have some show of fitting into whereever it is or whenever it is we end up."

He radioed Atlantis. "Elizabeth, I'm ready. I think I've figured it out..." She cut him off with a comment. "Yes Elizabeth, 'think' - no, I'm not sure. Working with ancient devices here...anyway - may I finish? I think it is a time portal and I also think, and this is a rather off the cuff theory given how I came about it - I think that Sheppard's gene activated it and he was sent back, likely to earth in another timeline to perform a specific task. No Elizabeth, I prefer not to explain exactly how I came across this particular theory. In summary? I will give Ronon and myself the required gene therapy to bring us up to the same concentration as Sheppard and try to go back to wherever he is.."

He looked bored now, waving his hands in the air, mimicking Elizabeth as she likely began a rant in his ear, and Ronon managed a small smile. He could quite imagine the squawking that was going on at the other end and was glad that he was not the recipient. "Yes Elizabeth, Zelenka will remain here to try and get us all back. He has all the necessary data and calculations. No Elizabeth, if we wait we may be too late. No, there's not much point telling us not to go - Ronon here is champing at thebit and he'll just ignore whatever you say and do it anyway."

He listened impatiently for a short while longer rolling his eyes at Ronon now. As soon as he shut the radio off he gestured that they could leave. "Let's go find us some gene therapy Ronon, and hope to hell that thing takes us to the same place as Sheppard, or we're well and truly screwed."

Ronon's forbidding scare did not manage to scare him as much as the thought of floating around in time without a paddle... some things were just plain frightening.


	15. Chapter 15 An Ancient Memory

CHAPTER 15 AN ANCIENT MEMORY

The general had business to attend to so he sent John and Gina off for a walk around the city. John was exhausted and Gina held onto his arm, trying to support him a little, both mentally and physically.

"My head's in a strange place right now Gina. Part of me is here, and part of me is _there_, and there's another part that knows exactly what I have to do, and that scares the crap out of me. How can I know that? Where the hell does that genetic knowledge come from? Has it already happened? If this is doing me in, you're the calmest person I know... you look at me with those beautiful blue eyes that see everything, inside and outside and all I want to do is drown in them right now. Aaah hell Gina..."

She stopped in the street then, oblivious to traffic and people, noise and and the going's on of a city that had no idea what was currently taking place in it's future, in it's present. She wrapped her arms and around him, pulling herself tightly against him and it was with a sense of relief that he dropped his chin on top of her head, smelling her coconut and tropical fruit shampoo and let some of his worries, and all of his angst, for just a few moments... out.

"I know why the ancients chose you to come back John. You're the bravest person I know. Really. You stand here on the brink of doing something so amazing, and so incredible and you show no arrogance, just a humble philosophy that this is what you are meant to do. You have inside you the knowledge to keep your future, your present as it is supposed to be and with no regard for your own life, you do this task that has been given to you without really understanding why it falls on your shoulders. And I stand here in your arms and wish I could be so much more... with you... in your time."

The noise of the city continued around them, and they attracted curious glances from many people, some even felt a tiny sliver of unease as they walked past John. A tiny remnant of ancient gene that perhaps travelled through the bodies of some of these people, reacted to the situation that this traveller from the future had found himself in. As he stood there and let this time wrap itself around him, just as he allowed the woman in his arms to do the same, he reached out once more to make that connection with the portal, to make his direction that much clearer.

The blackness spiralled again... and this time he saw the device, the personal shield. He had been right. It was there all along and as his mind shot through that dark tunnel and the pictures bombarded him from all sides, he saw the device, saw it falling into the water and saw the astronaut take it. The process had been written fifty years in the future and the game would be played out fifty years in the past. He felt Gina tugging on his arm and forcibly pulled himself out of the mire and lightly kissed her to push away the demons that still hovered just over his shoulder. He caught the eye of one man who walked past him and felt the shudder of recognition, felt the moment when one gene recognised another and saw him falter, look quickly at John, then look away. John kept his eye on him, taking in his posture, way of walking and the angle of his head. That familiar flutter as recognition grew, then drifted away. Genetic memory at play again? Or something more. Paradox.

He pulled Gina down the street, something ancient driving him now. "Lets get out of here sweetheart. I need normal. I need to feel not like a man possessed. Show me your home, show me your island.." He looked down at her, pushing away the future to concentrate onthe past.

"Wanna go sightseeing John?" Her face held a devilish twinkle. "There's real magic here in Hawaii also and in _this_ time, and I'll take you to see it. There's also someone I want you to meet, someone special to me - but we won't be able to tell her who you are. I'll telephone my father first, and tell him - enough! The rest of this day is for us..."

She found a couple of bicycles that they could use, and tossing them into the back of her boat they left the bustling city of Honolulu and crossed the water, to a another island near her own one. This one had paved trails and small settlements, however was not developed for the tourists yet as it would be in the future. They unloaded the bikes and laughing a little - it had afterall, been some time since John had ridden a bike, they slowly rode through the paved trails, amongst brilliant flowers, glossy green foliage and felt, always, the heat of the afternoon sun that fell sensually upon them. John paused at one point to remove his shirt, knotting it around the handle bars of the bike and her eyes darkened as she took in his sweat gleaming body with hard muscles and caught the amusement in his eyes when he caught her looking. Then knotting her own shirt high under her breastbone and watched as his own eyes drifted to her tanned midriff... and smiled. Their little game of sexual teasing had begun.

The heat became overbearing when at last she stopped at a cottage that literally was framed with the gem like colours of island flowers. It was stunning and the aromas from the tropical flowers made her senses sing. This was why she had chosen this place to live. She knocked on the door of the cottage and when it opened John felt a punch in the gut. The woman who stared out at him was tall with shoulder length blonde hair and blue eyes. She had fair skin, still pale even living in a climate such as Hawaii and when she looked at him with those clear blue eyes, he knew her. He took her hand gently and listened as the introductions were made.

"John, this is my mentor - Dr Jennifer Carter - she is the one who encouraged me to get my physics degree, a brilliant scientist and an even more amazing woman. Aunt Jen - this is a friend, visiting from the mainland. Colonel John Sheppard."

Her keen eyes assessed him. "Airforce, young man? A pilot I imagine. You have the bearing of a pilot. My son, Jacob, is a lieutenant stationed in Florida. Hoping to get into the astronaut programme."

John froze in shock "Jacob Carter?"

"You know him Colonel?" Her eyes seemed to see too much and John felt himself pale. He was standing in front of Samantha Carter's grandmother. Paradox or genetic memory. Whose game was he playing now? His own,or that predestined one that drove him through this universe.

"I haven't had the pleasure m'am - but I've heard good things about him. If he wants to take a run at NASA, tell him to keep at it - I hear it's the place to be at the moment. All the action is going to be up there!" He pushed his gaze skyward, feeling just a little naughty and he saw something in her eyes that seemed to understand.

"I'm sure you're right Colonel." That blue eyes seemed to linger a while longer on him,then she smiled and turned to invite them into the cottage for refreshments. He grabbed Gina's arm just as they walked in.

"You called her Aunt Jen - please tell me that this is just a term of endearment..."

Her eyes were wide as she looked at him. "She's my father's sister John - why?"

"Aaah hell... I've just had sex with Samantha Carter's second cousin... that is, if I got those damn family ties right..."

"Who the hell is Samantha Carter?" Gina stared at him with puzzled eyes.

" Oh baby, that's a long story and one I shall enjoy filling you in on, just a little... but not too much. Most of it you'll have to discover for yourself, suffice to say, you have a family who will go on to do great things. So, many great things..."

She laughingly pulled on his hand. "You have to tell me.. don't leave me hanging..."

He bent and murmured into her ear. "I'll not leave you hanging babe, never fear. I always finish what I started..." Her giggle was just a little bit naughty and drew a knowing look from Aunt Jen as they followed her through to the small dining area. She motioned them through the back of the house to the shaded area outside where a small picnic table was set up and asked John to help her in the kitchen. She caught his eye and held it and felt something shift between them, and releasing Gina's hand , he followed her into the kitchen, leaving Gina to continue outside. She kept silent for a few moments, then turned those blue eyes on him, reminding him so much of Sam that his breath hitched and she smiled.

"I remind you of her, don't I?" He looked at her in shock.

"Who? Gina?"

"No John, Sam... you see Sam in me, don't you."

He grabbed the bench for support and took a deep breath. "Sam hasn't been born yet..."

"I know that John. I know what you know and a little bit more. You see John, I'm not just Jennifer Carter... we share something else... " she touched him then and an electrical current shot between them with alarming speed causing him to yelp in surprise.

"Jesus... sorry, m'am, but crap! What was that?"

"Our ancient gene connection. Do you know who I am John? I came from Atlantis 10,000 years in your past, here to earth to help seed a new colony of ancients. I am Callandra and I chose to move through the generations, helping each one reach their potential and ensure that the future follows the path that has been predestined. The time portal sent you back here to help that astronaut survive. If he didn't then there would be many repercussions down the line... the space programme would be postponed, Sam would not join NASA, would not help uncover the mystery of the stargate... do you see now? Do you understand now, why you are here to do what you do?"

" If you know all this ... why did you just not save him yourself?"

" There are parts John, roles and we all must play them. I cannot take your role, just as you cannot take mine. Your gene is strong, the strongest of my kind that I have seen after the dilution. It makes me proud to stand alongside you and know that our legacy has brought us to this point. Come John, my niece will be getting worried..."

He tugged gently on her arm. "Does she know any of this, Jen?"

" No, only what you have told her, that knowledge I have seen in her eyes. There is something else, but I cannot tell you this yet... soon. Come, let us go through to the back. And John? You made the right choice.. one night will never just be that... you knew that then, and you know that now."

He nodded, felt that overwhelming sense of relief. Some way, some how. It would be right.


	16. Chapter 16 Waterfalls and Magic

CHAPTER 16 WATERFALLS AND MAGIC

He sat in the shade of the beautiful Hawaiian garden and watched the play of emotions across Gina's face. Watched the easy friendship the two women shared, the touches as they shared a small joke and the way her eyes would shift and stroke him, just a little. Then he would catch the soft glances that Jennifer sent his way. Callandra, he told himself. That ancient from so long ago who even now was keeping a watch over the humans of this galaxy to make sure that the rules were kept and that things progressed as they should.

He felt a myriad of emotions himself at this point. Looking at her and sensing all that she knew, and knew also, that she had chosen to keep certain things hidden. How must it feel to go through ones life with the weight of two galaxies and two races of people upon your shoulders? Yet, she had a serene expression on her face and as she caught his eye from time to time, he saw Sam, with whom he had an excellent professional relationship and admired her both as a scientist and as a pilot. Hell, as a pilot she kicked some serious ass - his included! She deliberately didn't ask him questions and he knew that Gina was a little surprised by this, so he joined in the conversation offering anecdotes of his own, random and inconsequential so that Gina relaxed a little. Then the heat began to get to them and he saw Gina's eyes become a little sleepy and he stood then, not wanting to appear rude, but needing himself, to get out of the heat.

She pushed against him, tired but wanting to show him one more thing before returning to the island. "You'll show him the falls Gina?" Jennifer smiled at her niece as she ushered them out the door and gave John a shadowed look as they left.

"The falls sound wonderful, the water is cool and very very private..." John found himself blushing a little at the implication that was being made in the presence of her aunt, hell in the presence of an ancient ascended being and ducked his head a little to their laughter.

"I think you'll find it ... interesting John. There are some special properties in the falls, one would almost say... magical..." and she winked at him them and wouldn't say more and he left wondering just what the hell he was getting himself into.

She wobbled a little on her bike now, tired and ready for a swim and he stayed behind her a little just in case she fell. They were not far and throwing her bike unceremoniously into the bushes, she shucked out of her clothes before he had even had a chance to dismount and was gleefully flinging herself into the cool waters, a cry of happiness as she felt that first rush of water as it tumbled over her head.

"Hurry John... Aunt Jen is right... these are magic!" He needed no further urging, and for the second time that day found himself naked in the water and laughed at the sheer absurdity of it all. The water was pure heaven. Cold, almost freezing , in contrast to the intense heat of the day and had a zing that tingled across his skin and sent a bubbling awareness all the way down to the tips of his toes. She moved closer.

"Do you feel it?" Her eyes looked sleepily up at him.

"Feel what, you little minx... this water is freezing.. likely everything's dropped off..."

"Not everything..." and her grin was wicked as she reached down and grasped his rather prominent appendix which had managed not to shrivel in the cold of the water. In fact it appeared to have developed a life of it's own under the minstrations of her rather nimble and extremely welcome fingers. He moved closer and his own hands went around to cup her bottom and pull her tight against him, her skin like silk as it rubbed sensually against his. With one finger he traced down the length of her spine, sending shivers along her length and these shivers electrocuted him into instant awareness and opened his mind as his senses became overloaded. He wanted to stand like that forever - the cold water almost numbing except for the throbbing heat of his penis and the hot centre of her that he now plunged a questing finger into. Ice and fire.

The heat of the sun beat down on his shoulders and glinted like diamonds off the top of the water and he had to blink, for a moment imagining another time that had suddenly superimposed itself over the time he was in. Then blinked again, and the waterfall had changed slightly, the rock structure around the edge was different, worn smooth by time and the foliage that came almost down to the waters edge was thicker and more intense than when they had arrived. He looked sharply at Gina but she had not appeared to notice. Her mouth was busy running hot kisses along his collarbone and the sensations almost overwhelmed him. Here or there? Now or then? Gina. Her hands, her mouth.

And fell head first into the abyss as she wrapped her legs around his waist and clung to him, bringing her most intimate centre in instant contact with his manhood that stood to attention, and ready to play. "Magic..." he growled into her mouth just before he kissed her hungrily. "What sort of magic weaves it's spell over this place... hmmm?" He deepened the kiss, hungrier now than he could recall ever being, and saw the hazy shift in time again, as the stage changed yet again. _But the players are still the same _argued John_ it is just the here that changes.. we are still the same people, still creating the same sensations in one another... and hell, I want her so much._

She shifted herself slightly then and she felt the tip of his penis probe her warmth, her heat and she sighed before letting him grip her hips to make the connection complete. He closed his eyes, letting the heat, the magic and the shifts in time wash over him, then opening his eyes saw that she had thrown her head back and was nearly at her climax. He watched her face, transparent and so lovely and waited until she cried out, his name on her tongue – then he changed the rhythm so that she began that delicious climb up to the peak again.

"Magic... what magic is here Gina?" He panted this out, nearing his own release, but needing to know. "There is more than one generation here, watching us, making sure that this happens. Do you feel them Gina?"

"Ghosts John? You see ghosts? … aaahhhhh... she breathed out in one exhale as another ripple shot through her and he could hold back no longer, his own release loud and hot and extremely strong as he felt the rifts in time ripple around him.

His breathing gradually quietened and he carried her, still imbedded in her warmth, to the rocks surrounding the waterfall. "Ghosts... maybe sweetheart. There is something here. And whoever just witnessed that, certainly approved. You spoke before of fate? Perhaps fate is a part of our lives, perhaps we were supposed to meet in this way, in this time." He dropped his eyes, bowing his head slightly and she had to lift his chin to see the expression on his face.

"What is it John? You came to do what was needed? You doubt yourself now?"

"No sweetheart, I don't doubt myself... I doubt my ability to leave you..." In an abrupt change of subject his face hardened slightly. "Tell me about him Gina – the one who hurt you?"

Her own face shuttered a little. "Why do you want to know about him? What can that bring you? It surely won't bring me any peace to talk about it, and bring it all into the open again."

"I know Gina and I'm sorry about that, but I need to know. If I'm to understand you, I need to know the circumstances that led you to me, and his treatment of you was one of those circumstances – hell, it was probably the main reason!"

He put her down gently and ran his hands up her back, putting a little warmth into her chilled skin as he saw the goosebumps begin to blossom. She pulled away from him and went to stand a little distance away, her back to him now and facing the falls.

"It's still an open wound John, just so you know..." As if making a decision she spun around. "He beat me – ok? By day he flew fighter jets out of Hickam, made polite talk with my father who though the sun shone out of his backside, sat around during the weekend drinking beer with my brother, then by night... he would beat me, then apologise and make love to me. So John, I was turned around, all the time. I knew what he did was wrong, but when he apologised, he was so gentle and so loving after, I tried to tell myself each time that it wouldn't happen again, that this time he would change..."

John reached her side and gently ran a hand down her hair. "But it didn't... the promises meant nothing, did they?"

"No John, it got worse if anything. Then one weekend he snapped in front of my father, at a family picnic, hit me hard enough to drop me to the ground. I never saw my brother or father move so fast. He was history after that. They made me tell them everything, humiliating moment, by humiliating moment. I was stripped bare, photos taken of my bruising, I had two broken ribs that had refused to heal... I was a fool John... and I swore during that trial, that I would never trust a man again..."

John's hand continued to stroke down her hair. "And along comes a man from the future, promising nothing but one night... why'd you do that Gina? Why'd you take something that could cause you more pain?" He needed to know what her reasons were behind that one night.

"Because I knew John. I knew that one night with you would be better than no nights at all..."

And as her tears fell he held her tightly, cursing the man who had taken her innocence and wishing he could break every bone in his body.

_I need to speak to Callandra... I won't give her up..._


	17. Chapter 17 The Portal Opens Again

CHAPTER 17 – THE PORTAL OPENS AGAIN

There was a cooler breeze coming off the ocean as they made their way back to the island, Gina's island. She had been quiet on the trip back and he knew it was not just tiredness that silenced her. He had insisted she air her demons, and she had. But at what cost? Had she not faced them enough already? _Selfish John... why did you insist that she tell you about him? Did you need to put her through it all again? For what? _

The docked and he helped her pull the boat to a safe position. The wind had picked up even more and clouds now skudded across the sky. John smelled rain in the air and looking back out to sea, it looked as though a storm was on it's way. The humidity had been building up all afternoon.

The moved across the sand and John picked up the surfboard that had been left there this morning and intended doing a thorough sweep of the area to ensure that everything was locked down tight. He knew that these island storms could be brutal and sweep away anything that wasn't tied down securely.

There was a crack of thunder overhead and lightning forked across the sky and within seconds the heavens opened and it began to pour. Gina stood there immobile, and simply turned her face up to catch the raindrops that began to heave down upon them. "Gina... get inside. You'll be soaked through!" She didn't acknowledge his voice against the noise of the storm and he moved up behind her, gripping her arm to get her attention. "Gina! You can't just stand out here in the rain – go!"

There was another crack of thunder, then John saw a flash of purple light that came from the edge of the sand area, the same part of the beach where he had awoken two days ago. "Gina – look! The portal... I think it's opening again! Come on!"

She heard him then and turning a soaked face in his direction, she allowed him to take her hand and move quickly up the beach, now having to battle slightly against the driving wind and rain. The purple light began to glow more until it encompassed a large area of the beach. This is how it must have looked the night he came through and no one had been awake to see it. He had simply stayed on the sand where he had fallen until morning and the natural light and feel of the sun had eventually woken him.

"John? Is it happening again? Is someone from your time coming through to find you?" He gripped her hand tightly.

"I don't know Gina. Don't get too close – if this is a two way portal then you don't want to get sucked into it. Stay back here, with me. Wait to see if anything comes through." He pulled her back against him, their clothes plastered against them, blinking rapidly at the rain that threatened their vision.

He felt his eyes begin to tear with the strain on keeping them trained on the purple light. It continued to pulse and then finally shut down with a hiss of static electricity. The night was dark again, punctuated only by the occasional fork of lightning that streaked through the sky. Gripping her hand he moved closer, now able to see that two distinct shapes had been left on the sand in the wake of the purple light shutting down. There was no movement, no sound and John cursed the fact that he had no flashlight on him. Not wanting to startle the two shapes on the beach, he crouched down a reasonably close distance to them, but not so close that he would be in hitting distance if they were foes and not friends that had come through.

He immediately recognised the big Satedan, saw his long dreadlocked hair splayed out across the sand and grinned a little when he saw that Ronon wore jeans. Obviously Rodney had told him that his normal attire would not be suitable for a visit to earth. Taking a careful look at the second body, John nodded to himself. Yep, that was Rodney. Nosy little scientist couldn't resist the trip back through time. He felt a sudden surge of relief. They had found a way to come back for him, which would mean that Rodney must have discovered his purpose for coming here and knew a way for them all to get back. Then relief bottomed out. He would have to leave Gina. _Not gonna happen..._ John pushed the thought away. It had to happen, ripples, paradoxes and all that crap. No question about it. It had to happen.

"Rodney! You arrive on earth fifty years in the past and all you want to do is sleep? Get up you lazy scientist. Whose the hell is rescuing who?"

Rodney groaned and it was Ronon who leaped to his feet, face registered instant wariness in the darkening of the storm before he realised that it was Sheppard who stood before them. His face broke into a grin and he was bouncing towards the smaller man, picking him up like a rag doll and nearly shattering all the bones in his body to hug him. "Damn Sheppard, it's good to see you!"

"Yeah Ronon, back atcha... but could you...aah, put me down. Ribs about to crack... aaah thank you.!

Rodney rolled to his feet making ineffectual motions to keep the rain from battering his face. "Sheppard? That you? Did we make it?"

"Yes you did Rodney. I hope you brought the means to get us all home. Not that I'm not pleased to see you... but I'd hate to think we were all trapped here now?"

Gina now clung to John's soaked arm and pulled slightly. "Can we continue this indoors John? The storm's getting worse and we need to get out of this wet clothing."

Gina put the kettle on to boil, a pot of soup on the stove to simmer, directed John to grab as many dry towels as he could and started making a large plate of sandwiches. It was Ronon's dark glance that followed her around the kitchen as she worked and more than once she looked up to find him staring at her. Eventually, she stopped what she was doing, planted her feet in the middle of her kitchen with her hands on her hips, a slightly grumpy expression on her face and said _"what?"_

Ronon just looked at her. Gina all but stamped her feet. "You've been staring at me like some sulky child who lost his favourite toy. What is wrong? If you want to know something, damn well ask me. Don't just stare at me. It's rude and disconcerting."

John walked in then, having just had a shower and was drying his hair off. Catching the end of her conversation he laughed. "Ronon's the strong silent type. He doesn't say much. But Ronon, play nice with the lady. She's been my lifeline since I've been here... and then some..." His gaze heated as it slid over her and Ronon's gaze sharpening, switching quickly from Gina to John.

"We need to talk Sheppard!"

"That we do Ronon. We'll wait until Rodney's done in the shower and we'll sit and enjoy the food that this wonderful lady has prepared for us, and then we'll talk. There's nothing you can't say in front of her – I had to come clean so to speak. Her father is a general in the airforce... and there are some other things, that have come to light... oh yeah, lot's to tell you big guy!"

Rodney's enthusiasm returned in spades when he saw the spread that Gina had arranged for them, and with his first genuine smile since he had arrived in this time line, sat down and began devouring the food, trying to talk as sandwich after sandwich disappeared into his mouth. John flashed a derisive smile at Gina. "You'll have to excuse my rather rude friend Gina. Eating is a favourite past time of his and I'm sure in his food starved mind, he has no doubt rationalised that he hasn't eaten for fifty years..."

Rodney spat out the mouthful of sandwich. "Fifty years Sheppard? That's how far back this took us?"

"Yup! Fifty years Rodney. No comments from you big guy? In fact Ronon, you've been quiet, even for you..."

"I'm worried Sheppard. You look too calm. I expected you to be a little more... pissed... when we arrived."

"Ok boys, time for the story, and it's a doozy..." John steepled his fingers and began from his arrival on the beach two days ago, stopping now and again to answer questions from Rodney and feeling all the while, Ronon's dark gaze that first raked his own face, then lingered on Gina's. The big guy missed very little.

"So in the veritible nutshell boys. Save the astronaut, save the space programme, let Sam Carter do her thing with the stargate... and all is right in our little corner of the time line."

Rodney's glance took in Gina. "So, Samantha Carter's cousin... my Sam? Wow – I'm not usually at a loss for words – just ask Sheppard here, but wow! That is some thought provoking stuff, really. Sam? Wow. And Sheppard? You haven't done anything here, interacted with the wrong people – so as to mess with the time line...please tell me you haven't..." He threw a meaningful look at Gina this time.

_Unprotected sex? I guess that counts as interacting and messing with the time line... God, what if she's pregnant? That would pretty much screw things right away... but there's something I'm missing... Jen/Callandra knew about us... there were no warnings, she knows what is happening is not going to change anything... and she knows something about Gina that she hasn't told me yet – or Gina... _

"I've told a few things to people who now have a bit of advance warning of things to come, but nothing that could invoke anyone to do anything beyond what they would normally. Gina's dad had heard whispers about the stargate programme – it's being researched now as we speak, so I didn't open any can of worms there. Gina's aunt, that was the scary bit..."

Gina looked at him sharply. "She told you something, didn't she? You were alone in the kitchen with her for too long, and I saw the look in her eye when she saw you. She knew you. And there are things about her that didn't seem right as I was growing up. She was careful always, to watch what she said and did, but sometimes little things would slip... little comments that made me think that she had a pyschic ability, could see into the future. But it's more than that isn't it?"

"I can't tell you your aunt's secret – that's hers alone to tell you. But I do know that she's keeping something important from me, something that affects what I do here. I'm going to see her again tomorrow, I need to know everything she can tell me if I am to complete this job and do it right. I suggest you pin her down and make her tell you – she knows that you can handle whatever she throws at you... perhaps she just needed the right moment."

He turned to Rodney now. "You didn't answer my question Rodney. Do you or do you not have the means to get us home...?"

Rodney turned a not so delicate shade of red. "Ah! About that Sheppard..."

"I'm guessing that means 'no'... Rodney!"

"Damn it Sheppard! I had Ronon breathing down my neck just to get us here. There was no way he was going to wait for me to find out whether it was a two way tunnel or not. Besides, I figured you'd have the answer by the time we got here... have you?" This last bit was said somewhat hopefully.

"You're lucky Rodney – I don't have the answer, but I'm pretty sure I know who does and it seems that everything we do here – now – is predestined, which means there's a way home. Tomorrow we talk to Jennifer Carter. I'm sure she'll shed some illuminating thoughts over all of this. For all of us..." This last was said with a sharp look at Gina.


	18. Chapter 18 Repercussions

CHAPTER 18 – REPERCUSSIONS

The storm had abated sometime during the night and John and Ronon stood on the rain washed sand looking out at a now calm sea, watching as yet another sunrise pearled it's fingers over the horizon to start this new day. They had talked through most of the night while Rodney snored on the couch in the lounge and Gina had rubbed his shoulder and smiled – then gone to the bed alone.

Ronon looked at him now. "You sure you know what you're doing John?" John knew what he talked about, and knew who he meant. He had seen the touches they shared and seen the open look in her eyes when she had looked at John. And seen also, how his friend had not even attempted to hide the passion in his own.

"I haven't been really certain of anything since I woke up on this damn beach... too many variables, too many scenarios. The one playing out right now? I have to assume it's the right one. I couldn't say much last night... but Gina's Aunt Jennifer? Not just Sam's grandmother... she's an ancient Ronon – Callandra. She's the damn monkey that's been sitting on my shoulders since I arrived – the one's that led me to the conclusions I have. Face it, I didn't get there myself. Not with complicated scenarios such as the ones at play here. She's been my guide and she's here to make sure I don't make the wrong choices. Because Ronon, I suspect that if I did, she'd come down on me like a ton of bricks so fast, my head would spin. So I gotta figure... whatever this is between me and Gina. That's meant to be – too. She wouldn't let me get involved with her niece if she knew that anyone was gonna get hurt."

Ronon kicked in the sand, then turned his gaze back out to watch the rise rising over the brilliant waters. "I'm trying John, to process all this crap you've told us. You know me. I like it simple. This is ...not."

"No Ronon, it's not. It's probably the most damn complicated play in the history of football. A hail mary, if I can pull it off. The sucker punch is? I must have already pulled it off...or I wouldn't be here. Or Atlantis wouldn't be there... aaah... crap. It makes my head hurt!"

"Hey Sheppard...?"

"Yeah, Ronon?..."

"Remember you told me once you were gonna teach me how to surf?"

John felt the beginnings of a grin as he turned to face his friend. "You thinking that time could be now?"

"Seems like we're here for a reason... that's a reason as far as I can see..."

John was laughing now. "Somehow I don't think the ancients manoevered me the hell back here fifty years to teach you to surf... but hey? I'm game. Let's do it!"

Ten minutes later two laughing friends were out at the breaker line, John painstakingly trying to explain the more obvious points on how to catch a wave. Ronon was not so good at listening. He was a doer. And when the next wave came through, he did just that. Simply paddled along with the swell as it started to build, and with an inner knowledge simply pushed himself to his feet and let out a wild cry of delight. John's own laughter rumbled out. These moments were rare and precious. Friendship, bonding and a sense that everything was right in the universe. Perhaps this was one of the reasons they were here. Never look a gift horse in the mouth. And with that sweet analogy on his lips, he too, rose like a magestic water warrior to ride the next wave into shore, catching a grin from Ronon as he began the paddle back out.

_Yeah... repercussions...like waves that break relentlessly onto the shore. Like the love of a woman who stood now, at the window of her cottage and looked out at the sunrise that tipped magestically over the water and thought of the man who now held her heart firmly near his own. Like the ripple in time that shattered slightly when one thing was changed..._


	19. Chapter 19 The Truth Beneath the Pain

CHAPTER 19 - THE TRUTH BENEATH THE PAIN

They arrived on Jennifer's island later that morning. Rodney, it appeared, got seasick and spent most of the short trip leaning over the side of the boat bringing up the rather large breakfast that he had managed to consume. He groaned theatrically and complained loudly that he could smell lemons, citrus - that the air was filled with the spores of citrus and all manner of pollen that would cause his hayfever and many other allergies to flare up. Ronon grabbed him around the shoulders, gripping hard. "Will you just shut up Rodney or I'll throw you overboard. Then a shark will get you. No more Rodney, no more complaining, no more seasick. I'm thinking that it must be pretty quiet in Atlantis about now..."

Rodney managed an aggrieved look at Ronon and glared at the chuckle that escaped from John. Only Gina seemed to show him any sympathy. Giving John a censured look, she told him to take the controls of the boat and went to at least attempt to show Rodney some degree of sympathy. He certainly did not appear to be getting any from his friends. "Rodney - it helps if you keep your head up and don't look down at the water. Keep your focus out onto the horizon. Take deep breaths." She rubbed his back soothingly and he gave her a grateful look while John at the controls just rolled his eyes.

Jennifer and Gina's father were waiting at the dock when they arrived. The general stood tall and proud, not in uniform today, but in casual beach style pants that in no way took away his obvious bearing. Jennifer wore a pretty summer dress and she watched carefully as the other people from Atlantis alighted from the boat, paying particular attention to Rodney. His colour returned as soon as he had his feet firmly back on land.

"Doctor Rodney McKay and Ronon Dex of Sateda. An honour to meet you both." Jennifer stepped forward to greet the new arrivals and both the general and Gina looked at her in shock. She gave a small smile. "It is time for confessions my dear brother.. and to you too Gina. I am not quite the person you thought me to be... come... walk to the house. We will talk along the way."

She tucked Gina's hand into her elbow and glancing up occasionally at her brother she told her story. The general's face had paled a little and he paused at one point to rest his hands on his knees and to bend slightly as thought getting breath had become a difficulty. John was beside him immediately, concern in his face. "Take a moment General. It's a lot to take in. A lot. You've just been told your sister is an ascended being, without even understanding the concept of ascention or it's role in their society or yours. I can't begin to comprehend how this all must seem to you. A military man, trained to think a certain way. Trained to keep the enemy from the door. Who is the enemy?"

He had gotten his breath back. His glance at John was sharp, and just a little wary. "Who indeed, Colonel...who indeed? It seems as though everything I have held to be true has been taken away, turned around and changed in some way form or other. It is mind boggling to say the least. And yet, there is a part of me that accepts... and this feels wrong. I shouldn't accept. I should treat you all, my sister included, with suspicion. My mandate would dictate this. Know thy enemy? Perhaps, but perhaps we live amongst our enemies." He stopped again and waited until Jennifer had stopped also.

My late wife - you were close to her. Did she know?"

"No Nate. She did not know who I was or what Gina would become..." She deliberately left the sentence hanging, waiting for it to be picked up by the others. There was one very important piece of information that she needed to impart. This involved her changing the course of the future, interfering - yes, but necessary interfering. If things were meant to be as they should. Her role here was to observe and to guide and interference had always been strictly frowned upon. But this was one such time when if she did not interfere, then the future would collapse a little. This was her justification and she hoped that there would not be consequences because of what she was about to do.

"Gina, Nate... I have some news that will shock you. More than what I have already told you. You too John,this affects you and what you must do." They had reached her cottage now and she sank down gracefully onto the grass in the front, rather than enter the cool interior. She needed the sunlight, not the gloomy shadows. Out here, the news that she chose to impart may not seem so dark...

"Before this year ends Gina, you are in an accident in Honolulu. A hit and run driver - you are killed instantly..." Her breath hitched. She had known this forever, but to say it out loud was pain itself. She waited for the shocked sounds that she knew would come from the others and saw the General age beyond his years in the space of those few words.

"My God... Jennifer. How can you sit there and tell me this. How can you?"

"Because it will not happen Nate. I have chosen to interfere - possibly where those of my kind would consider I shouldn't. I have my reasons, and they are not all personal. John, you will take Gina back to Atlantis with you. She will not die here - that is the ONLY way we can change this scenario without causing the ripples through time. If she would be allowed to live within this time line, then too much would change. It would not be allowed and there would be others who would seek to make sure that destiny continued along its set path. What I decree, is a compromise. She will effectively die in this time line, she will cease to exist."

Gina had spun around and John saw the angry set of her face. He threw a confused glance at the others and took off after her. She was fast and it was some distance before he caught her, pulling her around the waist back against him. She fought him like a wild cat, scratching, kicking, even biting and he let her cry, let her yell out her anger and her frustration at what fate had just dealt her.

"Gina... sweetheart. It's ok... please, calm down. I'm here... let me help you." He had to hold her hard and it was a long time before he felt the tremors going through her body begin to calm a little and he let his knees bend and dropped them both onto the grass. He continued to hold her tight until at last she was still. Turning, he looked over his shoulder and saw her father standing there, the look on his face, that of a man who had knowledge beyond his years. Pulling her face back from John's chest as though sensing her father nearby, she looked up and the tears began again.

"Oh Dad... how can this happen? I won't see you again... the knowing - it is worse, far worse."

John rose then, still keeping her trapped in his arms and saw her reasoning. She would live on but they would never see one another again - effectively she would be dead to all in this time line. Her father would have to mourn her death, as would her brother. And it was likely that her brother would never be told the truth. He released her then, a look passing between him and her father as she moved from John's arms to his.

_I'll take her back with me. Keep her safe. Have a life with her... that's why I was allowed that one night.. no consequences, there never could be, because she was not meant for this time line_.. He shook his head at the inner turmoil. He left father and daughter then, needing to head back to the cottage. There was more he needed to learn from Jennifer. Or Callandra. One of them had the answers he sought.

She was still seated on the grass, now talking to Rodney while Ronon stood a short distance away, his posture showing his discomfort at being here and witnessing what was obviously a family situation. "She'll be all right John. I wouldn't have told her - told them both, if I didn't think they could handle the truth." She looked up at John, searching his eyes for some clue as to how he felt.

His own anger simmered. "Of all the damned arrogance. You ancients take the cake, you really do. You flit from one time line to another, one life to another - do you really have any understanding of what you are doing? You play like children, for all your intents and purposes not to change the time line, not to send ripples through time, you play with emotions, with feelings with who people are? Are you not supposed to let them evolve on their own, find their own way through their lives? Your ambitious arrogance meddling is screwing with people - with that woman and her father, with me damn it! Do you know how I feel about her? Or are you playing with our emotions too..."

Rodney's discomfort increased. But he kept his place, knowing that John needed the support of his friends right now. Jennifer rose and moved toward him, sympathy in her eyes, and a little anger also. "Don't presume to know why we do what we do. This is our business and while I can sympathise with the situation you find yourself in now, you are only a small part of a much larger picture John, and there is no room in that picture for tantrums."

Rodney pushed himself towards her now - he had never felt comfortable in the presence of ancients and had always felt that their ways were arrogant. He would enjoy watching his friend take this one down a peg or two, but he could see what it was costing him. "Now see here... Sheppard is right. You are playing with human emotions here. You trick Sheppard into coming back in time fifty years to perform a task that - I get it - is far reaching and important to future life on earth. Then you throw this crap at him? Throw a woman in his path, and I know Sheppard is always tripping over one woman or other, but you seem to take pleasure in changing the rules whenever we get too close to something." He pointed down the path to where Gina and her father were on their way back. "You've involved your own family this time. Interference is the worst form of arrogance..."

John had noted the pair were returning and thrust a hand through his hair. "Answer the question Callandra. How do we get home, how do we get home so these poor people can continue on with their lives before we totally screw it up for them. And for the record? I'm not taking her back with me. That's not your decision - it's mine. She doesn't belong in my time. I want her, don't get me wrong, and it'll be one of the hardest things I do to walk away from her. But to take her from this time for your selfish reasons... let her remain her and live out the rest of her life, with her father, with her brother. For however long it is. Tell us what we need to go then let us get the hell back to where we came from. No more discussion Callandra. That is how it is going to be."

Her eyes were sad when she looked at him, but John's anger won out and flicking a sharp glance to Rodney and Ronon, he turned and walked away from the family whose influence in this time would supercede his own.

She called out one thing to him as he left. "The waterfall John. You'll find your answers in the waterfall. And the way home..."


	20. Chapter 20 The Way Home

CHAPTER 20 THE WAY HOME

When she came back with her father he was just... gone. Her face crumpled then, she couldn't help it. The news she had just received was shocking, almost beyond what she could take and she knew that her father had felt it hard. He had lost his wife, her mother not that many years ago, and the three of them, along with Jennifer, had been a strong family unit ever since. Gina felt a small sense of betrayal at what she had heard. She knew that Jennifer was not the person she had thought she was and that part of her life to date had been a lie. One of her reasons for gaining the degree in physics had not just been her own keen interest in the subject, but the fact that she had received so much encouragement from Jennifer. Had that too, been a lie? Knowing now, that Jennifer would have a granddaughter who would grow up to become a respected phsyicist, airforce pilot and help to initiate the stargate programme beyond the vague idea it was now, she had to wonder how much of Samantha Carter's life had been played with to get her to the point in her life where she was now.

"You let him leave Jen, without saying good bye. He chose not to take me?" Jennifer moved towards her, her arms open now needing to let her niece know that she had done what she had for only good intentions.

"I'm sorry Gina, Nate - I'm sorry for all the hurt this has caused you. I knew that he would be needed to come back here to make sure things stayed on track with the stargate programme. I've waited here for him to arrive, and all the points in your life have led to the moment when you were to meet him. Even Terrence O'Neill. He plays a role in where you are now. John needs to see himself, what his role is. Let him go, let him find out for himself. I have forced everyone's hand and John is different. He has a strength that I cannot manipulate - and both he and Rodney are right. It is arrogance on our part what we chose to do, but it is with the best of intentions. I need you both to understand that." The hurt in Nate's eyes was almost too much for her to bear. "I wish that you could go with her... but that is not possible. You still have a task to fullfill here, there is still unfinished business in your life. I can't tell you more. The rest you will need to discover for yourself."

Nate's eyes were bleak. "How do I give up my daughter? How can you ask me to do that?" The strength of the general seemed to have diminished in this past hour and she felt remorse at his human fraility but she knew that he would not hold human form for the entireity of his life. He carried the gene also, and strongly - even more so than Colonel John Sheppard. This was why General Nathaniel Mitchell had chosen to believe John's story with the simple faith of one who held all the answers inside himself, but had not yet learned the secret to unlocking them. He recognised the gene in the younger man, saw it as a kindred soul - a man who had chosen the military as he had and had grown to feel love for the daughter that was the light of his life.

"I wish I could take your pain away Nate, unfortunately humans need to feel pain in order to help them make the decisions they need to make."

"How much pain do you expect me to take? Damn it Jennifer, I lost my wife and had to watch my daughter abused by a man that I deemed worthy of for her. There are limits to what a man can take and today, I think I may have nearly reached those limits." When he looked around for his daughter he found that she was gone, and feeling his life come crashing down around him, he turned himself and left the cottage where he had often come to seek refuge from his busy career and enjoy the simple companionship being with his sister had brung.

John stood in the area around the waterfall, Rodney and Ronon on either side of him like sentinels. "How do we do this Sheppard? I don't see anything that looks like a portal.?" Ronon was scanning the area.

"You and Rodney - you need to go. This has always been my journey. I love you guys for coming to get me, but I've still got to complete the task I came here for. And I won't go without seeing her again. Without one more night."

Ronon's eyes were dark with concern. "You sure Sheppard?" At his nod Ronon moved to the pool area and looked down into the depths. "So, how do we do this? Jump in? Rodney?"

"Don't look at me Ronon, I don't even like water. My luck I'll drown before I get to the future."

"If you keep moaning, I'll make sure of it." John shut his eyes for a moment and stepped back. Opening them again he looked toward the falls, feeling their pull. Before he left this place, he knew that there were more secrets he had to discover about this place. Suffice for now that it was the way home, but it held other secrets and he would find them. _A few more days... what happened to one night... no, I need to help Nate - General Mitchell with something. There is another task for me, and more secrets. Find the doorway, unlock the door - there's an order to these things. _

"Step behind the falls - it'll only activiate with the right gene potency which you now obviously both have. Don't ask me how I know. Can't answer that one. Go guys, tell Elizabeth that you found me and I'm fine, then good luck explaining just what the hell it is I'm doing here."

"Do we tell her you're bringing back a plus one?" Rodney was fidgeting now, wanting to get moving and get home. Too much sun, too many flowers, too much outdoors. He needed the sanctity of his lab, the sterile calm conditions of his equipment. Not this hot, humid and extremely scented outdoors. That played havoc with this allergies.

"I'm not bringing back a plus one. I'll be coming home a minus one... minus a damn big part of me - but that's my choice and another discussion. Go, before it gets too late. I've got a woman to find.


	21. Chapter 21 Finding Himself

CHAPTER 21 – FINDING HIMSELF

It was like coming home. The island, the flowers, the scent of the tropics and the waves... he had had to borrow Jennifer's boat as both General Mitchell and Gina had left separately and he had no other way of getting back to the island. He pulled the boat hard up on the shore, mindful of the battering storm that had hit last night, and aware that the humidity was building up again. A few ominous clouds skuddered across the horizon and he smelt the scent of a storm in the air – fragrant and strong.

"Gina...Gina – where are you?" Trudging across the sand he pulled off his tshirt, already needing the fresh air on his hot skin. The air felt static, there was electricity brewing and he seemed unsure as to whether it was the storm or the emotional turmoil that shot fingers of pure energy in the wake of his path. "Gina? Sweetheart?"

No answer, in fact the island itself seemed to be holding it's breath. He moved cautiously up to the cottage and found the door slightly ajar. Feeling just a hint of trepidation he stepped through the doorway, feeling the creak of the polished floors under his now bare feet. The house was too quiet, there was no presence here. He did not think she had spent more than the required minutes to toss down her bag which sat atop the kitchen bench and he found her shoes scattered haphazardly across the lounge floor. The bedroom was empty, some clothes discarded negligently and he began to feel the first stirrings of concern.

Out to the back now, to check to see whether both of the boards were still there. Perhaps she was out surfing on another part of the island. Both boards stood tall against the back of the shed and he pulled the door shut in frustration.

_Damn. She's hurting, she thinks I've let her down, already left for the future she thinks I want over her. Where would she go?_

He walked. There was nothing else for him to do. He took to the trails that wound through the jungle like foliage that covered much of the island between her cottage and the shore and stopped frequently to call her name. Nothing, just the empty silence. Even the birds, who more than made their presence known at all times on this island, were silent. As if in mourning.

No longer moving slowly, speed pushed him along, an anxiety that was building in him, building in the air. Something was wrong. He broke through the last of the thick green leaves and came upon a rocky cliff like area, where the wind had begun to build and buffet and looking out to sea from this point, the day no longer seemed tranquil and calm. He saw her then, standing out on the furtherest edge of the cliff that knew that there was a long drop down to the sea below, where likely there would be rocks, sharp and unforgiving.

"Gina? Gina! Get away from the edge. Damn it Gina!" The wind blew his words and he pushed closer to her, but not wanting to startle her into slipping and falling. He had her back to him and her hair flew out behind her, then when the wind changed direction abruptly, it blew across her face so that she had to turn slightly to move it. He cautiously came up on her side vision and when she saw him, she startled a little and took a step closer to the edge.

"Stay back John. Leave me alone. I need to be alone, to think. Don't come any closer." She turned again so that he back was to him, and effectively took another step closer to the edge.

Panic began to set in. He hadn't liked the look on her face. She looked like a wild animal, cornered and out of control and wondered at the turmoil that roiled through her mind right now. Likely it would rival the storm that was beginning to build in the skies above the island.

"Gina – please, we need to talk. Come away from the edge and we'll go home and talk."

"Home? I am home... you need to go home. Leave me here and go home. You chose already – I thought you had already gone. Why are you still here?" The wind was starting to throw her voice away and he cautiously moved closer so that he could hear her.

"I couldn't leave until I had seen you again... I need you. I can't leave yet. There's something else I need to do here – Callandra did not tell me what, but she let me know in no uncertain terms that I wasn't fulfilling my bargain if I left now. I don't know the rules anymore... and I'm sick of the game... can we go home now Gina. Please..."

She slipped a little then and caught herself and his breath caught in his chest. "You're going to fall. Get away from the edge."

"What does it matter John? I can chose my own fate, end it now – better to take my own fate in my hands than wait for the date that has already been set out for me. I can't go back with you, I won't sit here and wait for it to end... D day...that's cruel. You can't expect me to do that to myself or my family."

"Dont't do it Gina – it's not meant to happen. There'll be repercussions..." He took a breath and held out his hand. "And I'll miss out on another night with you..."

She turned then, her foot slipping again, and he moved quickly this time, at her side and gathering her into his arms, safe and moving quickly away from the edge. He lifted her easily and she clung to him, burying her face into his neck, wanting to shut out the storm, the waning light and smell the man who carried her now in his arms.

The storm waited until they were back at her cottage before it broke and when it did it was as if the heavens had opened and were voicing their disapproval that he had broken the rules. He didn't care anymore. He would flout them if he chose. It was his life – and this was her life, and their choices they made would be theirs alone.

He put her down in the kitchen and looked down at her face, calmer now and her eyes looked up into his with a brilliant glow of blue, azure gems that captured his attention. She brought her hands up to frame his face and he couldn't help turning his cheek slightly so that he could rub it against her soft hands.

"One more night Gina... you and me. No ancients, no rules... just us. Ok?"

She didn't reply, just pulled his tshirt out of his jeans and moved against him again, sighing at the scent as she buried her nose against his chest, rubbing softly. She closed her eyes briefly and when she opened them again her clothes were gone, scattered into an untidy pile several feet away. She smiled. She had not even been aware that he had removed them, so caught up in the sense of his smell and the feel of his skin as she rubbed against it.

His hands were everywhere now as though he couldn't touch her in enough places. As though he had one more night to imprint his touch on her body so that she would remember it forever. _As if there was ever a chance that I could forget this man_ she thought, and the thought came hard and sharp causing her breath to hitch and an empty yawning hole to open up inside. But she pushed it away for now, the feel of his hands on her body making her feel more alive than she had ever felt.

He picked her up and laid her carefully on the bed and just stood looking down at her. The expression in his eyes was hard to read. It held a hint of seriousness as though he was trying to reason something with himself and could come to no logical conclusion. Sighing then, he dipped his head, moving to kiss her smooth stomach and smiled against her skin as the rasp of his beard caused her to shiver.

"That unshaven look gives you a dangerous edge John, but plays havoc with the skin..." Her hands had reached down to run over the growth and she felt his mouth move into a smile beneath her hands.

"No men's shavers hidden in your bathroom sweetheart, so I guess you'll have to put up with the burn for just one more night..."

She shut out his words after that, did not want to hear any more about his leaving. Her hands moved to his jeans and gently cupped him through the denim. He was still partly clothed and lifted his head now to look down at her again before standing and removing his jeans. She sat up on the bed, bringing her at eye level with his erect penis and without hesitation she moved forward and took his length into her mouth, hearing his harsh intake of breath as she did this. He was salty, both from his own juices and the ocean and she enjoyed his taste and the texture of his soft skin that pulsed towards climax. His hands had fisted in her hair, but gently and began a light massage of her scalp, before moving down her spine, outlining each joint and back up again. He closed in on her shoulders and rubbed, all the while feeling the warmth and heat from her mouth begin to take him on a ride where there was no ending.

Near climax he gently pushed her away, back onto the bed where he could move the length of his body over her, insert one of his legs between hers and rub gently against her warm centre that felt damp. He watched her arch back slightly off the bed and his hand joined his leg and dipped into the juices that had begun to pool, sliding in and out with excrucaiting slowness that had her gasping his name.

"You want more?... or less...hmmmm?" His voice was a sexy murmur against her ear and his tongue swirled deliciously around her earlobe while his finger continued it's assault.

"Bastard. I want it all!" Growling now, he was on top of her in seconds and gave her just that. One thrust and he was in, hot pulsing and in damn need of release. There was no soft anymore, it was hungry and powerful and he thrust stroke after stroke, long after she had cried out, and long after he was able to formulate any rational thought.

And when he came, so did clarity. He had another visit to make tomorrow.


	22. Chapter 22 The O'Neill of the Past

CHAPTER 22 – THE O'NEILL OF THE PAST

The sudden thought that had come to him at the peak of his climax had left him feeling a little shaken. Callandra had intimated that there was another quest that he was needed for, but he had felt that hesitation in her, and had known that there was a spiderweb of links that were somehow connected with 1962 and likely there was some incredibly cosmic reasoning that had brought a whole lot of angst and turning points for a lot of people and things in their particular year. Alignment of planets perhaps... or something far more complex and far less able to comprehend. He didn't know. He had no idea of the whys and wherefores. Callandra simply gave him glimmers and left him to work the rest out for himself.

So, an epiphany of perhaps not so epic proportions. But an epiphany none the less. Another connection with his present and one that he did not really want to acknowledge or interfere in. But choice did not seem to be something that he had free will in at the moment. Callandra had implied that his strength meant that she could not manipulate him. Untrue. Her force was stronger than she gave herself credit for and his sense of duty was also that much stronger.

Captain Terrence O'Neill. John had already worked that one out and hoped to god that it would just go away. But knew it wouldn't. And so not fair on Jack. Really.

Yes, another connection with his present. With the stargate programme. It all came down to the stargate programme. It all came down to the series of dots that lead one group of people to discover the true design of this ancient device and if just one of those tenuous links were not formed exactly as they should be, it would not happen. Or it would not happen in the time it was meant to happen.

Captain Terrence O'Neill. General Jack O'Neill's older brother. Crap in a hand basket. This one took the cake. Just when had he realised? Oh, about the time that Callandra had looked at him with those big blue eyes and told him he was here for a reason. And knew damn well it was for more than one reason.

He huffed a breath. It was early – hell the sun was still a long time from even thinking about it's daily visit. Gina slept soundly beside him and this alone was enough to bring a smile to his face. Nice to share a bed with someone and wake up next to them – hell, much more than nice. It was wonderful. And this woman in particular? She made his heart sing. And could imagine growing old with her.

Captain Terrence O'Neill. He rolled the name around in his head, poking at connections, attempting to tie knots, and always coming back to the same thing. This bastard had beat Gina, more than once. What was the mitigating factor in this man's life to turn him around? No one knew anything about General O'Neill's family, hell, no one knew whether he even had one. The man was private personified. They all knew that there had been a wife and son, and knew that the kid had accidentally shot himself using the General's gun that had been left loaded in the house. And John knew, not just from memory, but from the way the general's eyes sometimes took on that lonely look, that he had never forgiven himself for an accident he had deemed to be his fault.

Gina stirred beside him. How could he explain to her that he needed to go to the brig where her ex lover was being held? His reasons would seem preposterous to her. To tell her or not? Enlist her father's help on this one? He knew that Callandra would chose not to interfere, and that was fine by him. He preferred her to keep her distance. Too many uncomfortable feelings when she was around, that whole seeing right into his soul thing was not really very pleasant.

She rolled her body against his and snuggled tightly, needing to draw some sort of strength from his nearness. Folding her tightly into his arms he closed his eyes, hoping that some sort of inspiration would find purchase in his mind in a few more hours of precious sleep.

They shared coffee and a simple breakfast of toast and fruit over the light of another Hawaiian morning.

"I need to go and talk to your father, Gina – and I need to go alone. I can't tell you my reasons yet, and I prefer to keep this private for now and know that you'll respect that?"

He saw a shutter come down over her eyes and mentally cursed himself. But telling himself that he didn't do this to hurt her, he continued. "Something else I need to do, and the less people I involve with these damn stupid quests I am supposed to do, the less chance they have of backfiring in my present. I won't be long, in fact, in may not even happen. Come to the main island with me this morning, and we can meet up for a picnic afterwards... maybe go to the waterfall again..."

He deliberately let the innuendo hang in the air, but his gaze was quickly brought up when she pushed her chair abruptly back from the table and set about clearing their dishes without answering. "Gina? What's wrong?" The set of her small chin had him thinking, and again he mentally cursed himself. Not a good start to the morning. Of course. He may associate the waterfall with... other things – but Gina? She associated it now with his way home. _God Sheppard, you can be dumb sometimes, really. You think like a typical man, with what's down below. She's a woman. She thinks with other parts, sees other connections. Foot in the mouth – much._

Wanting to clear the air he came up behind her at the sink as she began running water into the sink and a small corner of his mind recognised the simple domesticity of the scene. Certainly something he was not used to. Standing behind his woman at the sink of the kitchen, looking out of the window at the garden beyond. Simple pleasures, one taken for granted by so many. One that Gina should have in her life. With him? Ah crap...

"I'm sorry Gina – I know you think of other things when I talk about the waterfall, and I'm sorry for bringing it up. For me, it is a magic place, and not because it is the way home. It is the place we've shared our most precious moments – and I just wanted to do something special for you again." He wrapped his arms around her pulling her hard against him and he felt the instant stirring that her nearness brought. He brought his face down to nuzzle her neck, gently though – mindful of the fact that he had still yet to shave.

"I know John – and I apologise for my sensitivity. I try to keep a logical mind knowing that it is your point of return and I do relish those moments we shared... you have no idea how much. Just a woman's usual issues I guess – we over think things.. sometimes actions are so much better." And with that she turned and molded herself against him, rubbing and needing and her actions were made abundantly clear.

"I'm going to take a shower John. If you'd care to join me..." She tossed a saucy look over her shoulder and she moved out of his arms, leaving the dishes to soak in the sink and headed toward the bathroom, leaving a trail of clothes along the way. He shook his heads. Yeah – those actions were pretty clear...


	23. Chapter 23 Another Connection is Made

CHAPTER 23 – ANOTHER CONNECTION IS MADE

"You're crazy Sheppard! Why do you need to get in to see him? And why the hell didn't you leave yesterday if you're not going to take her back with you? You need to get out of her life now and let her move on. For the little time that she has left, at least."

OK, so the General was pissed. He got that. And pissed on many levels. John dragged a hand through his hair as he attempted an explanation, drawn in spite of himself, to the bleak look that was hovering over the General's face, one that could not be fully eradicated by the somewhat forbidding one that he had chosen to wear today.

"I know what he did to her General and with all due respect, sir – that man, for all his faults is destined to do a more worthy task. I don't know why he did what he did to Gina, without appearing to defend him I can only assume that something in his childhood opened up this whole bad ass can of worms. I can't fix that and I can't fix what happened to Gina, but I've got to make sure he's turned around. Because he has a younger brother. A younger brother who will turn ten later this year, about the same time that Gina is supposed to be killed and in that same accident, their father will also be killed – by running into the traffic to try and save Gina. This will leave a ten year old boy fatherless, and unless his older brother steps up to the plate and assumes guardianship of him, he'll become a casualty to the social welfare system. A what should become a great man, will take to a life of crime. And once again it comes down to one thing... the stargate programme. All roads lead back to that..."

The General's face had lost it's hard lines a little as this additional burden rested uncomfortably on his broad shoulders. "Captain Terrence O'Neill – he is supposed to assume guardianship of his younger brother? If he does, who does this boy become? Why is he so important to your stargate programme?"

"The connections are staggering General and everytime I find a new thread I feel like I'm becoming entangled in one of those damn giant balls of wool. One that I can never get out of."

John had taken to pacing again. His hair stood up in spikey disarray and he knew that he looked dangerous and dishevelled and needed desperately to shave. "This boy was born on 20th October 1952 and he was named Jonathon Jack O'Neill. If he follows his true path, he will become Brigadier General Jack O'Neill, the first man to command a stargate team – the flagship team SG1 and the first human from earth in our day, to step through the stargate as soon as it's full implications were known. So you see General, he's an important part of my present. He needs his brother to give him the stability of a home life. No mother, she died some time ago and we cannot let him become a part of the system."

He waited for the General to interupt, but the man was uncannily silent, eyes dark and a little dangerous as they tracked John's restless pacing around the room. _The predator watching the prey?_

John tried to appreciate the irony, but failed to see even the smallest amount of amusement. This man's world had come crashing down around him in the last two days and all because one man had stepped through a time portal to deliver blow after blow of brutal news. _You can kill me now General, but it won't go away. They'll send someone else back. I am the messenger, a player – I don't make the rules, hell, most of the time I don't even follow them. I wish I could take your pain away – and I think before my time here is done, I'll have more to give you... but I think too, there is some good news heading your way. Soon general...soon._

"Something that may sway this in your favour General. This man, Jack O'Neill – he marries your niece, Colonel Samantha Carter. How's that for the kicker? Hmmm?"

If John had not felt sympathy for the man before, then it was here in spades now. The General's face however, rather that show emotion – hardened and the bad ass general was back, just as his daughter remembered and bringing a whole new cloak of respect from John. He was tough, no doubt about it. John just hoped that he was tough enough.

"So where does that leave things Sheppard? I can't just bust the man out of there! He's still got two years of his sentence to serve and no more military for him." The General reached out a hand as though to steady himself for a moment.

"If I had not put a stop to O'Neill's relationship with my daughter, would she have given birth to a child who would have become your Jack's adopted brother or sister? If Terrence were to legally adopt his brother?"

John huffed a small laugh. "Don't get me started on relationships General. I have enough trouble with the basic ones. If he were to legally adopt him, then yes – that would be accurate. Guardianship is a different matter. Jack would have become Gina's brother in law and Sam Carter, who is also her cousin removed, would still be her cousin... aaah crap... so not going there."

_Damn you Callandra. I'm dizzy! I can't keep the ripples, the effects straight! Who matters to who? Who needs to be with who? What pairing makes what relationship? You have a lot to answer for, with your ancient meddling and your predestined pairings. I am not a damn matchmaker. Do your own dirty work!_

"Likely I'm missing a link or six here General, and quite frankly the whole thing is making me damn dizzy. Ripples and paradoxes. The implications are mind boggling. Me – I'm a flyboy – give me an aircraft, a space ship – any kind! I'll fly it and it'll be the best damn feeling in the world. Give me this crap? I'm lost sir, the same as you are. You and I, with all due respect sir – are not so dissimilar. Men of action. We do – we receive clear instruction that complements our training and we – do! This ancient crap – I hate it and I hate what it is doing to you, to Gina to your whole family. And I hate what it is doing to me..."

His voice broke a little on these last words and General Mitchell's eyes shot sharply to John. Something in the younger man touched him. John was right. They were two of a kind, he was like his own son Frank – they shared the same subtle humour and slight disregard for the rules. He felt a lot of respect for the younger man and knew what it must cost him to be here now.

"Sheppard... I know what you're asking me to do here. This man – one whom I may add I encouraged her to become involved in – and you can imagine how well that knowledge sits with me... he beat her damn it – and if you want proof – here..." He reached into his desk drawer after unlocking the small top one and after drawing out an envelope from the very back he threw a handful of pictures across the desk. "This is what he did to her. Look at these pictures Sheppard, then tell me just how the hell I am supposed to let this guy loose...!"

A punch hit John in the gut like a fist as he looked at the pictures fanned out untidily across the General's desk. It was brutality. No other word for it really. The bruising on her ribs was significant, marring the perfect smoothness he himself had been witness to and he had to contain his own hands which had fisted at his sides. He wanted nothing more than to slam that bastard over and over.

_How could this man be the brother of General Jack O'Neill, a man who had more bravery, more integrity and more humanity in his little finger than most humans that I have met?_

Hell, more than once John had wished that he had had a father like Jack O'Neill and was proud to call him his commanding officer.

"So you see Sheppard, why I struggle to find it in myself to let this son of a bitch go. Regardless of the case you have set out pleading his defence. I don't know this kid Jack – and I can only take your word on what he will become and the relationships after that, hell – way too confusing to even begin to understand. But I do know this man. And I trusted him once. He was under my command and a fine young man – brilliant almost. Alcohol I suspect, played a part in his decline and his mood swings that Gina spoke of. But the violence? Violence is not learned. It is born. And I have to believe that violence was in him from the moment he was born waiting to manifest itself. And you know yourself son, we can't have people like that in military – they fight for the wrong reasons."

General Mitchell had composed himself somewhat, gathering the pictures now to lock them back in his desk drawer. "I won't be the one to authorise his release, no matter what the implications of this in your present. I have my own principals, son and I won't compromise them for anybody."

'Son'... the word spoken lightly no doubt, brought a stab of pain to John. General O'Neill often slipped that one in too. Too bad his own father was such a jerk. Before him now stood another good man, one he would have been proud to call Dad, and he hated to see the man's anger directed at him.

"I won't ask you to do that General, but perhaps there is another who can convince you. If Gina were to tell you that she had forgiven him for what he did, perhaps then you would consider my request?"

The general become suddenly still. "Gina has spoken to you of it then? I assumed it was something that she was so ashamed of that she kept it buried away."

"I won't lie and tell you that she is over it, but I think she has moved on – and I'd like to think I played a not too small role in that one. Perhaps another reason I came back when I did. She needed me and it was a small thing I could give her. When she talked to me about him, there was pain yes, but I think she was disappointed in herself. If I explained to her, that if he was given another chance, then he had the opportunity to set the wrongs right, but doing something good. In raising his brother to be the man he is supposed to be."

"It would be all so easy Sheppard, if we were given the opportunity to go back and erase our mistakes. You task seems to be to erase many – are any of them your own per chance?" A small amount of humour had drifted into the man's voice, and John's thoughts wandered again. He wished he could have known this man in his own time line.

"Everything in the open from now on Sheppard... with my daughter. I won't have her last moments on this heart tainted by lies and distrust."

John left him then, rolling the general's words around in his head. _Distrust and lies. Not if he could help it..._


	24. Chapter 24 To Smell the Flowers

CHAPTER 24 TO SMELL THE FLOWERS

Gina was waiting for him at a deli in town after he had finished with the general. He would heed her father's words and tell her everything and prepared himself for the instant shuttering of her expression. Instead he found resolve. She didn't speak at first, wandering down the aisles of the deli gathering food for a picnic and he had to reach for her arm partway through the store needing to read the expressions on her face.

"Gina, talk to me. I need to know what you're thinking."

She gave a small laugh. "I can see by the trepidation in your eyes that you expected anger. I kinda like to keep you on your toes..."

He drew her closer, oblivious to the other shoppers. "You're an amazing woman, you know that?"

"Actually John, yeah I do! Partly, thanks to you..."

"Humble too, sweetheart..."

She laughed. "Ok, I'm officially in a good mood. Let's get the food sorted and head down to the beach and you can fill me in on the your latest theory. Just for the record, I'm starting a new filing cabinet up there.." she tapped her head to indicate. "otherwise there's no way on God's earth that I am ever going to keep all these connections, all these supposed threads, straight. I consider myself an intelligent person, really I do. Humble be damned. I know what I am. But this Colonel John Sheppard...is a little mind numbing...!"

"No arguments from me there Gina – my mind may be numb – fortunately I'm working mostly with another part of my anatomy when I'm in your presence..." and the wicked grin on his face had her punching him lightly on the arm and looking forward to another night with this man. Or afternoon. If she could swing it!

"I'm guessing that this latest theory of yours is a doozy.. you looked awfully serious there for a moment, like I was going to blow a gasket or something. But I didn't hear gunshots coming from my father's office, so I know that it can't be bad enough for him to pull a gun on you."

"Your dad? He's a pussy cat..."

Her skeptical glance had him laughing as he kicked his shoes off to walk on the sand. "And just how did you manage to get him wrapped around your little finger? Apart from Terry, who he more or less foisted on me, he did not exactly approve of my choices of men. Gave them all a hard time."

"Aah, that would be the Sheppard charm. Works on women, old ladies and general's – in that order." When he saw his teasing comment didn't fetch an answering grin he pulled on her hand questioningly.

"You never mentioned a woman back in Atlantis. I don't even know if there is somethere there that you are involved in. Is that the reason you won't take me back?"

He set the food down and pulled her into his arms. "There's no one Gina, not for a long time..."

Finding a quiet place away from other people he pulled her down onto the sand and looked around Waikiki Beach. Minus the high rise buildings and blatent commercialism it was still a bustling tourist spot, but without the frenetic energy that the twenty first century would bring. People still moved at a slower comfortable pace and not in such a rush to be somewhere and to do something. That was something he felt had not changed for the better in his time. No one took the time to appreciate simple beauty. The sunrise, the smell of a pretty flower, the touch of a woman and being here in _this _ now had brought that home to him in spades. Life needed to be enjoyed and as he curled his toes into the sand of this famous beach he vowed, at least for the next couple of hours, to do just that.

They fell asleep on the sand, fingers entwined together, having enjoyed the picnic and light talk about nothing in particular. The sun was hot and the air fragrant and after resorting to a quick swim fully clothed, due unfortunately to the fact that there really too many people on this beach to attempt otherwise, they had simply drifted into oblivion in the hot sun while drying off. And when he awoke a short half an hour later he was still holding her hand and took a precious moment to enjoy the feeling of just being alive.

"John... it's time you told me what you've been doing your damnedess to keep bottled up inside you for the past hour. Reality doesn't hide just because the players take a break from the story. Spill it...!"

She had rolled to her side and looked at him through bright intelligent eyes.

"Can I ask you something Gina? I need an honest answer from you, but I need to think carefully about it first." He paused a moment, letting some sand drift through his free hand, the one that was not holding hers. "Have you forgiven him at all for what he did? Have you moved on yet?"

He felt her tug her hand away from his and sat up so that they touched thigh to thigh. "Why do you ask John? Before I can give you answer, I need to know why you asked."

"Does you answer depend on this?" He rested his hand now on her knee, needing to keep contact with her.

She did not shrug his touch away. "Yes John, how I answer the question depends on why you asked it."

He huffed a breath and explained the link with Terrence O'Neill to his present. He watched her face as she attempted to connect the dots. She was a smart woman and quickly fit the pieces together.

"My father wouldn't give his permission to release him from his sentence, would he? Pussy cat... John, I don't think so. I know my father. When he takes a stand, it is a stand. Immovable, like the Rock of Gilbraltar. He left it to me. If I chose to forgive him, release him on his own recognizance, then he wouldn't stand in my way, but he would not make that move. Smart man, my father." She looked sharply at John now. "No presssure from you then? I expected an argument, a plea of some sort."

There was a little sarcasm in her voice now and he mentally cringed. Ok, so it wasn't going to be a walk in the park. Her father knew her better than he did. He didn't need to give in – he knew his daughter would not make it easy for him. Scratching his head now, he figured his next move. _So much for the players knowing their damn roles. Some guidance Callandra? You interfere when I don't want you to, and when I need some assistance, just where the hell are you then?_

"I know what he put you through so I won't do you the injustice of arguing with you. I've told you my reasons... the reasons from your future. I've told you the man that Jack O'Neill will become, and I've told you his relationship to your cousin, Sam. This likely will not happen if Terrence remains in prison beyond October 1962."

"Have you not considered John, that if his father was to be killed in October, in the same accident where I supposedly die – and just saying that is seriously creeping me out by the way... - then wouldn't they release him from jail anyway to look after his brother?"

John went back to playing with the sand. It seemed easier than looking her in the eye right now. "You'd think that would be the case, hmmm? Apparantly not. What happens is that Terrence goes kinda crazy in jail when he hears about his father, and through circumstance as much as idiocy on his part, he kills one of the wardens. And that's more or less the end of the former Captain Terrence O'Neill. If you get my drift."

"You must hate knowing all this John. You must hate having to sit there and tell me bad news after bad news. Is there anything good that comes out of this? Apart from Jack O'Neill becoming a brigadier general and eventually commander of the stargate programme. So far you have me being killed in a few months, Terrence killing someone, an astronaut dying in a crash and a young boy that turns to the wild side because his father is killed. That's a lot of seriously bad crap to happen in one year, to affect a small group of people. Don't you think?"

"A small group of people Gina? Who are you kidding. Those events affect the entire space programme in the future. You are all tied together, your two families. From day one. 1962 was a year with many milestones, but your two families are the cornerstone to the stargate programme. I have to keep that together."

Gina lay back in the sand and shut her eyes to block out the sun for a short time. "Tell me something good that happens this year John. All I've heard about is the bad. The stuff that you have to stop. Tell me something good and then I'll give you my decision."

He thought for a moment. History was one of the things he enjoyed, although 1962 was a little vague and he had to reach back and look for some interesting facts to throw at her. To allow her time to come to her own decision.

"OK babe... let's see. December 30th - Green Bay Packers beat NY Giants 16-7 in NFL championship game, October 28th - NY Giant YA Tittle passes for 7 touchdowns vs Wash Redskins (49-34) , October 14th - Houston Oiler George Blanda throws for 6 TD passes vs NY Titans 56-17,..."

"No more... I get it... football John? Really? You could tell me so much, but you chose football?"

"You said to tell you something 'good' – I think that qualifies?"

She laughed then and abruptly sat up, resting her head against his shoulder. "You win. I'll go and see him. Tomorrow. After today. After …. " and she ran her hand along his leg and moved to the inside, flicking it lightly over his groin area and smiled when he hitched a breath. "After, that..."

"You, sweetheart... are inherently evil. But you wish is my command... so let's get out of here."

"Let's go home..."

_Home. Her home. For now, his home. Until all the threads were tied together, knotted back into one bit ball of wool. Home._


	25. Chapter 25 Confronting Her Demons

CHAPTER 25 – CONFRONTING HER DEMONS

John stood with her looking out over Pearl Harbour, an integral part in American history. He had been here before, in her future, his past – and it was then as it was now, a sobering experience. Within the grounds of Pearl Harbor were a number of exhibits, displays, memorials, and museums, honoring not only the 1,177 victims of the Japanese attacks, but all of those who bravely served in World War II. Built over the wreckage of the USS Arizona, the Memorial was a sobering experience a place to come to pay their respects. The attacks on Pearl Harbor remained as one of the most significant, historic events in the history of the United States. What started out as an ordinary Sunday on the island of Oahu, quickly turned tragic, as two waves of Japanese fighter planes bombed and destroyed the peaceful harbor where the United States Pacific Fleet was stationed. The island of Oahu and the United States of America would never be the same, and instantly the country had became involved in World War II.

The Navy Brig here housed military prisoners from the combined navy and airforce units and it was here that the former Captain Terrence O'Neill was being held, having been stripped of his military rank and being held on charges of assault.

"You ready for his Gina? I'll be right there with you, but it's all up to you – I can only offer support."

Gina gripped his hand tightly and he noticed that she looked a little pale in the bright Hawaiian sun. "I won't lie John. It's not going to be easy. But I'll go through with it. I understand the importance and I can deal with it – I can. Just promise me this – when it's over, let's just go quickly. Somewhere else. So I can forget again..."

He hugged her then and nodded. "Let's go then. You dad has set the meeting up. He was due to come up for early release last month but turned the meeting down. They've agreed to give him another shot at the meeting if you can make a formal statement agreeing that he has reformed sufficiently to be released into society. His military rank will remain stripped but your father has petitioned for it to be kept under strict cover so that it doesn't taint young Jack's eventual entry into the airforce. He's had to pull some strings, and I didn't think he would do it, but the old man came through."

"I bet you don't have the guts to call him that to his face...?"

"Old man? Hell no... still value my balls sweetheart! And if he heard that one pass my lips, they'd be worthless... more or less..."

"Less I'm thinking. Regardless of what you think – my father is certainly no 'pussy cat'. Even if he has taken to you a little too quickly."

John had gotten the result he wanted. Some light patter had relaxed her and he saw the teasing light come into her eyes, pushing out some of the darkness that had been lurking there.

"Just as you have sweetheart... must run in the family..."

"Yeah John... it's called madness!" and she laughed as he chased her rather inappropriately, slowing to a more sedate stroll as they approached the Brig. From here on in all jokes would be put on hold.

This was a military prison, and while John fortunately carried military ID on him at all times when offworld in Atlantis and had been able to retrieve this from his tactical vest before this meeting, it was still a meeting that would be frowned upon by many and eyes would be on them – closely.

They waited in a small interview room and when Terrence O'Neill walked in, John was pensive, watching him a little warily and felt a feeling of surrealness – this was General Jack O'Neill's older brother. He didn't see a lot of family resemblence going on – would have passed him in the street and not even tossed him a second look. He saw too, that his own frank look was returned in spades and it was the sharpening of those brown eyes that brought the General to mind. Yep, there was an O'Neill in there all right...

Then his attention was all on the woman who sat at the table. Terrence had not been told who he was going to see, and he paled a little when he saw Gina sitting there. Coming to a stop in front of her he rubbed his hands along his pants legs as though already uncomfortable in her presence. It had been a year since he had seen her and in that year, he had come to many conclusions about himself. Incarceration, along with some very good counselling, had gone a long way in helping him see that he had been a poor excuse for a human being and an even poorer excuse for a man.

"Terry... you look well. Better than the last time I saw you, anyway..." Her greeting peetered out a little, as though she had suddenly lost her confidence. Under the table, John reached for and squeezed her hand in support and she sat up a little straighter. This man could not hurt her now, and she needed to move on with her life, and give him the chance to move on with his.

"I need to talk to you Terry. There's some things I need to say, and I'm sorry if they make you uncomfortable being said in the presence of someone else."

Terrence's eyes flicked to John, and there was a tiny spark of humour in them. Again, the O'Neill gene made it's irrespresible presence felt. "So Gina, are you going to introduce me to the 'some one else?"

"Colonel John Sheppard – he's a friend, here with me today for support."

"A friend...hmmm, yes I can see that. Sheppard? Where are you stationed? Not here in Hawaii I assume."

John's answer was guarded. "Recruited to NASA, test pilot..." which was essentially true, in another time line. And was rewarded with the instant respect that shot into the other man's eyes.

"Yeah, I hear the future is up there, what with the Mercury missions heating up. Good for you." His gaze flicked down to where he must have known their hands were joined under the table. "And looks as though you've helped Gina through some of the crap I put her through."

The pain flared in O'Neill's eyes. "Aaah Gina, if I could take back a moment in time – that would be it. I've never had the chance to apologise to you, I mean _really_ apologise to you. I can't offer excuses for what I did, but I've had time to ponder the whys and wherefores in this past year and know that my drinking pushed me over the edge more than once. Been sober for that year now, so that feels like progress.."

"That's why I'm here Terry. I need to tell you that I've moved on, that while I can't understand why you did what you did, I have forgiven you – I'm past it now and can live my life without it always being in the way. And I can sit here and look at you and not feel fear or anger. I guess we all did a lot of soul searching in that year..."

He dropped down into the seat opposite them now and there was moisture in his eyes which he swiped quickly away. "I wish I could take it back – and losing you, hell – the worst thing really. I'm glad you've moved on.." again that flickered look to John when he said this, "you deserve happiness. I hate that I let your father down too – he trusted me as a friend and as an officer and I can't get that trust back. He was like a father to me."

Gina knew that this was where she could begin to turn the tide a little. "You have a father Terry, and a brother – both who miss you, I 'm sure."

John watched O'Neill's eyes soften at the mention of his family and knew that they had made the right call. He wasn't a bad man, just had made some bad choices in his life. And whatever the catalyst had been for his violence, John doubted that it was anything that his father had done. Likely something he was born with. General Mitchell was right in that respect. Violence is not learned, but it can be unlearned and with the right treatment, O'Neill could learn to control his. But a military situation was not the right one for him.

"My father contacted me last week. He wants to bring JJ out for a visit in October. Said that Chicago's starts to get cold around then, and they could do with the break, celebrate the kid's birthday here in the sun. I told him no – didn't want him seeing me in prison like this – not my kid brother either. Bad enough he has to know I'm here – I don't want JJ to see me here."

At the mention of October John wanted nothing more than to jump up and leave the room – let things stand. That way, the family were not in Hawaii in October and the father did not get killed in the same accident as Gina. He looked at her now, connections, threads... here in this room were the tendrils of that great ball and he was attempting to tie yet more knots into the yarn. He sighed and knew that he had to do this and squeezed Gina's hand lightly. It was her show.

And she proved to be a stunning actress, taking the stage now with no rehearsal and no real knowledge of the role she played. Her act would have brought a broadway producer to his knees as she played out the first act, the one that would save the life of one Jonathon Jack O'Neill.

"I've talked to some people Terry, and my father agrees with me. You're ready for early release. You've come a long way during your counselling and I don't want to see a good life ruined. You say your dad and JJ are coming out to visit? Let them come, but make sure you're out of this brig before they do. Show them Hawaii, and show them that you've turned your life around. There's a job waiting for you – civillian pilot – my dad has already talked you up to them and they'll take you on his recommendation. Will you do this for me Terry?"

He pushed back from the table now. "Why are you doing this for me Gina? I don't deserve your forgiveness or any help from you or your family. Not after what I did to you."

"I'm doing this as much for your family as for you Terry. They deserve a son who aspires to be the person he should be. I saw good in you when we were together. That's still there, and you've managed to control...the other. Go out and live your life and make your family proud of you again. And when they come and see you later in the year, enjoy them.. family is our future in more ways than you can ever possibly begin to understand."

O'Neill shot her a surprised look, no doubt a little taken back by her impassioned words and saw something then, in her eyes that had him quickly shuttering his own. He wouldn't question any further her motives for doing what she did. He was an astute man and knew that other forces were perhaps at work here. But he'd not let any more people down and would take the opportunity that was being placed firmly in his path. His face softened.

"Thank you Gina, for believing in me again. That means more than you can imagine. I wish you only the best also, for your life..." and blinked in surprise when tears started to fall from her eyes. He went to move towards her then stopped at John's look. Sheppard had been the silent type up until now, but O'Neill saw the steely glint in his eye. This was his woman now, and while Gina and her father may have let bygones be bygones, he saw by one look that this man would not be so forgiving. One move wrong and Sheppard would be over him like a hurricane out of control. He saw the tightly coiled emotions in the man, knew when to back down.

"Gina – time to go. You've done what you came here for. It's done now. In place..." The words were odd to O'Neill's ears and he tried to piece things together. In place? Odd, for suddenly, things seemed incredibly out of place as though there had been a subtle shift in the earth's axis and his world had moved slightly off centre. Odd. He looked at the other man, really looked at him and saw the suddenly slightly blurred outline. Blinked and that was gone. Odd. And looked deep into his eyes as he passed him holding Gina now, to leave the room and what he saw there made him shiver. This man had been to hell and back and seen a lifetime and then some. The eyes being windows to the soul? Hell, this man's soul was ancient...


	26. Chapter 26 Closure or Reopening?

CHAPTER 26 – CLOSURE OR REOPENING

"I'm proud of you Gina, and I know dear old dad will be too... that took a lot of guts. To face down your demons like that, and you did it with such cool!" They cleared the barracks and once away from prying eyes he pulled her tightly into his arms and held her, letting her scent drift over him and racing heart which now beat at an alarming rate, slow down.

"God John,that was so hard. Looking at him like that, and remembering what he did. But he does deserve another chance – or even if not him, then his brother deserves to remember him as a good person. He needs to go on to be the man that he is supposed to be. His father? That was a tough one. Knowing a part of the future is the worst thing imaginable. Perhaps not... perhaps knowing and not being able to do a damn thing about it... that is worse."

"Yet Callandra does it without impunity... where does she draw the line...?" John murmured this last comment and turning Gina slightly, he tucked her against his side and they moved off through the area known as Pearl Harbour where more ghosts than live people walked.

"Where to now John?" She wrapped one arm around his waist, knowing that their time together was shortening by the hour and needing to hang onto him for as long as she could.

"The waterfall... I need to put the personal shield into the deeper pool. It gets carried to the exact area where Walter falls into the ocean. It will take all that time to reach it's location. Exact science? Nah... a meddling ancient whose presence sits on my shoulder like a damn monkey telling me what to do..." He patted his pocket. "So I came prepared. One ancient personal shield."

She had stilled at the mention of the waterfall, simply stopped walking. "You're leaving then? Once you put the device in the water?" He saw the spark of terror in her eyes and wanted nothing more than to chase it away. Forever.

"Not yet Gina... the games still in the second quarter and the quarterback's about to issue instructions for the new play. And the ball is passed to... Sheppard!"

She punched him then, hard and pulling away she started to walk fast – her intention to put distance between herself and his teasing. Cursing himself for his inept handling of this situation, he quickly caught up with her. "Damn, I'm sorry Gina. Stupid thing to say – I use humour to cover what I really feel – I'm sure you've already picked that up. I can't help it. The alternative is cry and I want to make you laugh, not cry."

Her face when she turned it to him was damp with tears. "Don't make me beg John. Take me with you. I have no life left here..."

"Don't say that!" His voice held anger now. "Did you not see your father's face when he heard? It was the end for him – to take you away before? He'll never see you again! At least this way he has more time..."

"Damn it John! What would be worse? Watching your daughter die even if you've had a few more precious months with her – or knowing she's somewhere else – at least safe and happy. Put yourself in his shoes, I know you tried, but you didn't see the whole picture. Talk to him. Give him the choice. Don't make it for us. I want to be with you, and I know you want the same thing. You're denying us the chance that we have been given – given by someone who has the power to do this. Instead of questioning it and finding fault in it, can't we just take it... please?"

He didn't know what to tell her. He didn't really know himself why he felt it so important not to chance what had been set into place. Damn yes, he wanted her. And wanted her safe. But he knew that Callandra had another reason for him to take her back to Atlantis, and he suspected that it was this unknown reason, that held him back now. Too many things left unsaid. Too many half truths.

"We need to go to the waterfall now Gina. Right now. Do what needs to be done. We'll deal with everything else after. There's an order and I have to make sure it's followed. I know we have to deal with everything else – but after. We'll make our decisions together.. I promise."

Her gaze now held hope and his heart shifted a little. He had to make the right choices. It was more than one heart that rode the line and if his choices were wrong, then the consequences would filter through not just the people here that were affected, but those in his timeline. His hand went to her face and wiped the dampness away.

"Know this Gina. Whatever happens today, tomorrow or in the next fifty years. I've fallen in love with you. No one will take that away from me, or you. That one's for us." And he lowered his head to kiss her hard, tasting her salty tears and feeling that same tilt of the earth's axis that O'Neill had felt. Things were shifting. He had to complete what he set out to do.


	27. Chapter 27 The Beginning or the End?

CHAPTER 27 – THE BEGINNING OR THE END?

That same eerie feeling came over him when they arrived back at the waterfalls. One time superimposed upon many others. If he squinted hard enough, he felt that he could see the ghosts of all the ancestors standing around the edges of the falls, just watching, waiting, to see if he would make the right decisions. Temptation was there. To simply stand and give them the proverbial finger and tell them to sod off. This was his life and he was through with the manipulation and control and the feeling of being on a damn runaway train.

Gina felt it too, even without the blood running through her veins. She sensed the centuries of discord, of reasoning of humans making sense of situations over which they had no control. She tugged on his hand and looking down at her he saw the unease on her face and simply pulled her closer. No words, just touch. And if he shut his eyes he could simply pretend that it was the two of them against the world, against the universe. Together.

He reached into his pocket and brought out the device. It was small, fit comfortably into the palm of his hand. It needed to be initialized by the Ancient Technology Activation gene in order to be used. Once active, it need only be placed anywhere on the body to engage the forcefield. While active, the forcefield would diffuse all forms of energy, including energy weapons and kinetic energy from bullets. It also possessed a built-in "Inertial dampener" which would protect the wearer if they fell from a great height. It had an internal power cell which would eventually deplete under strain, and was not rechargeable once it had been depleted. The shield responded to mental commands, and would generally require discipline to use correctly and could only be deactivated by mental command. Without proper mental focus, the user's subconscious desires may override their conscious desires, resulting in unwanted behavior from the device.

Knowing all this about the device, John hoped that Callandra would allow the poor astronaut some sort of enhanced training in how to work the damn device or he'd still be in the water without a paddle – personal shield or otherwise. He knew from personal experience with their experimentation of them in Atlantis, that they did sometimes have a not so welcome effect. Still, not his problem. Hers. Callandra would deal with that one. He simply had to get the device to the astronaut.

In one smooth throw he sent it flying into the centre of the deep pool, surrounded by lush foliage, the singing of tropical birds and the rushing sound of the falls that fell through the rocks that shifted and became hazy if one gazed at them too long. One such as himself, anyway. There. It sank into the depths, inactive now, waiting for it's intended wearer to claim it. To begin it's journey underground, picked up by an understream current, taken through a underground tunnel of freezing water that appeared to flow straight down to hell itself, then out into the ocean, to drift, caught on the tides - following a course as preset by the moon, the configuration of the stars and the chess game that was now in play. Mission complete. Almost.

He took her hand as she leaned into him, and took a deep breath. "Done. What now? Life goes on. For me. For you. For the rest of the damn universe. All because of this action. It's almost humbling really..."

"Gina?" They both turned when they heard the voice and saw General Mitchell and another man standing some distance away, discreetly as if unsure whether to intrude.

"Dad. Frank? You never come here Frank... say it feels strange...what's brought you here today?"

"You Gina..." his breath hitched and he moved forward and John watched him keenly and knew immediately that it was Gina's brother. And Lieutenant Cameron Mitchell's father. One day, very soon. The resemblance was startling. Having spent some time in the officer's company in their early air force days, they had become friends and Cam had joined SG1 at around the same time as John had joined the Atlantis programme, taking over as commander of SG1 after Jack O'Neill became a general and was promoted to a non field role within the SGC. So this was the other connection, the one he knew was still to come. Had felt it when he looked at General Mitchell and remembered Callandra's comment that the general's role had not been fulfilled yet. And suddenly certain things about his old friend Cam fell into place. Oh yeah. Paradoxes and ripples. He'd better be damn careful not to cause any right now.

"Dad told me... aah hell sis. I don't know what to say. God, I don't know what to think..." His gaze swung to John now and there was an assessing quality there, as John found himself weighed up, checked, sized and finally given a grudging stamp of approval. All in space of a single glance. Oh yeah - this was Cam's old man, no doubt about it. And Cam's grandfather... and aunt? _Crap! Is there anyone on this damn island who does not have connections back in my time. What the hell is going on?_

Then he began laughing and unable to stop himself, even when he saw the anger begin to build in Frank's eyes at what he considered disrespect for his feelings. "I'm sorry. Really. I mean no disrespect. Really. Cam told me that he and Sam had a distant family connection. Of course. Cam's dad and Sam's dad - cousins. I feel a little as though I have been caught in an incestuous web of tangled connections, and if I appear slightly mentally deficient or exhibit signs of lunacy, then this is because this has been the day to end all days and I am so sorry you have to deal with all this on top of the crap you have just learned."

His laughter abruptly ceased and he let his features slip and now he looked at Frank with sadness. "I don't know how much you've been told Frank, and hell - you've got every right to rail at the universe for what you've been found out."

"John. Not now. Please." Gina had moved toward her brother and was looking up at him. He did not need to hear John's rantings now. She needed let him express his feelings in his own way.

"Talk to me Frank. Let's go away from the others for a little bit. Just you and I."

They left them, she holding his hand tightly and John felt sickened by the pain he saw on her brother's face. Everytime he thought they had finished connecting the dots, another piece of the puzzle became unstuck and needed to be refit. How much more? He felt that strange compulsion to start laughing again. But quickly squashed it down. It was not disrespect and he didn't want it to appear like that. It was simply that suddenly the key players or most of them anyway, for the entire stargate programme, were suddenly at his fingertips, and all found without one family unit - more of less. The implications were staggering and again he wondered at the manipulations that had occurred along the way to get everyone to this point in their lives.

"John..." He heard Callandra's voice and froze. Not sure if he wanted to talk to her now, but something had been playing around in his mind, something that had come to him as he watched Gina and Frank walk away together."

He turned abruptly and looked at her. She stood beside General Mitchell, both tall and imposing people, both carrying the ancient gene. One an ascended being. The other.. one day. "Tell me something Callandra. If Gina doesn't die in that accident... how does that not create ripples. If she doesn't die, then O'Neill's father doesn't die trying to save her, a hit and run drivers life isn't ruined... and so on..."

"Not so simple John. Think of it as a carefully woven fabric. If one thing is changed, then if you carefully replace the missing fabric the pattern can still be clear, if one understands how the process works. That is the only thing I can change. I have done the calculations and as you can imagine, it is as complex as a calculus equation. The accident will still take place..."

"You've chosen another to die in her place? How is that fair?"

"No John. Not die. Jack O'Neill senior will still die, but he will save the girl that will be in that same spot that Gina would have been. Her life will not change in any way as she was already in the accident also, and was the survivor. The only survivor other than the driver."

"So you only took out one small part of the equation and the answer still remains the same."

"The overall answer. But yes, for all intents and purposes, the answer is the same."

"Except for Gina."

"Yes John. Except for Gina. Nothing else changes. It has been carefully calculated."

He sensed then that Gina had returned with her brother. General Mitchell had not contributed to the conversation and John had the sense that he had already spent a good part of his morning talking things through with Frank and had little left in him to say.

"Time for you to go John..." He looked around sharply at Callandra's voice.

"John?" He heard panic in Gina's voice and knew that she was not ready for him to , _he_ was not ready to leave.

"If you don't go now John, there will be consequences. You know that."

"Gina - come with me." Panic filled his voice now. Suddenly it was not so clear cut. He couldn't leave her here. He _wouldn't _ leave her here. Simple.

"She can't leave yet John. She cannot leave for three more months. When that time comes, you will come back for her."

He felt her cling to him then, and knew that separation would be a physical pain. Wildly he cast his eyes around this small intimate clearing, surrounded by her family, the brilliant green foliage and the sound of the falls as they fell to the limitless depths of the small pool. And looked at the falls, innocous, innocent but the door to another time. His time. Without her.

"Gina..." He reached out a hand and found it unsteady and not wanting to appear weak in front of her family he hardened his resolve. He did not want her to see his insecurities either. She would have enough to deal with when he left. His strength would at least be his gift to her. "Come here love, it's only three months. You need that time with your family. They need that time to say goodbye. Those are the only loose threads you will allowed to tie up. You know that don't you. Nothing else must change. Please Gina, stick to the rules and in three months I'll come back and get you."

She clung to him them and felt her shuddering breaths and when he turned her face up her eyes were bleak. She found a smile for him. "Thank you. For the past few days. For the one night. Thank you." And those simple words were the undoing of him and he held her tight and her father, her brother - turned away slightly to allow them their privacy. Oblivious to them he dropped his mouth onto hers, hard and fierce and tasted the salt of her tears and the taste that was her. The kiss stirred memories and more than just a small amount of need and he didn't fight it, let it ride to the surface and if there had been no witnesses to their goodbye, he would have had her on the ground and there would be nothing between them, just hot skin and passion... his hand crept to her breasts and he touched her , none to gently to hear her moan and then whispered to her. "One night... October 15th... you're mine..." He pulled himself away and flicking a salute at the two men, both of whom stood to attention and returned the respect and slanted a quick glance to Callandra he stepped

behind the waterfall. Purple light, pulsing and bright and he was gone. Colonel John Sheppard had left 1962. And it was with a cry that Gina collapsed onto the ground and lay there unmoving, while her father and brother hovered uncertainly around her. Only Callandra stood there with a knowing look.


	28. Chapter 28 Something Missing

CHAPTER 28 – SOMETHING MISSING

Small sharp rocks dug into his face and he felt the cold immediately. No face full of sand this time. _P8T198. _Home. Back in the Pegasus galaxy. Blearily he peered around him in the half light that seemed to perpetually fall over this bleak planet. He was alone, obviously they had not expected his arrival. No problem. Get to the gate, dial Atlantis and step back. Back to where? Home.

And then it hit him like a sucker punch. He had left her there. Albeit she could come here in three months, but that seemed a life time. Especially since it felt he had just lived a lifetime in the past few days. He stumbled across the rocky ground, remembering the general direction of the stargate and when he saw the stargate for the first time in so many days, he paused and found himself smiling, then laughing. The damn stargate. The glue that held this and all other universes together. After all, he had just been the one that had had to glue all the pieces back together.

He dialled the gate, pulled out his personal IDC which he kept on him at all times and waited until the event horizon had settled before keying in his personal IDC. He no longer had his radio – just had to hope really that Atlantis were quick to recognise his IDC and open the shield to allow his access. He tossed one look over his shoulder, in the direction of the stone portal that had sent him back to find a woman who had managed to weave her way into his heart, then stepped through the gate. Back to Atlantis.

He simply stood when he arrived, stood quietly in the gate room and using his eyes only, he surveyed the surrounding room and flicking them upwards, took in the personnel who stood in the control room looking down. Several marines stood with their weapons trained on him, waiting on instructions to stand down. Elizabeth and two gate technicians stood in the control room, Elizabeth had a smile on her face and held her hand up in a wave, but he couldn't seem to find the strength to acknowledge her.

"Stand down gentlemen. It's me. Really."

The marines remained uncertain and it was Major Lorne stepping into the gate room repeating the same command that had them finally dropping their weapons and shuffling a little. Feeling just a little uneasy at having to show distrust to a superior officer.

"Sorry about that Colonel Sheppard. As you know, we couldn't take the chance that you had been compromised. Especially when Rodney and Ronon came hightailing it back with the story of the century. You know how Rodney is, Sir?"

"Yeah Lorne... about that... God. I'm so tired." He just stood and dragged his hand through his hair and down his still unshaven face. "And this needs some serious attention!" Rubbing against the growth it make a rasping unpleasant sound and Major Lorne grimaced.

"With all due respect sir... I couldn't agree more!"

John grinned then. He _was_ home. And he would bring her back, but he belonged here – in this time and doing what he did best. Out chasing aliens and flying spaceships – to put it in simple terms, for afterall, these were his simple pleasures. He had spent some time in 1962 questioning his reasons for doing what he did, but that was another time. This was his time and where he was meant to be. His smile grew as he imagined all the things he could show Gina when she got there.

"John. It's good to see you." Elizabeth as always was slightly reserved, standing back slightly to watch his mood before speaking to him. Having ascertained that he was indeed in a reasonably good mood, she stepped closer, peered at his unshaven dangerous looking face and thought better of it. "No shavers in 1962, Colonel?"

"It was indeed an interesting year Elizabeth, and you'll be amazed at some of the things I discovered. Really! Kinda blew me away. But first, sleep, shower and shave and I'm not sure of the order these will come in.. then we can do the debrief. It'll be a doozy, I'll warn you now. I'll also warn you... I'm bringing back someone from 1962. There were conditions to what I had to do – anicent conditions, so the choice was never mine to make. But she's coming here, to be with me. In three months. If anything official needs to be done on earth to sort this out, it could be tricky – turns out she's related to half the people who are involved in the stargate programme... except me, thank god! Anyway, I'm going. Now. 2012. Wow. I came back and everything's still the same. I think?" Muttering to himself now, he left the gate room, Elizabeth watching him shaking her head. And not looking forward to the debrief.

He walked into his private quarters. The shower and shave could wait. Suddenly his bed looked mightly fine at the moment and walking toward it he managed to find the strength to pull off his boots and that was about it. He simply rolled backwards, punched his pillow and rolled over, sighing a little. Sleep – for just a while, then it would be time to deal with all the questions that Elizabeth would no doubt have for him, and the ones he still had for himself.

He slept deep and hard and was plagued a little with dreams that hovered on the edge of his consciousness. Not really there, just fragments and tiny pieces. He struggled to reach out and pull them in, assuming that they were somehow important. He tossed restlessly once he realised that they remained out of reach, and when he awoke the bed was empty and that didn't sit right with him. He had reached out automatically for her body, sure it would be there beside him, here in this timeline, and when he rubbed the residual of sleep from his eyes and rolled over and saw indeed that she remained in her own time.

Something moved then. Something dark, shifting slightly inside him and he took a deep breath. And felt suddenly that something was wrong. Not here.. there. Something was wrong. Panic set in, and he hurried through his cleanup, staring without seeing, into the slightly fogged mirror as he attempted to shave. He reached out a hand to wipe it clear, saw the darkness that still sat in his eyes and blinked once, twice – but it remained. A nervous energy filled him now, and hearing a knock at the door he quickly moved towards it, activating the door release to show Ronon on the other side, a bemused look on his face.

"Sheppard. Back in one piece I see. Home." He reached out a hand to give John a friendly punch on the shoulder, pulling back at the last minute when he saw the expression in his friend's eyes.

"John? What's up? Thought you'd be glad to be back. We've got missions piling up with our name on them." Ronon rarely missed anything and now he took in the suppressed energy and the way John's eyes flickered restlessly, rather than settle on anything and felt instant concern.

"You been to see Carson yet? Been checked out to make sure that this time travel stuff hasn't screwed you up in any way?" Finally John's eyes settled on him and he shook his head and Ronon felt a quick flicker of relief when John finally spoke.

"I feel 'off' Ronon. Felt fine when I stepped through the gate. Home. Yeah. But now? Something's off kilter. Wrong. Maybe I will go and see the doc."

"I'll come with you Sheppard. Make sure you don't get lost." John missed the worried look he tossed back at his friend and the worry stayed on Ronon's face as they made their way through the hallway to the infirmary. He lounged negligently against the wall near the back of the infirmary while Dr Beckett gave John a full work up, and kept his eyes on them the whole time. Not that he didn't trust the doctor – hell, he'd certainly patched him up more than one time, but this time travel thing, it was nothing they had any knowledge of and that was always of concern. Meddling in things that knew nothing about. Pretty much par for the course here in Atlantis.

"I can't see anything physical Colonel. All your vital signs are fine. Heart's doing as well as can be expected considering you've been back and forward in time, fifty years to be exact. We would think that this would have some sort of effect on your body, but I gave Rodney and Ronon a thorough checking over when they came back through and I found nothing in either of them. You said you felt a little 'off'? Is that something like those famous spidey senses of yours?"

He smiled, to show that he was partly joking but his keen eyes watched for John's reaction. The Colonel did seem a little quiet and his reflexes were a little slower than normal – but tiredness could play a part in that.

"Yeah, 'off' doc, like a little piece of me is not there – missing. Like I didn't come back with all the right bits..."

"I can assure you Colonel Sheppard, that all the right bits are most certainly in the right places, at least as far as I can see. I don't really know what to tell you. Could be just a bit of diorientation – did you feel something similar when you arrived? You would likely experience something like that more so than Rodney and Ronon, mainly because you had been sent there precisely to do a job – and there were several connections that related to you in particular." Carson paused and made a few notes onto a sheet of paper and turned it around so that John could see it.

"Presentism and Eternalism – heard of these John?"

John rolled his eyes. Another lecture. Great. "Sorry Doc – you're talking philosophy here, major debates on the whys and wherefores of past, present and modern culture. Not really relevant?"

"Actually John, entirely relevant. After effects of what you have just been through. According to Presentism, time is an ordering of various realities. At a certain time some things exist and others do not. This is the only reality we can deal with and we cannot for example say that John exists because at the present time he does not. An Eternalist, on the other hand, holds that time is a dimension of reality on a par with the three spatial dimensions, and hence that all things—past present and future—can be said to be just as real as things in the present are. According to this theory, then, John really does exist, though we must still use special language when talking about somebody who exists at a distant time—just as we would use special language when talking about something a long way away (the very words near, far, above, below, over there, and such are directly comparable to phrases such as in the past, a minute ago, and so on). Getting it yet?"

Ronon from his vantage point simply rolled his eyes. Worse than one of Rodney's lectures. At least that had a point. Like an end result. This? Not so much.

John nodded. "I get it doc. I'm having difficulty dealing with the fact that I interacted with people then, and these same people had ties to people I interact with now. The various realities as opposed to three spacial dimensions. Past present and future. And just thinking about how all those realities tied in together nearly did my head in then, and it's not getting any better the more I think about it now."

Elizabeth had walked in then and heard the last part of Carson's conversation. "In four days John, you dealt with three different realities, and while it could be likened to dimension changes – I think your mind had to change the way it processed things in order to deal with everything. I want to hear everything John, as succintly as you can – this is going to be one mission report that is going to set earth on it's ear – especially as it relates to some of the personnel over at the SGC now. You'll need to have it clear in your mind, so start now. From the beginning."

And John sat on the bed in the infirmary and did just that. Swinging his legs lightly as he dredged back in his mind for events that happened fifty years ago, but in his reality – four days ago. Presentalism and Eternalism. What the hell did it matter. Whatever the result. He left something behind. But didn't know yet what that was, just knew that when he figured it out. Then another thought occurred to him.

_Left something behind? Maybe I brought something back with me... something I shouldn't have. Out of reach... _


	29. Chapter 29 Or Something Brought Back?

CHAPTER 29 – OR SOMETHING BROUGHT BACK...

He got through the first week. It had been a long debrief with Elizabeth. They had moved from the infirmary to the conference room and had been joined by Rodney, Zelenka and Teyla – all of whom had been fascinated by the play of events that had necessitated his trip back in time. Elizabeth had made careful notes. While the onus of the mission report fell more or less on John's shoulder's, she was the one who was perhaps a little more wary of including all pertinent details while John sometimes had the not so appreciated knack of leaving out data he simply did not wish to include. And she suspected that he would intentionally blur as much of this one as he could.

She sat in her office now, one week later, reading back through the notes that she had made. The report had not been forthcoming yet and she knew that she would have to get onto John about that. She also knew why he was dragging his heels on this one. Include too much information, and he could affect some changes in their future that he was not supposed to. But include not enough, and some serious red flags would start flying back on earth. So far news of his latest escapade had not gotten back to the SGC and by keeping it under wraps for now she was giving them the time to find the best way to put it into it's written form. For posterity.

John and Ronon had just finished sparring. Ronon, still worried a little about John, had noted that he seemed more himself this morning and dragged him off to the sparring room to make sure that he stayed on his game. More or less like old times. John took a bashing and now sat in the middle of the floor, a derisive smile on his face, blood streaming from a small wound on his forehead. Again. Ronon was a formidable component with the sticks and John, while improving considerably over the years, would likely never be in the big man's class. Consequently, he came away with various injuries and with no sympathy whatsoever from Ronon.

Holding a towel to the wound now, the two friends left the sparring room, heading in the direction of the mess. Food and coffee. And that brief flash of Gina as he thought of coffee... and the last cup they had shared in her kitchen that morning. This was by no means his first flash... she had been on his mind constantly during that week, but in order to get on and do his work, he tried to compartmentalise their relationship for now – at least during the day. At night he lay in bed somewhat restless, and let her lovely soft body come to him in his dreams. Hell, it was better than nothing.

The sound of a dog barking broke him from his small reverie, and he heard Rodney's surprised voice as they met up with him just before arriving at the mess door.

"Was that a dog I heard? I thought pets were forbidden in Atlantis?" He gave Sheppard and Ronon a quizzical glance, shaking his head when he saw the wound on John's forehead. "Aaah, I see you let Ronon beat you up again. When are you going to learn Sheppard? He's bigger than you..."

John smiled, then froze in place as a small white dog came hurtling around the corner, caught sight of him and started barking excitedly.

"What the hell?" A mental picture flashed in John's mind. Waking up on the beach in Hawaii, the sound of her voice, and the sound of the dog barking... running up to him with a ball in his mouth.

_Gina's dog. Crap! Gina's dog. But... what happened to Gina's dog? It was there the first day... then gone. I never saw it again. She never mentioned the dog again. It was just not there anymore. What the hell? Like it ceased to exist back there, the day after I arrived..."_

Ronon put a hand to his shoulder. "You Ok Sheppard? You look like you've seen a ghost."

"I think I have Ronon. Something's wrong. Something's very wrong. Rodney?"

Rodney was looking from the dog to John, a puzzled expression on his face. "I don't like the look on your face Sheppard. That dog came from earth, from the time portal, didn't it? I know damn well there are no dogs here in Atlantis." And as if to prove his theory, he starting promptly sneezing and backed away a little from the small while dog who sat at John's feet gazing up at him expectantly.

John keyed his radio. "Elizabeth. You need to come down here now. We've got a problem. Those ripples in time I talked about? One of them is sitting in front of me now. With doggy breath. Aah crap..."


	30. Chapter 30 Time Rift

CHAPTER 30 – TIME RIFT

They sat in Elizbeth's office now and it was getting a little crowded. She debated moving them to the large conference room, especially as the door continued to open as yet another fascinated Lantien member decided that this was too good a science fiction story to miss. Levity? She pondered the reason for it here. There should be nothing humorous in what was sitting before them all now.

The small dog sat at John's feet. It had refused to leave his side, almost as though the dog sensed that he was his only tie with his correct time line. And his missing mistress. There was indeed, a keen intelligence in the small canine's eyes and Elizabeth wondered just how much information an animal stored in it's brain. Likely more than they gave it credit for.

John's eyes while bleak, still managed a spark of humour when he saw all the people crowded into the room. "Looks like the gangs all here Elizabeth. It's a shame we didn't have Dr Who with us – he'd have the perfect explanation for why this has happened, and could maybe give us a heads up whether we can expect any other unpleasant surprises."

As if taking offence to being called an 'unpleasant surprise' the little white dog cocked his head and made a small yipping sound, bringing a smile from Elizabeth. "Not this little guy's fault Colonel. Looks like he wants to go home and seems to think you know the way. Rodney. We need some help here. What could you find in the ancient data base. Just what the hell are we dealing with here and can we expect anything worse than this."

"Quite frankly Elizabeth, I think you're all a little naïve if you think you can simply travel back in time fifty years and leave no imprint whatsoever. I don't care whether the device, the time portal – was designed by ancients. They are not infallible – we've certainly managed to learn that the hard way. They've made grave errors in both judgement and in the design of some of their technology. Hell, we know that much of it was still in an experimental stage when they left Atlantis. We know this because the data base for such technology is essentially incomplete." Rodney glanced around the room, saw the interest on all their faces and continued.

"We've screwed up also. I know I call the ancients arrogant, and for the most part I stand by that – but we've been equally arrogant and it's not often I will admit to arrogance..." There was a small chuckle around the room. The scientist was well known for his arrogant and often obnoxious ways, but he was an extremely gifted scientist, not just in his own field of astro physics, but had chosen to become more than proficient in other fields as well.

"You all know that time travel is theoretical, at least back on earth. But there is some basis to the theory and some repercussions that even if we haven't technically proved ourselves yet, we have a pretty good idea that these would be a given. There is talk about cracks in time – this is likely what the ancients discovered and designed their portal around – but in theory, these are actually two parts of space and time that should never have touched. They are present in the very fabric of spacetime - a crack that appeared to be part of a wall would still be there if the wall were removed. Some cracks act like wormholes and could be opened to allow a passage between the places on either side. Regardless of the size and what was on the other side, and if handled incorrectly they could erase people and events.Some cracks release energy of pure time able to wipe individuals from time itself and remove events from history, however smaller, inconsequential things could be erased as well, including, perhaps, a dog from a persons life. I think this is what has happened here. The ancients have tried to control the rift, but there is still an unguarded portion so to speak, and when John came through it he left it open, unguarded – but because it was very small, only a small object could come through – such as a dog."

Rodney sat back now. He had spent the last hour researching what he knew about theoretical time travel and stretching his mind back to some of his physics lectures where he had had great enjoyment in baiting one of his tutors who firmly believed that the theory would never become more than theoretical. If he could use the time portal himself, he would go back to his days in these lectures and explain to the obnoxious professor, just how damn wrong he was.

"So, my fault. I left the door open. Does that dumb it down enough McKay?"

"Pretty much Sheppard. Although not your fault as there are no operating instructions or manuals for most of the ancient technology. Half the problem really. We wing it, we test it and if there are consequences, we suffer them. In this case, not just from our time – consequences may have been effective in both times."

"What do I do?" John absently reached down and petted the dog, who now sat comfortably at his feet. "I can't go back until October. If I do, I'll likely cause more damage. And when I go back next time, we need to find a way to close the door behind me, so that nothing else can slip through. But... if I close the door, how the hell do I get back?" He rubbed his forehead, then winced when he remembered the wound that was still there, uncovered and unattended. "Ok, so sore head again, and not just your fault Ronon. Brain ache. And Rodney? Don't tell me such a thing doesn't exist. Because having experienced it several times in that past couple of weeks, I am more than convinced that it is an actual condition. And if it's not yet? Then consider it officially invented."

His aggrieved comments brought a small smile to Rodney's face. "Firstly, you need to go to earth – most the of the main players in your little game are on earth. Mitchell is still heading SG1 – Sam is working in area 51 and Jack is in DC. Get those three players together at the SGC for a meeting. Make sure that there are no discrepancies in this time. I'll come with you, I know the players as well as you do. We know that you didn't affect anything from the stargate programme – no one has noticed anything unusual or wrong this week with any operational equipment or work here in Atlantis. I think the rift was a small one as I said, and there will only be small things that have been affected or pulled through into this time line. The only problem is one's definition of small. Some small items are important, and that is dumbing it down again. And if they come here? They no longer exist there..."

There were some serious faces not the least Elizabeth. She had understood easily what Rodney had said and had some serious reservations herself as soon as Ronon and Rodney had come back and told her that John was doing some ancient meddling fifty years in the past. But there hadn't been a lot she could do about it then. The damage had already been done, but she mentally cursed the ancients and their damn meddling and the fact that they got involved in things that they had no right to affect. Lives. Emotions. It may have been a small thing bringing a dog through to this timeline. But what change had occurred on earth fifty years in the past when the dog disappeared?

Sheppard was right. Your brain could hurt.


	31. Chapter 31 Hawaii 1962

CHAPTER 31 – HAWAII 1962

They had arrived at her side in seconds after she had crumpled to the ground, alarmed at how pale she appeared. It was only Callandra who saw John vanish into the flash of purple light, the time portal opening only wide enough to let him through before closing again, effectively sealing him from this time and the woman who lay on the ground. Callandra felt the shift in the time as the portal closed and felt the connections that he had left behind, strengthen and knew with a smile, that he had accomplished what he had been pulled back here to do. And more. Turning back her attention to the woman on the ground. So much more, than even she herself had foreseen.

_It seems some things are not for all eyes Callandra. There are those higher up who chose for you not to witness this, and some of the other events to come. Because it is your family? Or because they know of what you have already attempted to change and do not approve. I need to recalculate some of the time fragments to make sure that all is still on track, and perhaps then I can discover the new threads. For I suspect there are many..._

Callandra spoke now, calmly. "Bring her to my cottage Nate, Frank. She will be fine. She has had a shock, it has been more than time that was displaced this morning. Effectively by John leaving as he did, her emotions were partially severed – this is difficult to understand, but you have to remember that she had never met him before he arrived here a few days ago – he did not exist in this time, and cannot exist in this time. It is impossible to exist from the future in the past for more than a short period of time. You saw this Frank when you looked at John. You saw the blurring of the edges?" She watched as Frank nodded his head. "He had already been here too long – any longer and he would begin to lose integrity, substance here and there is the very real possibilty that he would have ceased to exist in either time. It is a delicate thing."

Her brother looked up at her sharply, having just lifted his daughter into his arms and was turning to leave the area. "Won't the same be true for Gina if she moves forward into his time?'

"No Nate, because she would no longer exist here anyway. She dies, as harsh as that sounds when I say it. If she did not die, then she could not move forward. You cannot exist in two time dimensions at once. That is the conundrum that affects time travel."

"Let's deal with this later Jennifer. I need to make sure she is all right. You said her emotions were partially severed. Does that mean she will not remember him?"

Callandra/Jennifer walked alongside her men. "She will remember him when she seems him again, but the connection has partially severed now also. He has begun to blur for her in her memory now, just as his physical form had begun to blur."

"Why is that not happening for us then? Why do we still remember him?" Frank shook his head as he tried to grapple with impossibly difficult concepts.

"You didn't share the connection that she did with him. It was strong – it is strong, incredibly so and this could also have problems I did not foresee. I knew that they would meet this way, encouraged it, so that he could take her back to Atlantis to continue her life line. I knew also, that when he left her behind here for a short time, that connection would weaken for the time they were apart. For her anyway. Not for John – his ancient gene is too strong for that, Gina does not carry the gene."

They had reached her cottage and Nate took her inside and lay her on Jennifer's bed. He still thought of this woman as his sister Jennifer, could not begin to think of her in any other terms, even when she spoke of things that he did not understand. She was just Jen, the girl he had grown up teasing, sometimes hating but always loving. Hard to comprehend that she hid another inside her, one that controlled her. One that changed her? He didn't want to think too much about that.

"What problems Jen... you need to come clean with us here. If we've got any hope of understanding what the hell is going on, and what the hell to expect – you need to tell us everything you know. Bits and pieces are not going to fill in the blanks. This storyline is already filled with more holes than swiss cheese. I need to know more."

Jennifer drew up a blanket up over her neice, touching her face gently as if registering the life signs in there. "I am worried a little Nate. I would prefer not to have told you this – you know I've tried to protect you all your life?" Jen was the older one, and she had been the one to protect him. From hurting himself, from getting into trouble with their father who had been a tough man to please, from his teacher when he constantly forgot to do his homework. She had been there, always watching his back and he assumed that's just what big sisters did.

"When he came, it was not without consequence."

"Explain Jen. In simple terms."

"Her dog is gone." Jennifer looked at him sharply to gauge his reaction.

"What dog? She never had a dog!"

"Yes she did Nate. She and her dog, Angel – they were inseparable, especially after the problems with the O'Neill boy. But after John arrived, the dog was suddenly gone. Erased from this time line. And you, Gina and everyone else who had known that dog, will now have no memory of it ever existing in her life."

"Damn Jen – that is not funny!"

"It's not a joke Nate. Frank? There are things called rifts in time – like a ocean rip, if you get caught in one it drags you out. A time rift is similar – a small doorway, usually very small where something can get through, from one time to the next. Only small things, and usually never noticed because they are often of little consequence and affect things seldomly in either the time they have left or the time they have arrived in. Gina's dog is gone. No doubt it is now in John's time line. Little consquence perhaps, except in this case, it signifies something more. Another connection lost. I told you she would be fine... now I am not so sure. There are other things at work here that I'm at a loss to understand. I need to recalculate, get things into perspective."

"Jen – if something happens to Gina – we've got little enough time left with her as it is! You told us the only way to save her mortal form was to send her back with John, just before her accident. And now you're saying she's no longer safe here? Just where the hell does that leave us? You need to contact Sheppard, get him back here. He'll sort it out."

Nate paced around the room angrily while Frank watched broodingly from the bedroom doorway. "Dad. I don't think Sheppard can come back. I doubt he would have been able to come back in three months as Aunt Jen had originally said. I think what she's trying to say, is that the rules have changed again. Am I right Aunt Jen?"

Jennifer sank down onto the bed beside her niece and running a hand softly over her face she felt something shift and saw the transclucent texture of her skin.

"The connection is weakening Frank – because part of her is already in Atlantis with John. He inadvertedly took her life thread back with him. It is unravelling. I don't understand the why or the how, I just know that it is."

"What can you do Jen. I won't sit here and watch her die through your meddling. You need to do something, and do it now!"

General Nathaniel Mitchell pulled himself up to his full height as he felt his own ancient genes begin to stir. "I'll take her there myself, and damn the consequences Jen. Damn them."


	32. Chapter 32 Without a Paddle

CHAPTER 32 – WITHOUT A PADDLE

John and Rodney stepped through the gate arriving at the SGC just six hours later. Partial quarantine had been at the half way station and this had John, fidgety and nervous and Rodney casting anxious glances at him.

"Sheppard! You're more antsy than normal. Something I need to know?"

"Can't get that feeling out of my head. Tilting, off balance. Something's shifted. I thought when I left Atlantis it would go away. Can't seem to shake the damn feeling."

Rodney was pensive. "Ok Sheppard, one thing at a time. Check out how things are on earth, then we'll go from there. Gina?" Rodney hated to ask, hated to see the lost look come into the Colonel's eyes.

"God, I hope not Rodney. I just don't know."

They had left Gina's dog in Elizabeth's care much to her delight. Given the no pets rule in Atlantis, she had had to leave behind her beloved dog with her partner Simon, and more often than not, missed his furry companionship. She was more than happy to take this little one under her wing for a short time. Elizabeth had also contacted the SGC to arrange an emergency meeting with Jack O'Neill, Cameron Mitchell and Samantha Carter and while it would take Sam a couple of hours to get to the SGC, Elizabeth had been assured that given the urgency of the meeting, they would all be on hand to meet John and Rodney when they arrived.

Jack was the first to step forward and shake their hands when they stepped through and Rodney's gaze was drawn instantly to Samantha Carter whom he had been not so secretly in love with for most of the time he had been involved with the stargate programme. He had mistakenly assumed that she felt the same way, never imagining that she had been involved with an infatuation of her own. That of her commanding officer, then known as Colonel Jack O'Neill. However, relationships were discouraged in the military if there was a direct chain of command and they had respected this. It wasn't until Sam had been offered work at Area 51 and she had stepped down from the SGC that they had publicly acknowledged their mutual attraction – much to Rodney's disgust.

John would have normally enjoyed teasing Rodney openly about this, in fact given most opportunities, he had managed to do so. However his feelings of unease had grown with his arrival at the SGC and he was now seated in the conference room, a rather concerned Jack O'Neill hovering beside him.

"Sheppard? Are you sure that little time travel stunt you pulled didn't scramble your brain? You look like crap!"

_Love you too General!_ Was John's mental reply, but aloud he said. "Sir – feeling like it also.. Carson cleared me medically, apart from a bunch of philosophical conditions called presentism and … something else I can't even begin to remember..."

The general held up crossed fingers to ward off further technical explanations. He was well known for his intense dislike of anything too technical. O'Neill like the KIS theory – Keep It Simple and that was the code he lived by. John respected that.

"Ok kids – Elizabeth gave me the dumbed down version, knew that Rodney here would take great pleasure in confusing the crap out of me, so I'm in the loop – so to speak. But still confused. I'm me – but perhaps you think that I'm not anymore...hmmm?"

In spite of himself, John managed to huff out a laugh. O'Neill did that to him. Found the humour in most situations and pushed that forward first as a smoke screen. Made you think he was a harmless clown, then wham – went in for the kill. The man was innately skilled in that particular tactic. And John was not fooled. He knew exactly how much intelligence lurked behind those brown eyes and looking into them now, John took a relieved breath. He was still Jack O'Neill. One down – two to go...

Cam said nothing – just watched John. Cam was a player, always in the game, often flouting the rules but always getting the results. Bad ass flyboy who had saved his own ass more than once during missions in desert storm. Hell if there wasn't a debt or two there! He looked deeper into the man's eyes now, saw just Cam, same 'good ole boy' and knew that another thread was still pulled tight.

He felt the pain in his head that threatened to explode, saw Rodney partially push himself to get out of his chair and to get to John's side, but it was Sam who got there first, her clear blue eyes looking down assessingly into his, hand picking up his wrist to check his pulse – medical training coming automatically to her. He jolted as her hand touched his skin. Not Sam. Sam was different. And the chasm opened, shifted and sucked him in before sealing itself back up again. And he was left in no man's time without a paddle...


	33. Chapter 33 The Dark

CHAPTER 33 – THE DARK

He tumbled head over heels, until there came a time where he no longer knew up from down. Still dark. And no idea where he was. But trapped, without a doubt. His last memory was of Sam Carter looking down into his eyes and knowing instantly that another consequence had occurred as a result of his little quest to meddle in the past. He had managed to avoid all other time travel effects but this one, and knew immediately why the connection with Gina had changed Samantha Carter.

And as he tumbled over and over through that dark place, he saw the change that had occurred in the playing field as the quarterback stepped up to the team and cited a new plan for the third quarter. Oh yeah, the rules had changed.

When Gina died in that car accident, Jacob had come back to Hawaii for her funeral. He was supposed to meet a woman during his return to Hawaii, the woman who would become Samantha's mother. They would commence a long distance relationship, then when he received his next promotion, he had asked her to move to Florida to become his wife and in 1968, Samantha Carter had come into this world. As did all fairy tales, this one began "one upon a time..." How did they normally end. John couldn't remember.

His connection with Gina. _Ah_, thought John –_ the real conundrum. The very centre of that giant ball of wool and all threads led back to this. Me and Gina. We are the real story, not the stargate programme. That was the smokescreen. Me and Gina. Gina and I. The King and Queen on the chess board protected by our knights, our rooks and our pawns. What is our real purpose? Why did the ancients lead me back to meet her. Subterfuge, obfiscate and plausible denial. And dangerous liasons._

He continued to tumble through the darkness that had no end not knowing that Gina inhabited the same space and time that he did right now. Chasing her own demons through the dark. She had lost her connection with her own time and with him, just as he had lost his connection with his time. And her. They floated in this black space, occupied together this dark chasm where no souls could meet, where truths were found and denied. The game room. Who would bring who back?

He continued his musings in his dark prison. Jennifer had fallen out with Nat over her interference in their lives as an ancient and Jacob had not come back for the funeral – the funeral that had still taken place as for all intents and purposes it still needed to appear that she had died in that timeline. Jacob had eventually met another woman. A woman who lived in Florida. A woman of the ancient's choosing, one who they felt was more suited to his needs and their requirements. Sam had still been born, but she now only had one half of the gene pool she should have had. Of what importance was that? Who was Sam's mother?

Then he knew without a doubt why the connection had changed and with this knowledge came a glimmer of light and he fought towards it now, knowing if he didn't he would be trapped here in the abyss forever. As he moved toward that sliver of light he felt her then...for the first time – and knew that she fought the same battle that he did, right now.

_I know that you don't have the same strength as I do sweetheart, you don't hold the ancient gene. I can't help you from here, I can only fight my own battle. Please Gina, let Callandra guide you out, I can't help you – I wish I could. Stay strong, we'll find a way to be together._

He fought upward, closer to the light now and struggled to connect the next series of puzzles. Jacob had married Catherine. The same Catherine, who as a little girl had watched her father dig up the stargate in Egypt, many years ago. And the same Catherine who had recruited Daniel Jackson, a flakey anthropologist whose controversial views surmising that the ancient pyramids of Egypt were in fact landing pads for alien spacecraft. Turns out he had been right all along. As Jack O'Neill and SG1 had discovered.

It was John's laughter that pushed him out of the dark and back into the light, freed by this final connection. Now all the major players were together. And how did this change affect Sam Carter. Jack had to believe – hell, hoped! - that it was for the better. Or the ball of yarn that had suddenly started to take on the correct shape, would unravel faster than he could put it back together.

When he awoke it was in the infirmary with a worried semi circle of people hovering around him. His voice didn't work too well, almost as though he had forgotten how to use it.

"Hail mary of all time! Quarterback just threw me the ball. Fourth quarter's about to begin..."

Rodney chuckled. "Good to have you back Sheppard. Scared the crap out of us! You were muttering about giant balls of yarn and unprotected sex."

"I was?" He shot a surprised glance at Rodney. "Oh crap... I was! Gina's in trouble. We have to get her out of 1962. Cam, Sam – she's closest to the two of you connection wise, she's a part of you. You've got to help her. To get out. She can't do it alone and I don't know if Callandra is going to be able to help her. If she doesn't this whole game play comes crashing down like a ton of lego bricks.

"Ok son, lie back and rest a bit. You're not making any sense..." General O'Neill decided it was time to assert some much needed authority around here before it became apparent that he would have to have his junior officer carted off to the nut house. It appeared he was beginning to lose it – at least in the General's mind. KIS – not so much at the moment, and the General was not a happy camper.

It was Cam who spoke in John's defence. "Actually sir, he does make sense. I know what needs to be done. The rift Sheppard? They need to find the rift, get her through the rift. You were wrong. It wasn't something you opened when you came through. The rift has always been there, between their time and ours. The time portal? That wasn't the fail safe. The rift was. Small enough so that nothing of importance could get hrough, but at a pinch? Gina's only a little thing by your own account. The rift was torn into time for this very purpose. The portal can't be used. She doesn't have the gene and Callandra can't activate it. She's tried."

"You've been in contact?" John sounded hopeful.

"Not so much – just tendrils. You get the drift, Sheppard?"

"Yeah, I get it.. Cam?"

"Yeah?" Cam looked at him, seeing the pensive look on Sheppard's face.

"That time in Afghanistan, when you stopped that suicide bomber from killing our whole platoon, just before I got the chopper out. How did you know?"

Cam gave a small smile. "There was a monkey riding on my shoulders, Sheppard."

"Yeah, thought so... Why can't she go through the waterfall... oh yeah, ancient gene thing and I guess I can't go back that way. With the connections all repaired, the portal will be closed from this side, only the rift is left. Getting your point loud and clear Mitchell..."

The other man smiled "Rest, Sheppard. We'll bring her back to you..." and saw the knowing looking that flickered in Cam's eyes. Ancient genes – in spades. From dear old granddad – obviously skipped a generation. But he closed his eyes, not afraid of the dark this time and let himself rest for a precious time. He may have closed all the connections to 1962 but he suspected a few more surprises might be coming his way in 2012.

_Repercussions...and in the words of William Shakespeare "I say there is no darkness but ignorance."_


	34. Chapter 34 Gina's Dark

CHAPTER 34 – GINA'S DARK

She didn't see John in the dark abyss, thought it was hers to occupy alone. But like John, she saw the threads, the connections and knew that while he had completed what he set out to do, there had been consequences. It had been engineered that they would meet – Callandra. But Callandra had not foreseen that this had been the larger picture anyway. Smokescreens and subterfuge. She saw them, just as John had done. But she did not have the clarity that John had from his ancient gene so confusion wound it's insipid fingers through her head and she simply floated, lost – in this dark abyss.

She heard the sound of a dog barking and felt her forehead wrinkle slightly in this vacuumless place. A dog? A tiny sliver of memory flittered just on the edge of her consciousness and for just a brief moment she recollected a small white dog … with wings? Angel? Who was Angel and why did that name suddenly seem so important?

The barking grew louder and she looked around her dark area frantically now, sure that the dog was near. She felt something soft brush up against her leg and reaching down with one hand she felt the soft fur of an animal and the barking became more frantic, more excited. Angel? The name crept into her mind again and she struggled to pull on the tenuous strings that floated past, knew that they were somehow important... but she was so tired. She didn't know if she had the strength to either pull on those strings or find her way out of there.

But Angel did... again, the thought came unbidden to her and suddenly there was another voice in her mind. Aunt Jen. Her father.

"Follow Angel, Gina – she will lead you out of the dark."

"I'm scared Aunt Jen? I don't know where I am. The last place I remember is the waterfall... John was leaving – John left! Oh God, he's gone, hasn't he?" She pulled his picture into her mind and felt more than just a little unease when she saw that her mental picture of him had become blurry and indistinct. "I can't see him clearly – is something wrong with him? Why is he no longer clear?"

Jennifer's voice seemed to come from a great distance but she took comfort from it anyway. "John went back to his own timeline, but there are problems. The portal has closed – we did not foresee this. He completed his task and it had been preset that it would not open again – one form of fail safe to make sure that people from the future did not go back and forth unnecessarily to cause ripples, and vice versa. Also, his connection to you. It weakens – he took part of your life thread back with him and it is stretched too tightly. You need to get to his timeline immediately or your life thread will snap. That is why you do not see him clearly anymore..."

"Tell me what to do Aunt Jen. Is Dad there? Can he hear me? I wanted to be able to say goodbye, I didn't want to leave like this..."

"I know Gina – you are so brave and I am so proud of you..." this was her Dad's voice now and there was a hitch in it as it caught and she knew he tried to keep his voice strong for her and not portray the fear he must also be feeling. "Frank's here too – we moved you to Jen's house – you collapsed at the waterfall, you're lying peacefully on the bed. I wish..."

He didn't get to finish. Angel was barking loudly now and she felt the nip of small teeth at her ankles and knew that she had to follow her dog. _Her dog?_ But needed these last moments with her family.

"My dog is here... my dog? Did anyone know that I have a dog... she's here, her name is Angel and I think she is here to guide me out of this dark. I'm trapped between timelines at the moment, aren't I? Because my thread is too thin for either time line?"

"Good girl – you are beginning to understand. Though even your university degree couldn't have helped working out this one... it's a doozy sweetheart!" Her dad's voice held amusement in it.

"Frank?" She needed to talk to her brother, needed to know that he was ok.

"I'm here squirt... you ok?"

His gruff voice made her giggle. He always pretended to be so tough, but just like their dad, he was really a big old pussy cat. "I'm going to meet your son soon... any words of wisdom for him?"

"Always the wiseass Gina... some things never change. Miss you kid... tell Sheppard if he doesn't treat you right I'll find that damn rift in time, squeeze through and find him. And wring his damn neck."

Gina did laugh now, her brother could always make her laugh... and cry. "I'm sure he's shaking in his combat boots Frank. Somehow, I don't think there's much that scares the Colonel. You may be a pussy cat dear brother... John? Pure steel..."

"Ok Gina, so did not need to hear that..."

She felt their love come through and knew also that somehow she would find a way to let them know that she was all right. There would be a way and she would do her best to find it.

Angel was pulling now and she bent down to pick up the little dog and hug her tightly. "You never forgot me, did you Angel... something happened and you were no longer there, I remember you now which means something has been fixed. Take me to him little friend... time to go..."

She closed her eyes now, no longer afraid of this dark, this time between times. Her feet moved through the molasses, thick and cloying and she kept her eyes closed but felt when the dark became light. A rushing feeling, then something was squeezing her tightly and she held her breath, not sure if she would fit or her bones would simply be crushed, then with a slight popping noise the air changed and she lay in the cold, on a hard floor. The air crackled and hissed around her, and there was purple light that pulsed on the edges of her tightly shut eyes, then silence.

She cautiously opened her eyes. The little dog struggled to get down but she held her tightly, not wanting to release this one connection to something that she knew. The floor beneath her was cold and hard and she put out her free hand cautiously to touch it. It felt like marble and in the darkness of the room that she was in, she struggle to make out shapes, struggled to give them clarity through the absolute darkness.

She had no idea where she was.


	35. Chapter 35 Home

CHAPTER 35 – HOME

John and Rodney stepped back through the stargate on Atlantis. He had spent a little time in the infirmary at the SGC at the insistence of the doctor there. They had been worried about him. He had concussion like symptons, appeared disorientated and slightly confused and it took more than just a little bit of coercion on his part for them to let him leave. He needed to get back to the Atlantis. And had no idea why.

The half way station had him fidgety and restless again and Rodney had huffed an impatient breath, a little sick of this new John Sheppard. He wanted the old one back. The confident arrogant one, who sometimes had little disregard for the things that Rodney said, but hey – anything was better than this new Sheppard. Too edgy and dangerous for his liking.

Elizabeth looked at them expectantly when they arrived. "So? Any dramatic changes to anything that I need to be made aware of? Anybody not who they seem – anything?" She peered closely into John's face, expecting to see some of the answers there, but saw only the same edginess that Rodney had been privy to for the past few hours. And took a step back. Like Rodney, she wanted the old John Sheppard back. Irreverent and funny. Annoying sometimes even – but their John, and the one they knew and loved. Seems this time travel escapade had taken some of his mojo. Or the woman had... one way or another, Elizabeth wanted it back!

"Only one change that I could see Elizabeth, at least that is before I did like a girl and fainted..."

"Using the F word Colonel – ha! Yeah, I guess that about describes it Elizabeth – he did actually faint – and yes, just like a girl." Rodney took great delight in relaying this information to Elizabeth, especially after the ribbing he had received from John when he himself had fallen to the same affliction. He preferred to call it a manly swoon – if such a thing existed. But fainting? Sounded a little too...girlish...for him.

"Are you sure you're all right John? Do you want to go and see Doctor Beckett?" Elizabeth's eyes immediately registered concern.

"I'm all out of patience for doctors and infirmary's. There's nothing there Elizabeth, at least nothing that any of their fancy machines can pick up. But something's here – in Atlantis. I felt it as soon as I stepped through."

Alarm flickered into Elizabeth's eyes. "Wraith John?"

_Wraith?_ Thought John. _ Once upon a time this would have been the first thing that had come to my mind also... not that long ago. There again, with that damn fairy tale... once upon a time... probably because I feel I'm trapped in some version of Hans Christian Anderson stories... perhaps I'll wake up and the princess will be kissing me... or will that mean I'll turn into a frog.. aah crap John – get your damn head in the game. This is no fairy tale. This is your life. Wraith? Nah... _

"Not having an in built wraith detector like Teyla, that I wouldn't know. But no, that's not what I meant. Actually, I don't know what I meant. Really. Just felt that shift in time again, and had the sudden thought that something came through. Something else has arrived."

Rodney peered into John's eyes. "You sure that fainting spell didn't scramble something in your head? There's no portal in Atlantis!"

"No Rodney, but there's a rift. Where did the dog come through. How did Angel get here? Elizabeth? Where is Angel?"

Elizabeth looked perplexed for a moment. " I don't know John. I let her out onto the pier a couple of hours ago to do her doggy business and have some fresh air, and she took off suddenly barking. I thought she had picked up a smell or something. I didn't worry too much about it, I mean this is a city – you can get lost for a short time, but you're bound to turn up somewhere, somehow... I knew she'd be back, follow her own scent to where she last saw me."

Rodney's eyes widened. "You thinking the same thing, aren't you Sheppard? The rift is here in Atlantis somewhere. If the dog got through, something else could have gotten through. A person perhaps? You would only feel that shift in time if whatever came through was big enough to register the shift in time."

"Gina..." John breathed her name and took off running, immediately tapping his radio to get his security teams onto one channel.

"Sheppard here. Urgent request to all security teams. I need an immediate search of the city – all levels, all areas. You are looking for a small white dog. Yes folks, that's right – a small white dog. And with that small white dog, will be a woman and she may be scared. You are not to alarm her in any way. Do not hold a weapon on her. She is not a threat. You need to find her, and contact me immediately, then stand down. Is that clear."

His voice was clipped and his face had changed. Colonel John Sheppard was back and in clear command. He knew without a doubt that she was here – that shift in time, that tilt that he had felt, could only mean one thing. They had used the rift to get her here and the fact that they had to get her here early meant that something had gone wrong. The crap was about to hit the fan.

And looking at the expressions on both Rodney and Elizabeth's face, it just had.


	36. Chapter 36 Untethered Anchor

CHAPTER 36 – UNTETHERED ANCHOR

Teyla and Ronon met him in the hallway outside the gate room. Ronon raised his eyebrows. "Gina?"

"Don't know for sure Ronon, but it's the safest bet I'm thinking. I felt something shift – something came through. You heard on the security channel what I want?" Ronon and Teyla both nodded in acknowledgement. "You two with me then. If it's her, we'll find her. It's a big city but my guess is she's got her dog with her. Elizabeth said that it disappeared suddenly as though she picked up something – a scent? We'll work back from where Elizabeth last saw the dog."

Rodney saw what Ronon had. Colonel John Sheppard was back.

They fanned out on the pier, looking back in the direction of the city. "Lower levels?" Teyla looked questioningly at John. "There's still a lot of unexplored areas down there, mostly laboratories and archives, but there's no power to those areas so if she did come in there, she will likely be scared and disorientated."

"I agree Teyla – we need to find her fast. We don't want her stumbling around in areas that we know nothing about – it's too dangerous. We know the ancients stored a lot of dodgy stuff down there – remember when we first arrived and the Athosian boy accidently opened a storage chamber containing a dangerous power based entity? The damn thing terrorised the whole base before we could trick it to go through the stargate."

They had entered the city now and John chose the lower levels to the left, fingers of unease worming their way into his mind.

"Where did you first see the dog, John? Would that give you any clue as to where she came through?"

He thought of Angel, saw her in his mind running down the hallway from outside the mess. That hallway led to the centre of the city but there was no telling just how long she had been running around in Atlantis looking for him.

_Looking for me_, thought John, _she knew immediately to find me. Knew that I was the one constant between time zones. Would that same not hold true for Gina? Wouldn't she automatically have some sort of sense to find me... but of course – a dog is a natural tracker, works on a smell. She would have naturally searched for a familiar scent and in a strange city where mostly everything is unfamiliar, then I wouldn't have been too difficult to find. Aaah Gina..._

He tried reaching out with his mind, imagining a giant ball of yarn with all the threads – picking out her one and gently pulling it towards him, reeling it in like a fishing line... but nothing. Nothing came to him. Nada.

He clicked his radio. "Sheppard here. Security teams – report in please." He continued moving through the lower hallways, acknowledging each team as they reported in, the one constant – no one had seen any sign of her or the dog. They had reached an area of the city where power was not activiated and was tempted to contact Rodney and request that power levels be temporarily restored to all levels of the city. And quickly dismissed that idea. It would be irresponsible to jeopardise the ZPM power and weaken the city against possible wraith attack in order to aid the search for one person. They would continue to search through the darkness.

John lost count of the number of empty dark and extremely dusty rooms they entered. Each room needed to be searched, even though they were relying on advance warning in the form of barking. John carried the hand held life signs detector, but either it was not working on these lower levels, or the signal was being blocked by something. None of their own life signs showed up on the screen, so it was doubtful that others would.

As time wore on, so John's concern grew. Night had long since come to Atlantis and he couldn't keep his security teams searching without food and rest for much longer. Reluctantly he clicked his radio. "Sheppard here. Security teams – you'll take rotation from here on in. Teams one and four, carry on as you were – check in every ten minutes as required. Teams two and three – stand down, get some food and rest. If we find nothing in the next two hours, you'll relieve the two teams still searching. Copy that?"

He flicked his glance to Ronon and Teyla knowing that as long as he continued, so would they.

It was an hour later that they finally heard the sound of far off barking, and as John broke out in a run, they heard also, an almightly crash and fear erupted hot and sharp into his stomach and he had to push down the overwhelming urge to vomit.

"Damn it Sheppard – we've never been this deep under the main part of the city. We have no idea what's down here." Ronon restlessly fingered his weapon.

"We're about to Ronon – stay sharp, but don't scare her. She may be disorientated. We will have been in the dark for several hours now and is likely terrified."

He began calling out to her as the barking grew louder and they grew nearer. "Gina! It's John... we'll have you out soon. Call out to us so that we know you're not hurt." No human reply, just the barking which had become frenzied at the sound of John's voice.

"Gina, damn it – if you can hear me I need you to acknowledge!"

Teyla placed a hand on his arm to calm him and to get him to soften his tone. He had let his fear anger his words and they had come our harshly. Not what he had intended at all and he softened his tone now, nearing a door behind which they could hear the frantic sound of animal claws scrabbling against a hard surface.

"Gina... sweetheart – we're right outside now. Coming in..." Without thought he drew his weapon and saw Teyla's frown and quickly reholstered it. Habit. Attack the unknown. Go in with weapons drawn. Assume all are the enemy Not the way this particular battle needed to be fought.

He reached for the door activation button but nothing happened. Tried again with the same result. Either the door lock had jammed – a malfunction, or something on the other side was blocking it. His money was on the latter, recalling the loud bang they had heard earlier. Something had happened inside the room and if Gina was not answering then likely she was not able to.

With this information came renewed fear and he pushed it down, fought to find the calm centre that was always present in the heat of battle. Found it briefly and grabbed for it, hanging on for dear life. It was the only thing that would get him through.

Ronon – being Ronon, resorted to brute force to get the door to open. He had little patience for modern technology, preferring to put his trust in the tried and true. His strength. John joined him, as did Teyla and they simply pushed the sliding mechanism until it began to give just a little and a small gap appeared. Big enough for a little white dog to squeeze through and leap ecstatically around John's ankles. Smiling in spite of himself, he squatted down, picked up the little dog and hugged her furry body while she wriggled in delight.

"Ok girl – you did your bit." He put her back down on the ground. "Now let us do ours. We'll get your mistress out, Angel."

The door widened a little further until finally Teyla, being the smallest, slipped through to remove the obstruction on the other side. Her voice came back slightly muffled.

"Containers John, heavy containers. They must have been stacked up against the wall beside the door, and that bang that we heard? They have all toppled and some are lying against the door. I will try to move them but I don't know if I can on my own."

He heard a small cry. "Teyla? What did you do?"

"I am all right John. I edges of the containers are sharp and I have cut myself, but it is not deep."

Her calm voice reassured him, as it often did. "Teyla, can you see her?"

"It's too dark in here John. It will take me time to work my way through the room. It is a large area and there are many benches and much equipment here."

Another cry from her. "Damn it Teyla – be careful! Ronon, we need to get that door wider, blockage or otherwise."

The only acknowledgement he got from the Satedan was a grunt as his shoulder slotted against the small opening they had managed to secure and pushed. John joined him and his sense of utter uselessness diminished slightly as the gap widened a little more and ignoring the pain in his shoulder as it was nearly dislocated in his attempt to push through, he felt the rush of success as he now stood on the other side of the door, adding his flashlight beam to Teyla's.

He motioned for Teyla to help him move some of the containers blocking the door and feeling a tearing pain in his shoulder, gritted his teeth. He'd deal with that later. The path of the door was suddenly cleared and it slid open fully now, admitting a relieved Ronon who instantly added his light to the others in the room.

It did indeed contain more equipment than most and while some of it was covered in expansive dust cloths, it appeared that recently some of the cloths had been removed and were now puddled carelessly on the ground.

"Anything Teyla? She must be in here. Angel... show us where she is, girl."

The little dog was poking around in a far corner and began whining. Before going over John activated his radio.

"Security teams, stand down. We've found her – I repeat, stand down."

Switching channels he connected to the infirmary. "Carson? Sheppard here. We need a gurney to the lower levels of the city – south east corner. Stand by for accurate directions. The hand held detectors don't appear to work down here, so we'll relay info as you need it."

He moved with urgency now, knowing that she was in the room and worried that she was injured. They found her crumpled in the corner, curled up slightly, her loyal dog sitting beside her whining as though trying to wake her. John bent briefly to pat the dog, taking the time to acknowledge that she was a good girl and had kept excellent guard over her charge. The dog began licking Gina's face and bending closer as Teyla shone her light to one side so as not to have it directy in Gina's eyes, he saw the darkening pool of blood at the side of her head leading down from a trail on her forehead where a nasty open wound became glaringly obvious in the light of Teyla's torch.

"She looks bad Sheppard..." Ronon did not mince words. "How far out is Carson?"

Teyla used her free hand to click her radio and turning her body slightly she spoke into her ear communcator. "Carson, it's Teyla. You are needed here urgently." She attempted to assist with their location, and giving Ronon a hard glance she turned to go out into the hallway to listen for the sounds that would indicate that Carson was nearing their location.

It seemed a long time before Carson arrived and John was aware of every single minute, ever second as it ticked away. He and Angel sat as though guarding her and occasionally the little dog would lick his hand and look up at him and whine.

"I know, girl – I'm worried too. Help will be here soon..."

He was too scared to move her, unsure of her injuries and contented himself with smoothing her hair back from her head wound and holding her limp and unresponsive hand. And if he had been a religious man, he would have prayed.

When Carson arrived, so did light and suddenly she was bathed in too much light, her injury now in stark relief and he heard Carson's sharp intake of breath that he did not succeed in hiding.

"Oh lass, that's a nasty wound. What on earth happened to you...?"

John dropped her hand and stepped away and Angel, after looking up at him, did the same, both of them now relinquishing her small body to the care of a professional. John aimed the light to the side so that Carson could use both hands to run over her body, carefully focusing on the wound at her head, then rolling her gently, checking for obvious broken bones.

"Help me Colonel. As little jarring as possible – onto the gurney."

John simply bent and lifted her gently into his arms, cradling her head carefully so as not to jar it, then placing her onto the gurney. He picked Angel up then and placed her on the end of the gurney as well, where she lay – her head across Gina's feet. At Carson's raised eyebrows John shrugged.

"She needs to continue her vigil until she's out of the dark..."

Carson did not reply.


	37. Chapter 37 Lost Connection

CHAPTER 37 – LOST CONNECTION

Carson didn't know which sight saddened him more. The little white dog who still sat at the end of her bed, her constant guard and companion through the past hour during which he had cleaned up the wound on her head and run a series of tests to determine whether there were any more serious injuries. Or the dark haired man who lounged despondently in the chair that had been pulled close to the hospital bed, so close in fact that his knees constantly bumped against the bed frame whenever he shifted position. Which, given the fact that the infirmary chairs were not overly comfortable – was a lot.

Carson finished typing up his notes into his computer. There wasn't a lot he could tell the Colonel. She was unconscious and likely this was due to the head injury. A CT scan had shown no internal bleeding into her brain, and it was just a matter of waiting for her to wake up. There were no other injuries that he could detect, and the slight fluttering of her long dark lashes as they lay on her cheeks was an indication that there was an ample amount of brain activity going on inside her head right now.

"I'll get you something to eat and drink Colonel. You're exhausted – I'd tell you to take yourself off to your quarters for a shower and bed, but I'm thinking that likely you'll ignore me on that one." He placed a comforting hand on the seated man's shoulders and looking down at him with concern, missed the closing of his eyes as he mentally tried to tell himself to stay strong.

"Thanks doc – and for the record? I'm staying right here until she wakes up. I have no idea what happened to bring her through in that condition, but until she wakes up, I'm here to make your infirmary look messy. Sorry..."

"That's all right son, I understand. But if your own health deteriorates, I'll be changing my Mr Nice Guy approach. Oh, and Colonel? When I get back from the mess, I'll be looking at the shoulder of yours. Don't think I didn't notice the way you were holding it."

John managed a flicker of a smile for the doctor as he left the room. No, that man missed nothing.

He rose from the chair now, and with the doctor out of the room was able to let out the groan of pain he had kept firmly pushed down. _ Damn, that shoulder did hurt and time to man up and get something done about it. Nothing you can do for her now, except wait. Wait for what? Who will she be when she wakes up? _ And pushed away the sickening feeling that had been making itself known in his stomach since he had found her unconscious. _Ripples.._.

He was standing and holding her hand broodingly when Carson walked back in followed by Ronon. Carson held a tray which had on it, a plate of something steaming and hot, and coffee – a blessedly large coffee which looked like nectar of the gods about now. Smiling gratefully at him, he set the tray down on the table beside her bed, and lowered himself back down to the chair, this time letting the groan escape unbidden – but did attempt to turn it into a moan of delight when he took the first large sip of steaming coffee. Carson shot a sharp glance his way.

"I haven't forgotten Colonel. Us Scotsmen have the memory of elephants. Drink your coffee, eat some of that … whatever... it is, and then I'll look at that shoulder."

He managed the coffee and several bites of the … whatever, put his fork down and tossed a distasteful look in Carson's direction, hearing Ronon's chuckle. No doubt the big Satedan had already ploughed through more than one plate of the food, he didn't care what he ate, as long as it was plentiful and filled the hole. Mess food certainly left something to be desired – one of the true regrets at not being on earth. Fresh pizza, fast food hamburgers and hot fries... cooked just right. Oh, and a good steak.

"Right Colonel – jump up on this bed over here. Let's look at the shoulder. I might run you through the xray machine just to make sure none of the ligaments are torn, and likely we're going to need to strap it for a couple of days. Just to let it heal."

John cast another look at Gina's bed and Ronon intercepted it. "Go, Sheppard. I'll keep watch over her. Me and the little fur ball here..." Gingerly he reached out to touch the dog, who promptly growled at him eliciting a smile out of John.

"Good judge of character there Angel. This is one bad boy... you'd do well to stay away from him."

Smiling he patted the dog himself as he walked past and was rewarded with adoring brown eyes turned instantly in his direction.

Chuckling a little to himself now he said "make that general's, old ladies, women AND dogs..." and saw Carson roll his eyes. Ronon frowned not getting it at all.

Carson had just finished strapping up John's shoulder when they heard a small moan from the bed where Gina lay. John was off his bed in seconds and picking up her hand he waited for the flickering of her eyes to show that she was about to wake up. She did not disappoint and suddenly he was staring into a pair of bright blue, terrified eyes.

"Gina, honey – it's me, John. You're safe now. You made it through – you're in Atlantis." He smiled down at her, glad he'd taken the time to shave yesterday as he saw her eyes roam over his face. And saw something that terrified him. No recognition.

She pulled her hand abruptly out of his and groaned as the action made her head ache. Carson gently manoevered John out of the way, having seen the look in Gina's eyes. He was aware instantly of the situation, and knew that with a head injury of any kind, there was disorientation and even partial and temporary memory loss. He was prepared for this and had warned the Colonel that it could be a possibilty however he saw that the reality was a harsh blow to the man.

"Gina? I'm Doctor Beckett. You're in a hospital. You've got a nasty head injury and you've been unconscious for several hours, possibly as much as a day. We don't know yet, when the injury occurred or how." He chose not to give her too much information about where she was. If she had temporary memory loss, then information overload could shut her down completely. "I need you to tell me the last thing you remember – but first, tell me where it hurts."

Her blue eyes flickered around the room, but any action that involved movement of her head brought pain to her eyes and she shut them briefly, one to block out the harsh overhead light and two, to try and clear the fuzzy fog that had dropped down over her mind. She didn't know the men who hovered over her. She understood that she was in a hospital and that she had likely been in an accident and a tear squeezed out of the corner of her eye as she fought to find purchase on her memories. A hand wiped the lone tear away and her eyes opened again, and she was looking up into the face of the man with the kind hazel eyes, eyes that looked at her as though they knew her, eyes that held far more than they should have. She leaned into the hand that rested against her cheek. It felt right. But he was a stranger. This handsome man with the dark spikey hair who looked as though the weight of the world rested on his broad shoulders.

She felt something wet touch her hand and a little furry white body crept up quietly from her place at the end of the bed, and sat just by her shoulder – chocolate brown eyes filled with doggy love and a sob broke out of her then. "Angel..." her voice was cracked and her throat hurt as though she hadn't spoken for a long time and her hand moved up to wrap around the little dog who snuggled in beside her, quietly giving strength to her mistress. Gina's eyes drifted shut again. _It hurts to think right now, back to sleep for a little while... angel... where am I and who are these people? Where's Dad, Frank? I'm scared... and I'm lost..._ Angel whined, sensing her fears and turned her little face to look up at John, then back down at her mistress.

"I can't help her right now Angel – she has to rest... let her rest..." And patting the little dog, he bent and dropped a soft kiss onto the forehead of the woman who had crossed half a century to be with him, but now had no idea who he was. _Ripples..._


	38. Chapter 38 Smoothing the Way

CHAPTER 38 – SMOOTHING THE WAY

He fell into his bed and sleep came hard and full of dreams and demons. Always demons. Sometimes he saw her, saw Gina and she was a long way away – in the distance and he had no way of getting to her. She had lifted her hand to him, palm out as though in a gesture of need, but as he looked at the words that she mouthed, he could not understand her. No sound. And with the silence came understanding. He was the only one that could help her return, help her memories come back to the correct point. Another ripple – the rift had squeezed and choked her current memories from her and taken her back to the point of her last coherent thought. And he needed to find out what that was. He had no idea what had led her to the rift, what had occurred during the journey through the rift to cause the damage that it had done.

Restlessly he tossed the blankets aside, his legs moving subconsciously, fighting with something that took no form. Her forcefully pushed these demons aside, to focus on her. But he saw that she was fading, and knew that the memories of him, of their time together would be gone forever unless he brought them back. Now.

Urgent in his actions now, he sat up in bed, pushing aside disheveled hair that refused to co operate. Throwing on the same clothes that had arrived at an untidy heap on his floor just a short time ago. Boots. Then he went to his dresser where he picked up a book. War and Peace. Brought from earth when he first arrived in Atlantis with the intention of reading it. And while that hadn't exactly happened, it had served as the perfect hiding place for a photo that he kept there. A photo that he had found in his pocket when he came through the time portal from 1962. A photo that he himself had not put there, a photo that he did not ever remember being taken.

Him and Gina sitting on the beach side by side, thighs touching intimately, her head resting on his shoulder, dark hair blowing softly out behind her. And the look in his eyes as he looked down at her, head slightly bent, and her gaze turned slightly so that she looked up at him. No doubt to anyone looking at that photo. This was a couple in love. A love that was meant to be. He wondered if Callandra had somehow managed to put the picture in his pocket. They had not had a camera during the time he had spent with her, and this appeared to be from a Polaroid camera which was not in use until after 1965. Another conundrum. But he did not argue or question. This photo gave him something that he could show her, something tangible. Evidence that they knew each other.

Scrubbing his hand restlessly through his hair again he placed the photo in the pocket of his BDU shirt and left his quarters to head back to the infirmary, knowing that time was suddenly shrinking in ever increasing circles and that he only had one shot at this before the window of opportunity was shut forever.

"Colonel, a word please..." Carson had seen him enter the infirmary and wanted to speak to him before he went to see Gina. John paused at the doorway, waiting for Carson to join him.

"How is she doc? Any sign of her memory returning. Anything at all?" John peered around Carson's shoulder, trying to see the still form of the woman who lay in the bed.

"Her last memory is of walking her dog on the beach one morning. Then there is only a blank page. It sounds as though that was the morning she found you on the beach. She's blanked out everything from that point forward – I haven't told her anything about Atlantis, what year we are in – anything. Too much too soon and I think she will shut down. She thinks something happened to her on the beach, she fainted and her father found her and brought her here to hospital. She senses something though, she's not asking enough questions.. I suspect something flutters at the edge of her memory, so it's not totally gone."

John was pensive. "Protection?"

"Likely son. She took a battering when she came through that rift and her mind simply returned itself to the last point where things were comfortable. Before you."

"Thanks Carson – you know how to make a man feel mighty fine. I need to start bringing her back. I can't leave it too long, the window of memory is small and if she stays in the past too long, she'll not have the strength to come forth into the future. Not fully anyway."

Carson huffed out an impatient breath. "I think you're playing with fire Colonel. You don't have the skill to play around with her mind and memories. Leave it to the experts. We can have Kate Heitmeyer come down and talk to her, try and bring the memories out the right way."

"Only if my way doesn't work Doc – She needs to be around me, please let me do it my way first."

Carson was not convinced but something in him responded to the pain he saw in the Colonel's eyes. "On one condition Colonel. Any sign of undue stress and I'll have to insist that you stand down. I'm in charge of her medical decisions and you'll need to respect that."

John pushed gently past Carson now, needing to be near her and see her. He nodded at him as he passed and stopped at the end of the bed to give her little furry companion a belly rub. "Hey Angel... how's our girl going...hmmm? Good to see you're looking after her."

He seated himself beside the bed and watched as her eyes slowly opened, responding to his presence.

"Hey Gina. I know you don't remember me, but I need to work through some things with you, and try and get your memory back. A lot has happened since your last memory, and some of what you are going to learn is going to seem a little scary. But I'm right here, and believe it or not, you kinda trusted me not so long ago..." He smiled at her and something in his eyes caused hers to widen and her breath to hitch slightly, and she felt the tiny tug in her memory, that little pull as if a long thread dangled and someone from a long distance away had given it a small tug as though to remind her that they were there.

John pulled the picture out of his pocket, ran a thumb across it lovingly, then placed in her hand, allowing her to bring it up in front her face to look at it. Her eyes lingered for a long time over the couple in the picture and he watched her eyes soften slightly. Not recognition, but a shifting and then saw her thumb rub over the picture just as his had done.

"You and I? Together? How can I forget a person?" There was pain in her voice but he also recognised that hint of steel that had drawn him to her from the beginning. She wanted to know – it was not a simple case of an overworked mind taking the cowards way out to forcibly bury memories it was too scared to face. Something had happened in that rift, or in the time before she had left to make the memories fade. He just needed to find out what that was.

"Something happened to you Gina, something you will have difficulty understanding. Carson?" The doctor hurried over, his gaze already flickering over his patient to see how she was responding to John. Seeing nothing to alarm him he smiled.

"Yes Colonel – I suspect you are going to ask me if you can do something I'll likely not approve of."

Gina watched the easy comraderie between the two men and shut her eyes briefly, keeping their voices flowing over her, while placing John's face into the screen behind her eyes. There was something trying to surface. She could feel it but it was out of reach and this alone made her want to stamp her feet in frustration. Her head hurt, both from the head wound and from the sheer frustration of knowing that important information had somehow been lost.

When she opened her eyes again, it was to find two worried sets on her. John had leaned in close. "Gina, honey? You ok? I want to take you for a little wheel chair ride, just to get you out of the infirmary for a little while. Carson here has said it's ok for a short time – I thought it you could see... certain things, then what I tell you will not seem so unlikely."

"I mean it Colonel – very short time out of bed. She should be resting, and if it wasn't for the supposed urgency, then I wouldn't be allowing this at all."

"Carson, you have my word – ok? Angel girl... time for a walk..." Carson brought around a wheel chair and while the excited dog leapt down from the bed, it was a more careful process getting Gina out of the bed and into the wheelchair. As soon as she sat up she was dizzy and John waited patiently, holding her carefully around the shoulders until she had her equilibrium and he could transfer her from the edge of the bed to the wheelchair. He saw her take several deep breaths and squatted down so that his face was brought level with hers. Gently his hand came up to stroke down her cheek.

"Do you trust me Gina? Reach down inside yourself and you'll see the answer... do you trust me?"

She didn't need to reach down, knew that trust between the two of them was irrevokable, nodded then thought better of it when a shaft of pain shot through her head. His hand was gentle on her cheek as he saw her wince of pain and she closed her eyes at his touch. It felt right.

She knew immediately when they left the infirmary that her world had shifted and life as she knew it was suddenly and inexplicably different. "John...?" Her voice was small and he resisted the urge to stop the wheelchair and simply gather her into his arms.

"It's ok Gina, don't be afraid. It'll all fall into place soon, I promise."

The décor of Atlantis alerted her immediately that she was no longer home – far far from home likely. The hallways that he rolled her wheelchair through, and the transporter with it's touch screen control panel brought a stunned gasp and he didn't need to look down into her eyes to know the level of the shock that would be registering there.

"Tell me John.. I'm not a baby, you don't need to hide anything. I have no idea what's going on but I know that the crapstorm of all time has just hit the deck and I've managed to get caught up in it..."

Her voice trailed off as he left the city and headed out onto the east pier and she could see the city of Atlantis rise tall and proud out of the ocean. He crouched down beside her now to see the wonder that spread across her face and taking her hand he held it tightly in his own. As though to keep her from slipping away again.

"Are you ready to hear Gina? You already know all this... you found out about it two weeks ago when you found me lying on your beach, a traveller from the year 2012... from another galaxy..." and as he began his story again, he saw the steel that stiffened her spine and knew that somehow she would be ok. Callandra had been right. She may not have the ancient gene, but she was a main player in the big game and had been chosen for her role for a reason.


	39. Chapter 39 To Believe or Not to Believe?

CHAPTER 39 – TO BELIEVE OR NOT TO BELIEVE

He didn't want to tire her out and watched carefully as her face paled as his story wore on. He sat back on the ground beside her wheelchair, hand now resting on her knee, needing to touch her. She seemed to need this too for she placed her own hand hesitantly on top of his and he was able to turn her hand over, trapping her hand beneath his own. Protective. He tipped his head against the side of the wheelchair, suddenly weary himself. It was an exhausting story. She had asked some questions, her voice carefully blank as though she sought to process the details first before coming to any conclusions and remembered that she was a scientist and this was her way.

_Clear and clinical? Not his Gina... she was hot blooded, all fire and smoke that smouldered and fizzled and needed only his glance to bring her to a roaring flame. He felt the muscles of her leg beneath his hand and it was a familiar feel and thought that if he lifted his hand just a little higher, he would feel her heat, that familiar heat and he needed her so damn bad._

As though she followed his thoughts he felt her still suddenly, then shyly her fingers moved through his hair that rested beside her chair. And her touch felt nice, familiar and damn it, he needed her so desperately that he had to bite his teeth together to stop himself from screaming.

"John?" He moved his head slightly, not wanting her to remove the hand that massaged lightly there, but needing to see her face.

"Thank you." Those beautiful blue eyes looked down at him and there was a smile in them that chased away the clouds that had been flitting across their blue depths.

"For putting you through hell these past two weeks?" John's hand had begun to gently caress her thigh, not sexual, but possessive.

"For your patience. I know it must be difficult, frustrating – to sit there and have to explain something over and over. I wish I could remember, if nothing more than to bring a smile to your face. I know we are close..." at this she blushed slightly, her gaze dropping to his hand that rested there, enjoying the sensation and understanding that the sensation was a familiar one – she could no longer doubt that. She wanted his touch now as much as he needed to give it. "Your touch is familiar, as is your face, but there's a big blank hole and until I fill that in, then the us you talk about doesn't seem real to me. Give me time..."

"I will sweetheart. It's my fault you're here, in this position, with this memory loss. I did that to you. I have to fix it and make things back the way they were. I don't know yet how to do it, but I have faith that it'll come to me. So far, I seem to have been shown the way whenever I wander off the right path. I trust that it will happen again. You need to do the same thing."

He saw the tiredness in her eyes, eyes that now at least held some clarity. He tried to reach out and find how much she had actually taken in. Knew that she didn't understand most of what he had told her and knew also, that she had filed it away in that filing cabinet brain of hers to process at leisure. She would be ok, it would take time. _Time... ahhh... I don't think I will say that word again without it's real implications jumping out to stare me arrogantly in the face. Time, something we take for granted as being a constant in our lives. Mess with it, and that constant becomes blurred, becomes indistinct. Mess with it, and you affect the lives and situations of every single living thing around you. Playing God? Most definitely. Add THAT to the list of errors that the Ancients made._

He took her back to the infirmary, laughing a little when he saw Angel running up to them excitedly after barking at something down in the waters below. "Yeah, girl – lots's of weird and wonderful creatures down here. It seems that animals are the most accepting creatures that ever evolved. Humans, not so much..."

Carson met them with a worried look on his face as they arrived back at the infirmary. He saw the tiredness in her face, and censure changed the expression on his own.

"I told you not to overdo it Colonel - look at her. Help her back into bed right now. She's exhausted and likely you've made things worse. Trying to explain the sort of fairy tale she's just found herself involved in while still trying to recover from an injury like that? Irresponsible on your part, and irresponsible on mine for letting you do it Colonel. I'm sorry lass, I should have known better – let's get you back into bed..."

He looked down into her pale face partially covered by the large bandage at the side of her head, and was stopped by John's firm hand.

"Look at her Carson – really look at her...!"

Her peered into her blue eyes and saw that some of the confusion and some of the blankness had dissipated and where before there had been the lost look that victims of accidents and head injuries usually wear like a badge of honour, now there was some clarity, and a certain expression when she slid her eyes cautiously towards John.

_She may not remember the past two weeks, _thought Carson, _but his touch is familiar. That's why he's keeping a firm hold on her right now. Colonel Sheppard, you walk a fine line sometimes my boy, but you're a good man. She knows, deep down somewhere inside, beyond those demons, she knows who you are. On some visceral level son, you are bonded to her._


	40. Chapter 40 Time and Understanding

CHAPTER 40 – TIME AND UNDERSTANDING

There were times during those two days that she chose to disbelieve. It seemed easier to do so because attempting to piece together the information that Colonel Sheppard had thrown at her that day on the pier, and the continuing bombardment of information he sent her way, often brought pain more than not. So, if she shut her mind down and let it drift, thought about 1962 and her memories of her home, her beach, her family that she had left there – the pain went away and she was able to smile and remember. Only the good things.

Carson was worried. The head injury was healing as were most of the symptons. She seemed tired still and needed to sleep for short periods throughout the day, and this also was a normal occurrence with such an injury. It was the disassociation that worried him. John was a constant visitor and he saw the way that the Colonel's kept physical contact with her at all times when he was with her. Simple touches mostly, holding her hand, running a hand gently down her hair – but sometimes he saw the heat that flared in his eyes and the answering flash in hers. He understood that this was John's way of strengthening the connection so that she remembered, but questioned whether forcing the physical feelings to supercede the emotional ones was a wise choice in her recovery.

Curiously enough it was Rodney who spent a lot of time at her side. Talking, laughing and Carson wondered at the connection there. She was comfortable in the presence of the scientist and saw the thoughtful look on her face after Rodney had left her each time. Each time he came he brought her a small gift, usually some unimportant piece of technology that the ancients had left behind. On some level Rodney seemed to understand that these fascinated Gina and appealed to the scientific nature of her mind, and it was during one of these visits where their debate was becoming just a little heated as they argued over a small hand held heat infuser that the Lantien team had rendered more of less useless as soon as they discovered it, that John walked in.

He stood at the doorway and watched them. There was a look in Rodney's eyes that he had trouble putting his finger on. Something rippled through him. Not jealously. He didn't think that Rodney's reasons for these constant visits for anything like _that._ Rodney had a connection with her, somehow and hoped that he wasn't about to discover that there was some loose thread still hanging around out there. Because that would really _suck!_

"Hey Sheppard! Give us your take on this one. Useless or not? Hand held heat infuser... you guys decided it was more or less rubbish. But you didn't get stranded on _P8T198_ while trying to figure out a way to get the sorry ass of a Colonel home again. It was damn cold there. Ronon who thankfully kept the home fires burning so to speak was a godsend... but this little baby? This would have helped things along nicely. Permanent power source, activated by the wearer as to the degree of cold they were experiencing... perfect!"

John felt a sense of disassociation. He looked at the happy smile on Rodney's face, then looked down at the device he held in his hand.

"Rodney! I've never seen that device before. Where did you find it?"

The smile remained on Rodney's face as he juggled the device from hand to hand. "We found it when we first arrived in Atlantis. Among other such useless finds I might add. Stored them all in an archive room, testing them as we go and once we decide that there's not a lot of use for these things, then they get tagged and bagged. You know this Sheppard... hell, you're usually the first one to play with the gadgets, just like some oversized school boy."

John fought to bring up the memory. Rodney's words didn't ring true. Carson had come up behind Rodney and was peering over his shoulder at the hand held device. "Aah, Rodney. I remember that one. Colonel? You and Rodney were chasing each other – you tried to shove it down the back of his shirt and Elizabeth caught you. Tried to make out she was angry, but she couldn't quite hide the smile on her face. You were yelling something to Rodney about shoving it where the sun don't shine... or something to that effect..."

John saw the smile on Carson's face and knew cold fear for a split second. He did not remember. That memory was not there. And John had the memory of an elephant, no doubt about that.

Carson saw the change in the Colonel's expression and was beside him in seconds. "You all right lad? You look like you've seen a ghost!" Rodney had risen from beside Gina's bed and John as if from a distance, saw the concern enter her blue eyes.

"Carson, I don't remember that device. And you know me. I don't forget very much. If anything. How can I have forgotten? And if I've forgotten that, what else have I forgotten, or conveniently dissociated myself with?"

"Calm down Colonel. I'm sure it's nothing. A small lapse in memory – hell after everything you've been through why would you even need to remember a small innocuous gadget that you had already dismissed as useless in your mind anyway."

"You don't understand Carson. It's not just a lapse. When you talk about it – it's as thought I'm hearing of it for the first time. I can see a hole where that memory should be... and if that hole is there, what if there are other holes? Can I trust what I remember?"

John needed to get out of the room, away from the confusion he saw on Rodney and Carson's face, away from the understanding he saw on Gina's face. Away. Somewhere quiet where he could ponder that small black hole and wonder at it's significance. For he knew it would have significance. Every tiny change that he had affected through his trip back to the past had rendered something essentially different. The important word being _essential._

Without saying anything further he turned and ran out of the room, putting distance and time between the people who looked at him in confusion and the confusion that was spiralling in his mind. _Time and distance. Distance and time. Therein lies your conundrum John. _


	41. Chapter 41 Time and Distance

CHAPTER 41 – TIME AND DISTANCE

_Time and distance..._

These two words kept churning around and around in his head. He needed to escape, needed some sort of release and choosing quickly, he stopped briefly at his private quarters, threw on his running clothes and made his way to his own personal running circuit that he had carved out for himself soon after their arrival in Atlantis. He came here when he needed down time, thinking time, nothing time. He ran. And then ran some more. The circuitous route a balm for whatever was ailing him at the time. His feet picked up the rythym automatically without thought and he simply let one foot follow the other.

_Time and distance..._

Over and over, his feet pounded the surface of his running circuit, unworried about meeting anyone else here – this area was his alone. He kept pushing the words around in his mind, sure that their meaning would come to him. Knew also that the small black hole that he had already encountered in this memory was a result of this.

_Time and distance..._

He ran until his feet ached and he was more sweat than skin. Lost count of the miles, just collapsed at some point, unable to go on any more. Rolled over onto his stomach and just let the sweat dry on his skin, let his racing heart settle and let the words drift over him. Searching for the hidden meaning.

Resolve then. Leaping to his feet he moved quickly to the gear room and shed quickly his running clothes, leaving them in a scattered heap on the floor. Opening his locker he pulled out fresh BDU's - in deference to his intended offworld trip he put on a tactical vest and added a weapon, then without giving his excursion any further thought, he raced to the control room.

Elizabeth was there. She had given him space up until now and had not sent anyone to find him. Carson and Rodney had both filled her in on his sudden departure from the infirmary and she knew that he had chosen to exhaust his demons in his own way. Until now.

"What do you think you're doing John? You're not going offworld on your own. I need to know what you're doing and where you're going. Then I'll decide whether or not to let you go. I am still base commander, best you remember that." She had deliberately injected censure into her voice, needing to jolt him into complying. She could bring up a team of marines, use his own men against him, but chose to handle this herself. She knew John. She knew the way his mind worked and from what Carson and Rodney had told her, something was going on in his mind that scared the crap out of him. When running himself into a puddle on the ground had not given him any answers, she knew that he chose now to confront them in some other location. One she would approve of first, or shut him down. She had no compunctions against doing just that, either.

"I have to go to _P8T198._ I'm not sure why Elizabeth, but there is one more thing I need to do. One more thing I need to find, to understand."

_Time and distance. Rodney._

The man in question came into the control room now, as did Ronon. They were both geared up also and flanked John now. Ronon's glance at his friend was almost fierce. "You're not going alone John. Whatever it is you're driven to do, we're going with you. We'll end this once and for all, so everyone here can get on with their lives."

"The lives they're supposed to live.." muttered Rodney and John glanced at him sharply.

"Say that again Rodney..."

"Nothing Sheppard."

"Not nothing, it means something. Crap Rodney, it's sitting at the damn edge of my mind. That comment? It means something to me and it means something to you. That's why you said it. That's why you want to come with me. Damn it. Think Rodney! What the hell does it mean?"

Anger rolled out of John in waves now. He was sick of indecisions and inactivity. He needed to move again, as though his body had not already undergone a massive use of energy levels already. It was primed, ready to go, ready to take on whatever the hell it needed to take on. Ronon saw the fidgety tension that sent John's body into physical overload, that made him edgy and raw, hell - the same thing was going on most of the time in himself. But John had always been able to control this side of himself. This time was different. He was losing control, losing the ability to distinguish between what he needed to do and what he had already done.

Ronon's eyes flicked from Rodney to Elizabeth. Then blinked. Looked back at John to see if he had noticed but John's focus was now down in the gate room. Ronon shot his glance back at Rodney. Hazy outline, indistinct features... and shook his head. Too much Ruus wine last night? Aaah hell - Sheppard's insecurities and indecisions were beginning to rub off on him.

"Sheppard, if we're gonna do this, let's get the hell out of here. I want normal back. I want the old Sheppard back. This time stuff has got to stop - now!" He grabbed John by the arm and physically marched him down to the gate room, glaring at Elizabeth as he walked past, daring her to intervene or stop him in any way. She simply shook her head. Ronon when in a mood like this, was a rollercoaster out of control. John not much better. Hopefully Rodney would be the glue that held them at least partially together on this little quest that had somehow once again, managed to spiral out of control.

"You go, but I won't pretend to understand what the hell is going on. John? We're going to have a serious talk when you get back. Ronon? I'm the damned commander of this base, and you'll treat me with the respect I deserve. Rodney! Look after these two - whatever it is they are hell bent on doing. It seems you're the only sane one in this little group of meddling misfits."

The insult rolled off their backs, mostly. Rodney did manage to shoot her a slightly aggrieved look, but if this was a runaway rollercoaster, he too, was simply along for the ride and even with an advanced physics degree, it was unlikely that he would be of any use to attempting to stop the rollercoaster. It would simply have to burn itself out. Or crash.

They reached the gate room and sent up a nod for the gate technician to begin dialling. He looked first to Elizabeth for confirmation, after her little outburst, the technician thought that allowing the members in the room below to dictate when to dial, would perhaps usurp her authority. Elizabeth smiled at him and added her nod and he began the dialling sequence for _P8T198._

"I'm going with you." She sounded confident and sure of herself and John's head whipped around quickly at the sound of her voice. She looked small and hopelessly frail with her pale face and bandage at the side of her head, but her eyes were clear and strong and under his scrutiny she pulled herself carefully up to her full height and held his eyes with her own and he saw the strength and resolve that hardened to steel there.

"You're in no condition to come on this trip Gina - you need to be in bed." His eyes raked over her now, taking in the too large pair of dark blue BDU's that someone had found for her to wear and the shirt that came down midthigh. Gina shot her gaze up to the control room where Elizabeth stood looking down at them. She saw something in the younger woman's eyes, saw the resolve and shook her head slightly at John. She would not intervene. This was between the two of them, and if Gina could manage to convince John to let her go, then it was simply meant to be. Definitely no intervention on her part.

Rodney was the only one not surprised to see Gina there. "If you're coming with us Gina, you need to gear up properly - offworld protocol. No one steps through the gate without full gear. I'll take you to the gear room and we'll see if we can find something to fit you... hmmm, that could be a problem." He had reached Gina's side, totally ignoring John's reaction to Gina appearing in the gate room and she felt the anger thrum in the air as he passed John.

"Rodney, she is not going. That is final. She's not up to this trip medically or physically. Don't push me on this." Ronon felt the undercurrents between the two men and knew that they had something more to do with this trip offworld than Gina. Both had an agenda, and neither could tell the other exactly what that agenda was. And his role? Keep these two idiots from killing themselves. And to help keep Gina safe. John was wrong. Injury or not, she needed to be there. The game was still playing, but John no longer controlled the game board. John stood watching Rodney and Gina leave the room, and flicking an impatient glance at Ronon,he strode off after them. Ronon simply went and leant negligently against the wall. And waited for the players to return.

"What the hell is wrong with you Rodney. Why the hell are you really coming along on this trip?"

_If anger had a visible colour, then it would be dark gray like smoke_. This thought flitted through Gina's head as she watched the man she did not know except by touch, face off the scientist who had become her friend these past few days. Her friend? Her ally, she had felt an instant bonding with him when he had first sat beside her bed and started up a conversation for seemingly no reason at all. It was not in Rodney's nature to instantly befriend someone like that - yet he had kept coming back. Bringing her small gifts and showing her funny pieces of technology. The technology that had started off this crazy quest of Colonel Sheppard and his sudden need to get back to the planet where the time portal was situated. And telling her about his work, a special project that he was working on, one that no-one in Atlantis would understand. One he wanted desperately to share with someone. One who could help him find what he was looking for...

Gina worked from knowledge recently learned, she still had no memory of that lost time in 1962, but knew from what she had been told that the portal was closed and could no longer be opened again - at least not in the time when she had come from. As she watched the two men argue, she felt disassociated from their argument, even though she was at the centre of it. She listened to John telling Rodney to mind his own business, all the while his hands were busy, he was finding a tactical vest for her, carefully helping her into in, then bending his head to fasten it. She looked down at his dark head, felt a stirring in her memory, another time, that same dark head bent in passion against her skin and she trembled, causing him to stop his arguing and look up at her. He saw in her eyes then, that memory of ... something and sudden and uncontrollable need for this woman punched into his gut. His hands left the fastenings of the vest and moved up to gently frame her face and he saw something there that lightened his mood, just a tiny bit. Bending his head, he brushed her lips with his and felt rather than heard her small sigh.

Rodney had fallen silent, no longer adding his voice to the argument, simply cleared his throat and left the room. John seemed disinclined to continue their argument, his actions softening, firstly helping her to gear up and now unable to resist just standing in front of her and kissing her... there had never really been any argument. He could no more have stopped her coming with them than stopping Ronon.

"Gina... your memories are coming back?" He murmured this against her cheek, feeling the softness of her skin and wanting to stand here, just for a short while longer and savour it.

"Not my memories John, there is still that hole, that black area where I can't piece anything together, but I remember your touch in that it feels familiar, natural."

"Do you remember this?" he slid his hands down her face then moved them to cup her bottom and pull her closer, straight against his own heat and he heard her moan softly.

"I remember how it felt to be held against you, I just don't remember ...you... and that does not make any sense, I know."

He had dropped his head again to nuzzle against her neck, smiling when she moved her head sideways to allow him better access. "Then for now, you can just remember my touch... and if I touch you often, perhaps you will remember more" and he claimed her mouth in another hot kiss that had her lifting slightly off her toes to fit herself better against him." Reluctantly he pulled away from her.

"We need to go - for the record, I still don't want you there, although I want you within touching distance for now, so a rock and a hard place situation... I'm worried that being that close to the portal, something will happen, but something is meant to happen - that's why I have this damn burning need to go back there. Rodney seems hell bent on being there also, so the game plan? I have no idea - Ronon simply there to pull the reins, but you and I Gina, this is the only thing I am sure about."

He gave her tactical vest one more tug to tighten it, then gave up. They were not designed to fit small frames such as hers and taking her hand he pulled her out of the room and back to the gate room, watching as Ronon finally pushed himself off the wall where he had been leaning.

"Time to get this show on the road Sheppard. Enough delays. Rodney's gonna drive me nuts and I just want things back to normal. Whatever normal is around here." He looked up sharply at the gate room and Elizabeth gave the nod to the gate technician letting him finally begin the dialling sequence and as John looked up there also, still holding tightly to Gina's hand, he caught the shift in time again and shuddered, and knew when they stepped back through that gate, one key element will have changed. _Time and distance... Rodney._


	42. Chapter 42 Balanced

CHAPTER 42 – BALANCED

It was as cold as he remembered, hell make that colder. He pulled Gina against him, trying to shield her from the cold, cursing again the fact that she had come along on this offworld excursion. She shouldn't be here, she should have been tucked up in a bed in the infirmary. O_r tucked up in your bed, _John told himself_. Later, that'll be for later. She wants my touch, hell more than happy to oblige. Oh yeah, _ and as if sensing his thoughts she tucked herself in closer, shivering more than just a little in the cold.

"You made enough noise last time you had to come back here McKay. You shoulda sat this one out." Ronon grumbled at the scientist, seeing the first signs of a good moan session about to start, preempting it before he even opened his mouth.

"How can you not feel this cold Ronon. No wonder we found no life signs on this planet - and no wonder the ancients chose to build their little time portal here. Certainly had little chance of accidental discovery..." This last comment was directed at John with a roll of his eyes and John managed a small grin. He was known for touching things he shouldn't, kind of a bad habit really. Mostly with consequences as he had found out this time around.

_If I hadn't played around with it, wouldn't have this woman at my side. Wouldn't be a stargate programme. Woulda shoulda coulda...yada yada yada. _John thought that they could play that game around in circles for the next fifty years. The result would still be the same.

They made their way over the uneven ground, Rodney's cheeks turning a ruddy shade of red in the intense cold of the air and he repeatedly blew on his hands, covered only in the half gloves they favoured as part of their cold weather gear. He rummaged around in his pockets, bringing out the hand held heat infuser that he and Gina had been talking about in the infirmary and John felt that cold blank spot in his mind shift a little and gripped Gina a little too tightly causing her to cry out slightly.

"John? You're hurting me, what's wrong."

"That damn device. Something about the hole it left..." then his eyes were drawn to Rodney's pocket where a piece of paper of some sort was sticking out, obviously dislodged when he had pulled out the heat infuser. "Rodney, what's that paper in your pocket." Glancing down at it quizzically, John being closer, reached over and pulled it out, holding it between them so they could both look at it.

Rodney's eyes shot to his in shock. "Sheppard? What the hell's going on?" Ronon moved closer, drawn by the shock in Rodney's voice. He peered down at the paper. It was a photo, taken as a polaroid, similar to the one that John had found in his pockets when he returned. The photo was of Rodney, standing in front of a space rocket, and for all intent and purposes, it looked like one of the Saturn V rockets.

"What's going on Sheppard? That's a Saturn V. I wasn't even living in the United States when the Apollo missions were happening. 1960's.. Jesus.." He stared down at the photo, fascinated in spite of himself. It was not a tourist shot, Rodney was standing on a platform that led to the middle portion of the rocket. A very jubilant smile on his face. A surrounding him, equally jubilant smiles on their faces –Frank Borman, James A. Lovell Jr and William A. Anders.

Ronon was looking from John to Rodney, no idea what the implications of the photo meants. "Who are those men Rodney and what sort of ship is that."

"Please be informed there is a Santa Claus..." Rodney muttered these words, famous words that signalled the end of a famous mission and John muttered an oath, one that did not pass his lips often. He, just as Rodney did, realised immediately the implicatons of this photo.

Apollo 8 was the first mission to take humans to the Moon and back. An important prelude to actually landing on the Moon was testing the flight trajectory and operations for getting there and back. Apollo 8 did this and acheived many other firsts including the first manned mission launched on the Saturn V, first manned launch from NASA's new Moonport, first pictures taken by humans of the Earth from deep space, and first live TV coverage of the lunar surface. And this photo showed clearly, that Rodney had been a part of that.

"Aaah Ronon... another giant puddle of something unpleasant... those men? They are the astronauts that piloted the Apollo 8 in 1968, just before man walked on the moon. This photo my friend, is not a good thing. Not a good thing at all. If Rodney was _there_ in 1968, then he can mostly certainly not be _here. _Getting my drift yet Ronan?"

"Rodney... that bad feeling... it's about to explode. Gina?" He looked down at the girl nestled at his side and watched as her gaze slid up to meet his. Her eyes were no longer clear, they appeared unfocused and he reached down to cup her chin so that he could get her to focus on him. "Gina. What's wrong?" She tried to pull her chin out of his grip, grimacing a little in the pain that shot through her head.

"Let me go John." She pulled out of the arm that had secured her to his side, backing up slightly, holding her hands out in front of her as though to ward him off. She back up against a hard wall and felt Ronon's arm snake around her middle, securing her to him, to keep her from hurting herself.

"Easy, Gina. Tell us what's going on. Why is Rodney in that picture." John kept his distance letting Ronon take over briefly, concerned by the look in her eyes. He could see in her eyes that she had grasped the meaning immediately and saw something else also. Her memories were starting to return. She struggled a little against Ronon's arm, but after flicking a glance at John, Ronon kept her tightly secured. John could see that she was becoming rapidly distressed and said quietly to Ronon.

"Keep her with you. We need to get the portal. Rodney - give me the picture. " Rodney, still staring in fascination at it, handed John the picture and he kept it in his hand,moving quickly now in the direction of the stone portal. He had started to fit the last pieces together. The very last pieces. Gina couldn't be here without consequence. Callandra had known that. Known when she had started her meddling. There was a trade, an agreement made between the ancients. In order for Gina to come to this time line , one from this time line had to replace her, in 1962.

John turned the picture over and over in his hand, thoughts spiralling through his head, boots eating up the rocky terrain with little regard or effort. Thoughts. _ Time and distance. Time and distance. _ Gina needed in both time lines to perform two jobs. Rodney needed in both time lines to perform two jobs. _Time and Distance._

Rodney got to the point at the same time that John did and he saw Rodney's steps, already struggling to keep up with his own, falter and he stopped too. The stone portal was now in sight. And there was a tangible energy coming from it, electrical - and knew that it was not just his ancient gene that registered it. He saw the look of fascination on Gina's face, mirrored also on Ronon's and he had already been through it once, so it was no mystery to him. It had a predatory look to it, waiting. For someone? For Rodney. Both Rodney and John knew this now. Waiting for Rodney. _Time and distance_.

"John? I have to go back, don't I. To take her place. She is needed here now, and I am needed then now. Oh God, John, NASA, the Apollo missions.. I'm responsible for them, aren't I? If I don't go back and stay then the missions never take place. You talked about pieces of puzzles - this had to be one of the biggest jigsaws of all time. Pieces scattered all over time and distance. _Time and distance." _ He said these words ponderingly and they became clear to John.

John's hand took Rodney's shoulder firmly, as though to hold him back. "We'll find another way Rodney, you don't have to go. You're needed here."

" No, John, it has to be this way - ask Gina, she knows. That's what she was trying to tell me the other day in the infirmary. I've done what I can here. Is this what you would call a Hail Mary Sheppard? The biggest football play of all time?"

John took a deep breath, not willing to relegate Rodney's life work to a football play, but he understood why the scientist had done it. " Yeah,Rodney, the biggest hail mary of all time. Hell, you're gonna get the biggest head of all time - needed in two galaxies in two time lines. How's that for arrogance?

Rodney's face beamed as though he suddenly understood the implications, and the possibilities. "I can make a difference Sheppard and actually get recognised for it. Here? It's all done in secret from the public. I discover something new and wonderful and who can I tell? Where can I publish? I'm an arrogant scientist. I want the world to know what I do, what I discover. This way... this way, I get my recognition."

Alarmed now, John cautioned him. "Remember Rodney, there's a game plan, and the ancients will make sure you stick to it. No taking them along faster than they're meant to go. No sneaking in gadgets and technology that they're not ready for. You have to follow the rules or the ancients will come down on you like ton of bricks. Rodney!"

Rodney nodded, and John suddenly had the urge to hold on to him and stop him doing this. "Ronon, you've said nothing. Gina?"

Ronon turned away, for all his faults he had a soft spot for Rodney, something he would never had admitted aloud. He had little understanding for what was happening, but knew that he would miss him. Whenever and whereever he went. Gina pulled free of Ronon's arm, and went straight to Rodney. Rodney touched her face softly with his hand.

" Your memory is coming back Gina, I see it in your eyes."

" I"m sorry Rodney, We both leave behind something important, but gain so much more, if you think about it hard enough. Will you spend some time with my family? Tell them I'm ok?" When he nodded, she placed her hand on top of his and saw him hesitate.

" Will you take over some of the projects I left behind, unfinished. Use that degree you've worked hard to get. There are some excellent scientists in Atlantis, they'll be more than pleased to help you and my notes are excellent." She laughed at his arrogance, recognising in herself, a little of the same thing.

" There's a discovery here that you need to make, the reason they wanted you forward in time. Sheppard is not the only reason the ancients manoevered you back here. I started something... special. You'll see and when you look over my notes, I think you'll understand and be the one. I let myself get sidetracked, or so I thought, now I know. I wasn't the one meant to finish it. You were. Perhaps you could name whatever you discover – Rodney."

John laughed then. "No naming of anything here Rodney, I thought we had long since agreed on that."

The portal was glowing now and Gina clung tightly to Rodney's arm. "Gina, get back - you can't go too close or you'll be pulled through as well." Rodney tried to disentangle himself from her, but she seemed transfixed by the purple glow that had begun to pulse. As thought drawn to it she stepped forward, but John was there, pulling her back against him, burying his face in her hair, feeling her heart racing under the hand that banded her hard against him.

"Let him go Gina." Ronon turned away but Rodney's smile was brilliant and accepting, a new adventure to discover something and make his mark on the world. All he had ever wanted to do. A wave and he was gone, and the cold planet once more dark and unforgiving, as the final three stood staring unseeing into the stone portal that had opened one more time to finish what had been started.

"Is that the end Sheppard? No more changes, no more messing around with time lines." Ronon's voice was rough, he was not good with emotion, with feelings and he just wanted their old lives back, action and strength.

John felt her body trembling against his, both with the cold and the adrenalin that had fired through her body for the past hour, and felt her collapse then, suddenly boneless and unable to support herself. He picked her up, cradling her tight against him, and with one final look at the stone portal he turned, Ronon in the lead now and made their way back to the gate. Time and distance. One there, one here. The scales had been balanced.


	43. Chapter 43 Time to Heal

CHAPTER 43 – TIME TO HEAL

The walk to the gate was cold and silent and no one felt the absent team member more than John. Hell, this was Rodney. Most annoying scientist in the universe, arrogant, uppity, sometimes downright nasty and the world's greediest pig when it came to food. So why did he feel his absence so much. Hell, this was Rodney. He filled a hole in their lives, made them think about things they would have otherwise chosen to ignore, and sometimes... just sometimes... he came out with something kind and generous. Hell, this was Rodney.

They slipped through the event horizon, respite from the cold – John still holding tightly to Gina. He didn't know if she was conscious or not. Didn't want to think too much at all right now and wondered just how the hell he was going to explain everything to Elizabeth. They needed time to heal. All of them.

Ronon didn't wait when they stepped into the gate room in Atlantis. He barely glanced at Elizabeth who came instantly down the stairs, didn't acknowledge Carson who was standing by with a gurney, nor did he speak to John or Gina who stood uncertainly in the gate room as he strode out angrily. John sighed. He knew that Ronon did not understand, and would talk to him when things had calmed down a little. Much later.

"John! Talk to me. What the hell is going on. Where is Rodney?"

"Gone, Elizabeth. Back to 1962. Rodney was needed in their time line and he took the opportunity to become the hero he's always wanted to be." He looked down at Gina, saw her clear blue eyes looking up at him questioningly, and he carefully lowered her to the ground, but shook his head gently at Carson when he moved forward to take her back to the infirmary. Carson hesitated – he didn't like her colour and the fact that she was shaky on her feet, she shouldn't have been out of the infirmary anyway. But he saw the look in the Colonel's eyes and kept his distance. Likely John was not letting go of his woman anytime soon, his arm wrapped tightly around her now as though she represented some sort of life line.

"You let my chief scientist go through that damn time portal. Tell me you didn't just do that Colonel Sheppard!" Elizabeth was pissed, no doubt about it and John tried frantically to unscramble his brain to explain why he had let him go. He couldn't find the words, but Gina did, and could. She pushed away from him, keeping hold of his hand and faced Elizabeth.

"Don't be angry at him Elizabeth – please. We're working with factors beyond our control right now. Rodney and I have spent some time together in the past couple of days and I began to understand some things, mainly through Rodney – inadvertantly he gave us a clue to what was going to happen."

"You knew Gina?" John pulled sharply on her hand, making her turn to face him. "Why didn't you say something?" She saw the anger on his face and wanted to push it away, but struggled with the words.

"Not so much knew – remember, I don't have the knowledge of what is to happen in those years after my own timeline. I have not had time here yet – to study history books and find out the important events after 1962. I know only the importance of the space programme, and Rodney spent a lot of time talking to me about this, filling me in on events and giving me his own personal history lesson. I started to realise something – he was not fulfilled here. His achievements here could never be truly recognised, not the way he wanted them to be – he spoke about how wonderful it must have been to be involved in high profile programmes such as the early NASA ones. He told me something important, something that you had not considered. The space programme wouldn't have continued, not with the way things had been left. The Soviets and Americans both started new projects in 1967 in the race to be first on the Moon, Rodney told me this. The Americans initiated Project Apollo; the Soviets, Project Soyuz. Both began with horrible disasters that set each country's space program back a year and a half. The U.S. crew were testing the new Apollo systems on the ground in January 1967. On 27 January the three crew members were inside the spacecraft that was going to be Apollo 1 breathing pure oxygen. A burst of flame seen from outside. It took six minutes for technicians and workers to open the hatch. By that time the three astronauts were dead. The interior of the craft was estimated to have reached 1,000 degrees Fahrenheit."

John's eyes had shuttered slightly and he felt her pull away from him to stand between John and Elizabeth. "That was the end of the space programme – the last piece of the puzzle John. Rodney went back to ensure that the testing in January 1967 was successful."

Elizabeth stared open mouthed at Gina. "I don't understand Gina. Even with that accident, the space programme stayed on track. It was a small setback."

"No Elizabeth, it wasn't. That is just how you remember it now. Another man would have died in that incident – a brilliant physicist, one who if he had lived would have advanced the space programme to the point where man walked on the moon. But he died, and this no longer happened. Until Rodney went back and took the place of this physicist."

"Damn it Gina – how can you know this, I can't grasp how you know... that is the difficult part for me."

Gina backed away from John a little, feeling overwhelmed by what she had suddenly remembered in that single moment when Rodney had been sucked into the time portal, and by the ferocious look in John's eyes. A look that was directed at her and the news that she imparted now.

"When Rodney went through, my memory returned. Everything. The moment that I fought my way through the darkness, the same darkness that you were in. Callandra filled me with information, like a history book. I knew so much John. So much. It was overwhelming – she showed me the rift, how to get through, but it was not without cost. My father attempted to follow, needing to make sure that I was in fact going to safety. She pulled him back, forced him to stay, then with a touch I was filled with the memories of a thousand events, so much that it overwhelmed me. I became lost in the dark, my connection pulled too tight from this side. I didn't think I would make it, but my father... something happened to him..."

Her breath hitched now and he hardened himself not to go to her – to let her finish what she had started to say. He needed to hear it all.

"He became light..."

_Ascended... my god, he ascended... why?_ The thought poured like oil through John, slick and unwelcome. _Why would Callandra force him to ascend?_

She saw the question in his eyes and answered. "To help me through the rift... To take my place here, so that Rodney could take his place here... but that is not the end John."

"I know Gina... I don't know if it will ever be the end. And I need time... to process, to think. I'm sorry, I can't be here right now. I need to go..." He held him hands up, anguish on his face and he backed away from her, not seeing the pain in her face, only knowing his own right now. Turning, he left and Gina was left standing alone – looking lost and just a little frightened, brought forth into a time where she still had the role of her life to play.

She looked at Elizabeth and saw pity on her face. "I'm sorry Gina, that you have been dragged into all this – so much of it has affected you, your family and your way of life has been changed forever. I can't help feel that we are responsible. I know there are more factors involved than just us, but for now, the line stops here, and I can only offer the apology from us... but know that it comes with sincerity. John will be fine. He's strong, but at the moment, you are his weakness and he doesn't want you to see that."

"I need to go to him Elizabeth.. please. I can't be left out in the cold. Not now."

"If you go to him now Gina, you may not like what you find. Raw emotion, can damage a person. I'm not sure you're ready to be in his firing line right now."

"Please..."

She looked carefully at the younger woman, saw the resolve there and nodded once. "I'll take you to his quarters, but don't say I didn't warn you. I sense a strength in you Gina, but be very sure this is what you want to do."

Gina followed her through the hallways until they came to John's private quarters, having assumed that he would go there. Elizabeth gave Gina a long look, and left and it was a long time during which Gina stood outside his door, that she found the courage to bring her hand up to knock on it.

There was silence on the other side. For a long time. She rested her head against the wall now, standing just off to the side, her head starting to ache, and needing more than anything to lie down and close her eyes. But not yet.

Finally footsteps were heard and the door slid open. She moved into the open doorway, but did not enter, just stood watching him. He was clad only in BDU pants, no shirt and she looked longingly at his naked chest, wanting to feel her cheek pressed up against it and tangle her fingers in the sparse hair that curled there. He saw the need in her eyes and closed his eyes briefly.

_I need her. I don't care what has gone down. I don't care about anything right now. I need her._

She didn't remember him moving, but he was in front of her and she only had to take one more step and she could rest her cheek against his warm chest while his hand came around her, cupping her bottom and dragging her against him, just as he had done earlier that day.

In the next instant of memory the door was closed and her clothes had gone. _How did they get into that pile on the ground? I was just outside the door. A microsecond ago..._ She smiled and he hooked a finger under her chin to pull her eyes back up to his.

"Share the joke... hmmm..."

"Fifty years John... I guess you could say I waited fifty years for you to touch me again.."

And touch her he did. Everywhere, a trail of passion that began at her collarbone and whispered down her spine to cause her to shiver and cling to him, knees weakened by the path his hand was taking. Slipping between her legs to gently stroke and caress, and slide the moisture along her inner thighs so that she moved her legs apart slightly and arched her back, bringing her centre in harder contact with his hand. She felt him smile against her skin, his mouth now working downward, tongue circling her erect nipples that peaked and quivered beneath this mouth.

"Fifty years is a lot of foreplay..." His mouth continued to nibble and he paused in his task briefly to deliver his comment, causing her to giggle a little, then gasp as his hands moved back up to rub against her moisture, hot and aching.

She was fumbling with his pants now, struggling a little with the zip, and laughing her pulled her hands away and walked her backwards towards the bed, turning her so that she was bent over the bed and he could run a line of hot kisses down her spine, while his hand smoothed over her stomach and arced downward , bringing her to a hot and fierce climax, her bottom pushing hard against his erection that still strained in his pants. He wasn't finished with her yet, and holding her in position, he quickly shucked off his pants and entered her hard from behind bringing her immediately to a second climax.

He made it last. Keeping the pace going until she whimpered, then stopped - holding himself back, needed to assert control over his emotions right now. When at last he could stand it no more he gave one final thrust, burying himself as deep as he could, and holding one hand tight against her stomach he emptied himself into her. Life begets life. Need begets need. Home.

She splayed on the bed, still on her stomach and he collapsed alongside her, a hand possessively running idly along her spin, her face turned toward him, blue eyes bright and questioning.

"Do you remember the dark place Gina? What was that? Why did we go there?" His hand was gentle, almost lazy, but his tone was anything but.

"We needed to strengthen the connection again, before it snapped. Both of us had weakened and we were sent there to find the strength to finish what we needed to do. Callandra told me. She told me many things before she pushed me into that rift. The journey John? It was like going to hell and back. I thought I would die. That dark place we were in was nothing. I came out battered and bruised and not knowing up from down, then when I arrived I was a blank slate. That terrified me – Angel saved me, brought me back..."

She paused then, but her hands were busy, touching him – arousing him again so that he smiled playfully at her.

"What do you think Rodney's doing right now John?"

"Lucky guy is probably enjoying a big juicy steak about now... with french fries. But just for the record? Rodney's not really on my mind right now..."

"John?"

"Hmmm...?" her hand was doing delicious things, and he would likely have promised her the moon about now.

"I'm hungry...?"

"Well sweetheart, I can take care of that..." and his own hand dipped once again into her warm centre. Stilling when it heard her stomach rumble loudly.

"Oh... that sort of hungry..."

"I haven't really eaten in two days... not so sure about the way you Lantiens treat your guests!"

And opened her eyes wide in indignation at John's roar of laughter. The best medicine of them all.


	44. Chapter 44 A Time and Place

CHAPTER 44 – A TIME AND PLACE FOR EVERYTHING

John's radio remained ominously silent for the next 24 hours. No Elizabeth, No Ronon – no security teams needing his input on anything. _No Rodney..._

They spent most of that time in bed. He had gone to the mess and filled up a tray with food – any type of food, and simply brought it back to his quarters. His shoulder ached. It had barely had time to heal and he had taken off the strapping long ago, before they had returned to the planet that had claimed Rodney through it's portal and now he was paying the price. No doubt Carson would have something sarcastic and somewhat profound to say about his decision, but he would deal with that later. It looked as though he had chosen to deal with many things later. He knew that his friend was hurting, and Ronon and himself needed to sit down and talk things out. Later. He needed to give this time to the woman who still lay in his bed, watching him with sleepy blue eyes as he got up now to have a shower.

"We can't put everything on hold John." _Dammit, those eyes were not as sleepy as they looked._ He turned to her.

"No Gina, we can't, but I feel like my whole life has been on some sort of hold switch since I woke up on that beach. I forgot which way was up and which way was down. I need to get my equilabrium back before I deal with the big picture. That's why we've been left alone until now. My radio has never been this silent, believe me. But you're right... I was hoping to hang on to ignorance for just a little while longer yet, but that's not fair on the others."

He turned to head into the shower and he had barely gotten into the door when he felt her press up hard against him and smiled. _Multi tasking... they do say women are particularly skilled at it... I'll concur with that..._

An hour later and the gang was all assembled in the conference room. John had called a general meeting. Most of the base had had some time now to deal with Rodney's disappearance, and while they had not glossed over the truth with the base personnel, most had no idea what the real implications were of what he had done. John was not really sure that he did either, but someone needed to attempt an explanation, and someone needed to give these people some clear plan to follow.

He noted that Elizabeth looked especially tired and knew that she had probably been up half the night trying to write the report that he should have really done. He didn't know that the words would have come any easier from his hand, and chose to let her do it. She was more diplomatic and would slant things in such a light that they did not come off as bumbling inept idiots. Mission reports were rarely ever written in the clear concise language that one would expect from such a report.

John was about to begin when a final group of people walked in. _Ah crap... too good to be true I guess. World war three has a damn fine chance of beginning. The general's declared war by the look of it, and the way those brown eyes are staring me down, I'm right in his sights..._

And indeed he was. General Jack O'Neill had arrived, along with Samantha Carter, Colonel Cameron Mitchell and two IOA members. John slunk down in his seat, seeing the curious gaze that Gina flicked over the late arriving group. She had no idea who they were and she was about to get the surprise of her life...

"Aaah – Colonel John Sheppard. It seems things have escalated since we last spoke. I was under the impression, and I assumed you were in full agreement, that you were going to sort this out and get things back on track. Instead I receive communication from your base commander, oh, something along the lines of a lost scientist. Make that lead scientist? Hmmmm?"

John stole a glance at Cameron to see where he sat amongst all this, but the man's face remained impassive and looked back at John with no sympathy. _Ok, so no help from that quarter. This battle's going down with me on the firing line. So be it. I've fought on my own before, and I'll damn well do it again._ Then he felt a small hand take his own and squeeze it under the table, just as he had done for her when they had gone to see Terrence O'Neill in jail. _Amend that... not on my own anymore... she's got my back. And that's all I'll ever ask for._

_Ok, _thought John. _Attack and go for the jugular – stay on the offensive, don't give them time to push you on the defensive. It's your play Sheppard. Make the pass._

"General O'Neill – with all due respect, I'm not going to be your whipping boy on this one. I was chosen yes, and I know in the past you have also been chosen by the ancients to perform tasks that have not gone as much to plan as you would have perhaps... preferred. I've read the SG1 mission reports... sir." The general nodded his head slightly in acknowledgement. No secrets there.

"I bet in 1969 you were glued to some sort of screen somewhere, watching Neil Armstrong take those first steps on the moon... and I bet also sir, that in your teenage mind, you looked on with wonder, both at that screen and at the stars and knew that this was where you wanted to be." Again that simple nod, a look of curiousity in the man's eyes.

"If I hadn't done what I did, if Rodney hadn't done what he did...those things would never have happened. We wouldn't be here. A mission with more holes than swiss cheese that needed to be plugged up. Dumb it down? That's just what I did. We plugged up the holes, ok, so we created a few small new ones, but necessary ones – at least that's how I see it. So if you're gonna jump down my throat on this one and clip my wings, look first at this woman beside me."

He shifted his glance to Gina, giving her hand a squeeze. "Gina? Meet General Jack O'Neill – Terry's brother... this is what you did, when you went to visit him in jail and gave him a chance to do something with his life – something good. The good stands before you now. A great man, our General, brought more than his share of memorable moments to the stargate programme. General – my stunt, Rodney's stunt. You wouldn't be in this point in time, if we hadn't succeeded."

"Gina. Meet Samantha Carter. No longer airforce, but one of the best fighter pilots around. Also one of the most brilliant minds around. Your mentor. Jacob's daughter. Callandra's legacy." He paused, watching as Sam eyes' gazed assessingly back into the matching blue eyes of Gina. Both eyeing one another up and saw Samantha smile as she recognised something in the younger woman.

"Gina. Meet Colonel Cameron Mitchell..." and waited while she turned to look at him upon hearing the surname. "Your brother's son..." Cameron had paled a little and his face no longer kept the impassive look he had struggled to maintain. He had gotten up from his seat and moved around the table, behind John and Gina and had rested a hand gently on her shoulder.

"Dad talked about you a lot when I was growing up, your death and how close you had been when you were younger. He missed you so much. I wish he could see you now. I wish Grandpop could have lived to see you now. I never knew him – he died before I was born. Died helping somebody to do something, at least that's what my dad told me..." His keen eyes looked down into hers and he squeezed her shoulders. "But you know something Gina... I saw Grandpop a few times. Watching over me. I knew who he was – sometimes he would just turn up, be there and once he sat at the end of my bed and told me all about you, about what you had done. I was only young then, and thought it was a dream, but when John here came to the SGC and told us his story, I realised that it had happened."

Elizabeth was watching the players carefully. "Did your father ascend Gina? Is that how he managed to get you through the rift?"

"I couldn't do it alone, and Callandra was unable to help. The ancients had clipped her wings so to speak, for meddling too much already." She smiled at the sight of Jack O'Neill rolling his eyes. "He ascended so that he could guide me through the rift. Even with him there, it was the most horrible journey I could imagine. There's things trapped in there... horrible things. Things that don't want you to make it to the other side." She fingered her bandage now as the memory of that journey came crashing back and a look of pain crossed her face. "I didn't think I would make it, even with Dad pushing me through from one side. Then I saw a man waiting on the other side. Rodney. Waiting not so patiently. He was smiling, but waving his hands around impatiently."

This brought a bark of laughter from John. He could imagine Rodney doing just that. Never the most patient man.

"He kept telling me things, then getting annoyed when I didn't seem to listen. I did listen – I just didn't know how to respond. He told me about things that were going to happen in my near future – my old future and how those things would go wrong. If I had survived the accident, then I would have been the one to fix them, not Rodney. I was orginally the one handpicked for the job. But something changed. Not in my future. In the present. I was needed here. So they needed someone back there, to take my place. Consider the implications – it had been beautifully orchestrated. If this had been a giant chess board, consider just how intricate all the moves have been to get to this point."

The General spoke up again. The story had fascinated him and he had known that it would be an incredibly complex one. The IOA members had remained ominously silent and he sensed that they had no idea how they were going to go back and report his one.

"This point... Gina. What is this point? I think that's where my confusion lies now. I'll gloss over most of what has happened to date, including Rodney taking his impatient self back to another time line just to get some sort of recognition." Sam grinned at this and gave Jack's arm a squeeze. She really was quite fond of Rodney in her own way, and had loved to wind him up, arguing against his theories just to get a reaction.

"But what I really need to get a grasp on is this. What crap storm is still to come...?"

_Aaah O'Neill...therein lies the conundrum... for until it does, even we have not been made privy to that information. From here on in, we fly blind. No clues, no ancients guiding us. They got us to this point. From here? It is our future.. pre destined maybe, but they are not allowed to show us beyond this point. So... that crapstorm General... when it hits, I hope to god that we get time to batten down the hatches... _


	45. Chapter 45 Bridges to Mend

CHAPTER 45 – BRIDGES TO MEND

The meeting went better than expected. And longer. They asked a lot of questions and John understood why. It was difficult to comprehend. Perhaps the most poignant moment had been when he had tossed the picture of Rodney taken beside the Saturn V rocket onto the table and seen the shocked faces. That is when the new version of the old reality had hit them. The visitors from earth. They saw then, that this step had changed the dynamics of an entire programme. And seeing Rodney's smiling face, albeit arrogant one, had brought a large smile of it's own to Sam Carter's face and she had leaned slightly against the General. This had made John's eyebrows raise slightly. Sam had been careful always, to keep her feelings about the General totally private. Obviously some things had changed back on earth since she had left the SGC.

John had left them then, after excusing himself and leaving the visitors in Elizabeth's hands. He leaned down briefly to kiss Gina on the cheek and murmured in her ear. "Later sweetheart. I have some bridges to mend. Ronon's taken this pretty hard – obvious really when he didn't even bother to turn up for this meeting. I need to smooth the way between us again. He's one of the good guys, the best. I need to make sure he understands." She smiled at him, but saw the way that Cam's eyes followed them and hardened slightly as John left the room. She suspected that Grandpop, when he had come to visit Cam, had given him some clear instructions on exactly what to do to John if he messed his precious daughter around. Chuckling to herself, she caught Cam's eye and raised her eyebrows, laughing a little louder when she saw he had the good sense to look slightly embarassed. Yep, General Nate had been meddling...

Ronon and Teyla were sparring together in the rec room. They had been at it for some time, sweat covered their bodies and John saw by their serious faces that their focus had brought them closer to their own thoughts. Neither appeared to have any injuries. They were evenly skilled partners. While Teyla was the much smaller of the two by far, she was fluid to watch, her movements styled and canny and Ronon large and fast, was sometimes no match for her delicate and intricate movements. John stood for some time in the door way watching them. He knew they were aware of his presence, however it did not appear to distract them in any way and he was simply content just to watch them for now.

Finally Ronon threw down his stick and stalked away. Picking up a towel he scrubbed it hard over his face, his glance shooting in John's direction, waiting for the other man to take the lead.

"Missed you two at the meeting." John kept his tone light.

Teyla looked slightly discomforted. "I am sorry Colonel, if this brought you trouble in any way. We considered it earth business and did not feel as though our presence was either needed nor welcomed."

She spoke for the both of them, thought John. Her glance had been to Ronon first, to make sure that he was content for her to be the spokesperson. Ronon remained still, brooding but he was looking at John as though waiting for something.

"I would have liked the support of my team. The earth representatives came to Atlantis on a witch hunt and guess who they wanted to tie up at the stake. You may not understand what went down – or even agree with it. But I'd like to think that I've taught you something in my time as leader of this team. We stay together. One goes down, we all go down."

Teyla looked slightly ashamed and did take her glance from John. He did not sound angry. He had deliberately kept anger from his voice, choosing instead to insert a hard quality that they did not often hear from him. Censure.

"I understand that you're upset and disappointed about Rodney leaving the way he did. I even get that you think I left you out of the loop. Not true. I wasn't even in the loop most of the time. The players in this arrogant little game were kept apart most of the time and you have to understand. It turned out that Rodney was one of those key players. That pretty much made his day..."

He saw the glimmer of a smile on Ronon's face, and knew that he was making some progress in explaining some of the events that had occurred over the last two weeks. Or was it three now? John had lost count. Flitting between time lines had blurred the edges of his current time and he needed a straight run in this one to place himself firmly back in the commander's chair again. This was his team, his people and he needed them to trust him and to back him up. Without that, the team fell apart. Yes, Rodney had been a member of their team too, an important part. But they'd move right on along without him, knowing that he was doing what he was meant to do – somewhere else.

"I need to know that you guys have got my back. At the moment, I'm not getting that. This us against them crap? Don't pull that on me Teyla. There is no us against them. The earth visitors came here to get the full story – you guys were a part of that story and needed to be there to support me. I don't want that to happen again. Copy that?"

Ronon and Teyla both nodded and John knew that his approach had been the right one. This was his team and as their leader they needed to look at him with respect, not disappointment.

"Will you ask Gina to take his place on the team? I understand that she is to take over some of his projects with the help of Radek."

John knew that much hinged on his answer. Gina wasn't ready to join his team, or any other team. She needed to get her feet wet in the Pegasus galaxy first, find her way not just in the city, but in her role here. He wouldn't throw her into missions until she was ready and he needed Teyla and Ronon to know that she was not to be considered a liability in any way.

"She's got her own role to play here. For now, it'll be the three of us. We'll do ok – and if we need outside help on a mission, we've got a huge pool of people to choose from. And we'll choose wisely, together. Ok people?"

John saw the relief in Ronon's eyes and knew he'd given them the right answer. Ronon didn't want any distractions when they were out on a mission and knew that Gina would provide more than a distraction for John.

"So Sheppard – you up for some sparring time? Teyla just got me warmed up..." Ronon's smile was a little devilish now, wanting too to get their friendship back on it's old footing.

"I've still got the damn bandage from the last session..." and gingerly he touched the small cut that had required a dose of the special glue that Carson used to patch them up quickly. But he did look longingly at the sticks and shrugging his shoulders, figured it was as good a way as any to make things right between them.


	46. Chapter 46 Schrodingers Cat

CHAPTER 46 – SCHRODINGERS CAT

She let him spend the balance of the day with his team. She had sensed the discord when they had been on _P8T198. _She trusted Ronon and Teyla and knew that given the chance, they would have her back and protect her with their lives. That was the code that they lived by. If she was important to John, then that made her part of their world also. The discord had come due to the association with Rodney leaving. Taking her place. Ronon was a simple man and saw things in black and white. Her being in Atlantis had brought some shades of gray and she knew that he would have difficulty seeing these shades clearly.

She pondered how to let him know that she would not get between his friendship and John and would not upset the dynamics of their team. John had told her that she would be city based and would not go offworld, unless a certain need was created and a physicist was required on a particular mission. She intended to argue this point when she next saw him. While she had chosen not to make waves, at least not in the beginning, she did not intend to leave them without an mission physicist and he would have to come to terms with the fact that if she was to attempt to even fill a small part of Rodney's role, then she needed to have some of the freedom to do it.

It was several hours later that John finally found her. He had eaten in the mess with his team, pushed her briefly out of his mind, knowing that she was likely busy familiarising herself with the city. Also resting. Carson had made it clear that she was to rest every few hours, still uncertain that the effects from her head injury were not going to manifest itself in other ways.

He stood in the doorway of Rodney's lab where she was shoulder to shoulder with Radek Zalenka who was gesturing excitedly at the pile of notes that were spread out on the table before them. She had a somber look on her face, and Radek repeatedly touched her arm to get her attention and John groaned. It looked as though the little scientist had developed a small crush on the lady from 1962. Just what he needed. To have to declare himself. Not really in the mood for a pissing contest, at least not with Radek. The guy had confidence issues as it was, and thanks to working side by side with Rodney for the past five years, he had hidden his light under a bushell for some time now. Perhaps now he would have a chance to shine a little.

"Interupting something, guys?" John pushed away from the doorway and moved into the room and he saw the nervous look in Radek's eyes as he took in the coiled energy that flowed through the Colonel. Muttering something in his native language he stepped away from Gina, moving to the other side of the table. He did not want to get on the bad side of the larger man with the dangerous eyes.

"Hey John. Radek and I have been running through the last notes that Rodney left. Obviously the whole time travel thing had fascinated him more than anyone here knew. Most of his later notes are about time travel and most of his research into the ancient data base is regarding their time travel – and what they had documented up until the time they left. I think he was trying to tell us something with these notes... without telling us anything.. if you get my meaning?"

Radek was nodding energetically as though in complete agreement with her. "Yes yes yes, the notes are all relating to time travel Colonel. And not just the stone portal on _P8T198. _He's been a busy boy for some time now, and I had no idea he was looking into this. His notes say he found something down in one of the lower levels, but he hadn't mentioned anything to me before about it. Do you think it is something to do with the rift? Perhaps this wasn't all such a surprise for him? Knowing Rodney, he'll likely keep this to himself until he can announce some big discovery."

Radek appeared to run out of steam, in the face of the now scowling Colonel. "I'm sure if Rodney had discovered anything of that importance he would have told somebody. If not you, then Elizabeth."

Gina had watched the nervousness that had crept into Radek's demeanor as John's dangerous edge started to sharpen and saw him move carefully around the table as if to attempt to escape the Colonel before he pounced on him. She took pity on the scientist – she had enjoyed his company that afternoon, found him kind and easygoing. She moved toward John now and placed a calming hand on his arm, rubbing softly to still him.

"Don't be so grumpy John. It's not Radek's fault if Rodney was holding back... hmmm?" She looked up at him innocently with those blue eyes and his posture changed, moving closer to her and blocking out Radek who breathed a sigh of relief and shot Gina a grateful look. "Rodney told me when he spent time in the infirmary with me, that he had been working on something important. Something he had yet to share with anyone. He was missing important information in order to reach a conclusion, but he had said he was close. These notes seem to mainly be about time travel... and perhaps something else, something I prefer not to go into yet."

"So that's what you were talking about – you and Rodney?" Johm murmured. "He already knew then, didn't he. He was priming you, getting you ready to take over – this one special project, something he knew he wouldn't have the time to finish... Oh Rodney.. what have we opened this time..."

Gina picked up a handful of Rodney's notes. "He talked about Schrodingers cat, John – is this term familiar to you? This is a hypothetical experiment in which a cat was put inside a box with some equipment which releases poisonous gas on detection of electrons. In this case, after an hour, one would say that he doesn't know whether the cat is dead or alive, and this can be known only by looking inside the box. But according to quantum theory, it is better to say the cat is half dead or half alive, until one can check on it. Confused! Actually it is based on the basic assumption of probability and not the fact. Fact comes in picture when we actually see inside the box, till then it's all about probability. This particular theory in quantum physics is often scorned by scientists because there is no basis, no way to elicit actual proof – every action that is made simply changes the probability."

John's body had slumped slightly and Radek watched the slight glazing of his eyes and hid a smile. This was an unusual pairing – the Colonel and Gina. "John, I know this is likely off the scale for you, but it is a leap from _this"_ – here she held up a handful of Rodney's notes - "to existential dimensions. Rodney was interested not just in time travel, but multiple and parallel universes. The schrodingers cat theory is a non proven theory regarding the existence of more than one universe." Again she rattled his notes, this time moving away from John and going to stand beside Radek – who in light of the way that John's eyes suddenly narrowed at this action, chose to take a safe step back from her.

"The theory of schrodinger's cat is a paradoxical thought experiment that illustrates the concept of parallel universes. Quantum suicide and quantum immortality, the basic idea that a person who dies in one parallel universe should survive in another parallel universe as both options clearly exist in the schrodinger cat theory. Now the very nature of our lives is one of being aware that we are alive, so the only possible parallels open to us are the ones in which we are alive."

John's eyes were no longer glazed. "He was hoping to do more than go back in time, wasn't he Gina. The arrogance of that damn man. He wanted to exist in more than one universe. Aaah Rodney... and he was not able to complete what he started. Why did he think you could continue this for him Gina. I understand Rodney's arrogance, but involving someone else in his project? That I don't understand. It is also not proven, completely theoretical – and quite frankly Gina, I think it best if you were to stay away from this particular area of Rodney's thinking... I think it's dangerous – unproven and dangerous."

Her smile was a little forced, not wanting to argue with John about her intended involvement in Rodney's aborted project but needing to explain Rodney's thought process, just a little. It seemed unfair that the scientist was not here to defend his own rationale, and to have John dismiss it out of hand brought a small amount of impatience to Gina.

"Remember Callandra telling us that a person can only exist in one time line at once? When you stayed too long in my timeline, and essentially you still existed in this one, your body started to weaken and there were effects. Catastrophic effects. Work it out John... what do you think Rodney was trying to do?"

He thought and it wasn't that much of a leap – she was right. Rodney accused the ancients of arrogance but this would take first prize. Rodney was working of how to exist in one time line of one universe and another timeline in a parallel universe.

_Scrhodingers Cat – Sam Carter named the cat she gave to her To'kra friend Martouf. Sam had started work on this parallel universe theory also. When Rodney went back to rescue me he saw an opportunity to expand his research and when he knew that he had the chance to go back to 1962 he took it, but not for the reasons we thought he did. Not just for kudos he would receive for his work on the space programme. He's going to deliberately plant the seeds in Sam Carter's mind. He's found a way. Soon, things here are going to change. Soon, if what Rodney plans comes to pass, we may find that little rift down there, the one tucked deep into the city, safe and out of reach for most – is more than just a rift. It is likely a doorway to a parallel universe. _

And he knew that he would do whatever it took to keep Gina from going anywhere near Rodney's research. It was dangerous, untested and he would not lose her to something that Rodney had in his arrogance and folly, begun to meddle in. Some things were meant to be left alone. Time travel had been forced upon them – he would do his best to make sure that the whole parallel universe theory remained just that and firmly out of Gina's reach. Let Sam play around with it if she had to – that was her call and not his business. But he had made Gina his business when he brought her here and he would protect her with his life.


	47. Chapter 47 A Touch of Normal

CHAPTER 47 – A TOUCH OF NORMAL

John watched the pallor come to her face and saw her falter. She had pushed herself today, spending too much time in Rodney's lab, trying too hard to fit herself into even a small corner of Rodney's too big shoes. It had been cruel of Rodney to push her into this position and while it was likely that he had recognised in Gina, the same drive that took him to his many great finds – he had a history with the stargate programme and the advantage of being from this time. Gina was already hopping two steps behind – make that fifty years behind. John failed to see how she could help fit Rodney's missing puzzle pieces, unless he needed someone with an unclouded eye, someone who saw possibilities and probabilities from an earlier time, uncluttered by modern perception and prejudice.

"Enough Gina – Rodney's an ass for expecting you to step up and follow all this. If he was here right now, I'd kick his butt all the way back to earth. That wasn't fair what he did, put all this pressure on you to continue something in all likelihood, he would not be able to complete."

"I saw the look on your face John – you know it can be done. You know he's close, and you suspect he's doing something in my present to expedite his work."

"This is your present now Gina.. .that is your past..." John gently took her hand, wanting to lead her away. "And your present man is telling you enough is enough for now – time to eat, get out of here and play nice in our safe single universe, in our own time. I promised you normal, we've yet to get to that point yet. Everything we've experienced has been extraordinary. Tonight – now, we have normal. So sweetheart, take my hand and allow me to escort you to our delightful mess where we shall sample the delights our less than ambitious base chef has decided to attempt tonight. No guarantees there, some of the offerings leave little to be desired. But normal we shall have, just for tonight. Then I shall take you dancing out on the east pier, courtesy of my ipod and external speakers and once I have plied you with Ruus wine, we shall adjourn to our room... for more intimate pleasures. Does that sound... normal?"

Gina leaned comfortably against him, glad that Radek had made his escape earlier. His words were for her alone.

"So, we leave poor Schrodingers cat in here for tonight? Seal it back up until we decide what to do about him? Or do you let me have a go at what he started? If you say no, I'll find a way... just so you know... I'm not too good with orders... sir..."

"Cheeky wench... come here..." and he pulled her tightly against him covering her giggles with the hard kiss that silenced her, just as it was meant to. "See the word Colonel on my uniform? That makes me in charge..."

"In or out of the bedroom.. hmmm?" Laughing now she pulled away from him and went to gather up Rodney's notes. "He knew what he was doing John, knew that my mind would not let it rest, just as his didn't... guess he knew me better than I thought he did. Or he's already met me in another universe..."

"Out! Now!" John's stern voice had her quickly packing up and barely avoiding his hand which went to swat her rear end none too gently.

"Ok.. going..."

They had their normal, their ordinary and John allowed himself to relax for the first time in almost a month. He tried to keep his mind firmly away from all that had happened, but unbidden the odd thought would come spiralling to the surface. A little difficult to shut it down completely when the woman beside him was a part of all that happened to this point. He sat across from her – as promised, a simple dinner in the mess and smiled at the look of distaste that crept across her face. He had been right. The food did leave little to be desired almost as though the chef had compromised distance for quality.

"I cannot imagine one getting overweight around here John. Do you manage to sneak in supplies from earth, tastier ones?"

He laughed, reaching across to hold her hand, turning it over to idly trace patterns on the palm. "Sometimes we get invited to gatherings and festivals offworld and get to sample the local fare from other planets. That can be an interesting experience. Some of the food you need to have eaten since birth to have an type of appreciation for. Some are just plain unpalatable – on those occasions, we come back to Atlantis and the food doesn't seem too bad. Other times, it's a matter of need really. You force it down because you need the fuel. But yes, I sneak food in all the time... popcorn, one of my weaknesses."

She pushed her tray away, wrinkling her nose. "Sorry John, perhaps I could offer to give your chef some cooking lessons.. you promised me dancing... and other things." She smiled at him and he wasted little time in helping her out of her seat.

"A date, of sorts. We've known each other almost a month and have never been on a date. Time I remedied that...hmmm?"

He proceeded to do just that. Holding her close while swaying to nondescript music coming from the small external speakers he had plugged his ipod into out on the east pier, she sighed contentedly. Head resting on his shoulder, she paused occasionally to look up at the stars that glittered like cold hard diamonds in the sky above and felt a shiver of knowledge that these stars were not the ones she had spent hours looking at on earth. She swayed in the arms of a man who was fifty years in her old future, on a planet in a galaxy she could not have comprehended a short time ago. And had been left a legacy by a scientist who now took her place in her own time line. To help expedite a programme that was only in it's infant stage.

Normal and ordinary? Her life could never be considered normal and ordinary, not any more. Normal was her old life where she went through each day with slightly baited breath, waiting for something to happen, on edge and unknowing – always with that glimmer of knowledge that she was meant to do more than what she had allowed herself.

Normal and ordinary? Pushed through a rift in time by a father and aunt who no longer took human form, but who had become ascended beings. One who had been on earth for more than 10,000 years. Sent forward in time fifty years to be with a man for a reason that still waited self consciously at the back of her mind, waiting for them all to make the connection. Sent forward in time to complete a project that she already knew would consume her in more ways than one.

_Normal and ordinary. Every moment of my life from the day I was born led me to this point. I am the catalyst that has changed all these lives. Not John with his ancient gene – he was simply my guide. Normal and ordinary..._


	48. Chapter 48 Too Much Too Soon

CHAPTER 48 – TOO MUCH TOO SOON

The culmination of their night had been far from ordinary. He lay beside her in bed very early the next morning, the darkness still a constant outside his balcony, the soft breeze from the water coming in through the open doors. Her hair tickled his shoulder and he touched it gently with one finger, continuing the journey down her arm, across her breast and down her stomach... then lower. She murmured something in her sleep and he smiled. He knew he should let her sleep, but couldn't help himself. Dipping a finger inside her warmth he felt her body immediately squirm and looking down at her saw that her blue eyes were open and laughing at him.

"Normal, huh? Can't seem to get enough can you, Mr Normal?"

"Nope... could do this forever... touching you like this..." His fingers slid smoothly and her smile became a sigh, then a moan as sensations raced through her, building her to a steady and undeniable climax. When he felt her shudder against him he rolled her smoothly and entered her in one stroke, watching her eyes widen, then gleam wickedly. _Normal and ordinary. This lady was anything but and the things she made him feel? He could write a book on the spectrum of emotions she had invoked in him. But normal and ordinary? He was deluding himself there. They were meant for much more..._

He fell asleep again with those thoughts in his head and never felt her leave the bed, rest a gentle hand on his unruly dark hair and smile down at him. He looked at peace for the first time since she had met him, as though his demons had finally gone back to the hell from whence they had come. She had work to do, and just as she knew it would, it had already begun to consume her. Rodney's work. Rodney's legacy. It needed to be completed.

She gathered his notes together, excellent just as he had told her but could already see that he had missed some small patterns that had not presented itself to him. Rodney had been attempting to prove that you could be in two places at once without consequence, not just in time, but in dimension but when he had begun his research he had not allowed for the fact that a safeguard, a fail safe – was needed. The same as those the ancients had designed for the time portal. She picked up his hand held computer now, having surmised that most of the data had been stored in there and left his laboratory. She had a little field trip to make.

When John awoke two hours later the bed was empty and cold and he threw back the covers, concerned that she was perhaps ill. His quarters showed no sign of her and he saw that her clothes had gone. Showering quickly he threw his own on forcing himself to relax. Likely she had gone to get some fresh air, a walk – hell they weren't glued to one another. He just thought that she would be there when he woke up. Again.

He did a circuit of the more obvious places within the city that she was likely to be. At least in his mind. Ending up in the mess he found Ronon and Teyla,chatting together over toast and coffee and at his grim look, Ronon's eyebrows raised slightly.

"Lost her already Sheppard? You've got that look on your face."

"Actually Ronon, nail on the head man. She's been gone a couple of hours. Likely she's just taken Angel for a walk somewhere, but I've got that damn testosterone powered need to keep her in sight – at least for now. Hate that I feel that way and I don't want to smother her, but this time and distance crap, I'm scared the string is a tenuous one and scared I guess... she just won't be there anymore. Until I can get a handle on that, I'll stick to the smothering thing... and hope to hell I don't drive her away!"

Teyla smiled sympathetically. "Would you like us to help you look for her John. Discreetly. So it doesn't appear you are keeping watch on her. Perhaps I could engage her in a womanly activity, or instruct her in my culture a little. There is much she needs to learn about the city. I would be honoured to spend a little time each day giving her instruction."

"Train her Sheppard, or get one of the marines to. If she's ever going to go offworld, she'll need some sort of combat, weapons training. We can't have her running around the galaxy with no means of self defence. Or not able to watch our backs. Get my drift?"

"Yeah Ronon, I got that. I guess where she's concerned, I'm not thinking clearly at the moment, thinking with the wrong parts. You're right. She needs to spend time getting up to speed on everything around here. Teyla, thank you. I will talk to her about what you suggested and if you could find some time each day to do this, I would be most appreciative. Ronon? Why don't you train her? You've trained all our other teams, you're the best weapons and hand to hand fighter we have here in Atlantis. She's been around military all her life, so weapons are not likely to be a problem."

"Babysit her Sheppard? You're asking us to babysit her? She'll skin you alive, man."

"Only is she finds out Ronon. Keep it discreet. If I follow her around all day, then she'll certainly know it's a babysitting thing, but if I get you guys on board, it'll seem more legit."

"I speak for myself Colonel Sheppard, but I will be happy to assist. I am growing fond of her and would like the opportunity to spend more time with her and get to know her better." She looked at Ronon, knowing that opposition, if it was to come, would be from him. The big Satedan could be unpredictable and stubborn, especially if he really didn't want to do something, but she saw him nod once.

"I'll do it John, but because you're my friend. I'm not sure about her yet. You know I don't trust easily and as I don't understand her reasons for being here, I'm not comfortable with her."

"I got that Ronon... and I respect your feelings. But I don't want to see her hurt. It wasn't her choice to come here, she's here by design not her own actions and I want it to be a smooth transition for her, not a scary and unpleasant one. You guys are my friends, as well as part of my team. Consider this one of our team building activities."

"Sort of like movie night..." Teyla smiled at Ronon, knowing that the Satedan enjoyed this particular team building ritual.

"And I can teach her anything to do with combat. Anything?" He saw the gleam in Ronon's eye and was about to argue, but stopped himself. And hoped that Gina would be able to handle herself with Ronon. The big guy would be out to prove something, and he wouldn't be able to interfere too much, especially since he had been the one to ask the favour. He caught Teyla's eye and she nodded carefully at him, immediately understanding his concern. Teyla would make sure that Ronon was gentle.

He heard Angel barking and that was his first clue. The second was the sneezes that came in quick succession and he grinned. Maybe they hadn't lost Rodney afterall. Seems like Gina had stepped up to take his place in more ways than one. But he was concerned by where he had found her. He stood in the doorway of the room where the time rift was located, the room they had found her in just days ago. Where she now sat in the semi darkness, having arranged a row of lanterns on a bench so that some light permeated into the otherwise dark room - Angel sniffing around the room, having done her job in alerting John to their presence here.

"Gina, whatcha doing in here. This room is out of bounds, Elizabeth made that perfectly clear. The sign on the outside of the door pretty much reinforces that just in case you had forgotten. But somehow I don't think you had... hmmm?"

She was dusty and had smudges of dirt on her face. She sat on the floor, near where he had found her, back hard against the wall holding something in her hand. He noticed that Rodney's hand held computer was on the floor beside her and wondered how she had managed to retrieve the data inside it. Knowing that Rodney would have had it strictly password protected. She understood how Rodney's mind worked, thought John. That much was starting to become clear.

She hadn't replied to him, hadn't looked up at him and he squatted down now beside her in the dust, and reached out to wipe a smudge of dirt from her face.

"Gina. Why are you down here. And what's in your hand?" He reached out to open her hand - she had attempted to cover what she held, to hide it from him? He wasn't sure. Perhaps to hide it from herself and the questions that had no doubt come to surface. In the palm of her hand lay the hand held heat infuser, the one that remained a black hole in his memory, at least from the first time he had supposedly tried it out.

"Gina, where did you get that? Did you bring it down here?" Still no reply from her and he took her chin firmly in his hand now, and pulled her face around gently, wanting her to look at him.

It was with reluctance that she brought her eyes up to meet his.

"I found it here, on the floor. It's the same one. The same one that Rodney had with him on _P8T198_ before he went through the portal. Did he take it through with him? I can't remember. Why can't I remember something like that? I can see it in his hand, and the look on your face - you were angry that you could still not remember the first time you and Rodney played around with it. I could see that in your eyes, but didn't really understand then,why that was so important to you. I think I do now. But I need to remember if he took it with him."

"Gina, snap out of it. Now. You're sitting here on a dirty cold dusty floor with a device in your hand, trying to remember something inconsequental."

Her eyes sparked now and he involuntarily shifted back a little, letting go of her chin.

"Inconsequential? Don't belittle this - you certainly didn't days ago when you realised that it was not in your memory. You didn't then, so don't do it now. I found this here John, on the floor - in this room. By what has been previously used as a time rift. If this is the same one that Rodney had then it is more than consequential. It has implications you need to seriously consider as being a possible security threat to this base."

He saw the censure in her gaze and heard the anger in her voice and was taken back by it. "Gina, where is all this coming from? Yes, I was angry that I couldn't remember the device, and yes, it is still a damn black hole where that memory should be. But why are you angry? Because I don't see it as important anymore?"

She pushed at him to get him to move, then moved effortlessly to her feet, back still hard against the wall. She felt a little threatened by him as he mirrored her movements, bringing him close in front of her and he placed a hand on one side of her against the wall, to keep her from moving again.

"You're not making sense sweetheart... security threat to the base? This device. You've been at this for hours I think, and need to step back and look at things through clear eyes."

She ducked under his arm, needing a little distance from him, and he grabbed for her as she moved past, but he was too slow and when he turned she was already on the other side of the room, shifting the device from hand to hand. He found himself mesmerised by that movement and had to drag his eyes upward to meet her blue ones, not so calm, and not so gentle. They had a fierce light in them, with dark smudges underneath that showed she still ran on low fuel.

"I've figured out something John, just as Rodney knew I would - knew I would if he wasn't here. You have no memory of this device because it didn't exist in that particular dimension."

She didn't quantify her comment, just continued the light tossing of the device from hand to hand. He stalked silently around the table, his very motion causing her to move backwards until he was in front of her again and she had pushed herself back against the wall. He gripped the device before she could transfer it the other hand. Tossing the device down on the table he grabbed one of her wrists, gripping it tightly and pulled her towards him.

"Explain. Now." His voice was clipped. He was Colonel John Sheppard now, not the considerate lover she had shared the bed with last night. And he was angry.

"Schrodingers cat John. Let me go, you're hurting." She twisted slightly to pull away, only succeeding in causing his grip to tighten and she cried out. "Damn it John. Let me go."

He didn't appear to listen, kept his grip firm and his eyes on hers. "That is not a damn cat Gina,and this is no stupid quantum mechanics experiment. There is one reality. One dimension and sweetheart, we are both in it. You're barking up the wrong tree and so was Rodney. Time travel is bad enough, but let's get one thing straight Gina. Get yourself too caught up in Rodney's theories and assumptions and his outright arrogance, and you'll find yourself crashing down so hard that you head spins. Stay grounded Gina. Do the obvious, do what needs to be done. Leave the theoretical for someone else, someone who has their feet planted firmly in this timeline. You are still getting settled in this one and this will just send you somewhere you don't need to go right now."

His voice was hard and when he suddenly released her wrist, his eyes flickered down involuntarily and he saw the red marks that he had made and shut his eyes briefly. He had let his anger take over, had failed to keep that calm centre that had been his safe place to go to. She had forced him there,to this point and he felt that anger boil up again. _Not her fault John, damn it. Not her fault. Rodney put this in her head. Rodney set the pace on this one so don't take it out on her._

Softer now, he repeated. "There is only one dimension Gina - you need to realise that and live in this one. Rodney was wrong."

"Are you sure of that John? Think back about other things that someone has mentioned, that is not familiar to you and should be. I'll wager that it's not just this device. Rodney's theory - expansion on Schrodingers cat. He thinks there is a dimensional portal here, in Atlantis. Theoretical physics attributes that there are an infinite number of parallel universes, but as yet unproven because we have not found the way to get to them. Rodney has been documenting times and events, where things have appeared here in Atlantis, while some have mysteriously disappeared. While one person remembers one things, and someone remembers another. He thought that we shifted sometimes, certain people at different times, between one or more dimensions but because they are all almost indentical, we would never know. There would only been fractional differences, ones that we would likely not even pick up... except when a certain colonel realised that he had a black hole regarding one particular device. And attributed this to memory loss from time travel..."

"Because I made a fuss..." his voice was soft now.

"Because you made a fuss John. Ordinary small things, forgotten or changed.. most likely never picked up. And larger things? Put down to simple memory loss. And the shifts - likely not happening all the time, but occasional random shifts - it may never happen to some people, those whose routine never differs - they take the same paths, the same hallways, use the same rooms each day. The dimensional shifts, if Rodney's theory proves true, occur in places and are more likely to occur if you are using different areas, not taking the same paths."

"I still don't accept these theories - I'm sorry Gina. I'm sorry to show anger before, at you - when none of this is your fault, and I'm sorry for his..." he pointed to her wrist, where she had absently rubbed at the reddened marks. "I would never hurt you intentionally. But I can't accept those theories of Rodney's, there is no proof - it is all conjecture and sounds like something Rodney dreamed up because he was bored."

"You're acting as though you think I should know better! First you treat me like a child..." He voice drifting off and she turned so that she was not looking at him. His radio clicked on then and impatiently he activated it to hear Elizabeth's voice.

"I'm in the lower level lab, the one where we found Gina... yes, I know it's off limits Elizabeth. I had to deal with something..." when he turned back the 'something' had gone - along with her little white dog and he huffed an impatient breath, thinking that perhaps he hadn't handled that situation as well as he could have and that the babysitting idea he had sprung on Ronon and Teyla was one of his better ones. If she was chasing Rodney's off the cuff and unproven theories about dimension shifting, he certainly wanted nothing to do with it and would do his best to ensure that she didn't either. He'd find other ways to keep her busy. There was ample work to be done in other areas and he would have a talk with Elizabeth about just where to direct her skills. Feeling better about that decision he had just made he went to leave the room, missing the fact that the hand held heat infuser was suddenly no longer on the table. Where he had left it.


	49. Chapter 49 Babysitting Duties

CHAPTER 49 – BABYSITTING DUTIES

He was feeling more than just a little grumpy by the time he made it back to Elizabeth's office. She looked at him reprovingly when he walked in and flopped somewhat crankily in the chair in front of her desk.

"Colonel - I thought I made it quite clear that I wanted no one in that room, at least until we had some firm understanding of what it actually was. And without Rodney here... let's just say that it may be a long term decision. I don't know that there is anyone else here qualified enough to poke around in unknowns such as that rift. And who knows what else might be in that room? I don't even think Rodney was qualified enough to deal with those black theories. Please don't tell me that Gina was down there again..."

"I could tell you that, but I'd only be lying..."

"Damn it John. I need you to keep her reined in for now. Until she gets her sea legs so to speak. Not only has she undergone a traumatic experience, she's got to find her feet in this galaxy before she tackles any of Rodney's half touched work. I insist on that John, and expect you to enforce it."

"You want me to play the heavy with her? Tried that this morning, and it didn't go down so well. She thinks Rodney needs her to finish something. Far be it from me to interfere between whatever little arrangement that they sorted out between them, I totally agree with you. She does need to start off slow, but she's headstrong and determined. And I don't have as much say in the matter as I'd like. I don't think the heavy handed approach is the best one with her. She needs a little more discreet managing... if you get my drift."

"You have a plan I take it Colonel? I want her to fit in here, and I don't think leaping head on into Rodney's brain waves is the way to do it. She'll overload and crash and burn."

"A plan in progress. With Ronon and Teyla's help. We'll keep her too busy to have any spare time to fit any of Rodney's work into her routine. For now anyway. But I'm certainly not going to let her into my little plan. She's got more than just steel in her spine. She's got one fiery little temper on her, and I kinda want to stay on her good side - at least as much as I can, right now. If you know what I mean..."

Elizabeth gave a small smile. "Copy that John. Let me know if you need me to 'guide' her into anything particular. I agree about the heavy handed approach - works with some, kid gloves and subtley have a better effect with others. Good luck. Before you go... have you noticed anything different or unusual since Rodney left? Nothing that appears to have changed? I need everyone to be vigilant about possible ripples - anything suspicious I need reported to me immediately. Sam Carter has taken this little project under her wing - she took Rodney's leaving quite hard and will fill some of the gap he left behind. She's keen to work with Gina also, but I have stressed to her the need to let her ease in slowly and Sam agrees. Sam wants to hear about anything that seems off in the slightest way, so let your security people know especially - they get around the city more than most and I need all eyes for this one."

Elizabeth paused, as though to give weight to her words. "Be very careful John - subterfuge and dishonesty is not the way to start out with a new relationship, certainly not what I would recommend. But I don't want her getting in too deep either. If you find you can't deal with it let me know. I have some distance from this and as base commander perhaps coming from me will add more weight. Remember that she's an intelligent woman and sees more than most. She'll see through you pretty quickly if you play games with her."

"Ok, so if we're done with the counselling session, perhaps I could go and get some work done."

His voice had hardened and she saw that she had angered him but that couldn't be helped. These people in Atlantis were her responsibility, under her rule and guidance and she would ensure that rules were kept as she saw fit. John chose sometimes to flout them, and she gave him more leeway than most, as she had done with Rodney who more than often had his own agenda. Gina was still an unknown quality and needed to be handled with kid gloves until they knew exactly how she would fit in here. John seemed on board with that, but Elizabeth would have preferred a more honest approach - sit her down and tell her exactly what she could and couldn't do in the city. But perhaps John knew her better than she did. His call for now, but she would certainly step in if she saw the need.

"Go Colonel, but remember what I told you. Subterfuge will only come back to bite you where it hurts. Sam wants to have a talk to her anyway - she wants to explore the family connection - her father Jacob being Gina's first cousin. I know she would like to hear about Jacob's childhood and no boundaries will be crossed in talking about the past at least. I'll make sure Sam keeps things simple with her for now and I know she will agree. They are family as well as soon to be colleagues, so Sam can teach her more than just a few simple tricks. Sam is keen to come and spend some time here in Atlantis, to take over from me for a while."

At this news John's face registered shock. "You're leaving Atlantis Elizabeth?"

"I've been thinking about it for some time now, I need to go back to earth for a while, personal business. I've had a chat with General O'Neill and it was he who suggested Sam take my place here and it will fit in quite nicely with Rodney leaving. I know Rodney had plans for Gina, but we need someone with his level of experience and he would have known that we would never rely on an unproven scientist, especially not on a base like this where decisions made often affect other planets and can have a flow on effect into our own galaxy. The IOA would never have gone for it, and while I follow Rodney's thought processes, as much as anyone is ever able to follow them, they will only accept her here in a scientific capacity if she was under the supervision of an approved scientist. Sam fits the bill for both roles. Take over as base commander and chief scientist."

"Talk about hit into left field Elizabeth! I had no idea. When will this happen?" John was stunned. He imagined that Elizabeth would be here for the duration, after all it was her doing that got them here in the first place. She was the one with the drive and determination to cut through all the red tape to make it here. It seemed wrong that she abandon it now just when things were getting interesting.

"Sam will be here next week John, and the official handover will take place then. So far, I've kept it all under wraps. Better that way, then I'll do a city annoucement before Sam comes, to smooth the way for her. She's a good commander and she'll run this place well. She might even succeed in keeping you in line."

"Good luck to her with that one Elizabeth. I do try to toe the line sometimes... but other times, I just have to go with my gut, those spidey senses that keep me in check. I trust them, and have to let them take the lead. Not so much flouting the rules as simple arrogance that my way is the best."

"Well John, with Sam being military trained, perhaps things will run a little differently. You're excused for now. Go find that lady of yours and start getting her settled into life here in Atlantis. We'll talk again.. later."

He found Ronon in the mess, seated in front of a tray piled with food, contentedly munching through the stack while engaged in a good natured debate with Major Lorne. Ronon found it hard to let his guard down enough to trust and enjoy the company of many of the Atlantis personnel, and it was good to see that he appeared to be getting on with Lorne. Rather than scaring the crap out of him. Face it, most of the personnel here were terrified of Ronon. He walked around with a brooding angry face most of the time and towered head and shoulders above the majority of personnel therefore didn't exactly open the channels of friendship.

"Ronon. Lorne. Hope what's on your plate is more edible than it looks. Seriously. I need to have a word with Elizabeth about the food here. It has gone from bad to worse." He paused, waiting for the two men to acknowledge him and asked. "Has anyone seen Gina around?"

"Thought we were tag teaming her for now..." Ronon spoke around a mouthful of green jello, the earth expression rolling off his tongue a little awkwardly and John found himself fascinated as the large spoonful wobbled precariously on the way to his mouth. But held.

Lorne raised an eyebrow at the two men. "Tag teaming her? Is there a security risk I need to know about?"

"Nah Lorne. Babysitting duties. Sheppard here wants her to stay out of trouble – at least out of Rodney's work for now – so we're tag teaming her. Keeping her busy training her and stuff." Ronon finished the jello, and after lifting an eyebrown at Lorne's one and receiving a nod, he reached across and was quickly working his way through a second one. John shuddered, wondering just where the man managed to put all that food.

"Want me to help Colonel Sheppard? I could run some weapons training, fitness testing, other basis boot camp activities. She'll be so exhausted at the end of the day that bed will be the only thing she'll manage." He too watched in fascination as Ronon worked his way through the jello.

"I don't want her too tired at night... if you know what I mean!" Ronon gave a bark of laughter and Lorne coloured slightly – not having been privy to such conversations with the Colonel before, it felt a little strange.

"I'm sure I could manage to conserve a little bit of energy. But I can certainly keep her occupied. I'm guessing this is on the sly? The lady in question is not to know what we're up to?"

"Copy that Lorne – but remember, she's certainly a smart one, so keep it on the down low. Or we're busted. Or more appropriately, I'm busted and that could likely mean pain to a certain part of my anatomy. And I'd rather like to avoid that."

"Roger that Colonel – I'll keep tabs on her and step in when I need to. Gentlemen. I'm off to finish off some much needed mission reports." Lorne left the mess and John turned to Ronon.

"So big guy – where is she?"

"The mainland. Teyla took her there."

John spat out the sip of coffee he had just taken. "The Mainland? Damn it, I wanted her to stay here in Atlantis for now."

"You didn't say anything about not leaving Atlantis. She's safe Sheppard – relax. Teyla is introducing her to the Athosians and will show her around over there. Nice and easy. They'll be back later this afternoon, then it's my turn with hand to hand training. My way."

John groaned to himself. Gina was going to be exhausted, Carson was going to be furious, and Gina if she found out what he was doing – his life would be a failed football play.

_Better not get caught then John – and if you do? Plead ignorance and smile. Generals, women, little old ladies and... dogs. _


	50. Chapter 50 A Bridge Too Far

CHAPTER 50 – A BRIDGE TOO FAR

The girls spent the better part of the afternoon at the mainland. Gina was introduced to all of the Athosians that were not out of the village hunting and gathering and enjoyed the company of the children, sitting with them for a short period to read them books, something she enjoyed greatly. When she got up to leave, she saw the disappointment on their faces and promised them that she would come back, as soon as she was able, and then she was taken by the hand by one of the younger ones and shyly she asked to be picked up. She reached down to pick up the little girl, all long dark hair and beautiful dark eyes and hugged her. She would definitely get John to bring her over here often. The children were adorable and the adults polite and welcoming and Gina left with Teyla to go back to the jumper, feeling a sense of belonging, that she had not felt since she was ripped sharply from earth and 1962.

"You miss your family Gina... it shows on your face when you look at the children. You miss that sense of belonging."

"I do Teyla. We were not a large family, and my brother had not had children yet so there were no young children in my family, but I did a lot of volunteer work at the hospital in Honolulu, and in particular on the children's ward. It was very rewarding, working with the younger children, helping them through their fears at being in a hospital, often staying there alone without their parents. Children are among the bravest of humans, don't you think?"

"They are Gina. I agree with you. They accept change and other situations far more readily than adults and often without complaint. They are more resilient than adults. Sometimes we are too set in our ways and find it hard to bend..."

Gina smiled. "You're not just talking about your people anymore are you... you're talking about John now."

"I do not wish to interfere in private business Gina, but John is my friend and he has been on his own for a long time now. He has not had a woman in his life, not in a serious manner since I have known him and this will take some time for him to adjust to. He will perhaps, be a little possessive in the beginning and I would ask that you be lenient with him."

Gina was laughing now. "Don't worry Teyla. I'm onto him – he thinks I am naïve just because I come from a different timeline – a simpler time you might say. But I had two men in my life who chose to smother me most of the time. My father and my brother – so I recognise the signs. I am also extremely clever at staying below the radar... if you get my meaning."

"I have already come to the conclusion that you are capable of taking care of yourself, but John is a man and he feels the need to look out for his woman. It is in his nature. Allow him his insecurities and trust will grow."

Impulsively she moved closer to Teyla and linked arms with her, smiling at Teyla's look of surprise. "I think we're going to become good friends Teyla. We are not so unalike, you and I. We share similar values and I'd like to think that one day you'll grow to trust me as you do John."

Gina missed the respect that quickly lit up Teyla's eyes, focusing instead on the jumper that was landing alongside the one they had come in, piloted by one of the medical personnel who needed to bring supplies to the mainland and had offered them a ride.

"Those insecurities you spoke of Teyla? I think we're about to be presented with them now..." Out of the jumper stepped Colonel John Sheppard, accompanied by Major Lorne who hung back just a little, not in total agreement of the Colonel's reasons for being here.

"Teyla. You might have asked me first whether it was suitable to take Gina to the mainland?"

Teyla didn't get time to answer. Gina calmly disengaged her arm from Teyla's and casually strode towards John, with a deceptively controlled smile on her face. Lorne watched from his point just off the Colonel's shoulder and saw the hidden demon that lurked just below the surface and thought perhaps the Colonel may just have met his match.

"Colonel Sheppard. Perhaps if you had something to say about my visit here, it would have been appropriate to address me, rather than Teyla. I am an adult and perfectly capable of answering for myself."

_Crap John – got yourself in the dog house already. Ah hell. She's pissed at you, take a look at those eyes. You get in that line of fire, you'll find yourself hung drawn and quartered and not much left at the end of it. Handled that one well, didn't you. _

He cut a sharp glance at Teyla, moved past her to take Gina's arm to move her away from the others so that they could have a private discussion. She pulled abuptly away, causing his hand to slide hard down her arm and off her wrist, adding more aggravation to the bruising from earlier and this time she cried out. John felt Lorne step forward and made him stand down with one look.

"Damnit Gina, I don't want to hurt you. Stop, so that I can talk to you."

"Talk John? Or manhandle? Because you seem to be doing a lot of that today." She held out her wrist and he saw the bruising from earlier and raked a hand through his hair, feeling Lorne's glare at his back. Likely he'd be branded all sorts of bastard by the staunch airforce major who would see taking out his anger on a woman, a very low play in his book. Hell, in John's book it took the bottom place, but twice now he had used his strength in the wrong way for the wrong reasons.

"Please. Just talk. I won't touch you, but don't walk away from me."

She allowed him to move up beside her and felt the heat of his body, close yet not touching. She didn't want to fight with him, but he needed to be on the same page as her. No watching her with suspicious eyes, no wrapping her in cotton wool in case she broke into pieces and no keeping her out of the loop. If he wanted them to be a team, a couple – then trust was imperative.

She attempted to explain that to him, saw from his eyes that he wanted that too and leaned into him. "Don't shut me out and treat me like a child. Treat me as an equal and I'll be there for you in every way. Shut me out? You'll see a side of me you wished you hadn't. Got that John?"

He dropped his head onto the top of hers, to keep her from walking away. He was afraid to take her hand again, but she did it for him, looking up only when Teyla called out that Lorne and herself would take one jumper back to Atlantis and leave the other for John and Gina to return in.

"Mummy – where are you going?" Gina turned sharply at the voice, her hand slipping out of John's. She took several steps away from him and saw a little girl, perhaps three or four years old, standing at the edge of a field about twenty meters away from them. She had long long dark hair, thick and shiny and it flickered in the breeze that had sprung up off the ocean.

"John? Do you see her?" John looked at Gina, then at the place that she stared at and thought he saw … something. A shift in the air, a hazy outline... a person? Then it was gone and Gina was running towards the spot where the little girl had stood. John had not moved, trying to process in his mind what he had seen, knowing that it meant something – but not wanting nor able – to commit an explanation as to what his mind had seen. It had looked like a little girl, and it had looked eerily like Gina, a very very young Gina. From this distance he had seem those stunning blue eyes, just like the woman who now stood on that very same spot, staring into nothing with a strange look on her face.

"Where did she go John? She was just here... did you see her? Where can she have gone? She called me Mummy.. who was she – was she lost. John!"

He appeared dazed and she spoke sharply now to get his attention. Her body was in constant movement and he needed to still her so that he could think. Her energy and motion was making his thought processes sluggish and he gripped her shoulders to still her movements, watching as a look of alarm shot into her eyes. He realised his grip was too tight and that his fingers dug cruelly into her flesh and the more she squirmed, the harder he gripped.

"John, let me go – what is wrong with you?" Her hand came up to slap his face hard, wanting to break whatever connection he had with his inner thoughts that caused him to grip her so tightly. His eyes snapped back to hers and he released her,shock in his eyes.

"We need to find her John. Whatever the hell is going on with you, pull yourself out of it. Keep your hands off me until you can get your emotions under control and your strength."

He dropped his hands, apology immediate in eyes and on his lips, her slap having had the desired effect. She didn't wait to see whether or not he followed, she simply turned and disappeared into the field, calling out for the little girl who had all but disappeared into thin air.

It took him several seconds to get himself under control and when he did he was mentally cursing himself and running after her. She had moved quickly through the field and was already into the surrounding wooded area by the time he caught up with her. She was fast, driven by something he didn't fully understand and he heard her calling urgently to the girl she had thought she had seem.

_But what did I see, _John asked himself. _There was definitely a hazy ouline of something – but a person? I didn't see a clear enough shape to resemble anything - not really. I simply saw what she wanted me to see... didn't I? Is it possible her brain connected the dots faster than mine did and imagined the rest?_

He rested a hand gently on her back when he caught up with her, standing a little disorientated near a group of trees. "I've lost her John. She must have come this way – I saw her turn and just disappear, this is the logical way she must have gone. We need to find her. If she's lost, she'll be frightened and it will be dark soon. Should we get help?"

Her eyes looked wildly around the area now which was indeed darkening with the coming twilight. John slid his hand up to her neck and rubbed lightly. "Gina – tell me exactly what you saw. I didn't get as good a look as you did. Please, exactly."

He body collapsed a little then but he didn't pull her any closer, mindful of the fact that she had wanted him to keep his distance physically for now.

"She was around three or four years old – she called me Mummy! One of the Athosian children who have become lost perhaps? There was a little girl I met earlier, about her age – but it wasn't her, I would have known her as I picked her up and carried her around for a little while. This little girl was different. John, when I looked at her – I recognised her... and I don't know how."

"Gina, this is what I suggest. We'll go the Athosian village and get them to check that all their children are accounted for. That's the first place to start. Then, if no children are missing, I think you will need to entertain the thought that perhaps you imagined her. I didn't see what you did, and we were looking at the same place. I did see something – a vague outline of something – but given everything you have gone through lately, your mind is suceptible to suggestion and it could have been playing some sort of trick on you."

She pulled away completely from his touch and looked up at him a little distrustfully now. "John, I recognise the tone of voice. Reasonable, calm, talk to the crazy lady without scaring her away. My mind is not supplying pictures it wants to see. Why would I want to see a child? I left no child behind in my previous timeline. There is no rational explanation – from a pyschological viewpoint or otherwise."

He turned away, hoping that she would follow him. "We'll go back to the village Gina, and ask around. We can't stay out here searching for something that we have no proof of."

"Proof John... you seem to require proof of everything."

"And so should you Gina. You're a scientist. Yes, you work with probabilities and theories but in the end, it all comes down to hard facts and proof. In your line of work as well as in my line of work. So don't draw this line between us. We are both trained to deal in facts and I need you to remember that right now."

She hung her head a little as he walked away knowing that he was right and feeling a little like a sulky child that had not gotten her way. Again. But damnit, she had seen that child and refused to believe that it had been put there by her mind. As a scientist she would look for the rational and this involved finding out why she had seen that child – especially if it had not really been there.


	51. Chapter 51 Different Agendas

CHAPTER 51 – DIFFERENT AGENDAS

He walked fast and she chose to slow her pace a little to allow her time to think. By the time she had reached the village he had already gathered the Athosian people together and a search to make sure that all children were accounted for was already underway.

She met one of the elders who waited for her arrival beside John. He had a kind face and did not look at her with suspicion nor distrust and for this she was grateful. He asked her calmly to describe the little girl that she had seen, and she did - carefully leaving out the information that she had called her Mummy and watched as the man shook his head.

"That sounds a little like Kayla from your description – the little girl who you were carrying around earlier? But I can assure you, she has not been out of the village area since you left and she is now tucked up in bed so it is unlikely that it was her you saw. No other children from this village fit that description – you yourself have seen the children from here. The Colonel advises that he did not see anything clearly."

She watched as a glance passed between the two men and back to her and felt as though she was being put under a microscope, with all her actions being scrutinised. She didn't know that she particularly liked that feeling and after smiling politely at the elder, she turned and headed back to the jumper, pausing first to look into direction of the field where she had seen the girl. She would come back, on her own. Soon. If there was anything to see, it was likely the girl would manifest herself to Gina alone. With that resolve, she leaned against the jumper and waited for John to return, determined to keep her plan to herself, knowing that he would likely not sanction it.

When he arrived back he flicked a concerned glance at her but she simply smiled and waited for him to open the jumper door.

"Gina? You ok? You gave in a little too quickly back there. You're certainly easier to read than War and Peace sweetheart, and I know there's something going on in that head of yours. You gonna fill me in or do I need to resort to other means to get my information?"

With that he sidled closer, and stood looking down at her letting his body heat reach out and encompass hers. She breathed in his smell, told herself she was not going to, but hell – he stood too close and as she raised her eyes to meet his amused hazel ones she could see that he knew exactly what affect his nearness was having on her. Damn the man. And when he picked up her wrist, her bruised one and brought it gently to his lips and began kissing it she felt herself lean in closer to him and slide her free hand around his neck, pulling them tightly together.

"Nothing you want to tell me... hmmm?" He murmured against her wrist, all the while looking down into those guileless blue eyes that she kept carefully shuttered against just such an intrusion.

"You'll have to do better than that Colonel Sheppard, if you wish to extract pertinent information from me. I'm not that easy. I can withstand far more... intense forms of torture before I crack."

"Really...hmmm... like this?" His hand had slid into the waist band of her trousers and straight into her warmth finding her instantly ready for his touch. She sighed, struggled to keep the knowledge from her eyes and allowed the pleasurable sensations to roll over her, then regretfully pulled away – out of his reach.

"Well let's just say Colonel, that you'll not have the opportunity to find out right now."

"We'll see about that ..." he growled as he moved past her to the control area of the ship and prepared the craft for takeoff. But her focus was out the window now, looking for the little girl who had seemed lost and frightened – a little girl who was caught between two dimensions. She had to find out what Rodney had discovered and it needed to be closed to stop such occurences. Those from one dimension could be be allowed freely to move to another. The consequences were not inconsequential as she had first thought. They could potentially become a liability.

She barely had time for breakfast the next morning, seated beside a brooding Colonel who had done his best the night before to wear her down and extract information from her – and not succeeded. She smiled to herself. Now who was the sulky child – really! Ronon appeared at their side, a slightly cheeky look in his eyes and she groaned. She knew what they were up to, it was immature and she saw though John's rather possessive and controlling nature and saw clearly that he had organised it so that she would not be alone for a single moment. He intended to make sure that she was kept busy to keep her away from Rodney's work and now he had another reason. To keep her away from the mainland. The look she sent the brooding man at her side was sharp and she noticed that he was quick to look away. Guilt? Yes. Much!

"Ok Ronon, what delights do you have in store for me this morning? Hmmm? I hope that the good Colonel here is paying you overtime for your babysitting services. Did he warn you that I am extremely good at getting what I want and even better at letting him see, only what I want him to see? Hmmm? I am sure that I can apply the same theories to you, so I hope you're on your toes, Ronon Dex of Sateda, because I am going to make sure that this is the hardest job that Colonel Sheppard has made you do yet. As penance. For treating me like a damn fool!"

Her eyes sparked as she stood and she noticed that some of the other personnel in the mess had overheard her tirade and were trying unsuccessfully to hide their smiles. Likely they were fascinated and a little pleased to see the big Satedan taken down a peg by a small woman who stood looking up at him with fisted hands placed on her hips and sparks shooting from brilliant blue eyes. John just rolled his eyes and shrugged his shoulders at Ronon. What could he say? He just hoped the big man could control her. Because he was no longer sure that he could.

Ronon glared at John as he left the mess. He would have words with his team leader later because this sure as hell wasn't what he had signed onto this mission for. But he'd do his job – take the woman and teach her how to defend herself – thought it looked as though she didn't need much help in that department.

They stood in the centre of the large rec room and Gina was not intimidated by the big man. She had learnt her lesson from Terrence O'Neill. Take no crap from no man, regardless of his size. Ronon was no different. He sought to dominate, albeit on John's instruction – but she would show him that she was not the woman he had first thought she was and as she faced him down now, in the centre of the room she saw a small measure of respect in his eyes. By the time this morning was over, she would make sure that she saw more.

"Ok Ronon let's do this. John wants me to take care of myself, defend myself. Teach me how to do that. Teach me how to stop men looking at me and acting as though I am some fragile doll that will break apart with one touch." Her eyes were sincere, she really did want to learn – but not for the reasons that she at first thought. And she did acknowledge that John's reasons were valid and necessary for life in this galaxy.

Ronon ran her through simple moves, carefully keeping his big frame from hurting her and found that she was a receptive and willing student. His respect for her shot up a notch. They had been at it for over two hours and while she was hot and sweaty, she was determined and he saw the steely glint in her eye whenever she struggled to manage one of the movements as he instructed and saw also the frustration she immediately directed at herself.

"Don't be so hard on yourself Gina. I've been doing this for years – my people are taught from an early age, to defend themselves. It is the way in this galaxy – the enemy is often at the door and we rely on only ourselves most of the time so we are taught to do just that. Come here – this movement is a hard one, but you're making it harder. Try this..."

She was pulled up hard against him and felt the steel in his body. The manoever had her extricating herself from his grip, one of his large arms was across her throat and the other banded her stomach and while she had told him to not go easy on her, right now a part of her wished that she had not said that. Her whole body ached. This past hour had intensified and he had not held himself back so much so that when she went down, she was starting to go down hard. And it was taking it's toll.

"Come on Gina – remember where I told you to place your hands. It'll be reflex for me to let you go, but you have to hit the exact spot." She let out a small groan, unbidden and he immediately lightened his hold. "You wanna stop now? You're tired and you'll make mistakes soon. You've done good. We can do some more tomorrow."

Gina was aware that John had come into the room and was lounging against one wall. His eyes raked over her and had taken in her disheveled look and the tired posture of her body. Hell, Ronon had pushed her hard, but wasn't that what he wanted? Maybe, but not like this. She was just a little thing and still recovering from a head injury. He groaned. Idiot, he told himself. You don't think straight where she's concerned. Damn idiot. He pushed away from the wall, intent on breaking this up now and letting her rest – hell maybe getting her checked out by Carson. He certainly didn't need the scotsman on his case about mistreatment of his woman. Hell no.

He heard a grunt and a cry of pain and hastened his movements seeing that Gina was down on her back and not getting up immediately. Ronon had dropped to one knee beside her and glared at John as he moved in closer.

"She's all right Sheppard. Just winded. Damn it Gina, you lost concentration that time, let me take you down. You forgot everything I taught you about that move. If that had been a real battle situation you would be dead, a stun blast would have finished you off while you lay there." He offered a hand down and when she didn't take it he placed one hand around her chin to turn her face towards him. "Talk to me Gina. Are you hurt?"

She groaned. "My pride Ronon – just give me a minute to get my breath back and tell my body that yes, it still is in one piece. More or less." She rolled to her side groaning. "Ah crap... maybe not. Ronon – can we cheat a little next time and use mats. I don't think there's any part of me that doesn't have a bruise – of some sort."

Ronon helped her up and waited until she got her balance before letting her go. He picked up a couple of towels and tossing one to her, he went to leave but paused briefly. "You did good today Gina." and watched as a small smile lit her face. He could see what the Colonel saw in her. She was a tough one and a good person. His heart thawed a little as he let her in. Trust. A hard commodity for him to give up.

John stood close behind her and she felt soft fingers begin a gentle massage against her neck. She groaned and he moved closer. "Teyla has special herbal creams for bruising. Used them myself a few times... I'd be more than happy to take care of applying some cream... to your bruising...hmmm?"

In spite of her pain and her tiredness she laughed. "John – you think with one part of your anatomy and I'm guessing that's because the food here is so bad that getting to a man through his stomach is really not an issue here..."

"Yeah well... kinda hard to think with much else sometimes when I'm around you. It sort of has a mind of it's own."

"It certainly does John... fortunately, we're generally on the same wavelength, so perhaps I can be persuaded to allow you to...apply cream to bruised areas and perhaps a small afternoon nap wouldn't go amiss..." He softened his touch and brought his head down to nuzzle her neck and smiled.

"Your wish is my command...my lady."

"Good – because after that, I would like to go back to the mainland – no objections, no arguments. That is my wish. Got that Colonel John Sheppard."

And he saw the soft look in her eyes turn to steel and groaned. He had a monster on his hands. All soft sensual woman who melted at his touch, who could turn instantly into a hard soldier of fortune. But damned if that wasn't just a little bit sexy... and he would distract her for now with other things... and perhaps she would forget all about her little request...


	52. Chapter 52 Searching for Answers

CHAPTER 52 – SEARCHING FOR ANSWERS

He did manage to distract her for a short time and Teyla's cream was... therapeutic to say the least. But when he left her with a kiss to organise his security teams for an upcoming mission offworld, she escaped, tracking down Carson and combining her quick visit with him into a check up to make sure that there were no after effects from her head injury and to convince him to take a little trip that afternoon.

He saw the bruising on her body and winced. "It looks as though you have been on the wrong side of Ronon's hand to hand combat training... those look painful."

"Ah,not too bad Carson – really. They look worse than they feel..."

He tried to hide a smile. He had caught a whiff of the cream that Teyla used to help bruising and knew that many of the personnel had resorted to it's use, finding it did indeed manage to soothe bruising. He also suspected that someone other than herself had applied it as some of those bruises were in rather hard to reach places.

"Why do you want me to fly you to the mainland lass? Does the Colonel know about this little request of yours? I would imagine he doesn't otherwise he would be the one to fly you." Carson's eyes held a hint of humour. He knew how the Colonel could be and had been on the wrong side of his temper more than once and it took a brave person to stand up to him. Gina seemed to have more than just a hint of that necessary streak.

She filled him in a little on why she wanted to go – preferred that if he was going to get into trouble for taking her, at least he had more or less the facts and not some prefabricated story. He looked skeptical as she knew he would. He was a man of science also, and dealt in facts and proof – a theory about a little girl who may have slipped through a dimensional portal did not bear any weight with him, but he sensed in her the importance to find out this same thing for herself, so he agreed to take her. And possibly face the wrath of the Colonel. Fortunately he did have some supplies to take to the mainland and there were patients there whom he could check up on. It would certainly not be a wasted trip on his behalf.

"I have to admit lass, I'm concerned at your approach to this and Rodney's work and I have to agree with the Colonel. You'd be best to steer clear of the whole thing. Word is that Samantha Carter is taking over his research and she's due here in Atlantis early next week. Hand it over to her lass, she's had the experience in working with this airy fairy form of science. Leave her with the headache. I know there is plenty of proper science here in Atlantis that could certainly do with your tender touch. Right here in my lab in fact? I could find some research for you to do, things I have been putting off as I just don't have the time or resources to assign anyone to them."

Carson gave her a smile and without waiting for a reply he took her arm and ushered her out of the infirmary, heading down to the jumper bay.

She took Angel with her this time, knowing that the little dog needed a good run and the wide open fields around the Athosian settlement would provide a wonderful area for her to do just that. Carson flew, being a bearer of the ATA gene, he was one of the designated pilots in the city and she sat comfortably in the second chair, Angel on her lap. Carson cast slightly troubled glances at her from time to time. He was concerned for her, felt the pressure that she was putting on herself was too much and would likely come to a hard and perhaps somewhat nasty head later on.

Carson left her to attend to his own business and smiling at Angel's excited barking, feeling the more natural ground under her paws for the first time since leaving earth. She bounded off, all doggy excitement,nose to the ground, tail wagging and Gina followed along behind, heading in the direction where she had seen the little girl yesterday. There was no one else around, at least that she could see and for this she was grateful, free to do her own investigating without having to explain herself to someone else. She moved deeper into the wooded area that surrounded the fields, just as she had done yesterday and Angel ran on ahead, content to follow smells of animals her doggy sense seemed to recognise even though they would have been different to the squirrels and chipmunks that she had enjoyed chasing on earth. The woods were dark, and just a little eerie and she shivered in the cold, where the sun did not manage to penetrate. And wished that John were here with her.

What began as unease in her stomach rapidly escalated until spasms of pain began to clutch at her stomach and she had to stop and wrap her arms around it, as though to hold the pain in one place. She bent slightly, taking deep breaths, wondering if she had eaten something the night before that had upset it. The spasms were accompanied by sudden nausea and she dropped to her knees, now taking deep breaths and frantically thinking back to what she might have eaten to bring on this upset.

Reaching up a hand to wipe the sweat that had begun to dampen her forehead,she groaned,and saw the outline of something in front of her, something that shimmered then took solid form. A little girl. With long dark hair and impossibly blue eyes. She blinked and the form began to shimmer again,disappeared. Gina, attempting to push away the pain, reached out a hand and called.

"Please. I won't hurt you. Do you need help?"

She heard Angel barking and the little dog came crashing through the undergrowth,alerted to the sound of her mistress' voice, and the unease she heard in it. Pushing her wet nose into Gina's hand she turned and caught the scent of something that obviously scared her because she began growling and moved forward towards something that Gina could not see.

"Angel, come back. Be careful." She clutched her stomach, painful spasms giving little relief and tried to push herself to her feet, to follow Angel. She heard barking, then yelping and terrified now for her dog, she pushed faster through the bushes. The little girl stood there, close to the dog and was bending, holding her paw in her hand. Angel had gotten her paw caught in something and trying to tug it out had caught it further, causing her to yelp in pain.

"Who are you?" The girl continued to hold the dog's paw and looked up and the woman.

"Mummy? I've been waiting for you to come back. Where have you been?" The girl was older than she first thought. Small for her age, Gina put her at around five years old, possibly six.

"Are you lost? Do you want me to show you how to get home?" Curious now, and trying to control the pain in her stomach, she reached out to the little girl, gently touching the long dark hair that felt like silk beneath her fingers.

"I am home - I live just over there..." she turned and pointed beyond the trees at something that Gina could not see. "But you had gone and I was getting scared. I came to see when you were coming back."

"Sweetheart, I think you're confused. I am not your mother. I may look like her, but she is... someone else. When did you last see her?"

Tears began to form in the girls eyes. "A long time ago. Something happened and she left and never came back. I saw you yesterday - you look like her. I wanted you to be her."

"Oh baby..." pushing her pain aside, she took a deep breath and reached out for the little girl, folding her into her arms and holding her tight. She felt the little girl begin to sob and stood there for a long time letting her cry and rocking her gently. It had been a long time since this little girl had felt the touch of a mother and it felt right. Standing here with her in her arms, offering comfort and something more. Love.

Gina's stomach spasmed again and this time she could not stand with the pain. Keeping hold of the girl, she sank to her knees and bent so that her head nearly touched her knees and the little girl disentangled herself from Gina in alarm.

"Please, I think I need help. Can you go into the village and find the man who came with me. Find Carson. Please. Take Angel with you, she'll guide you there and back."

The girl backed away, afraid now, wanting to help this woman who looked so much like her mother. She turned and ran, Angel following behind and Gina rolled into a small ball holding her stomach tightly, listening to the sounds of their running growing fainter and fainter.

She must have passed out briefly. The sounds were back, louder this time, sounding as thought something significantly larger moved through the undergrowth. "Gina? Where are you, love?"

Carson. She breathed a sigh of relief. The little girl had found him and managed to bring him back.

"Here, Carson.." Speaking was a struggle but Angel heard her and bounded up immediately pushing her wet nose into Gina's face, then licking her all over bringing a smile to her face. Carson was on the ground beside her immediately, gently pushing the dog aside and rolling Gina onto her back.

"Where does it hurt, love?" His eyes dropped immediately to her stomach and the way she cradled it and saw the sheen of sweat on her forehead. Gently he removed her hands and replaced them with his own, pushing and palpating, causing her to cry out.

"I'm sorry, but I need to do this. Is there nausea, or just pain?"

"Both, but mainly the sharp pains. I think it was the mess food..."

He found a smile for her and pushed her damp hair back from her forehead. He looked around then,for the little girl who had led him here and looked back at Gina puzzled. "She's gone. Do you know where she came from?"

"I have a suspicion Carson..." her breathing changed as another spasm shook her and Carson cradled her against him now, waiting for it to pass. When it did, he rummaged in his medical bag that he had brought with him and brought out a hypodermic needle.

"I'm going to give you something for the pain lass, otherwise we'll never get you back to the jumper. This will work fairly quickly and you'll get drowsy so you'll have to put up with me carrying you I'm afraid. You were telling me about the girl?" He attempted to distract her while he readied the injection and rolled her to enable him to place it in her upper thigh.

"Those dimensial portals that Rodney was so cagey about. I'm thinking she's from another dimension Carson. The Athosians don't know who she is, and she told me I look exactly like her mother... the one who has been missing for a long time..." Her voice already had taken on a drowsy edge and Carson packed his things away and balancing both her and his bag, he lifted her into his arms and headed back to the jumper with Angel following. And churning over the concept that there was a little girl running lost around this forest looking for her mother. From another dimension.


	53. Chapter 53 Real or Not?

CHAPTER 53 – REAL OR NOT?

Carson radioed Atlantis on route from the mainland and an impatient Colonel was waiting in the jumper bay when they arrived back. Carson almost wished that they had come in under the radar when he saw the anger that shot through the Colonel's eyes. He had made it clear that he had not wanted her to go and this blatant disregard of his wishes was fuel to the smouldering embers he had managed to keep banked down. Until now.

"Colonel, now is not the time for theatrics. I need to get her to the infirmary and find out what's causing this pain. If you want to make yourself useful, there's a little girl in the forest on the mainland who is wandering around, apparently lost - Gina muttered something about her looking for her mother." He watched as John's face paled a little at this news and knew that it would distract him from the other. "I would suggest taking a jumper over there and having a good look for her. Gina will be worried once this painkiller wears off and she becomes lucid again. She told me that when you went yesterday, she was the only one to see her. Just for the record Colonel, she presented herself to me quite clearly today - was the one who ran and got me when Gina was in trouble. Then just disappeared - so if you could take care of that, then I can get on with my job of making sure your lady is going to be fine."

He watched the Colonel's face drain of it's anger a little as he scrubbed a hand tiredly over his face. He moved over to the gurney that had met them in the jumper bay and placed a hand softly on Gina's cheek, stopping once again to pick up Angel under one arm.

"John?" Her voice was slurred. The pain killer had her in it's grasp and she barely registered him. "Find the girl, please. I never asked her name. Find out her name. Take Angel with you, she'll find her... ok?"

"Hush sweetheart. Just rest. I'll take Ronon and Teyla with me and we'll see if we can find her." His hand continued to soothe and in his arms, Angel began to squirm a little, wanting to get down and be with her mistress.

"Carson saw her..." her voiced got quieter and John realised that her eyes were shut and she was asleep. He didn't know what to make of her comment nor that fact that Carson had obviously seen the girl and was not simply humouring Gina to get the Colonel out of his way. He stood for a few moments watching as Carson wheeled her away, and activated his radio to get Ronon and Teyla to the jumper room. He would go and look for this girl although he had his doubts that she actually existed. Mass hysteria perhaps, Gina had managed to convince Carson that she was there. Or, there really was a girl, and she had become lost - perhaps a nomadic group that had visited the mainland at some time. A far stretch, he knew. But it was better than the alternative. He had made it clear to Gina that he did not want her looking into the dimensional work that Rodney had been doing, and so far it had simply found her.

_Ripples_ thought John... _what is her true purpose for being brought back here. Just when I think the picture begins to clear and sharpen, another layer of the image is thrown down and it becomes indistinct again. Just like the little girl I am supposed to find._

Ronon, Teyla and John stood near the field where Gina had first seen the little girl. Ronon was impatient, feeling as though they were chasing ghosts. Teyla, more in tune with the less tangible understood that what Gina saw may not have taken full human form and this may be a result of a number of reasons. Her people had many beliefs about the afterlife and spirits and her first thought was that this little girl had recently died and needed to cross over. This would make her visible to only certain people, those that were particularly sensitive in those areas.

They spread out and John let Angel take the lead, which she did happily. She headed straight for the place where Carson had found Gina collapsed and calling Ronon to meet him there, he asked him to verify the tracks that he could see and the direction they led. Ronon took his time with this. Most disconcerting, was the fact that he found clear tracks that did appear to belong to a small human, although there was no proof that they belonged to the girl that Gina had spoken of. Ronon, looking pensive, stood and followed the tracks and stopped in front of a large tree where they simply disappeared.

"Did she climb the tree Ronon?" John looked upward. The tree was a large one with thick branches, making it an easy task for a child especially, to pull themselves up and hide amongst the thick foliage in the upper branches.

"There'd be markings on the bark Sheppard, signs that she had pulled herself up. There's nothing here. Not human anyway. Plenty of animals had taken shelter in this particular tree, but a little girl? It would not seem likely given the lack of tracks."

"Then where the hell did she vanish to?" John huffed an impatient breath, wanting to get back to Atlantis to see how Gina was. Not chasing a girl who to him, was not real.

"John..look!' Teyla had stilled and placed a hand on his arm to quieten him. He followed the direction she had turned in and saw her. Beautiful with long dark hair and large blue eyes. Gina's eyes. He gasped out loud, and the girl started and looked as though she would run.

"Hey sweetheart... it's ok. Don't run. Gina sent us to find you. The lady? The one who was hurt? You helped her, remember, went to find the Doctor so that he could take her away to make sure she got better?"

"The lady that looks like my mummy? Will she come back. I'm lonely... and scared." Her voice trembled and John moved closer, putting out a hand as though to calm an animal about to run.

"Would you like to come with us? We can take you to see her... she misses you too I think." He stopped when he saw the coiled energy in her young body and wondered at how long she had been alone for.

She allowed him to get close enough to her to reach out and touch her face gently. He crouched down so that he was at eye level with her, and looked into the lovely blue eyes that reminded him so much of Gina. Who was this little girl and how had she come to be here – alone? She stared back at him, unafraid now and smiled.

"Are you my Daddy? He went away and never came back. Just like my Mummy. But I don't remember what he looked like. I just remember my Mummy." He little chin trembled as tears filled her eyes and his heart went out to her. Gently he held out his arms and let her step into them, then he simply lifted her, cradling her against him and raising his eyebrows at both Teyla and Ronon, he indicated that they would take her with them.

"She is real John – I think you owe Gina an apology. You were very hard on her and had her almost believing that she had imagined this little girl. I think this is a lesson for you – be more accepting of things that you do not immediately understand as being obvious. Some things are never obvious, and it is these things that often hide the greatest joy."

John managed to look abashed at what Teyla said. She was right. He had been quick to judge and dismiss and Gina had every right to be angry with him. Holding the little girl tightly against him, they moved through the field, making sure that Angel was following and when they came within sight of the jumper, she became agitated.

"It's ok sweetheart. This is a jumper, a ship – it will fly us back to the city we have come from. There's nothing to be scared of, you'll be able to look out the window and see the water and before you know it, we'll be back with Gina. We need to travel on this ship to see her. Ok?"

She struggled a little more and John quickly got them into the ship, closing the doors and transferring her to Teyla's lap so that he could fly the ship. Teyla's soft voice seemed to sooth her a little and she sat back, hiding her face against Teyla's shirt, too scared to look out of the window. John, after casting several glances her way, flew as quickly as he could to Atlantis, radioing the city when they were a few minutes out. He needed to give them a heads up that he was bringing a visitor with them.


	54. Chapter 54 Revelations

CHAPTER 54 – REVELATIONS

Carson didn't have to run many tests before he had solved Gina's little dilemma. It became quickly obvious that the mess food could not be held responsible for her stomach pains and when Carson sat beside her on the bed with a serious face, Gina had a sinking feeling. She was, however, not prepared for the news that he gave her.

"Pregnant? Carson... are you sure? I mean, it's not as though we haven't... you know...but... pregnant? Funny how some things just don't cross your mind. So busy thinking of other seemingly more important things – the bigger picture? I guess this really is the big picture!"

"How do you feel about it lass? Having this sprung on you on top of everything else you've learned in the last month. This is life changing news, to say the least and brings all sorts of thoughts to mind. A mother of the past and a father of the future... what does that make the child?" Carson laid a hand gently on her stomach, now calm as the painkiller still held the cramps at bay. Carson had assured her that cramps were not a more ominous sign that she was losing the baby. Sometimes early pregnancy brought severe symtons,and he had run through several tests and was happy that the baby was fit and well. The mother was worn out and needed rest, but all things considered, her health was good.

"What does that make the child, Carson? I'd say it makes the child the reason you were brought here – to this time line. Because of your lineage and the fact that you do not carry the ancient gene, it was determined necessary to bond yourself to a man who carried a strong version of the gene. It would have been researched until it was deemed that Colonel Sheppard was the best candidate. And the ancients did the rest."

The voice came from the doorway and startled, Gina looked sharply at the woman who had spoken. Colonel Samantha Carter. Smiling at her now, even though she had imparted knowledge that effectively told Gina her whole meeting with John had been set from the very beginning, had been orchestrated and played out perfectly to ensure the lineage of her child was as it should be.

"I'm sorry Gina – I could have found a more subtle way to impart that knowledge, but where the ancients are concerned? Let's just say that subtlety is not something they do well. I take it John doesn't know yet?"

Gina was silent for a moment, not sure how she felt about the news she had just heard. Definitely she felt manipulated and wondered briefly if their feelings for one another were genuine, or had that been forced. She knew one thing. She did not know if she could trust any of her feelings from here on in – she would never know whether they were in fact hers to feel, or at the request of a higher power,

She pushed out of the bed, feeling woozy at the painkiller that still clouded her system, and wobbled slightly as she went to move away from the bed.

"Easy does is Gina – you need to lie back down. That was a strong medication I gave you and you can't be wandering around with that in your system."

"I need to get out of here Carson. I need to think about things. Sam? He doesn't know yet and I'd appreciate it if you could keep this news to yourself for now. I will tell him when I have had time to process it all myself. At the moment? I want to be happy for this news..." She touched her stomach gently as she said this. "But I feel a little betrayed and I need to come to terms with that before I can share this with anyone else. Please respect that, and make sure that John doesn't hear this before I am ready to tell him."

"Gina. Let me go with you. I need to talk to you – there are some things I want to say, and perhaps after you've heard them, you'll feel differently about what's going on. I won't say anything to John, you have my word. But don't leave it too long. He's an astute man, and he'll pick it up on his own before long." Sam moved into the middle of the infirmary and gripped Gina's arm to steady her, giving Carson a look, letting him know that she would take care of the younger girl.

The walked out to one of the piers and the fresh air was like a balm to the nausea that had been rolling through Gina. She breathed deeply and watched as Sam smiled. "You've got a little more colour in your cheeks now Gina. I'm sure Carson's already told you this, but you've got to take care of yourself from here on in. Two of you now, and that little one? He or she will be relying on you to make sure it all works out ok."

"I thought you weren't coming until next week?" Gina continued to breathe deeply. It seemed to help with the nausea.

"I needed to talk to you – had a feeling that things were spiralling out of control a little bit here. You know I'm going to take over as base commander?"

Gina shook her head.

"Elizabeth needs to stand down for personal reasons, and for the same reasons, I needed to be here with you. I also want to continue working on Rodney's project. I know that John is against this project and has managed to convince himself that it is a waste of time – worthless research. That's not like him – he's generally more open to different theories and if it's got the word gadget in it's name, he's the first one playing with it. He knows that something's going to come through that will cause us problems – he senses that and like the proverbial ostrich – figures that if he denies all knowledge of it's existence, then it can't be real. You and I both know that it can have very real implications in this dimension, if something comes through from another."

Gina had been silent up until now. "You're talking about a security risk, aren't you Sam?"

"I am Gina. And for now, we have to treat that security risk as though it is the enemy. I want to find where any or all of the rifts are, and seal them up. For good. I understand – as I know you do, that they are meant to stay sealed. Rodney had other ideas – he would have chosen to sensationalise them, and make them accessible. He couldn't be allowed to proceed with that notion. You and I Gina. We need to seal them."

Gina nodded, watching as a jumper flew over the water toward them, coming in low from the mainland. John and Ronon with Teyla. She remembered that they had gone there looking for the little girl who had helped to get her back to Atlantis. She turned sharply to Sam now.

"There's a little girl on the mainland that has been appearing to me. I think she is from another dimension, one similar to ours. I think she is my daughter in that dimension, but I died and now she crosses between the two dimensions, looking for her mother. John, Teyla and Ronon have gone to the mainland to find her. We have to help her Sam – we can't just send her back to a dimension where she is obviously alone and frightened."

"That certainly complicates things Gina, and we'll have to deal with that when or if they find her. For now, I want you to take care of yourself and your baby, and I hope you find a time to tell John that he is going to be a father. I think he will be a natural!"

"Sam...?"

Gina had started walking back into the city, and now paused.

"What it it Gina?"

"Why did you and I miss out on the ancient gene? Your grandmother is an ascended being as is my father – yet neither of us have the gene. Why? Everything else seems to be by design."

Sam gently pulled on her arm to propel her forward. "I think we were meant for certain people. Two genes together are two strong – two positives make a negative? You were meant for John and I was meant for Jack. Both of those men have the strongest ancient genes found yet in modern day humans. Tested ones, anyone. That would be my theory."

They entered the city and headed towards the control room and Gina caught sight of John and his team coming down from the jumper bay. John held a little girl in his arms and Gina's breath hitched. The little girl from the mainland. From another dimension. Her daughter.

John's eyes held hers across the room and the little girl turned her head to see what he was looking at and her eyes widened when she saw Gina. Struggling to get down from John's arms she called out urgently.

"Mummy...!" and as soon as he put her down she ran towards Gina, throwing her arms around her legs. John followed a little more slowly, waiting until she had hoisted the little girl into her own arms. He ran a hand over first Gina's hair,then the little girl, then touched his forehead to hers briefly.

"Meet Carlie. Our daughter. Kinda. Ahhh crap..."


	55. Chapter 55 A Little Girl in Need

CHAPTER 55 – A LITTLE GIRL IN NEED

Gina's startled eyes met John's ones over the head of the little girl. He had found her and brought her back. Their daughter? Hope, and something else surged through her... love. She had felt bonded immediately to this girl when she had met her, knew that she was in trouble and needed their help.

"Hey Carlie... I didn't get a change to say thank you for earlier... you found Carson and brought him to me. That was very brave of you."

The little girl tipped her head back and looked shyly into Gina's eyes. "Where is Angel?"

The little dog was never far from Gina and had been sniffing around outside on the pier after following Gina and Sam outside for their little talk. At the sound of her name she gave a small bark and came trotting in, sitting at Gina's feet and looking up expectantly. Gina slid Carlie down until she was standing beside Angel and she immediately dropped down beside the dog and put her arms around her.

"What animal is this? I have never seen one like this before?"

John had crouched down beside Carlie and the dog and rested a hand possessively on her long dark hair. "That's a dog. Where we come from, these are companions, friends – for people." He named an animal from this galaxy that they were similar to, but it was a difficult comparison because pets were not kept in the Pegasus galaxy. Animals were either eaten, or simply roamed.

"John? Is it safe for her to be so far from the rift? Will there be people looking for her?" Gina was concerned that they were interfering in something they knew nothing about.

Elizabeth had joined them and she looked around the group of people that had gathered. Scientists, soldiers, hunters and gathers. People from this galaxy and another. Together in this one point in time, standing here around one constant. A little girl who had supposedly come through a dimensional portal. From another dimension, whose life there may have mirrored the life she would have had here. Or not. The implications were staggering and while the others focused on the girl and her needs, she exchanged a glance with Sam. And knew that Sam saw the bigger picture as she did. Why did this little girl come through? And why did she find her 'mother and father' _here_ when they quite easily could have been in their own galaxy.

Elizabeth felt a cold shiver ran down her spine as she felt that unpleasant feeling of things escalating out of control once again. Ripples... those time ripples had not just been affected here in Atlantis – they had succeeded in pushing their small shock waves through to another dimension. This little girl – _here and now_ – she had the uncanny thought that if John hadn't gone back to earth fifty years in the past, then this child would still have her own mother and father in her own dimension. She had been sent through to this one for a reason. Always a reason... and with a look to Sam, managed to convey one thing to her. _This is on your shoulders now Sam. I'm out of my depth – you'll be the one to hold this group of people together and make sure that they make decisions that affect people for the right reasons, not the wrong ones. I did my best, but this is beyond my pay grade. Time for the big guns._

Sam nodded at her in silent agreement. Elizabeth had done her best and she sensed the tiredness in the other woman. Hell, this was beyond most of them, but Sam was fresher and brought a different way of thinking to the mix. Hopefully she'd keep them all from self destruct. Looking out at this assembled group now she gave a mental shudder. That was going to be a tall order.

Carlie had run off a little way to play with Angel and Gina took the opportunity to straighten up and look at Sam.

"What do we do with her Sam? Looks like all eyes are on you for this one. We can't send her back – we don't know what's on the other side for her. Given how lonely and scared she has looked each time she has appeared to me, I would imagine that she has no one there to care for her. I'm also not so naïve enough that I realise that she may simply have run away and perhaps there are people looking for her that are genuinely worried about her. Being unable to get _there_ – we have no idea and can only go by what she says and our own gut feelings. And mine is saying _she needs us._ And I think we need her."

Sams's glance sharpened as she said this and John swung his own gaze broodingly to hers. He had been watching Carlie run down the hallway with Angel.

"I know you feel a connection with her Gina – and finding out that another version of you was her mother... that must bring about all sorts of incomprehensible feelings. And hell – she's just a baby. It's hard to send someone like that back to something that you have no concept of. That would be cruel. But we have to be careful Gina..." John had picked up her hand and pulled her slightly so that she was touching against his side. Again needing that contact. "If you allow yourself to get too attached to her, and we find that she's here for reasons that are considered a security risk, we can't compromise the lives of people on this base. You know what I'm saying, don't you?"

Gina looked up at him. "You refused to consider the dimensional issue when I tried to bring it up with you before. Kept pushing the idea away. Refuting it. Now you accept? It took a little girl to walk out of a forest and call you Daddy. Look to that for your answer John. You brought her here – if you had felt that strongly about it you would never have let her leave the mainland. You would have found a way to keep her there, monitored and protected. Instead you chose to bring her back to Atlantis. What does that tell you?"

She pulled away from him when he didn't answer right away and she saw that the attention of everyone else in this group was on him. Waiting for his answer.

"Do you believe that another dimension can exist or not John? Because if you don't, if you continue to refute that, then we're all going to be working at cross purposes here. Because how else could you explain the presence of that child.?"

He ran a hand through his hair and turned again to look at her. "I don't know Gina. I only know that I brought her back because she was small, lost and afraid. No man with any sense of humanity would leave a child alone, like that – regardless of where or when she came from. Lets leave it at that. I don't want to consider anything more sinister right now. Ok?"

It was Sam who murmured quietly. "You're going to have to pull your head out of the sand pretty quickly John – there is a very real chance that this may be the catalyst for something more – a security risk. If you don't open your mind now to consider these implications, it's possible that you'll be behind the eight ball later on if something does happen."

"Damnit Sam – look at her! She's just a child!"

"Just a child John. Do I need to remind you about that mission in Afghanistan. Where they used a little girl with a doll on a street corner. A doll that was filled with explosives. She was just a child. Children are used in many ways for many things and while we will never understand the depth of depravity that would allow such a thing – we cannot refute that it does happen. And I would be remiss if I did not give this serious thought. When Elizabeth steps down, I will be responsible for the lives of all the men and women on this base and I will need to make decisions that I may find abhorrent, but they will be for the right reasons. I need to know you have our backs when it comes to base security, John. That is paramount. Yes, she is just a little girl and I hope that these nasty suspicions are just that – but my request to you all? Stay on your toes and be extremely vigilant – for anything that appears out of place or just plain wrong."

Elizabeth gave a small smile. "You should have saved that speech for when I introduced you as new base commander. If we'd done that over the city wide announcement, we could have killed two birds with one stone. I think now, is a good time for me to step down. You've effectively declared your intentions and I'm ready to go. The ship is yours Sam... guide her through the storm that could be about to hit. You're a damn fine pilot and this city needs the best at it's helm."

The two woman looked at each other as something passed between them. The command of this city. The respect of these people. Legacy. And the fate of a little girl who had come through from another dimension.


	56. Chapter 56 Attachments

CHAPTER 56 – ATTACHMENTS

Gina decided that she had had enough of base politics and knowing that Carlie needed a full medical workup before she would be allowed any sort of access to the city, she called Angel back to her, knowing that Carlie would immediately follow. Shooting a glance at the others, she ignored good manners that would dictate she excuse herself from this impromptu gathering, and simply left, taking Carlie and Angel with her.

John stared after her broodingly then turned his gaze to Sam. "Anything I need to know? You guys looked like you were getting into some deep and meaningful conversation when we rocked up."

"Just covering some history John, family connections – and other personal stuff. If you want to know more, I'm not the one to break a girl's confidence. I need to arrange a base meeting to do the official handover – most of the personnel here know who I am but I want a formal introduction done and I want to give people some clear idea as to what has been happening here – from the time that John stepped through that time portal. I know you have chosen Elizabeth, to leave much unsaid at this stage, and I understand your reasons for doing that. But I want to start this command on the right foot, and that is with all personnel completely in the loop as to what has been happening. It will also give me the chance to make sure that everyone is fully aware and watching out for anomalies."

"You're sure you won't promote mass panic Sam?" Elizabeth had a hint of reservation in her eyes, not fully on board with Sam's announcement.

"If something like this panics them, then they're not the sort of personnel we need in Atlantis. This is a frontier, and needs to be treated as such. It is the front line back to earth and we have the responsibility to make sure that nothing puts our world at risk. This can only happen if all personnel are aware of the risks – all of them."

John nodded. "I agree with you there Sam. Forewarned is certainly forearmed."

"I'd like you by my side when I make my announcement John."

"No problems Sam – I've got your back. Just as I had Elizabeth's." He turned then, intent of heading to the infirmary. He knew that Gina would have taken Carlie there – knew base protocol. Wanted also to talk to Carson about Gina's health situation. In the light of all that had happened – that little ommission now seemed glaringly obvious.

Gina had taken Carlie to the infirmary and the little girl had shyly given Carson a hug, remembering him from earlier that day. He had lifted her onto the bed and showed her all the instruments and machines that he would be using to make sure that she was in good health. She was unafraid, had instantly connected with his kind manner and funny accent and he in turn, was already under her spell.

Gina stood back and let him take the lead, wanting Carlie to look to him, not her. Carson found no health issues. He determined that she had been fed well with sufficient nutients and vitamins and was not lacking in any essential body requirements. While small, her growth still appeared normal for her age, bone density and white blood cells were all in the normal range, motor skills exceptional and some simple mental function tests showed that she had a good degree of intelligence. Scans showed nothing lurking inside her.

When he was finished Carson indicated with lifted eyebrows that he wanted her to approach the bed.

"She's a healthy wee lass Gina – at least as far as I can tell. I'm comfortable with her being on base and not spreading any contagions. Now lass, about your little condition..."

Gina threw a sharp look in his direction as John walked in. "What little conditon doc – in the excitement of finding Carlie here, I overlooked one of the reasons we had had to go back to the mainland – your stomach pains Gina? They're gone? That mess food finally get the better of someone, or is there something else Carson? What sort of tests did you do?"

"Calm down Colonel. I ran all the required tests and I doubt the food had any real effect – stress levels have been high and we still don't know the effect that the time travel has had on her. We'll wait and see – she's still got enough pain killer in her system to keep the worst of the pain away, but I'm thinking by the look on her face that it's starting to wear off...hmmm?"

Gina had begun to pale again and John was beside her in a second. "Why didn't you say something Gina? Talk to me – talk to Carson. Trying to handle this yourself is not the way to go. It looks like we have another to look out for now..." gently he rested his hand on Carlie's head and Gina had to hide a smile. _Another.. and another... who would get the biggest shock. _

She had decided not to say anything for now. Carlie needed their time and attention and she didn't want anything distracting them from being there for her. Until they worked out what was going to happen to her, Gina would keep her little secret to herself for now. And hoped that Sam or Carson would not inadvertantly give it away.

"John, leave Carlie here with me if you have business to attend to. We'll find a book to read and I'm thinking, this young lady could be ready for a little nap sometime soon. It's been quite a day, hasn't it sweetheart?"

John helped Carlie onto the bed where she snuggled in beside Gina, two dark matching heads side by side and John felt his breath hitch a little. Anybody could see they were mother and daughter - but in another dimension? Hell, in this dimension - she was here now and that is all that mattered. The other? Sam was right. He didn't want to think about it right now. Carson rummaged around in a box he kept in the infirmary for days when the Athosians brought children across for treatment and found a couple of childrens books which he gave to Gina.

"This way I can get you to rest, so Carlie - I need your help in keeping this lady in bed for a little while - ok?" Solemnly the little girl nodded at him and John, after giving the two girls a last look, and an even more telling glance at Carson, left the infirmary. With the distinct impression that he was being kept out of the loop about something.

While Gina read to Carlie, John went to see Kate Heitmeyer. He wanted to get her advice on getting the little girl to talk about what had happened to her and felt that someone qualified should be the one to do it. He had run it past Sam and Elizabeth first and they had both been in agreement. Whatever had happened to her, be it in this dimension or in another, had had a traumatic effect on her, and the more they had to work with, the more they could get done from this end. John thought Gina may disagree about taking her to Kate, but he would get around that one when the time arose.

"Give me some background John. I sense you're keeping something back from me."

He sat across from Kate in her office and her eyes looked searchingly into his. "Gina and Sam both believe she has come through a dimensional portal of some sort. That while she is from this time, and that we can only guess as being correct - she is not from this dimension."

"I also sense John, that you disbelieve this?"

"Hey Kate... this is not my session... don't try and analyse me - ok?"

Kate smiled. "You fall into the trap too easily John, make yourself an easy target. Most of the relevant information I get, will be from that which you try not to tell me."

"And you wonder why I refuse to come and see you - professionally?"

"Aaah John... you need to learn to trust me. I'm on your side. Anyway - we're not talking about you - remember. And if you choose to withhold information about the girl, then how do you expect me to give you any sort of answers. Bring her in to see me, let me talk to her - I don't have that much experience working with children, particularly those that have internalised traumas, but I'll do my best. How does Gina feel about this? She's the one that seems to have the strongest connection with the child."

"Haven't exactly brought it up yet..."

"John! You walk a fine line - if you want Gina to trust you, you need to be open in how you deal with her. It seems that in the short time you have known her most of the relationship has been shrouded in some form of distrust or subterfuge. Trust – John!"

"And I thought this session wasn't about me.." his voice was sulky now and Kate couldn't resist a smile.

"Call it a freebie - take the advise I give you. If we were back on earth, this would be costing you a fortune."

"If we were back on earth I wouldn't have these damn issues!"

"Yeah... you have a point there... I have another patient waiting John, so I'm kicking you out of this unofficial session. Bring the girl to see me tomorrow, preferably with Gina so that she has someone she feels she can trust with her."

When John went back to the infirmary later that afternoon he found Carlie and Gina sound asleep, Carlie tucked tightly into her side with her small arms wrapped around Gina. They looked like they belonged together, and he knew that if anyone tried to separate Gina from this little girl, she would fight them tooth and nail. John hoped that he wouldn't have to be the one to do it. He might have questioned whether she belonged here in Atlantis and until they had ascertained that she was not a security threat, she would be treated with kid gloves - but seeing her alongside Gina now, he did not question their bond. Hell, in the short time he himself had spent with the girl, there was a definite pull of something... he didn't know what but the thought entered his head that if they had to send her back, Gina wouldn't be the only one to suffer.

Gina opened her eyes sensing his presence in the infirmary and John saw that her face was still pale and saw the pain that still clouded her eyes. He put a finger to his lips and she looked down at Carlie curled up beside her and smiled. He came around to the other side of the bed and pulled her head gently against the side of his body, bending his head to drop a kiss onto her forehead.

"You feeling any better?" he whispered.

"It'll pass John. The rest helped a little, and being off my feet - not something I'd normally admit. The pain meds are wearing off but I prefer not to have anymore. I want to get out of here - do you fancy springing us out?"

"That'll depend on whether Carson's on board. Feel up to eating yet?" He saw the grimace that crossed her face and smiled. "I'll take that as a no... but I'm sure young Carlie is, so how about I take her down to the mess and rustle up some food for the two of us and let you get a little more rest. We'll see about springing you after that. Hmm?" He looked down at Carlie who now gazed up at him with large solemn blue eyes.

"Hungry, sweetheart?"

She nodded and he held out his arms, smiling as she came into them naturally and giving Gina a wink, he carried her out of the infirmary. Gina watched them go with a frown on her face, one that Carson did not miss. "You haven't told him yet, have you?"

"Not the time Carson. We need to deal with Carlie first - she's our priority."

"You have another priority as well now Gina. One that is going to be hard to follow unless you get your Colonel on board. Taking care of yourself, not putting yourself into dangerous situations..."

"You really think that John will allow me to go into a dangerous situation, pregnant or otherwise? Not the best example Carson..." He smiled at that, she had him there.

She groaned suddenly as a pain shot through her stomach. "Ah crap Carson.. that was short lived..." She wrapped her arms around her stomach and hunched forward slightly and Carson laid a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Let me know if you change your mind about taking something for the pain. Most of the medications I can recommend are safe during pregnancy and you know I'd never risk your baby with something I wasn't sure of."

"I suspect this little person in here is a little confused as to what timeline it belongs to. Pulled in two directions. Poor wee thing - not a good start to life, eh?"

John came back to the infirmary later that evening. He had taken Carlie to feed her, and managed to find a not too violent DVD to watch with her, then after a shower he had put her down in his private quarters to sleep - unsure as to where else to put her. He had brought in a folding cot and arranged it not too far from his bed. He had sat with her and told her stories until she had fallen asleep and then leaving a light on in case she woke up while he was out, he went back to the infirmary after giving Teyla instruction to check on her as often as she was able.

Gina's pains had begun to ease and she was involved in a discussion with Sam when he entered, which fell ominously silent the moment he walked in. Suspicion blooming he looked from one to the other.

"You ladies make me nervous. And not in a good way. Give!"

"What ladies talk about when men aren't around - let's just say you are not going to be privy to those conversations." Sam said it lightly and got up to leave and John saw that Gina had been in the process of leaving also.

"So, am I springing you outta here?"

"Yep! Carson said I'm good to go. Things seem to have settled down and I think I'll go and try to eat something. Much as that mess food makes me want to throw up again... Major Lorne called in a little while ago and I'm scheduled for weapons training tomorrow. That should be a blast. I used to do target shooting with my brother a few years ago and haven't picked up a weapon in a while, and he promised to be gentle!" Flicking a smile in Carson's direction and a wave she turned to leave. "How's Carlie? You got her to sleep ok I take it?"

"Out like a light, poor thing was exhausted. I've set up an appointment with Kate Heitmeyer for tomorrow - she'd like you to be there with her."

John watched Gina's face harden slightly and felt himself tense up in response. He had been dreading this conversation but mindful of Kate's admonishment regarding honesty and being upfront, he decided to just put it out there. And likely suffer the consequences.

"Subjecting her to interogation is a little harsh, even for a military man John. Don't you think?"

John pulled on her arm gently to get her to stop. "It's not interogation Gina - we need to find out what happened to her, both for her own sake and ours. I am head of security on this base and until I know she is not a security risk, we need to take precautions. I need you to understand and respect that - even if you don't agree with it. This is my job and if I compromise this base safety in any way, then I am not doing that job."

She was silent after that and did not speak again until they got to the mess. She went for the coffee, figured her stomach would perhaps hold that one down at least and thought briefly about how she would have to cut down on her cafeine intake.. soon. The only other item that looked as though it would stay down at the moment was the jello and to John's amusement she took two of them.

"Ok, so a sweet tooth...hmmm?" He nudged her with his shoulder and looked down at her smiling, wanting to get her somewhere alone so that he could do some of the things to her that he had been longing to do all day. Then remembered guiltily that she had been, and was in all likelihood still, unwell. Hope flickered when she took his hand at the table and held it to her cheek, and hope continued to simmer when she agreed to go and watch a movie that was playing in the rec room after checking that Carlie was still asleep. And it built to a hot flame when she curled up beside him in one of the chairs and he felt her hand rest lightly on his inner thigh, likely in all innocence, but sending heat racing up to his groin. So much so that he barely registered what was playing on the screen. And was at bonfire level when her hand began a gentle stroking and looking down into her eyes saw immediately that innocence was not in question here.

"You're a witch..." he murmured quietly into her ear. "And right now? I want you so much that I don't know if I can make it to my room."

Feeling just a little bit naughty she kept up her gentle foreplay until the others watching the movie left, casting amused glances at the pair that remained. While Gina had been more than discreet in her attentions, John's somewhat hot and bothered look had not been. When they were alone, he was on her in seconds, had her laughing and breathless, his own hand now seeking retaliation for the torture she had put him through.

"Not here John..."

"Damn it - I don't think I'll make it to my room."

She pulled him up and led him quickly out of the rec room and into a supply closet in the same hallway. Feeling a little like a naughty school girl she allowed the door to shut automaticallly after them and in the darkness he heard her giggle and his hands did not need light to find their way. He had her shirt open in seconds and was taking a nipple into his mouth to suckle it hard, bringing a sharp groan to her lips,half pleasure, half pain - and she threaded her hands through his hair to hold him in place, feeling weak and boneless at the onslaught. He was moving down her stomach before she had time to recover and her pants pooled gently at her feet followed by her panties and he was sliding his fingers into her moist centre, then she felt the hot slather of his tongue as it stroked and excited her to a fast peak.

"Aaah hell John..."

"Like that...hmm?"

"Yeah..."

His hands now moved behind her to run lightly up her spine and she gripped him firmly, causing him to take a sharp breath. Her hands kneaded gently until he was so hard he thought that he would surely burst and he had to grip her wrist, but lightly, to still her touch for a moment. She laughed and fumbled at his waistband, soon freeing him so that she could slide her hand up and down his length and dropping to her knees she took him in her mouth, scraping her tongue lightly on the underside until she felt him tremble.

Impatient now, he lifted her until he could slide smoothly inside her and walked them forward towards the shelving full of … something that felt vaguely like linen. Laughing a little now, he rested her bottom against the shelf, then laughter turned to something more as he stroked in and out of her with a relentless rhythm that had her gasping and gripping his shoulders, falling off the cliff, moments before her did.

His head dropped onto her shoulder and kissed her soft skin, feeling the tremors still moving through her and she pulled him closer so that she could wrap her arms around him, holding him close inside and out. Listening to him breathing against her shoulder, she wished that she could draw this moment out for a long moment in time.. one that she could always come back to if things became too much. Here in this dark room, she felt safe in the arms of her Colonel, feeling his slick skin under her hands and his breath on her shoulder. Bonded.


	57. Chapter 57 Answers Within Her Mind

CHAPTER 57 – FINDING ANSWERS WITHIN HER MIND

She held him throughout the night, feeling the warmth of his body infuse itself into her. She had felt cold when they had returned to his room, checking in on Carlie who appeared to be sleeping deeply, and as soon as they had slipped into bed, she had slid up against him, causing him to murmur something sleepily. She let him sleep, he was exhausted and perhaps feeling a little peace for the first time in a long while, but wound herself tightly around him, legs tangled in his and sighed. The cold slowly seeped away and she knew that it had more to do with tangible cold. It was something deep inside her, she had felt it at the same time as the stomach pains and nausea and wondered if it was something to do with her pregnancy, or a more sinister reason.

Part way through the night a little body climbed into bed with them and pushed herself between them, causing a sleepy John to open one eye and smile, seeing the dark hair and blue eyes of Carlie, as she snuggled between them, and looked shyly up at him.

"Scared sweetheart?"

"Cold... cold inside..."

He stilled at this comment. It was an unusual one for someone so young to make and looking down into her eyes he asked quietly.

"Do you feel sick Carlie?"

"Not sick... cold, inside."

He gave himself a mental shake, likely the words had another meaning and he was seeing a more chilling conoctation. When he looked down again, he saw that Gina was also awake and her hand was softly stroking Carlie's face.

"Does it feel like ice melting in your stomach Carlie?" He watched as the little girl nodded, then shot his gaze down to Gina, raising an eyebrow at her.

"Gina? Something I need to know?"

"I felt it too John, when we arrived back here last night. Cold inside, like fingers of ice prickling, then melting. Hard to explain, but it feels like you can't warm up. Funny that we both share the same experience, the same feeling... what does it mean?"

"Hell Gina, I don't now what any of this means. I think the two of you need to talk to Kate tomorrow, and I think perhaps Sam needs to be there as well. She's got a good head that woman, but she thinks outside the box, and much as I hate to admit this, that's the only sort of thinking that's going to work here. I'm struggling sweetheart, and I'm a little scared. Too many unknowns, and now I've got two people I care about and I'm scared I'm going to lose them."

She felt his pain and reached out now to stroke his cheek, just as she had done with Carlie. Carlie she noticed had fallen back asleep and it felt nice to have her small body pushed up between them. It felt right, and without thought she touched her other hand to her stomach, then quickly removed it before John noticed. She needed time to tell him, more time. They needed to find Carlie's story and make peace with that before she added another mystery into the mix.

"Go to sleep John. We'll sort it out, I promise – and I for one aren't going anywhere. And we can only hope the same is true for Carlie. I've grown attached to her in such a short time – I know this is wrong and I can't help myself. There is a connection there, and I'm terrified too, that if it gets broken, what happens to us. Somehow John, the three of us are bound together. Brought together for a reason. To be a family for a start, then something else..."

"Gina...?" John's voice was soft now, not wanting to wake Carlie.

"Hmmm?" She was getting sleepy and had to force herself to answer him. Sleep claimed her though and she missed his reply.

"I think I've fallen in love with you..." and he smiled as he heard her breathing deepen. _Ok then, so the earth did not shatter when I made that announcement, and the world did not end. Love? Wow, sprung that one on yourself Sheppard, didn't you..._

The morning brought normal – more or less. Cold feelings gone, smiles and a little bit more food staying down than previously. So yeah, more or less normal. He walked them to Kate's office and they met Sam there. John had asked if he could be present as well and Gina felt some trepidation at this, worried that something would come out that she was not ready to air yet. But could not think of a reasonable explanation as to why he should not be there. Carlie seemed to trust him and be comfortable with him and that enabled her to make the decision. What would be, would be.

Sam and John kept to the background, simply there as observers during this session. Sam particularly wanted to try and make the connection with the dimensional issue. She was resolved now, in working through Rodney's research and felt more strongly than ever, that the portal if indeed it did exist, needed to be closed. But not before they found out Carlie's story and whether she would be able to exist as a fully functioning person in this particular dimension – without their being implications in either one.

Kate talked a little while with Carlie, working to make her feel comfortable in her presence and easing out some of the information that was stored on the surface. They learnt that wherever Carlie came from, mirrored Atlantis – more or less. John and Sam shared a look. It appeared that another field trip to the mainland would be needed, and they would have to take Carlie with them to find where she was getting through. As indeed it was rapidly becoming something that was no longer a theory, it looked as though it was a probability.

John murmured to Sam, deliberately keeping his voice pitched low so that the other three females on the other side of the room would not hear him.

"What do you think of her answers Sam? Something seems a little off to me – it's almost as though she says them by rote... or am I being paranoid?"

"You're right John. The answers are a little too neat and tidy. As though they are sitting there catalogued in her mind ready to be accessed at the right time. That does not seem consistent with how a six year old would impart information. At least, a six year old from earth, anyway. It could be that her mind works a little differently. But like you, I am picking up something."

She signalled to Kate now and the woman understood at once. They had a prearranged signal. If Sam felt that they weren't getting the answers they needed, then Kate was to try hypnosis. It seemed a kinder way to attempt to extract the information, especially if it had been buried deeply. This was less instrusive to the person trying to retrieve the memory as they could be pulled out quickly and easier if they showed signs of distress. Gina looked up sharply, seeing the interaction between Kate and the two who kept their distance on the other side of the room and did not appreciate being left out of the loop.

"John?" She turned to look at him, and raised her eyebrow questioningly. He wanted to look away at what he saw in her eyes, but made himself walk over to her and lay a hand on her shoulder.

"We want to try hypnosis. There's something there, and it's buried. We need to be able to access it, and hypnosis gives us a safe platform to do that. Kate?"

"He's right Gina. I'm trained in this, so can make it simple and painless for Carlie – and of course you'll be right there with her if she does show signs of any distress. I can pull her out in seconds if need by. Ok?"

Gina looked down at the little girl and saw the innocence in the blue eyes, then without warning the cold fingers clutched painfully at her stomach and she bent forward, gasping for breath, seeing Carlie mirror her actions slightly as though she felt the tendrils herself.

"Gina, honey?" John dropped down beside her and forced her head up, needing to see her face. "The same pains as yesterday?"

She nodded. "With that same cold I felt last night. Inside. Just like Carlie. What's going on? Carlie? You feel it too... do you know what it is?"

The little girl looked back at her with large blue eyes, eyes so like her own and involuntarily she shivered, reaching for John's hand to clutch it tightly for a few moments, before letting it go.

"Carlie? You'd tell me if you knew what it was? Wouldn't you?" Carlie said nothing, but her eyes shifted slightly away from Gina leaving her with the feeling that something else had entered the little girl and she was not the same person they found yesterday. Something had changed inside her. She felt John stiffen beside her and wondered if he had sensed it also.

"Kate? Go ahead with the hypnosis. Carlie, sweetheart? I'll be right here beside you – if you feel scared in any way, squeeze my hand tight and we'll get you out – ok?"

John prowled restlessly around the room while Kate took her under and watched as Gina held her stomach. He worried about whatever was happening with her and acknowledged that the pains had begun from the time that she met the girl for the first time. He needed to monitor her carefully and if he saw that things were worsening he would have to get her away from Carlie – as hard as that would be for the two of them. He couldn't have Gina's health deteriotating because of something that reacted with Carlie and he would protect her whether she wanted him to or not.

Kate took her through a series of base questions to establish the depth of her functionality under the hynosis. Her answers were clear and still appeared stilted and with a glance at John, Kate took her under deeper, much deeper than she would normally a child that young. A safeguard had been set up in this child's mind – this much had become obvious and Kate needed to know just how deeply that safeguard had been buried.

Carlie immediately showed agitation at this depth and her small body began to convulse slightly. Gina became alarmed and started to push up from the couch, but John moved beside her and put hands gently onto her shoulders, anchoring her there. He dropped down beside her and murmured into her ear. "Sshh, it's ok. She's not in pain, she's resisting whatever has been implanted in her. I think she wants to tell us but someone or something has already given her clear instructions. We need to get past those walls that they have put up to protect the knowledge."

"Who John? Who would do that?" He had pulled her back against him and cradled her now, his own hands resting on her stomach and she felt a moments panic, as if he had sensed the new life there.

"Whoever is in charge of where she came from. I think she has been sent here Gina – to meet you, and to meet me. Perhaps she has a message for us, perhaps they want us for another reason – whatever it is, they've used her to get to us."

Kate probed deeper and at last sensed a crack in the walls, but she also saw that she was beginning to cause the little girl some pain. Gina pushed away from John now.

"Enough! That's enough – both of you. Can't you see what you're doing to her? You're crazy! You talk about something controlling her, sending her here with an agenda. She's just a little girl. She means us no harm – damnit, she lost her parents. Maybe we are all she has left."

Sam stepped forward seeing that John was losing control of her and needing the session to continue. "Gina, you need to calm down or I'll have to ask you to leave. If there's a chance she is holding this base at risk, we need to know. You're too close to her now, and you refuse to see that there could be a negative side to all this. That is exactly the thinking I can't allow. I know she's a little girl – but ask John about a mission that went horribly wrong in Afghanistan. She was just a little girl too – and killed several soldiers because she had been programmed to do just that. Children are used all the time in battle – it is horrible and cruel but it is a fact of life. If you're going to live here – in the Pegasus galaxy, you need to toughen up and see that not all people are good. There is a lot of bad out there, and here, the same as anywhere else, you'll see it in spades. And in the least likely places."

"I won't sit here and watch you do that to a child. Damn it, I won't!" If she could have taken Carlie with her she would have, but it would have been dangerous to remove her while still under hypnosis, so for now she trusted that they would bring her out, but she refused to stay in the room with them any longer. "Do your stupid experiment, but if you hurt that child in any way, I will not forgive any of you."

She slapped John's restraining hands away and tears now running down her cheeks she ran out of the room and headlong into Major Lorne who had come looking for her, intent of starting his end of the bargain – weapons training.

"Hey, Gina... slow down. What's wrong?"

"Using a child, that's what's wrong. Accusing others of doing the same thing that they are. Hell, I want to hit something right now. If you put a gun into my hand right now Major Lorne, I don't think anyone on this base will be particularly safe."

"Hey, calm down. Let's walk a little and you can tell me what's got you so fired up. We'll not put a weapon into your hand until you're a little calmer I think..."

He steered her away down the hallway, tossing a look over his shoulder as he saw the Colonel come to the door of Kate's office and stare broodingly after them. And wondered just what had been going on in there. He suspected it was something to do with the girl they had brought back. The city had been buzzing with the news, especially as it appeared that no one knew where she had come from, and even some rumours that she was not from this dimension – whatever the hell that meant! Lorne was a military man and thought in black and white, not shades of gray, so such a thing didn't seem likely. But something had gone down in that room and Gina was upset so he did his best to get her away from the situation and the angry face of the Colonel who she obviously needed some distance from right now.


	58. Chapter 58 What Side of the Battlelines?

CHAPTER 58 – ON WHAT SIDE OF THE BATTLE LINES?

John watched as Lorne led her away, glad that she had someone with her... Lorne, not so much. He had seen by the look his junior officer had given him that he did not agree with his handling of this woman and did not want to draw battle lines with this one. Lorne did not know the full story and was the sort that would fight any battle on behalf of an aggrieved woman – that was his knight in shining armour nature. Good in some ways as it meant Gina was in good hands, bad in others. Sheppard would need to have a talk with the Major.

He returned to the room where Kate continued to probe Carlie's mind. He wasn't immune to the distress he saw on ers face, even if Gina had accused him of just that. Hell, this was just a little girl and he had already begun to form some sort of bond with her. But he was able to step back just a little and see the bigger picture. There was something buried deep in her mind, and it was this missing information that was causing him concern. Using a child was a capital offence in his eyes, and if he found proof that this had been done, then he would go after those people with murder on his mind. But they had to find out what was in her mind. Step one. Step two? Try and soften the blow when he extricated Gina from Lorne's hands. It was not shaping up to be a good day. No sirree.

His reflexes kicked in when Carlie arched off the couch and he caught her in his arms, trying to take some of the pressure from her small body. He felt like the worst sort of child abuser. Gina had no idea what this was doing to him, or the two women in the room. Sam had to turn away at the pain she saw in his eyes. Some decisions were not the easiest to make.

"We're getting deeper John, Sam. This is new territory for me and I have to admit, I'm not comfortable going this far with an adult. But a child? It doesn't seem right. But I'll finish what we started and I'll plant something in there that allows her no memories of what we have just done to her. I won't have her look at me like a monster when she comes out." Kate ran a hand over her face and John saw the toll this was taking on her as well. It appeared they would all walk about with scars of some sort from this one.

"It hurts!" Her terrified voice made John squeeze his eyes shut and hold her tightly against him, the only thing he could do to help her.

"I know sweetheart, and I'm so sorry for doing this to you. I wish there was another way. We think some bad people put something nasty inside you, something that would hurt the people here in Atlantis. We just need to find what it is."

"They want Gina. They want my mother!" She screamed the words now and John's eyes opened in shock and he pulled back slightly from her to look down into wide blue eyes that did not comprehend.

"Why Carlie? Why do they want her?"

Her eyes were unfocused and at least there didn't seem to be pain in them anymore and for that he was grateful. She spoke, and her voice was unemotional, and seemed far older than that of a six year old. He did not see the little girl anymore, something else was driving her now.

"They want the child. It will have the knowledge they need and the gene which is missing from our lineage. In our world."

John shook his head in consternation, aware that Sam had moved closer and was standing right behind him now. "I don't understand Carlie. From the beginning, you need to tell us everything."

"I don't know everything. They only allowed me so much knowledge. I am still just a child in my life, but what I told you was true. My mother and father are both gone. I was taken into care by a team of medical people who are conducting experiments on some of our people. We are all being trained to perform certain tasks. My task was to bring back Gina. They knew when she arrived, they had been waiting for a shift in the portal that would signify that someone of the required genetic makeup would arrive. But it is not Gina they want. They want her child. Your child." She looked at John when she said this and he reached out absently to stroke her hair back from her face.

"We don't have a child Carlie.. not yet anyway."

Carlies's eyes shuttered briefly as she attempted to push back whatever was controlling her. "You will John, one day. It will be a child of two time lines from your world, and more than that – it is the lineage of an ascended being. We do not have the ancient gene in my world. It has been bred out and the people in power seek to introduce it again. But they want only the strongest to continue this lineage. The child of an ascended being bonded to a strong carrier of the ancient gene – the child from this union will have genetic memory of two time lines and much more."

John looked into her eyes and felt reality blossom out of control and was glad that Gina was not in the room to hear this. To see the voice of a six year speak of things that she should have had no understanding of. He wished himself, that they had never found her. Never heard what the people from her dimension, her world wanted to do.

"How do you get through to this world Carlie. You understand don't you, that we have to protect ourselves, close off this doorway. Permanently. There's a reason why our two people should not mix."

Sam had taken over the questioning, seeing that John was having trouble processing what the little girl had imparted.

"There are two such doorways. One here in your city – but this is a small one and a person cannot fit through. Only small objects. We have tried but not been able to widen it. The one on your mainland is the only active one that we can use. At the moment it is small – an adult sized person would struggle to get through it."

"Which is why they chose to train a child... bastards!" John ground this last one out, angered beyond belief and wanting desperately to hit out at something, anything. His hand curled into a fist and he turned and lowered his head against the back of the couch, needing to calm himself before he spoke again.

"John, please... don't be angry. I did what I was trained to do, but when I met Carlie and you... it is not clear to me anymore. She is my mother in my world, or was... before she left. I don't remember my father, but I feel a connection with you, so perhaps... you were my father. That much is the truth. When I saw you again, standing near the field... I remembered and wished desperately that I didn't have to go back. That I could just stay here with you. I had decided... that I wouldn't do what they asked me to do. Wouldn't bring Gina back."

"Damn it Sam – I don't know what to do? Carlie – why is it you can speak the way you do? My mind is spinning in circles. How old are you really?"

"I am just as you see me. But the experiments that they performed? My particular one included advanced mental acuity. Extremely advanced. Our world and yours are almost the same in most respects. Many of the same people are there. There are some differences... in advances, in technology. Some good, some bad. We appear to live a more simple lifestyle but it is similar in advancement to here. The missing ancient gene is the one thing that drives them at the moment and they have been trying unsuccessfully to manufacture it artificially. They are not bad people, really – when Gina came through … their plans changed and they started to do things for the wrong reasons. Greed."

"Ahh, mankind is the same in any dimension then. Sam? What do we do? You're effectively commander here now, this is your call. How do we close that portal, so that they stay on their side and continue doing whatever the hell it is they do over there?"

"That John, is as far as Rodney got. Perhaps, buried in Rodney's notes, is the information required for me to get further into the dimensional research. I'll pick up his notes and get back into it, but I want Gina's help. She has more insight into this than you realise, likely something passed down inadvertantly from her father and other members of her family. I think we need to get our heads together, and finish what Rodney started."

"How did he know Sam? How did he know it would be a security risk? Because in the end, even after his own arrogance asserted itself in wanting to exist in two dimensions – he began to understand, didn't it? That two dimensions needed to be kept separate for a reason?"

"I have a theory about that one John. He found some notes that an ancient had left behind and chosen not to store in the data base for central collection, but had kept in a lab that Rodney frequented. It had been about the dimensional portals and this particular ancient had encountered one of the people from the other side – his own counterpart. He had not liked what he saw and after speaking to him at great length, the two of them had agreed that the dimensional portal must never be allowed to be kept open. It was potentially dangerous. There is instruction and the semblance of ideas in the ancient's notes, but it appears he was interupted before he could even make sufficient headway. Rodney had begun by playing around with it really, as a sort of hobby – but he had begun to notice certain things... the missing objects … and this had led him to believe that if it were to open fully, there was the possibility that base security could be compromised."

"Why the hell didn't he tell us this as soon as he discovered it?" John had pushed himself off the couch now, his head was aching and he had no desire to attempt to process any further information.

"Arrogance John, simple arrogance. He thought he could work it all out himself and present us with a complete package of what went wrong, and the correct way to fix it. Rodney was about arrogance more often than not – and in this case, he has shown irresponsibility in not passing on what he had discovered. We now have a potentially dangerous situation, one that perhaps, could have been avoided had we known about it earlier."

John turned back to Kate who had been looking at them all expectantly. "Bring her out Kate, gently. She's to have no knowledge of what we just discussed. The experiments they did on her – obviously that super intelligence is hidden away and can only be accessed as we did, or through another means that they work with. For all intents and purposes, if she is not 'accessed', then she is exactly as we see her – a six year old year who has lost her parents. Who, incidentally, in her world, were Gina and likely myself."

"Quite a conundrum John, and a messy one at that. I'll bring her out and she should be exactly as she was before she went in. I may push those memories down a little deeper, so it is even harder to access them, in case they are triggered remotely from wherever she comes from."

"And just for the record Sam?" John waited until she had turned her blue eyes toward him. "She's not going back. I'll fight tooth and nail to keep her here – for myself, for her, and for Gina. That's the least we can do for her. Give her the life she should have had. With us."

"I can't promise anything John. This is a big one and I need to bring in some advice in the form of a General... get my drift? I can't make this call on my own. I'll get more than my hand slapped. But Jack's a good man, and he's seen a lot in his career, so I think I know how to get around him on this one. But she'll need to be constantly monitored to make sure that those memories of hers stay firmed pushed down, because if they were to come to the surface, we don't know really, what her mandate is. She may be required to get Gina there under any circumstances, and if those memories flip their switches by remote... Gina will be in danger whenever she is around her. And I'm sure you don't want that..."

John shook his head, trapped now between a rock and a hard place. And that other bit of information that was swirling dangerously around in his head. _Another child... for Gina and I... _


	59. Chapter 59 Demons to Purge

CHAPTER 59 – DEMONS TO PURGE

Major Lorne took her away, holding her firmly by the arm and he simply let her rant. That appeared to be what she needed. He didn't understand much of what she said, and wondered if she herself had full comprehension. Most of it way too mind boggling and to his simple military order, things like this just did not happen. Pegasus galaxy or otherwise.

By the time they got down to the area that they had set up for weapons training and target practice, she was a little calmer and he could allow her instruction on weapons. She had indicated that she was familiar with the older style handguns, trained in their basic use by her brother and father, but the more modern ones in use today were a mystery to her, and Lorne picked up a Beretta 90, thinking that it's weight and size would be a perfect weapon for her to take offworld, once she was cleared for such missions.

He carefully showed her how to pull it apart and put it back together again, a necessary part of knowing how the weapon worked and how to use it. She was a quick study and if he noticed her silence now, in the wake of the ranting she had indulged in just previously, he chose not to comment. She had to fight her battles the way she saw fit.

He flicked her quick glances, watching as the concentration on her face calmed her inner turmoil. Watching as her small quick hands were fast to master the loading and reloading of the weapon, and watched as she took a firm posture to line up the weapon. He moved in behind her, and with a gentle touch, aligned her body slightly to centre her better, then followed down her arms to allow for the weapon to be angled in a position that would allow her to sight it more accurately. He attempted to depersonalise the feel of her body as he stood close and whenever he brushed up against her, he pushed down the somewhat inappropriate feelings that were making themselves known. Tried to imagine she was just another cadet he was training. And failed. _Crap, _thought Lorne, _ not a good time to get feelings about someone else's woman... considering who has claim to her. Way to go Lorne. Your timing sucks, really._

He pushed the unwelcome thoughts away and concentrated on giving clear instruction. She was a natural and quick learner and was firing clean shots down to all targets within the hour. She stood back, dropping her arms from their two handed grip and looked tired. He took the weapon from her, checked to make sure the safety was off and put it aside, looking at her in concern now.

"You've not said much this past hour Gina. Worked through some of that crap that's been building up in your mind?" He attempted levity to get her to talk, wanting to see at least a glimmer of a smile. She was too quiet and too serious and mentally wanted to give the Colonel a good shake and maybe more. He had certainly been instrumental in bringing her to this state.

"Thanks Major... really. This has been more than a little medicinal I think – and you have been great. Calm and accepting without pushing too hard. Thank you..." She stepped toward him now, feeling suddenly exhausted and it was natural for him to bring up his arms and fold them around her, drawing her in closer. Knew that it was not a great idea, from his point of view, but argued with himself that he was an adult, and could separate the feelings he found growing for her, from compassion and understanding, which she obviously now needed. _There, not so hard, was it?_ He asked himself. _Just hold her like that, she's a woman, yeah... and one you're obviously developing some not so appropriate feelings for, but she could be your friend, if you let her. And maybe you'll just have to settle for that... yeah... _

He smiled to himself against her hair, glad that the voice inside was heard only by him, or she'd be running as fast as she could in the other direction about now. He could be her friend, no problem – and that was certainly what she needed right now. Someone to hold her and let her know that he was on her side, and wouldn't judge. He knew that she had likely had enough of the judgemental by now and needed acceptance.

"Glad to be of assistance Gina. Consider me a friend – you ever need to talk, or just hang out... I'll be there for you, just radio me, or whatever. You need someone on your side around here, and I guess I'm looking to fill that role."

Over her shoulder Lorne saw that John had come out onto to pier where they did their weapons training and he had the little girl with him. He saw the way the Colonel's eyes narrowed at the way Lorne was holding his woman, knew also that he wouldn't make a public deal about it in front of the girl or Gina. That would come later, in private. Lorne knew that the Colonel would be paying him a private visit in the very near future and he would be given clear warning. Hands off his woman. _Well Colonel – game on! I've more than my share of respect for you as a soldier and a leader – hell, I'd follow you to hell and back in battle. But you're screwing this one up, big time. She's a good woman, and you blow it Colonel? I'll be there to pick up the pieces and you'll not have another chance._

Gina must have sensed him, because she pulled out of Lorne's arms and turned to face John and Carlie. Lorne's hand slipped down to rest lightly on her hip and he had to forcibly tell himself to remove it. It was one command that he had difficulty following.

As John and Carlie neared, Gina dropped down onto one knee to allow Carlie to run into her arms. Over Carlie's head Gina looked up at John, censure in her eyes as well as an unspoken question.

"Don't worry Gina, she remembers nothing. Nothing of what we pulled out. And believe me sweetheart, we found the holy grail, the whole story. In black and white, and once you hear it, you'll see exactly why all this has to be treated as a security risk. You too Lorne – I'm calling a meeting for all military and security personnel – ASAP. I everybody clear on exactly what is going down. You'll be briefed along with the security people Gina and for now, we need to keep Carlie away from the two portals. I've organised a small roster of people to take care of her for a little while so that we can get things sorted out from this end."

He abruptly turned, not wanting to go into things any deeper with her. Gina stood up, keeping the little girl at her side and her own body stiffened. Lorne saw it immediately and knew the reason for it. The Colonel had just blown it again.

"I'll be briefed? Do you even hear yourself John? I'm not one of your security team – we're supposed to be together, a team, my partner... at least I thought that was the direction things were moving in. You treat me like one of your security, someone who needs to be briefed?"

John stopped, and turned back to her. "This is exactly why you need to be briefed. I cannot have you getting emotional and creating a scene every time things don't go the way you planned them to. This has clearly become a military situation, and once you get the full story, you'll see why. I can't have you indulging in theatrics and storming out every time something doesn't go your way."

Lorne closed his eyes. _So not the way to handle this Colonel. You've been alone too long. This is your woman, there will be theatrics, she will show emotion, she's not one of your damn soldiers. _He saw her posture tense and debated stepping forward to try and diffuse things a little, but he had done that once already, and that had already gotten him into a puddle of something unpleasant. Time to walk away for now and let them try and sort things out.

"Come on Carlie – let's go get some food – I don't know about you honey, but I'm starved... and I think the Colonel and Gina here need to have a little private talk..." Lorne reached for the little girl's hand and trustingly, she took it and he led her away. Tensing his shoulders for the explosion he knew was sure to follow.

She didn't disappoint, simply whirled to face John, anger written across her face and depicted in every nuance of her body movements.

"How dare you speak to me like that – as though I mean nothing to you. If you wanted to have a relationship with a soldier – then feel free. Go. I will think with emotion, and I will react with it. If you can't deal with it, then sod off. I don't need you John, neither of us do. We'll get along just fine..."

His eyes narrowed. "We...?"

"Carlie and I. Let me know when this damn debrief is. I'll be there all right and I'll have a few things to say, you can count on that."

She whirled away then, furious for the way that he had made her feel, and furious with herself for letting his actions get to her. She had been around her father and brother all her life, she knew that emotions were kept in check in military situations... but hell, she was not part of his military world, and she had given her own family the same lecture over the years. Leave the soldier on the base. When you come home, bring the man. _But the man is the soldier, and the soldier is the man..._ A part of her told herself she was being unreasonable, that her actions had caused him to censure his own emotions, if for no other reason, than get the job done as efficiently as possible. She knew that this was not easy on him and to deal with her emotions on top of his? Perhaps she demanded too much.

He watched the expressions hurl like fireworks across her face – hot and uncontrolled and sighed. This was who she was. Passionate, fiery and emotional. Why did he try and compartmentalise her as something she was not? Why did he compare her to someone like Sam who was trained to push all emotion aside to deal with problems in a calm and level headed way.

Sam wasn't the one he had fallen in love with. Gina was. And he wasn't about to let her walk away. Not now, and not ever.

"I'm sorry..."

They spoke at the same time, each come to the same conclusion. Bend or be broken.

Then she was in his arms and he held on as though his life depended on it, because hell, maybe it did. His mouth slid over her jaw and found her lips, hot and needy and he took what he wanted and gave her what she needed.

"Sit down sweetheart... I've a long story to tell you... I'll tell you everything now so you'll have time to process it all before you see Carlie again. And if you need to hit out at something, and believe me, when you hear what I have to tell you – you will, then I'm here for you. In any capacity you need me to be. Lover, friend, punching bag... whatever you need sweetheart..."

And he told her everything that they had learnt and when he was finished, he simply held her in his arms as she cried. That was all she asked.


	60. Chapter 60 The Big Guns Arrive

CHAPTER 60 – THE BIG GUNS ARRIVE

General O'Neill strode like an angry bear through the stargate and planted his feet solidly on the floor of the Atlantis gateroom.

"Sheppard! Just what the hell is going on in your part of the universe. You've lost our chief scientist to another timeline and I get _this_ sent to me..." Jack rattled a large newspaper clipping and thrust it unceremoniously at John, who barely had time to open it out before the General was ranting again.

"And now I hear that you are holding a young child from another dimension who has some sort of ticking time bomb inside her that will likely explode if she doesn't take Gina back to her dimension? Does that about cover the highlights...hmm?"

John mentally shuddered. It had been two days since they had learnt under hypnosis the true implications of Carlie's arrival on the mainland and they had since learnt something far more terrifying. He was distracted momentarily by the newspaper clipping that he had finally managed to spread out sufficiently to flick his eyes over.

It was a half page photo showing the moon landing and underneath a smaller photo of Dr Rodney McKay, brilliant physicist responsible for repairing the damaged component on the rocket. Without thought, a smile came to John's face as he looked at the picture. Rodney had done it, achieved fame in a way that he had yearned for and he felt a sudden keen sense of loss at the hole his friend had left. He still missed him, annoying traits and all, and even given the that fact that they had barely had time to breath in the time that Rodney had been gone – there were still moments when something completely selfish and thoughtless that Rodney had said would pop into his mind.

"Sir – where did you get this?' John's mind was still on the picture and had inadvertently blanked out the other things he had said.

Distracted also now, the General replied. "It just appeared on my desk amongst a pile of my usual mail. I thought it had been sent to me – perhaps I came to it by other means... anyway, it looks like the man had the ability after all, to ensure that the future remained as it should be. Anyway... Sheppard. You're getting me off track here. The girl. Just what the hell is going on with that? I mean, if I'd wanted to spend this much time in the Pegasus galaxy, I'd have stationed myself here in Atlantis. You know how long that quarantine feels in the half way station. Not fun at all..."

"No sir, it's not." John tried to hide the smile that wanted to show itself. Even given that this was an extremely serious situation, the General had a way of exploding like a loose cannon and was incredibly easy to distract... sometimes like a young child. John imagined that he would have been hell to grow up with.

"About Carlie sir... there have been developments..."

John had briefed his security personnel later the day before and at Carson's insistence they had run more tests on her, this time he had performed a full body scan, alerted by the feelings of cold inside her stomach, the same ones that Gina had complained of. Carson had had misgivings about these feelings and wondered if they were a catalyst for something more sinister. What he had found had sickened him and he had alerted John immediately.

The Colonel had come running into the infirmary and had found Gina and Teyla standing beside the table where the scan was performed. Carlie had been given a light sedative in order to keep her completely still during the procedure, and she was almost asleep on the bed and unaware that anything was wrong. Gina had tears running down her cheeks and Teyla was comforting her.

"What is it Carson, what's wrong?" His eyes shot to the doctor after taking in Gina's distress and Carson shook his head. John reached Gina's side and gently touched her cheek, wiping away some of the tears.

"Look at this Colonel, on the screen here. See that black mass, the small one just tucked away behind the intestines here. I missed it first time around, it must have been hidden or smaller – but it's definitely visible now."

"What the hell is it Doc? Some sort of tumour?"

"Something like that Colonel, only worse. It's man made, partially organic only. It reacts like a tumour, growing and will eventually destroy the cells in her body. But it is more than that. It is in effect, a small bomb. It will be triggered remotely, in much the same way as her handlers access her mind and plant suggestions in order to get her to do their bidding. I would imagine that this is their fail safe. If the plan doesn't work, they either trigger this remotely so that she explodes and takes out quite a lot of people around her, or wait until it does the job itself. Either way, it's a lose lose situation for this wee thing here..."

John froze in shock, unable to comprehend what he was seeing and what he had heard. "Who would do this to a child. It's beyond sick Carson, it is incomprehensible. Those people are monsters. We need to do more than find a way to seal that damn rift. We need to get through and make sure that they don't do this sort of thing again on innocent people. They need to be stopped."

"Carson, what can you do? Can you remove it safely. Is it operable?" Gina's eyes were riveted to Carson's.

Hope surged in John. Now who was the one thinking with a clear head? The woman he had accused of thinking only with her emotions. Gina was right – Carson could operate. Remove the damn thing and destroy it. Give this little girl her life back.

"I'm looking into that Gina. It's in a delicate place, but unless there are any other nasty surprises down there, I think I can do it. I'll need some help though. And it will be a long procedure."

"Carson? This is what was causing the cold feeling in her stomach, the one she had complained of? I have that same feeling – does that mean I have one of those in there?" Horror shone through Gina's eyes now as she realised the implications of what she had said, then contemplated the scan machine that Carlie was now being observed under. "Does this machine emit radiation?"

Carson knew immediately why she was asking and was quick to reassure her. "No Gina, this is a MRI scan – it does not use radiation, it uses radio and magnetic waves to form images. It is perfectly safe. Colonel? I'll need to prepare for a surgery of this magnitude and will commence tomorrow morning."

"That'll give me time to inform the SGC what is going on. This is beyond our security level here. Time to bring in the big guns..."


	61. Chapter 61 With Bated Breath

CHAPTER 61 – WITH BATED BREATH

John had taken the time to calm the General down. He understood exactly where he was coming from. In the space of two weeks, world war three had come down hard on Atlantis in more ways than one and John was fighting to hold his head above water. He needed someone to share the problems. Sam was doing a hell of a job and she had stepped in at a time when her expertise was more than invaluable, and Elizabeth was in the process of closing off all her open files and would leave soon. She had contemplated staying until all of this had been sorted, but thought it best to leave Sam a clear playing field.

"The operation is about to begin, sir... and unfortunately Carson is not allowing any observers in there. Only his medical staff and Gina – she will assist and we also want to monitor her reaction to the device."

The General's eyebrows shot up. "Is that wise Sheppard? She may likely have some adverse affect to it – reports are that she is experiencing the same symptoms as the girl, so is it possible she has the same device in her?"

"We've checked sir, and she is clear..."

John frowned when he recalled her reaction to the MRI scan yesterday. He had been asked to keep Carlie company until she came out of her sedative, while Carson supervised the scan he wanted to do on Gina. When John had asked if he could be at her side, he had received a curt 'no' from the doctor. Alarmed at this refusal, he had looked at Gina and she had slid her eyes away. Something strange there, but in light of all that had occurred, he had not pushed the issue. Simply done what he was asked to do and keep Carlie company.

Carson had found nothing unusual inside Gina and John reported this to the General now. "Carson thinks that she is just linked somehow to Carlie and the device is actually targetted specifically at her. She is the one they want, so this does make sense – sort of..."

"It's these 'sort of's' that I'm having the most difficulty with Sheppard. There's too many of them lately. Damn – if Rodney was around, these 'sort of's' would be definites."

At this John could not resist a bark of laughter. "With all due respect sir, I know you have worked a little with Rodney in the past – but here in Atlantis? Rodney was kinda the king of 'sort of's' – he winged it more than once I have to say. Just had the lucky knack of hitting the nail on the head most of the time."

"You still miss him.. eh Sheppard?" On their way to the infirmary now, Jack had paused outside the mess, deciding whether or not to risk a cup of coffee. He had certainly tasted better than what was prepared here in Atlantis.

"Some days General, not at all. Especially when he was in true Rodney form, moaning about everything. But other days.. yeah. He had a gift – you either loved him or hated him, and some days you never knew which one it was going to be. But he got the job done, and got us out of more tight spots that I can give him credit for. His heart was certainly in the right place – most of the time."

"He's not dead Colonel! That sounded somewhat like a eulogy..." Jack decided cafeine was a requirement and indicating the mess door, gave John the signal that he would duck quickly in here.

"It kinda feels like he's dead... I mean, what are the chances of us seeing him again. Apart from random newspaper clippings that show us he more or less did what he was supposed to do?"

"To be honest Colonel, who knows what the future brings. He may just arrive back on your doorstep one day... maybe the 1960's will get sick of him and send him back here – swap him for someone else..."

John chuckled at that. "Maybe... as you say, who knows. But we've got a great team here and Sam will be the perfect addition."

"A word of advice Colonel – stay on her good side. That woman has a hidden mean streak... oh boy!"

Chuckling again John said. "Bet you don't have the guts to say that in her presence...sir!"

"No siree... I value certain parts of my anatomy just the same as you do Sheppard." And whistling a little now, the General continued out of the mess and John had no choice but to follow him, shaking his head. Some times he never knew just how to take the General. He was a man of many sides and John thought he had seen most of them now. But once in a while he brought out another one. Just for the hell of it.

An hour later and they were still pacing restlessly outside the infirmary. The General did not do 'waiting' well – for that matter neither did John, but General O'Neill, his long legs disliked inactivity intensively, finding that his knees seized up easily these days. Ronon joined them and soon it was the three of them pacing restlessly and John had the brief somewhat amusing thought, that they must have resembled expectant fathers and almost asked out loud where the cigars were. Teyla joined them for a short time but found their restlessness disconcerting. She had her own ways of finding peace within herself and did not need to resort to endless walking up and down a corridor. It was not her way.

One of the medical staff finally walked out but it was not to give them good news. He held a partly collapsed Gina in his arms, she was folded over and groaning in pain, gripping her stomach.

"Damn it Sheppard! I told you she shouldn't have been in there." The General got to her first and took her from the medical asistant so that he could go back in and continue with his assist of the operation. He lifted her easily and carried her back inside. The operation had been set up in a separate room and the infirmary beds were still accessible an he laid her down on one of the beds, reaching behind to flatten the pillow slightly so that she was lying flat.

"Gina? Hey..." John had moved up beside the bed and picking up a hand rubbed it hard as if to put some warmth back into it. She was freezing cold and had started to shiver and John did the only thing he could think of under the circumstances. He eased himself up onto the bed beside her and pulled her against him, wrapping her in his warmth. Alarmed by the shivering, he looked toward the room where the operation was being completed, hoping that one of the medical staff would come out to have a look at her.

Lorne walked in then and suddenly the infirmary seemed too small. He too appeared alarmed to see Gina shivering as though she would never get warm again. "What happened Colonel? Has the operation finished? Did something go wrong?"

John responded to the alarm in his voice and told himself that the Major had every right to show concern. From one friend to another. "I don't know what's going on Lorne. Someone just brought her out like this, but so far – no one has told us anything."

Just then a nurse came from another direction running. Carson had contacted emergency staff to come in and assist in the infirmary and the nurse taking one look at Gina, moved quickly to her side and pushed John's arms and hands away.

"I'm sorry Colonel. You'll need to move. I have to take a look at what's happening to her and I can't do that with you draped all over her." She smiled at him to show that she meant it in the kindest way, and he eased himself off the bed and let the nurse take over. General O'Neill and Major Lorne, now feeling uncomfortable and in the way, gestured vaguely toward the door and Ronon, giving the girl on the bed a hooded look, turned and left also. Leaving John and the nurse and one woman who lay groaning in pain on the bed.

"Is she having some sort of reaction to the device that Carson is trying to remove?" He ran a hand through his hair – he felt useless, hell – less than useless. Wanting nothing more than to help her and this inability to do something that should be so simple was making him want to hit out at something.

"Colonel – please. I need to have a look at her. I'll answer all your questions after I've finished my examination. Why don't you go and sit down over there – you'll still be able to see, but at least you'll not be in my way."

At that moment the door to the operating room burst open and a frazzled looking Carson came out, looking extremely tired and very disheveled.

"Mary? How is she? Sorry Colonel, I had to remain sterile, I couldn't get to her in time."

"That's ok Carson – have you finished? Did it work – is it out?"

Carson held up a hand. "One thing at a time Colonel. Yes, we've finished. I've left my assistants in there to sew her back up and I will have the device brought out to you shortly. You'll be wanting it tested by some of the science people to find out exactly what it's use is."

Again John thought fleetingly of Rodney. This would have been the sort of project that he would have gleefully leapt into head first. Just enough hint of the mysterious to capture his interest. Zalenka would no doubt step up to the plate, unless Sam herself wanted to check it over.

"Does it look as thought there will be any residual effects from the device? Or is it too early to tell?"

He was just about to answer when Sam walked in and went immediately to Gina, looking at the nurse completing her exam before turning to Carson.

"Ok Carson. Give me the good news first so I can savour something sweet. Then I'll take the bad."

Carson's eyebrows shot up. She was a straight talker and he thought carefully before he answered her. "Good news? We got the device out. Bad news Colonel? Colonels... Gina appears to be linked to the device and as soon as we removed it she was hit by instant pains. That is my worry at the moment. They've obviously built another fail safe into their little science experiment and when I get my hands on those arrogant bastards, I shall decide whether or not to perform a few experiments of my own. Without anaesthetic. What I saw in there was beyond cruel. To place a device such as that inside a child for reasons that are preposterous in themselves. To get Gina to their dimension. The mind boggles. I don't know what to do with Gina and her pain – if we destroy the device, we could effectively kill her – I just don't know..."

Carson was upset – more so than John had ever seen him and he placed a hand on the doctor's shoulder. "You've done your best Doc – hell – you always give more than your best. That is never in question. Sam?" He turned now to the new base commander and she left Gina's side at the sound of her name. "What do we do here? We're screwed whatever we do. We destroy the device, we may kill her – keep it near her and maybe that is how they track her, and she gets sucked into their … place..." He didn't want to use the word dimension, didn't want to acknowledge that it existed. For now it was a pretend place and that was fine by him.

Sam's face was pensive. She turned back to the woman on the bed, then looked at Carson. "Can you keep her lightly sedated, so that the pain is controlled for now? At least until we decide how to proceed with this?" Carson knew what she was really asking, knew she wanted to know whether it would be safe for the baby and mentally cursed Gina for not telling him. These were exactly the decisions he would need to be fully informed for, in order to make and it was unfair for Carson to allow him to think that there were less risks than what there really was.

"Sedation can be dicey Colonel and it's not something I would normally recommend. In this case though, I don't think we have much of a choice. She is experiencing intense pain as a result of the device. We could try moving it a far distance from her – perhaps it is governed by how close she is to it?"

John's eyes widened. "Last night in bed, she experienced the cold feeling and Carlie had just climbed into bed with us. The first time the pain hit – wasn't that the first time she had contact with Carlie? Proper contact? And didn't the pain ease once she left the mainland?"

"You could be onto something there Colonel. Mary? Go into the operating room and tell them not to bring the device back into here. They're to take it and place it in a lined box, one of the boxes that we used to store that nuclear device we had to move through the city. Then get one of the marines to take it down to one of the lower chambers."

John spoke up. "Tell them to take it to the room with the portal – the one where Gina came through and the one that is a suspected second portal to … there... according to Carlie, anyway. Maybe it'll just disappear back to where it came from."

"That'll effectively be telling them we're onto them John." Sam was shaking her head. "They may retaliate, and on a larger scale. They may send someone after Carlie."

"Let the bastards come. My teams will be ready for them. Of that you can be sure."

"You'd better be very sure Colonel, because arrogance like that can lead to the downfall of a city."

Sam spoke sharply, needing to make him think carefully about what he was saying. "Do what you need to do Colonel and I'll work on getting that damn portal closed. For good."


	62. Chapter 62 To Close the Portal

CHAPTER 62 – TO CLOSE THE PORTAL

General O'Neill found Sam almost asleep over one of the lab desks down in Rodney's old lab. "Sam, honey? I've been looking for you. When did you last get some proper rest?" He walked around behind her and started to lightly rub her shoulders and she groaned.

"Aahh Jack, I've missed that..." Smiling now, she pushed herself away from the papers that were spread out around her. "I'm nearly there Jack. I think I'm onto something. Closing that damn portal so that we can rest again, so the whole city can rest again. So that little girl can have a chance at having a normal life here."

"Whatcha got? In simple terms please..."

She laughed at him, knowing that he only feigned his ignorance, was in fact an extremely intelligent man. "I'm going to need one of the ZPM's Jack and some good old fashioned fire power. That should get yours and John's testosterone flowing more than sufficiently. I know how you boys like to play with your weapons."

Jack's eyes gleamed. "So I get to stay and play... hmmm? Been too long since I've been out in the field. Kinda missed it. I didn't miss the sore body though, aaah getting old is a bitch. The body wants what it used to have, but sadly... you know how it goes..."

"Actually Jack, no I don't. Not there yet..."

"Cheeky wench! Don't rub your youth in my face. Us old boys can still teach you young ones a few tricks."

She winked at him. "I know that for a fact, flyboy... anyway, back to the portal. Mind on work Jack – let's get the testosterone back in it's bottle for now. If I hook up a ZPM to one of the electromagnetic pulse weapons that we created to destroy the replicators... this would increase the pulse to a range that would effectively shatter any rift, theoretical or otherwise."

"Far be it from me to give you a lesson in physics, but wouldn't that widen the rift – aiming all the energy into it?"

"I have a theory as to how these rifts formed. By Carlie's admission, they have been undergoing a wide range of experiments in their dimension, I imagine in much the same way as we do here. There has been some theory that experimentation with particle accelerators may have the effect of creating tiny black holes. What I am surmising is that they had created a device that used particle acceleration intentionally, to create a rift in the dimensions – or it is possible they were seeking to control a rift in time, which is essentially what a black hole can be determined as."

Jack's eyes had begun to glaze over and she punched him lightly on the arm. "Listen Jack, don't you dare play that dumbass card with me. It so does not work anymore... I've been onto you for years! Anyway, as I was saying, we can use a supercharged electromagnetic pulse to combat the effects of the particle accelerator."

"Supercharged as in using the ZPM to juice it up?" The General was fascinated now.

"Rodney was not only looking into it while he was here... but back on earth in his new time line – did you know Jack...one early test of electronic space warfare took place in 1963 when the United States exploded a ground-launched nuclear weapon in space to test the effects of an electromagnetic pulse. The result was a deactivation of many then-orbiting satellites, both American and Soviet. The unfocused effects of the EMP test led to the banning of nuclear weapons in space in the Outer Space Treaty of 1967. Just who do you think was responsible for that one...hmmm?"

"Aaah crap... so he did manage to stuff something up..." Jack scrubbed a hand down his face.

"He did Jack... but this 'stuff up' let him to work on his research here in Atlantis. He's perfected the electromagnetic pulse warfare, hell, we fought the replicators with it. And he also found that they could essentially render damage from a particle accelerator... useless."

"So, getting confused here Sam... he stuffed up intentionally back on earth in 1963?"

"No Jack, I don't think so. He tried to speed things along a little, introduce some of his theories too early and they weren't ready for it. I know John gave him fair warning about that just before he went through the portal. If he tried to expedite anything, the ancients would come down on him like a ton of bricks. I'm thinking that Rodney got his hands slapped on that one. But... by instigating the research into electromagnetic pulse earlier than it should have been – well guess what path my research took... so, leading me to this point where I can pick up Rodney's notes and complete the process."

"I thought the current theory was that Gina was supposed to complete his research?" Jack was scratching his head now.

"She found the link between time travel and dimensional portals." Sam held out some notes, this time in Gina's handwriting. "White holes... theory up until now – we could pass through a black hole and exit through a white hole. Think of this as the exhaust end of a black hole. Instead of pulling everything into its gravitational force, the white hole would push everything out and away from it - perhaps into another time or even another universe. Put simply, the idea here is "what goes into a black hole must somehow come out." If a black hole tears the space-time fabric of "our universe" creating a wormhole, a white hole would be the entry point into the "other universe." Essentially, a white hole would be the mathematical representation of the black hole in reverse."

Sam took a deep breath, slapping a hand onto the notes that she had spread out around her. "White holes have been theory up until now, Gina surmises that it is likely that the particle accelerator device that they have been playing around with 'over there' has created both a black and white hole – effectively the black hole is the time portal and the white hole is the dimensional portal. They have a way for them to successfully co-exist."

"And Gina found this? Her reason to be here..."

"One of them Jack. You'll find out soon enough what the other is..."

"Are you holding out on me Colonel Samantha Carter?" Be bent down to kiss her, after sneaking a peak behind him that they were indeed alone down here.

"Just a little Jack.. but it's not my news, so my lips are sealed..."

"Ah ha... let's hope the surprise does not cause unnecessary implications... it seems we've had enough of those. Time for bed Sam.. you've done good sweetheart, as usual. It's all falling into place, isn't it. The players are doing exactly the moves as set out for them. If I hadn't already experienced the arrogance of the ancients first hand, I would never have believed them capable. But they are..."

It took a week for Sam to round out her theories and she spent a lot of that time pouring over notes, calculations and theoretical models with Gina. The device retrieved from Carlie had been safely stored away in the lower room of the city, the same room that held the time/dimensional portal. When John had gone back down there the following day, he was not surprised to find that it had simply...gone. There would be no element of surprise for them now. The 'other side' knew they had determined exactly what Carlie had been sent to do. A child assassin from another universe.

The pains in Gina's stomach had lessened significantly within hours of the removal of the device and by the day after the operation she had felt more or less pain free. Carson had continued to keep her in the infirmary, along with Carlie who was recuperating from the operation to remove the device. Angel had been a constant visitor between the two, much to Carson's disapproval. He did not like the idea of any animal being in a sterile environment but he had been outnumbered and had had to eventually give in. Carlie now resided in a bed beside Gina and as Gina refused to actually spend her recuperation time in the bed, it was generally in a seat beside Carlie's bed, reading books to the little girl. She slept on and off throughout the two days after the operation with no memory of what had been done to her, either by the medical staff in Atlantis or the people of her world.

Once Sam had rounded out her theories she called a meeting for all personnel who would be involved with the portal closure. That included all engineers, military, security and a large science team who were busy working on the EMP discharger hookup with one of the city's ZPM's. This was the difficult part. Having given them the calculations required, they still needed to find a day to get the accelerated power source compatible with the EMP pulse without overloading it.

Gina and John had spent little time together during that week. He had visited her during the early part of the week when she had still been incarcerated in the hospital – the latter part of that week for her had been spent in conference with Sam and visiting Carlie. John had worked with his security teams and they had been back to the mainland several times to set up perimeter guards around the area they thought contained the rift, to ensure that if anyone attempted to come through to get the girl, they would be ready for them.

He had been worried about getting his men too close, in case they accidently went through it but Sam was quick to point out that at this stage, the rift was too small for an average sized man to get through, and there would be an electrical sensation when they got to the point where they crossed. He intentionally blocked off a five meter radius of the supposed area and nothing would be allowed in or out of that perimeter.

John, running late for the meeting that Sam had called, entered the room with an apology on his lips and noted immediately that Gina had not arrived either.

He raised an eyebrow at Sam. "Anyone seen Gina yet? Thought you guys had been down in your lab this morning, and you were en route together?"

Sam's eyes were serious. "She had to make a small detour John. Wasn't feeling too well... she'll be here soon."

Something slammed into him then, something he had been missing and been struggling to piece together and he went to leave the room again. Sam stopped him with a curt voice.

"Leave her John. Deal with it later. We need to get this plan underway."

He sat down, his expression darkening as the implications sunk in and when Gina finally arrived late to the meeting, looking pale and extremely fragile, he turned dark brooding eyes on her that had a sickening feeling rising from the pit of her stomach. One that had nothing to do with the new life that was growing in there.


	63. Chapter 63 Ommissions

CHAPTER 63 – OMMISSIONS

She stood, waiting for the others to leave the meeting. The weapon was almost ready and would be tested tomorrow morning on the mainland, deciding to go straight for the larger rift as this was the only place that humans appeared to have been successful in getting through. They had discussed taking Carlie with them, in case she was required to activate the portal in some way and while Gina had registered instant opposition, she was immediately shut down by Sam with a stern look. The girl was an integral part of their plan and like it or not, she would be a part of the solution.

John remained seated and she knew that he had somehow discovered what she had chosen to keep hidden for now. He pushed roughly out of his seat now and prowled toward her like a panther, eyes menacing, posture tense. She told herself that she was not afraid of him, that he would never hurt her, not really... but the look in his eyes had her backing up against the wall until he stood directly in front of her.

Instinctively her hand reached down to cradle her stomach and his eyes followed the movement.

"John..." she began, and her eyes pleaded with him to understand.

"Dont. Make. Excuses." He ground it out and she knew that he was holding himself in check as she saw his fist curl automatically. He wanted to hit out at something, but knew instinctively that it would not be her. Not John. Especially not after what she had already been through with one man.

He saw the shift in her eyes as she registered his curled fist and saw the flicker of fear that she thought she had controlled and felt shame. Immediately. Hot and intense. How dare he make this woman feel threatened by him physically. After what that bastard had done to her? How dare he make that look come into her eyes. Never again.

He stood back from her, putting distance between the two of them and dropped his head, raking his hand through his hair. He debated simply leaving the room. Dealing with this another time when he had had time to process it. But couldn't.

She remained silent. Waiting for him to speak again, once he had control of himself.

"How long have you known?" There was less anger in his voice now and for that she was grateful.

"Since we found Carlie. Carson found out when he ran the tests after he brought me back from the mainland. I chose not to say anything, against the better judgement of Carson and Sam I might add. This is on me alone John."

"Two weeks – you've carried this around on your own for two weeks? Damn it Gina – this is my baby, you've been going through all sorts of other crap and you chose to do this one alone? Why?"

"I wanted to sort things out with Carlie first. I didn't want anything hanging over … this..." Again she rubbed her stomach gently and this time, fascinated, he stepped up and placed his own hand there and brought his eyes up to hers.

"Our baby... a miracle baby. Born of two parents from different times. This is what Carlie's people want. They know, don't they?"

"Oh John, you'll figure it all out, just like I have... This baby has already happened in their dimension. Carlie is this baby. They've learnt to shift both time and dimension. They sent Carlie into to this dimension, forward in time to bring herself back. You see John... ripples from your trip back to 1962, even in their dimension. You are not the father of the Carlie who lies in the infirmary now. In their dimension, in their time – another has fathered Carlie. Sam and I? We've been throwing ideas around this past week. And it was this theory that made the most sense."

"Gina... you're doing my head in. Who is the father? And why is their timeline different to ours?"

"The father does not hold the ancient gene, neither do I. By Carlie's admission, their society does not possess the ancient gene. Your jaunt back to 1962 changed that. By going back when you did, you pushed him out of the picture... and brought me back here. This child..." she rubbed her stomach, his hand still placed firmly over hers, "... now has the gene of one strong ancient as well as an ascended being. This is what they want."

She moved her hands up to frame his face, looking into the hazel eyes that held so much confusion now.

"John, their dimension is essential similar to ours, only small subtle differences. Some in technology – obviously they are more advanced in some areas, and not as advanced in others. The main difference is the lack of ancient gene, bred out over the centuries. This lack of ancient gene has caused some of the events to happen differently. There is no ascended being there recalculating every event to make sure that things stay on a straight path. They have had to rely on whatever happens here, to filter through the rifts to their dimension. The small rifts, where only tiny phsyical things can get through – changes to timelines – ripples, can filter through these rifts. So what is affected here, is affected there... but in a different way. Do you follow?"

He moved his hands up to lightly grip her wrists and brought her hands back down to rest on her stomach.

"I'm with you, but tell me – who is the father of Carlie in their world? I need to understand how that all fits in."

"Obviously I still came to the Pegasus galaxy, or I wouldn't be Carlie's mother. That much filtered through. But for some reason you and I didn't connect – or we did connect, and something changed... I'm thinking the latter. Pull Carlie's face up in your mind. Who does she remind you of? Whose features, other than mine – do you see?"

"Terrence... crap... how?"

"Yep, that's my theory anyway. And how? Oh, I guess the usual way. Man and woman meet..."

He bumped his forehead against hers softly. "You know what I mean... in their dimension, how can you have connected with him...oh..." His voice trailed off... "your other self didn't get pregnant that first time, you and I, because we didn't make love that night, did we?... but after I left and Terrence was released from jail, you met him didn't you?"

"Not me John... don't get the two women confused. We are not the same... but yes, your theory fits. I became pregnant with Terrence's child and came here not knowing this.. after that, well it's their story, not ours. Ours travelled a different path. And that path is the one they want. They know that having you as the father of Carlie will create a child with an extremely strong ancient gene, one who will seed their own genetic pool. But they sacrifice their Carlie to achieve this."

"How can Carlie bring herself back? Doesn't work like that..."

"She wouldn't go back – she would stay here, in this dimension and this time line – sort of what Rodney had to do. Balanced."

"All this Gina? All of this, because the ancients sent me back to 1962? Did they know about this? The dimensional rift... was that part of their plan also?"

"Yes... I needed to be the bridge between ideas. Between Rodney's initial work and Sam's eventual plan to close the rift. I had to connect the dots, show that time travel and dimensional travel co-exist in one portal. Rodney could never have made the connection – it was never intended that he be in this time line long enough. Up to this point John, we have all been carefully placed. Now? We fly blind. This is as far as they take us. We're on our own, finally – to make our own mistakes, and create our own problems. Callandra's role on earth has been to reconfigure and recalculate every little shift in time to make sure unwanted paradoxes to do occur. To keep the path straight and even – filling up the holes as they were created. It is an immense task , of epic proportions and unimaginable responsibility."

He pulled her into his arms now and felt the tiny flutters in her stomach as it rested gently against him. Life begets life.


	64. Chapter 64 Life As They Knew It

CHAPTER 64 – LIFE AS THEY KNEW IT

John followed her out of the conference room, head clouded with a thousand questions, unable to connect a thousand dots. He strained to make connections, to follow the thought process that these two women had been working on the for the better part of the week. He understood action. Strength and might. He did not understand the intricacies that threaded this complicated web that continued to spin out of control around them.

_Time and distance. Conundrums and paradoxes. Ripples..._

Gina walked silently beside him down the hallway, knowing he was lost in his thoughts and wondering when he would come to the same conclusion she did. And saw the moment that he did as he stopped in the hallway and turned anguised eyes towards her.

"She can't stay here, can she? Carlie is also this child... " and he placed his hand on her stomach as it sunk in. "She can't stay in this dimension because she already exists here. And she cannot exist in two timelines and two dimensions at once for any length of time...ah crap Gina. I can't send her back. How do I send her back? To life as an experiment?"

"I don't know John... I've tried my best to work everything out so far.. but I get stuck on this one. I need help, help from Callandra... I don't know where to go from here..."

"You've done your best Gina, you've been amazing. But you need to take care of yourself and our baby for now. You need to sit back and let others handle all the details and the problems. I need to take care of you, of you both. I need to know you're safe."

He moved forward to fold her into his arms and he heard her sigh and felt that tilt and shift of his world and he realised that in his arms now, he held his whole world.

"We don't have a lot of time to work it out John. Tomorrow Sam is going to attempt to close the portal. That's Carlie's way home. Either she goes or she stays and accepts the consequences, as we all do – of whatever decision gets made."

"I know. For this moment I just want to hold you and think about us. Selfish, yes.. but I need that moment."

"Then take your moment, me? I need more..." and gripping his face she pulled it down to bring his lips in contact with hers and kissed him with so much passion and heat that he felt his brain begin to boil.

"Go easy.. hmmm? My insides feel like they're burning.. damn, I want you."

In response she took his hand and led him to the nearest transporter and once inside, pushed him hard against the wall. Her small hands fumbled to get under his shirt and touch his skin and he trembled slightly at her touch, aroused immediately and wanting desperately to feel her heat, to slide slowly in and out and see the look on her face as she neared her peak. He dropped his head to her neck and brought his hands up to graze roughly over her already hardened nipples, fully erect through the black base tshirt, the abrasive material causing stimulation to the point of pain and she moaned.

"God, I hope the ancients didn't rig these transporters up with security cameras... or we're going to be the feature for the next movie night.." He took his mouth away from her neck and moved back to her lips, moving his lower region away from her questing hands. "Greedy girl... wait... we're nearly there."

The transporter reached it's destination and he dragged her out none too gently, registering her disheveled hair and flushed face and smiled to himself. And hoped that they would run into no one in the hall between the transporter and his private quarters. One look at Gina and it would become more than obvious where they were rushing off to.

Another stolen moment in time. Just the two of them and it gave them the clarity they needed to be able to go on and make bigger decisions. Bigger decisions that would affect a six year old girl who had become a part of their lives. Gina pushed all demands out of her mind but one. John's needs and his fierce desire to feel himself inside her. She needed it to, needed him to complete her and fill the hole that threatened to suck her under if she thought about it any more.

Amidst tangled sheets there was only the two of them. In this moment in time. Their time, their dimension, no ripples. Together, limbs tangled in sweaty disarray and his hand stoked her inner thigh to calm the tremors that still rippled under the skin. He was still inside her, buried as deep as he could go and if he just closed his eyes now, they could stay here – their moment in time. Just the two of them.

She moved then, suddenly restless and he felt the stirrings of passion begin to fill his resting manhood, stretching to fill her with the ease of a perfect fit. She moved against him, needing the friction, demanding the action and he chuckled softly, letting her take the lead now as she rolled him over and pushed herself up. His hands spanned her small waist, and his thumbs stroked over her stomach, still flat but filling slowly with new life. His life. Their life. His eyes closed almost sleepily and he watched her beneath lowered lids, raking slowly over her perfect body, hair in disarray around her face, blue eyes looking down at him as they clouded slowly as passion began to build again. His hands moved upward to stroke her breasts and she smiled then and he felt he could have looked at her like this forever. Then thought nothing at all as he came, hard and fast – as though this was the only way he could keep her beside him.

Head on his chest she idly played with his chest hair while he cupped her bottom, keeping her pressed tightly against him.

"We need to send her back Gina... don't think there's a way around that one. I won't risk you or our baby. In this dimension. We can't cloud the two dimensions. Our goal here is to close the portal so that they stay separate, distinct. We let her stay? That breaks the rules. It's gonna break a lot more to do it, but I don't see that we have a choice."

She didn't answer, just kept her cheek pressed against his chest, listening to him breathe, listening to him talk.

"Gina?"

Still nothing and concerned now he peered how into her face. Sound asleep, resting, at peace for this moment in time. And he sighed. Things were about to go spinning out of control again.


	65. Chapter 65 One Mission To Rule Them All

CHAPTER 65 – ONE MISSION TO RULE THEM ALL

The weapon was ready, installed and waiting in the gate room at 0900 hours the next morning. A serious Sam and General O'Neill stood beside it. Jack had decided to stay on base until this was completed. It was a big mission and while he trusted his Colonel, make that Colonel's, implicitly, he felt that he should be here, to ensure that it all went to plan and there were no casualties. He felt a certain connection to young Gina, given the history between her and his older brother and the fact that she had been instrumental in getting him where he was. That was something he had managed to get his head around quite quickly and it came to the forefront of his mind whenever he looked at her. A debt of gratitude. And he'd try and repay it by keeping her safe on this mission, watching Sheppard's back and keeping this family unit intact.

Cam Mitchell had wanted in on this one too and it took a direct order from the General to get him to stand down. These connections, these threads that Gina Mitchell had woven with her presence in Atlantis, with John's going back to 1962 – they all had a debt of gratitude to her, in getting them where they were today. His Sam, also. If Jacob had not married Catherine... who would Sam had been today? Not the Sam that he had fought alongside, and eventually grown to love. The only player missing from this little round of the tournament was Rodney... and Jack had a sneaking suspicion they hadn't seen the last of him. Stranger things had happened.

In the gear room Major Lorne had taken over fussing around Gina's tactical vest. John was still with the rest of the security team, last minute instructions for those who were not already guarding the perimeter. Ronon and Teyla were with John. It seemed that everyone was going to be hands on for this mission and Atlantis would be left to the scientists and the medical staff.

Lorne tipped up Gina's chin to catch the expression in her eyes. "You've gotten us all this far – you ready to do the rest?" He smiled, his hands dropping back down to the fastenings on the vest, pulling everything as tight as he could make it, checking clips and passing her the Beretta that she had been training with. She reached down and slipped it into the thigh holster and did not see his eyes follow her movements then come up to rest on her bent head.

When her head came back up to answer him, he was close – too close and she inadvertantly took a step back. "Ready Major? Ready to attempt something that is still theoretical? Ready to abandon a little girl back to a life where she was treated as an experiment? Not so much..."

He brought his hand up to cup her cheek. "You're one of the bravest woman I have known. Your father would be proud of you – hell, Colonel Sheppard must be proud of you. The way you handle yourself is exemplary. If you served in the military, I would be proud to serve alongside you. I trust you to have my back out there."

"As do I..." This came from Ronon, who had stepped into the gear room to pick up his own weapon. His gaze flickered between Gina and Lorne and the Major was quick to drop his hand from Gina's cheek. "I'm honoured to work alongside you today, out there."

This succinct comment brought tears to her eyes and she quickly crossed the room and wrapped her arms around the big man. He awkwardly hugged her back, but couldn't hide the quick smile that came to his face. He had distrusted her from the beginning, and she had proven him wrong. She was loyal to his friend in the face of everything and Ronon had never seen such moments of peace in his friend's eyes. She put that there and for that alone, she had his respect. But in light of everything that she had gone through, and what she was about to lose – Lorne was right. She was one of the bravest women he had known also. A warrior.

"Take care of him Ronon. Don't let him do anything stupid. If anything happens to me today – if this doesn't go down the way it's supposed to. Be there for him and get him through. He means everything to me.. to us..." she held her stomach and watched as Ronon's eyebrows shot skyward and the slow smile move across his face. He reached out and gently touched her stomach also and bent closer to her and whispered.

"Congratulations. This is what he needs. Something to come home to... I've got your back out there today – nothing is going to happen to your or to your baby. I'll lay down my life for you if it comes down to it."

"If you've finished putting your hands all over my woman, time to go you two!" John had entered the gear room having passed Lorne on his way to the gate room so he knew where to find his two missing team members.

Ronon grinned and walked over and slapped him on the back. "That was fast work Sheppard!" and he waggled his eyebrows comically, so that John knew exactly what he was talking about.

"So the secrets out eh? Gina?"

"Can't leave the godfather out of the loop, can I..." and John's beaming smile was reward enough.

"What is this 'godfather'? I'm no god... don't give me some stupid title that doesn't make any sense. You earth people and your need to name everything..." Muttering now, Ronon gave them a wink and moved out of the room, leaving Gina and John alone for a few precious moments.

"Ok sweetheart? I need to you to be careful out there. You have your instructions. Stay away from the portal, stay near Teyla – Ronon will get Carlie through – then we seal it up."

He watched her face darken a little. They had talked it through – over and over. Themselves, and then with Sam and the others. It was the only way. They did not see how she could remain in this dimension and not cause irreparable damage to either herself or them. She clutched at John's hand now, hating that she felt needy but knowing that when they got to the mainland, she would have to keep a respectable distance from him. He would not be there as her lover – there he would be a soldier, a leader and she needed to step back at that point and let him do his job. But just for now, she leaned in so that he could kiss her hard, pulling her up onto her toes and watching as her eyes went from dark to hot blue. Fire.

They entered the gate room and he left her then. Carlie was with Teyla. The little girl looked lost and confused. They had told her that she had to go back, could not simply just send her without some sort of explanation and both Gina and John had sat her down last night to explain why she could not stay. For all intents and purposes she was just a six year old and her brain did not comprehend what they had to do. She knew simply, that she would not be with them anymore.

Seeing Gina enter the gate room she broke away from Teyla and ran to her, hugging her around the legs. In spite of the bulky tactical vest, Gina bent down to pick her up and Carlie wound her arms around her neck and held on as though she would never let go. Gina's breath hitched and she couldn't help the tears that began to slide down her cheeks and Teyla was the only one who could move toward her and give her the physical support she herself needed. The others were all busy playing soldiers. The men were put away for now.

They took two jumpers to the mainland, John flying one and Major Lorne flying the other and Gina did not recall very much of the trip. Rushing water and blue sky, then landing and the journey thereafter became a blur. The soldiers loaded the weapon from the back of one of the jumpers and Sam and General O'Neill supervised it's transit from the jumper area to the where a perimeter had been cordoned off around the area they believed to house the rift. Mindful that it was likely also a time rift, John had given clear instructions that no one was to approach it for any reason. The soldiers who had been guarding it for the last few days offered salutes as the new recruits arrived, casting curious glances at the weapon that was rolled between them – big and cumbersome and now hooked up to a ZPM. Untested and about to be unleashed.

Gina stood back with Teyla and Carlie. Watching from the background as the activity around them became frenzied. She kept visual contact with John at all times, needing to know that he was safe and not taking unnecessary risks, unaware that he did the same with her. Sam and Jack rolled the weapon into position and two technicians were bent over the controls, Sam standing back slightly now letting them make their final adjustments.

The air in front of the perimeter began to shimmer and Gina clutched her stomach,bending over and retching as spasm after spasm shot through her. Alarmed, Teyla let got of Carlie's hand and dropped to her knees beside Gina, forcing her down and lowering her head, allowing her to get her equilibrium back. All eyes suddenly focused on them and Ronon, after flicking a glance at John, left the perimeter and strode over to the women.

"Teyla. I need to take the girl." Carlie had moved away, having watched the big man approach and sensing the shifting in the portal. She did not feel the pain herself. The device, now that it had been removed, was not able to activate inside her anymore, but she did feel something pulling her toward the portal. Something controlling her. She moved carefully, keeping a wary eye on Ronon as he neared. He did not yet have any clue as to what she intended to do, simply thought that she was afraid of him and needed to move away. She allowed him to close the gap a little, then turned and ran, just as the jagged edges of the portal split open and several men in combat gear pushed through, immediately fanning outward and aiming weapons at the waiting group.

Gina lay groaning on the ground, dimly aware that something was happening and that the pain in her stomach was escalating in proportion.

"Give us the woman. Let us have the child back and give us the woman. We'll leave quietly and no one will get hurt. Refuse our demands and we'll take appropriate action."

The large man at the apex of the slight V that fanned out around the portal, spoke. He did not resemble anyone from Atlantis that John could tell, however running his eye amongst the group, he saw Major Lorne's equivalent and two of his security team. The rest were strangers to him.

"You don't come into our world and issue demands. Not gonna happen. After what you did to that child, where we once might have shown you mercy, we now show you none." John raised his weapon and fired, hitting the spokesman cleanly through the heart, dropping him immediately.

"Colonel Sheppard!" General O'Neill had dropped to one knee and taken a firing stance and his voice could have stopped the devil in his tracks. John had reacted, had not given them time to state their position and now they were hopping on the left foot. Retaliation would follow.

The Atlantis security team kept their weapons trained on the other men, awaiting orders. From somebody. Colonel Sheppard had said nothing further. His finger tightened on the trigger of his P90 and Jack knew he was a hair breath away from firing on all the men that stood there. He had made his position clear. If he found out that these people were using children to further their ill gotten gains, then he would use whatever force necessary to stop them. He did not intend now, to back down on what he had clearly stated.

"General, sir – with all due respect. We will not take prisoners. Our position has been made clear. Destroy the enemy by whatever force necessary and close the portal."

"Colonel Sheppard. I am in command here and you will stand down. We will give them the chance to surrender peacefully and go back to where they came from so that we can seal the portal. Terminal force as necessary Colonel."

Jack spoke quietly but there was an edge of authority to his voice that had John lightening his finger on the trigger and lowering his weapon slightly. Jack stepped forward, his own weapon still trained on the group.

"You heard me. We'll give you one chance to turn around and walk away. One chance. Consider that death there, retaliation for what you did to the child."

"We'll only walk away when we have the woman." Another had stepped forward now, casting only a glance at the man who lay dead at his feet. His gaze was on the woman who still lay in pain on the ground, Teyla beside her. "Her pain will go away if she comes with us."

"Her pain will go away if we close the damn portal." Sam spoke now and she looked up from the adjustments she was performing on the weapon. "The portal being open is what is causing the pain. Shut it, and all of her is here in this dimension. You have hooked something into her, when Carlie came through that first time... she is being torn apart by the two dimensions being open to each other."

The man who had spoken looked at Sam. "Your other is here. She is not hard like you, but soft." He smiled now, his face changing from soldier to the man. "She is my wife. Interesting, don't you think – how one thing can change from world to world. What affected her in my world to be who she is? Love, perhaps..."

"Don't speak to me about love. Don't speak to me at all. What you have done is adhorrent and will not be condoned in this world. Go. This is your last chance. Otherwise I'm sealing off the portal and you'll be stuck here forever. And I doubt you'll survive for long."

A small measure of fear crept into the man's eyes as he now took in the weapon that she stood in front of and understood it's implication. "You do not have the means to close the portal. Once torn, it cannot be mended."

"Wanna bet on that..." murmured John, his weapon now risen to firing position again. He had taken his attention from the others in the group and was now fully focused on the spokesman as he moved nearer, and he gripped his weapon to indicate that he was not to move any closer.

At that moment, attention briefly off the other men, they began firing and two of the marines next to John went down, fortunately protected somewhat by their tactical vests, but still sending them out of commission, giving the other men time to push through and overpower both John and General O'Neill, using them as hostages to back away from the rest of the security team who had immediately all turned weapons on them.

"Drop your weapons, or these men will be shot. And they would appear to be your military leaders, so I imagine that is not a viable option for you."

The man who spoke now advanced toward Gina – unprotected by the security team who had lost control of the portal, and unprotected by Ronon who had gone after the little girl. Teyla stood and took a defensive position beside Gina, but was overpowered quickly by the other man and thrown to the ground. He stood over Gina now and bent down to pick her up effortlessly. Looking down into her face, his own expression softened.

"We need you Gina – to bring hope to our people. I am sorry that it has come to this. We did not wish to resort to these tactics in order to get your help, but it appeared obvious that you would not come here of your own accord. We need your child. After you have had the child, you may return to your dimension to carry on with your life here. We only want the child."

She struggled to get down and could see John, a large arm thrown around his neck with a weapon pressed into his side. His face was like thunder and a part of her pitied the man when John eventually got away from him. For now, she had to fight for herself.

"You won't have my child. She belongs here, in this dimension. I'll die rather than let you take her."

Things happened in slow motion after that. Sam had managed to get her knee into a sensitive area of the man who had been holding her, and rolling immediately to the ground to secure her weapon that lay a little way off, she had come up firing, hitting three men before she was even on her feet. The man holding John ended up with a bullet in his leg and he let go of John suddenly and the man reacted quickly. He needed to free up his own soldiers, so he took aim and in the speed it took them to even register what he was doing, both he and Sam had managed to free all their men and had them secured on the ground. The larger man stood near the portal, holding Gina and John stood his ground, keeping his weapon trained on him.

"Fire at me Colonel Sheppard, and you'll hit the woman here. I know what she means to you. You'd rather she died?"

"I never miss..." Those were the last words he heard. John's P90 clattered and the man went down, eyes quickly shuttering as life left him and Gina fell from his arms her head hitting the base of a tree where she lay crumpled. John's weapon dropped immediately and he was down beside Gina, moving her head to check for injury. Blood came from a wound at the side, essentially reopening the one that had barely healed from her trip through the portal. Her eyes were shut, and he reached down taking her pulse, finding it thready and weak.

"Ronon?" He called, looking around for the Satedan who had gone after Carlie. "Did you get her?"

There was a crashing through the undergrowth and Ronon strode through carrying the small girl in his arms, keeping her head turned away from the carnage on the ground near the portal. He caught John's eye, saw Gina on the ground and raised his eyebrows at the mess that surrounded them.

"Missed the action big guy. She ok?"

"Scared, but yeah. Gina? What the hell happened here?"

"They decided to play heroes, caught us unawares and grabbed Gina. Lucky shot took the bastard down, but she's banged herself up on this tree. Crap. Sam?"

Sam was busy calibrating the machine and did not answer him. He pushed himself up, leaving Gina lying on the ground near the tree. He had to make sure that Ronon got Carlie through and that Sam got the device operational.

"Sam? We good to go? There'll be more coming through soon. We need to get that damn thing closed. Ronon? It's time man, get her through..."

"Sheppard..." Ronon had hesitated. "You sure this is the right thing to do? 'Cause it doesn't feel right to me."

John saw the indecision in Ronon's eyes and couldn't give him the assurance he needed. Because it didn't feel right to him either.

"Sam. I don't know if we can do this. It's murder. She's blameless in all this. We're sending her to her death. I can't do it – I'm sorry..."

Teyla had retrieved her weapon from the ground and joined John. "I agree with you John. It does not feel right to me either."

The General straightened from what he was doing and looked at John. "What other choice do we have Sheppard?"

"This one General O'Neill..." The voice came from behind them and as one, they all turned. They saw a being bathed in a glowing light and it was Sam who smiled at her.

"Grandma... or should I call you Callandra?"

"Hello child – you grow more beautiful each day. I see you have yourself in a little dilemma here?"

John stalked towards Callandra, who had seen Gina on the ground and immediately moved towards her, walking softly over the ground, glowing aura around her signifying the presence of an ascended being.

"This little dilemma is another one of your ripples Callandra. Can you fix it or not?" John's hand had curled into a fist and he stopped near Callandra, furious at the meddling that had culminated in this.

"Colonel Sheppard! You were supposed to take care of my daughter. What the hell is going on here?"

John closed his eyes in consternation as he registered the second voice. A second ascended being moved into the clearing. General Nathanel Mitchell. And he was pissed.

"Oh nothing... sir. Just trying to get ourselves out of the little crap storm that ancient meddling caused." General or not, he was not about to bow down to these two, ascended beings from a race of people who had essentially forced them into this situation.

Jack O'Neill was staring in fascination at the newcomers. "Great!" He rubbed his hands in glee. "Looks like a family reunion. Just what we need. Tell me.. General is it? Can you do anything about this mess. Like sort out somewhere where we can take this little girl so that we don't have to send her back to where she came from. And perhaps help your daughter over there... who has had to endure more than she should have?"

Major Lorne was the one who had dropped to the ground and was cradling Gina's head on his lap. He barely controlled his anger. While these arrogant beings and his supposed superiors fought over whose fault it was, Gina lay still and unresponsive on the ground. He placed his hands under her to pick her up, cradling her against him all the while glaring at anyone who dared to look his way. _I'll take a damn court martial if I have to. Orders or not, you can take a leap from somewhere tall and dark. Get your priorties clear here people. I'll look after Gina while you go engage in a pissing contest. _

John saw the look that Lorne passed his way and was torn. He needed to finish this. He'd leave Lorne to deal with Gina, get her somewhere safe... then he'd have it out with the Major. Once and for all.

"John. I have a solution for you. I can take her back with us to 1962. Terrence is her father in her timeline, her dimension. If we take her through to 1962, there will be enough time and distance to support both of them, once your baby is born. When she arrives, both her and Terrence will only know that they are father and daughter. There is another woman. He met her when he was released from jail. They will take in Jack when the father is killed in the accident along with Gina."

Jack had moved closer to Callandra as she spoke, watching her in fascination. "I remember her. I remember Carlie – my niece. She is younger than me – we grew up as sister and brother really – why do I only just remember her now?"

"Because she is only just coming into being in 1962. When she arrives there, it will be as if she has always been there. Fragments Jack."

Jack nodded. "I understand what you want to do Callandra, and I remember growing up with her. It is the right thing to do." He reached Ronon and held out his arms for the little girl to be transferred into. "Carlie sweetheart. You and I are going to become great friends. You'll see. Go with this lady now. She'll take you to a safe place, where no one will hurt you anymore. John?"

Jack paused now to look into the pale face of the Colonel. Felt sorry for the younger man, knowing what must be going through his head right now. Questions with no answers. Mysteries with no real hope of solving them.

John walked over to where Carlie was being held in Jack's arms and reached out a shaky hand to run over her long brown hair. "The General is right sweetheart. You need to go with this lady and man over here. They'll make sure you have a good life..." His words broke near the end and Jack reached out a hand to clamp down firmly on the Colonel's shoulder.

Nate had moved over to where Lorne stood uncertainly with Gina in his arms. He looked down at his daughter and stroked a hand down her face. Her eyes opened at his touch and widened when they looked and saw his face looking down at her.

"Daddy? Why are you here? What happened... where's John? And Carlie?"

"Shhh sweetheart. You've had another knock on that tough head of yours and are probably a little confused. Carlie is going to come back with us, to 1962. Terrence is her father, and she will fit smoothly into his life – you have our word on that. It's the least we can do... considering... And you Gina – are you happy?" He laid a hand on her stomach and smiled. Of course he would know. Didn't they know everything?

There was a loud humming noise and the portal began to shimmer again and Sam and Jack looked to John. "We need to get this thing closed people. Looks like we've got more company coming through."

"It's okay General O'Neill. Not coming through.. going. We've activated the time portal to take Carlie through." Callandra walked over to where the General stood, looking somewhat indecisive. "Samantha, sweetheart. It's time for us to go. We will be back – perhaps when the two of you decide to give me some great grand children... hmmm?"

Jack looked embarassed and Sam laughed. She had missed her grandmother dearly. They had shared a very strong bond growing up, particularly when her father spent so much time on the base and her mother had been immersed in the stargate programme. She walked up to Callandra and wrapped her arms around her, laughing at the sensation. There was no substance to her, just glowing light – and Sam's arms passed right through.

"I promise if we ever have a daughter, she'll be named Callandra – Callie for short."

"I'd like that Sam. General Jack O'Neill – you take care of my grand daugher. She is special..."

Jack chuckled. "That she is m'am – and I'll do my best. But Sam pretty much takes care of herself.

Major Lorne had gently put Gina down, but she was dizzy and felt sick, so he held her against him, supporting her weight as best as he could. Nate ran another hand down her face and she smiled at him, closing her eyes and hanging on to Major Lorne. "Go Daddy, I'll be fine. I've got plenty of people to watch out for me here."

"I know that sweetheart." He gave Major Lorne a salute and waited until Callandra had joined him, holding Carlie's hand. The little girl pulled away and ran to grab Gina around the legs, her little face looking up.

"Will I see you again?"

"I hope so sweetheart." She touched her stomach, wondering how the two would exist together in the same dimension, but decided that the ancients who stood in front of her must have worked it out and chose not to think too hard about it. Not at the moment anyway. Her head hurt and while the stomach cramping had stopped, she still felt dizzy and nauseous and desperately wanted to lie down and be held by John. In a cool dark room where she didn't have to think about anything.

They watched as the ascended beings, holding the hand of the little girl whose mother and father were from 1962 and whose place in the world up until this time, had been another dimension and another time. One of life's mysteries. She would return to the timeline she should have had, to one of the parents and her life would continue along on a new path. Gina wondered briefly, if she were to go back to earth now and visit Terrence, and his wife – where would Carlie be? An adult of course – in her fifties and amused suddenly, she smiled. Her child, but not her child. _Oh what a tangled web we weave._

Still supported by Lorne, she dropped her head onto his shoulder, now unimaginably weary, and watched as they stepped through the portal, gone in a flash of purple then felt the portal close within her own body, felt the pull as family members were winked out of this existence and into another one. Gone. She watched, eyes barely open now, as Sam and Jack fired up the weapon and it sent a massive electromagnetic blast at the portal, and Gina felt, rather than saw – the rift solder itself closed , merging together as a seamless blanket of time and dimension. And sighed. It was done. In the blink of an eye, the beat of a heartbeat – lives were changed and an entire family changed. In the blink of an eye.

Gina closed her eyes, head still resting on Lorne's shoulders, felt his hands touch her gently to rouse her, but she was so tired. Endlessly tired. Felt another pair of hands, strong and familiar – lift her into a strong pair of arms, also familiar and smiled. She knew his scent, knew the feel of his muscles as they carried her away from the area and struggled to open her eyes so that she could look up into his hazel ones.

"Hey..." He smiled, feeling the familiar weight of the woman he carried. His woman. His life. His child.

And she smiled back.

Her man. Her world. Their child...


	66. Chapter 66 Time to Reflect

CHAPTER 66 – TIME TO REFLECT

Angel had gone. John had security searching the city for her when they got back, but she had simply disappeared. Sam knew the effect this would have on Gina when she was told and faced John now in the control room.

"I think she went back with them John – to 1962. Remember, she came through accidentally, through the smaller rift down below."

"Not accidentally Sam – she was brought through to help Gina through the rift. If Angel hadn't already been here, she would have struggled to connect with this side. You remember what she told us about her experience in the 'dark' and going through the rift. She was convinced that Angel was the one that got her through."

They had all arrived back exhausted. Mission accomplished – yes, but attempting to process all that had happened on the mainland during that short time, John dreaded the mission report to come. It would be almost impossible to explain all that had gone down. He had taken Gina straight to the infirmary and she had found a small measure of levity to note that she had spent most of her time in Atlantis thus far, in the infirmary.

Sam and John had met in the control room, and both had just stood looking at one another and it was Sam who had suddenly burst out laughing.

John's voice was dry. "I'm hoping you'll share the joke, because 'funny' is a commodity that feels a little out of reach right now."

"Irony John. Elizabeth got out at the right time I'm thinking. She escaped the mission report from hell. How do I write this one up? We're going to have the IOA on our backs quicker than you can blink. After the last month, we're under close scrutiny as it is. I suspect they're going to send their version of 'babysitters' out here for a while, to make sure we don't get ourselves into any more trouble."

John did manage to huff out a bark of laughter. "Yeah, well – good luck with that one. They'll get more than they bargained for. I'm behind on missions as it is – we're backed up for over a month now and I need to get my teams organised within the next day or so. I've put things off long enough while we tried to sort out this dimensional crap."

"Why did you bury your head in the sand so long on this one John... just curious... you've seen what there is to see in this job that we do. There are little surprises left for us, so why the attitude on this one?" Sam leaned against the edge of one of the desks, looking down at the gate room below them, and thinking back briefly over some of the missions that she had been on with SG1. A lifetime ago when she was young and looked at the galaxy with fresh eyes. She knew that one became a little jaded in a job like this, seeing and doing the things that they did was incomprehensible to people back on earth.

"This is going to sound off the wall Sam... I didn't want to see what we could become. The other side of us? When those men stepped through that portal – I thought – 'who will I see?' Usually when we go out on a mission, it's 'what will I see?' - and that is a whole different ball game. Hard to explain Sam - I guess no one ever wants to admit that there is another one of them out there – maybe worse, a bad version... some things are better not to know. I also knew that too much information would change us here... If I didn't accept it, then it didn't need to be. Head in the sand, yeah... it was the only way I could deal with it."

Sam pushed away from the desk now. "Go and get some rest John. I'm going to spend a last night with my General before he heads back to earth tomorrow. We've been apart more than we've been together, but that's how our life goes I guess. Seems to work for us."

"Ever think of marriage Sam? Kids?" John looked at her pensively now.

"Marriage? Not so much. I don't need a piece of paper to know that there's only one man for me. Kids, yeah – we talked about it. There's just so much to do still and if I leave it much longer, that decision will be out of my hands anyway. Perhaps we'll leave it to chance, as you did. So John, a father eh?"

John smiled and Sam watched as his hazel eyes lit up. "Yeah Sam. A father. And I'll make sure I'm a damn side lot better at the job than my old man was. Weird thing is – we know who our child will be – Carlie... but given that I am her father in this dimension, will she be much different than the Carlie we sent back to 1962?"

"Kinda mindboggling, isn't it John. But I think she will be different. Different dimensions allow for different personalities. She'll be yours, that's all you need to know. Go see your woman John, before it gets too late. We'll talk in the morning.

John grabbed two cups of coffee en route to the infirmary and before walking in he found himself stopping suddenly in the doorway. She was not in the bed, but sat at the edge, hands resting lightly on her stomach – a smile on her face. She looked beautiful, blue eyes shining and even amid scrapes, injuries and bandages, John thought that he had never laid eyes on anymore more stunning. She sensed him there and turned her beautiful eyes on him. He had no recollection of moving towards her bed or putting the coffee cups down on the bedside table. No recollection of simply reaching out with two hands to cup her face and bringing his lips down hard onto hers, feeling her pliant and soft beneath him. Even less recollection of picking her up and simply walking out of the infirmary, ignorant to all curious stares that were sent their way.

Only remembered walking into his private quarters with her in his arms and laying her down on the bed. Gently. As though she would break. And smiling as she held out her arms to him and he was lost then, needing only her touch and the feeling of being inside her – hot and tight.

But first he needed to hold her and remind himself that she was still here – with him. And only then could he let his hands roam carefully over her, his touch gentle and soft until she squirmed beneath him, legs moving restlessly as he deliberately chose not to deepen his touch.

"Stop teasing..."

"Just wanna touch you first. Everywhere. So I never forget what your body feels like."

Impatient now, she placed his hand where she needed it the most and heard his chuckle against her shoulder. "I like a woman who knows her own mind... you know Carson's gonna be pissed when he comes back into the infirmary and sees an empty bed..."

"I think Carson will be relieved... I was a little grumpy... until you came... yes, there... like that..."

"Like this...?"

His touch deepened and he laughingly threw one of his legs over hers to still her restless movements. "Torture is a fine art, Gina... and I am particularly skilled at it."

"They teach you this in the military John?"

"They teach us how to extract as much as possible from a prisoner..."

"Am I your prisoner?" She said it teasingly and in an instant her arms were locked above her head and her legs pinned by him with only his mouth as an assault weapon.

"For life..."


	67. Chapter 67 Trouble From Another Quarter

CHAPTER 67 - TROUBLE FROM ANOTHER QUARTER

If peace meant an absence of dimensional rifts, time portals and ripples through both space and time, then it could be said that a measure of peace was found in the two weeks following the closure of the portal on the mainland. John managed to unwrap the cotton wool long enough to leave Gina's side to recommence offworld missions with the rest of his team. As he had already mentioned to Sam, he had a backlog of them to complete and once a routine was established, things fitted together once again like a well oiled wheel. Mostly.

Once Carson was convinced Gina's health was more or less back to normal with the closure of the portal and no longer being in proximity of the device that had been stored in Carlie's stomach, he agreed that she could take on light duties. His lab being the place where he wanted her to start, mainly so that he could keep an eye on her - but she had other ideas. She and Sam had plans to work their way through Rodney's notes and partly conceived ideas and theories. Sam was unable to commit full time as chief scientist as she also had to fulfill her role as base commander and there was a lot of paperwork associated with them. As Sam came to find out in short order.

Mission reports were up to date. Mostly. John had had to spend many a late night in their private quarters, laptop open on the table, shoulders hunched in frustration as he tried to find the words to show what had really happened. Gina would lean over his shoulder and offer suggestions, or reach forward and change his wording from time to time until, the feel of her breath on his neck caused shivers to fan outward and certain parts of his anatomy to show appreciation for her close proximity. And that of course led to other things. Meanwhile the mission reports stayed semi complete until laughingly the next morning, she would shoo him out to whatever planet he was scheduled to visit that day, and sit down at the table with a coffee - rationed these days by the doctor - and finish them for him.

And so two weeks later she snapped his laptop shut one morning, finally completing the last report. Signed off in his name of course. John and his team had left for a mission yesterday afternoon and they were due back later today. This particular mission had necessitated them staying overnight due to particular trading protocols and she had had to argue forcibly with him to get him to go. Stretching now, she yawned and regretted the fact that she was only allowed the one cup of coffee in the mornings. A second one was needed about now, but sighing, she knew better than to cross Carson when he was in one of his moods. And she did acknowledge the fact that little Carlie inside her did not need to be infused with cafeine this early into her life. Time enough for her to develop that habit on her own when she was much much older.

She intended to meet with Sam in the lab after lunch, and needing some exercise she smiled widely when she literally ran into Major Lorne in the hallway out side one of the rec room.

"Just the man I want to see."

She missed the blush that crept up his neck at her comment, putting a smile on his face and putting out his hands to steady her before she overbalanced.

"Hey there! Steady on, you'll be doing some of us damage if you run into us like that."

She laughed. "More likely the other way round Major. Running into you is like tackling a tree trunk." She rubbed her shoulder that had connected with the P90 he had mounted on his tactical vest."

He reached up with hand that had steadied her and gave her shoulder a rub. "Sorry about that. Mind was elsewhere and I didn't expect you to come flying around the corner like that. Why were you looking for me?"

Not quite sure what to do with his hands now, he placed one on his P90. She disconcerted him, his feelings for her had not diminished and he had managed to avoid her for the past couple of weeks as much as he was able - hoping that things would simply die down. Unfortunately, this small amount of contact with her had brought them all rushing back and he ducked his head a little, not wanting her to read the thoughts that were there.

"I need some physical activity..." at this he mentally groaned. Physical activity with her meant touching... and he didn't know, no he most definitely knew... that was not a good idea. "... and I thought we could do some training? John and his team are offworld again and Sam and I have some work to do this afternoon. I could run I guess, or work out with the weights, but Ronon was going to sort out a programme for me and hasn't got around to it yet. I'm technically banned from the gym until I have a safe programme. So Major.. you're it! That is, if you've got the time?" She eyed his tactical vest and weapons. "I suppose you're on your way offworld too."

The dejected look on her face had his smile back. She looked like a puppy in need of a play mate. All soft corners and big sad eyes.

"Just came back Gina, so I'm all yours. Had to fly a team of scientists to P8Y194 and they needed to be there when the sun came up. Didn't quite get the whole technical explanation, but needless to say, it was early to rise, early to finish."

She linked her arm through his and tipped her face up so she could smile at him. "So... babysitting duties? Do they still apply?"

"I guess that one didn't escape you then..." He led her down the hallway intent on taking her to the special outdoor area where they had set up a military obstacle course for training. He could do with the workout himself and a bit of company for a couple of hours would make it that much more pleasant. Especially when company came in this form.

"No Major, it didn't escape my notice. I was barely left alone for a single minute in the day... I believe the term used was 'tag teaming?'". Her soft laughter made him debate again whether this was such a good idea, but the Colonel had given clear instruction that she was to be checked on regularly, and he was one of the roster security personnel. He grimaced recalling the conversation that the Colonel and he had had - not long after the portal was closed. Sheppard had made it clear that if he had any inappropriate thoughts about his woman, then now was the time to come clean and hash it out. Obviously Lorne had been transparent in his feelings and it was at that point that he had resolved to stay away from her - did not need the Colonel breathing down his neck and checking his every movement. So he looked him in the eye and told the Colonel that what he felt for Gina was friendship and nothing more. Lied. But wished more than anything that it was the truth. Life would be easier.

She had not made her pregnancy public knowledge yet - only John and his immediate team knew, along with Sam and Carson, preferring to keep it private until she was showing and it became obvious. Now she eyed the obstacle course that met her eyes as she walked outside, and feeling her pause Lorne looked down at her.

"Not scared of heights I hope?"

"Not usually... but those are rather...high..."

"Don't worry, we'll start off with the lower stuff, then work up - once you're comfortable. Good to see you've got appropriate clothing on." He gaze skimmed down at her tight fitting track pants with lycra mix that while allowing for all range of movement, hugged her thighs a little more tightly than he was comfortable with and when she let go his arm and moved in front of him he was treated to the back view. For this he had to close his eyes and take a couple of calming breaths. Discreetly of course.

He instructed her as to the course procedure, leaving the high ropes out for now. They tended to cause damage to hands if care was not taken and did not want incur the Colonel's wrath if she came away from this injured. He couldn't help it. She had him helpless with laughter when she became tangled in the low ropes, fighting them with as much ferocity as if they were an alien life form and striding through them to try and extricate her, seeing her peeved expression when she saw that he found the whole thing funny, only served to fuel his humour more. By the time he got her through the low ropes and over some of the lower hurdles he felt as though he had almost done the course himself. She gave it her best shot, she really did. Her size did not assist her in any way. Tiny, but determined. Unfortunately this did not get her over the hurdles, hauling herself up so far and collapsing back from where she had just come. When she looked ready to give up,he was behind her, offering her a boost that had her on top of the hurdle looking as though she had scaled Mt Everest. And he felt her sense of triumph as though it were his own.

An hour later she lay sweating and laughing on the floor,having managed only a half of the circuit. He stood over her and reached down a hand, smiling when she took it. He pulled her up effortlessly, the impetus pulling her against him just for a moment, before he quickly released her as though burned. He'd made the decision to stick with friendship,and he'd do his damnedest to honour that decision. But that meant not touching unnecessarily. Althought his hand itched to dust off the area that she was presently dusting - namely her more than delectable derierre that was covered in dust from lying on the ground. But he simply squeezed his fist tightly and took another step back from her, saved by Sam Carter's voice calling out to him as she came down this section of the pier.

_Saved by the Colonel._.. he thought and breathed a sigh of relief. Another crisis averted.

"Colonel? What it is?"

Sam flicked a glance at Gina and mentally groaned. She wanted to speak to Major Lorne privately on a security matter, but knew that there could be potential implications if she did not include her in this conversation. So she made the decision to speak freely in front of them both and got ready for the fall out.

"We've lost communication with Colonel Sheppard and his team. They were scheduled to check in first thing this morning when the trade negotiations were due to take place and they missed that communication. We have attempted to get them online,but no luck so far."

Lorne had snapped to attention and shot a concerned glance at Gina. "Do you want me to put together a team Colonel? Go after them?"

Gina had not made the expected outburst and concerned, Sam looked at her watching how pale her face had become.

"We'll give them another chance to make the second designated call in. If they miss that one,then yes - get a team ready, full gear Major."

"Gina? Best thing to do in these situations is keep busy. Generally they turn out to be nothing but system or equipment malfunction. But we know their last co-ordinates on check in last night - know they made it safely to the planet. Likely, there will be some sort of disturbance that's affecting their radios."

"You've tried a linkup through the gate? Is the gate dialling?" Lorne had begun walking back into the city as they talked, automatically taking Gina's elbow to escort her along. Her skin felt cold and clammy, and alarmed now, he paused and peered down into her face - his hand going automatically to her pulse, the other touching the cool, clammy skin. "Gina? You ok?"

Sam murmured to Lorne. "Get her to the infirmary, get her under Carson's care. Then meet me in the control room. We'll try one more communication then go from there."

Lorne nodded, then slipping a hand down to her waist her kept a tight hold on her as he moved her away and into the city. She stopped, refusing to move and looked back at Sam.

"I want to go with Major Lorne. To get him. I don't want to stay here." The words were said clearly and unemotionally as though she had pushed down all the emotion to make her plea lucid and commanding. Sam immediately shook her head.

"You don't have the training Gina - I'm sorry. The best thing to do is stay here. I can't let you go. You'll be a liability to the rescue team and they'll be having to watch out for you rather than attempting a rescue mission. I can't allow it."

"Gina - do as she says. I don't want to be worrying about you while we're out there. Please? And if Colonel Sheppard finds out, we'll all be feeling his anger." Lorne shot Sam a look and she veered off toward the control room, while Lorne continued down to the infirmary.

They didn't make it to the infirmary. Lorne's radio activated telling him to about face and come immediately to the control room. With Gina. Sam didn't elaborate and he turned off his radio with a glance at Gina. "Damned if I know what that was about, but Colonel Carter did not sound impressed. Control room it is. You up for this? You're still pale and I didn't like the way your pulse was racing along back there... I should really take you to Carson first, but orders are orders. Come on, let's go see what the game plan is."

He had taken her arm again and felt her quick glances at him, but he had his military face on now and the laughing Major from earlier was gone.

Sam was pacing in the control room when they arrived, and she had been joined by Zalenka and two IOA officials who had just arrived through the gate not an hour earlier. Their official babysitters. Just what Sam needed and if the look on her face was anything to go by, they were not going to have the most pleasant introduction to Atlantis. She was certainly not in the mood for them.

"Change of plan Colonel?" Lorne was brisk now, ignoring the IOA men, focused on his commanding officer.

"We've just had communication Major. From the planet where Colonel Sheppard and his team are. They're being held captive. Seems it's not over."

"Sam?" Gina's voice was small. "What do you mean?"

"The men holding them captive Gina. Are from the dimension where Carlie came from. We may have closed our portal, but they have found another. And somehow - either by design or by coincidence - they have managed to capture Colonel Sheppard and his team by appearing to be the very traders that they had a meeting with this morning. It seems they still only want one thing. You, Gina. They're willing to trade the Colonel and his team - for you."

Gina sagged slightly and with a will pulled herself upright, and away from Lorne's supporting arm. She turned and faced them in the room - Lorne, Sam, Zalenka and the IOA men who stood watching her curiously - the same ones who had been to Atlantis a lifetime ago...

"This was supposed to be over. We got Carlie out safely. We closed the portal. It was supposed to be over! What happened?"

"We don't know the full story Gina, I'm sorry. We can only assume that they are the same group - they asked specifically for you and mentioned Carlie by name. They've not only threatened the Colonel - they know how to get back to 1962. They've given us 24 hours to get you there, then they will kill the Colonel and go back to 1962. To destroy the very things that we have put into place to ensure that there is a stargate programme. And I don't know if Callandra and your father can stop them this time."

Gina's eyes were cold.

"Then I will."


	68. Chapter 68 Into the Fray

CHAPTER 68 – INTO THE FRAY

She had lost her cool after that and anger coloured her face as she left the room, looking neither left nor right – just needing to get away from their sympathetic eyes and measured stares. Away somewhere – where she could shut her eyes for a moment and conjure up John's face. It was this image that would keep her focused, keep her anger on track. For she needed that anger to get her through what she needed to do.

Stop these bastards once and for all. They had let them make the plays – over and over. Each move had been orchestrated. From their side. Now the other side was calling dibs. _Was not going to happen_ Gina fumed. _Do they have any idea what crap we just went through to get to where we are now? They play with their stupid machines and create their own portals. So they can come through to the dimension and take MY baby. Then they decide they want it all. Go back to MY timeline and destroy everything that the ancients carefully frabricated to make sure that we are achieving the very best that we can achieve. Not gonna happen. Not on my watch!_

Furious now, she didn't hear Major Lorne come up behind her. Walked faster until she thought she could walk away from the very thoughts that threatened to overwhelm her. Then felt his hand, feather light in spite of the furious motion she spurred herself on to and it was his touch that was her undoing.

"Don't touch me Major – not now. I need to focus, need to channel this damn anger into something that will work. Leave me..."

"Can't do that Gina – sorry. I'm not leaving you on your own to beat yourself up about this. And the game plan? Not yours to make... I'm taking command of the team that goes in to rescue them, I make the call and I make the decisions. Not you."

His hand had crept up and rested behind her neck and he saw the fury drop like a cloak from her face as it crumpled in fear now and without thought, he pulled her toward him, wrapping his arms around her as he felt her shudder.

"Shhh, we'll get him back. I promise. We don't leave anyone behind. Your man taught me that from the get go. I'll get my team together and those bastards – they won't know what hit them."

He dropped his face into her hair and felt her clutch his shirt in her hands, restless and unsure. When she lifted her face to him, it was all he could do not to kiss her, and cursed himself black and blue for his insensitivity and bad timing. And inappropriate feelings.

"You're taking me with you... I'm the one they want – you'll need to use me for bait if nothing else. No arguments Major, none... if you try to leave me behind, I'll just find another way to get there. You really don't want to cross me when I'm pissed!"

Unbidden, a small smile came to his face as he looked down into her determined one. "Yeah Gina, I got that from day one. He's a lucky guy to have you in his corner." She caught sight of the wistful look in his eyes and stared back at him assessingly.

"He'd do the same for me Major – for any of us..."

"I know Gina – but for you? He'd die a thousand deaths to keep you safe. And my life will be worth nothing if I use you for bait."

"Major Lorne?" Sam had come up behind them, standing back and watching their interaction with some curiousity. "We don't have a choice. She'll have to go with you. There can be no chance that they even attempt to get back to 1962. That does not only destroy a team – that will have implications beyond anything we can comprehend. Our whole timeline will be altered and there's a very real possibility that we will cease to exist. If they've done their homework. Gina is right. We have no choice but to stop them. And the only way we can do that is to set a trap. The only bait we have that is even remotely attractive to them? You're looking at her..."

Sam saw the look of gratitude on Gina's face and the look of anger that quickly gave way to resoluteness on the Major's. She did not envy him. She had seen the way he looked at Gina and seen the way also, that he was very careful to shutter it and keep his feelings private. Unrequited love was cruel and knew that given his feelings he would much rather have her here safe and sound. But that was not going to happen.

"Major – we have 24 hours. That gives us a couple of hours to come up with a game plan – a good one. I know that Colonel Sheppard usually takes the lead on these, but for now – it's you and I Major,and if you have anything helpful to input Gina, we would appreciate your thoughts. Major – organise your teams to get themselves prepared – we need as much manpower as you can round up, then the three of us will sit down and knock out a working plan. We'll bring them home, and protect what is ours. Agreed?"

"Without a doubt Sam."

"Go with Major Lorne and gear up Gina."

She gave Sam a look then abruptly turned and followed Lorne who strode quickly down the hallway. He did not speak or look at her until they reached the gear room. He had been onto his radio immediately and teams had started to organise themselves even before they reached the gear room and he was kept busy sorting out weapons and ensuring that maximum firepower would be used. They had no idea what to expect.

Finally he turned to her and his expression, which had been almost fierce – softened. "You know my position in all this, but I'll keep you safe. You have my word. Full gear Gina, as uncomfortable as it may seem, I want you covered from head to toe and you'll follow my orders out in the field. I need to know that you'll do that, or I can't protect you. Do you understand that?"

She nodded, choosing not to speak so that she did not need to lie to her friend. She fully intended to follow his orders, if they corresponded with what she needed to do. If not? Then she would follow her own instincts and face his anger once it was all over.

He helped her on with her vest and secured it tightly so that she had to take short small breaths until he found a fastening he was happy with. He handed her the beretta and watched as she secured it in her leg holster, then handed her a P90. "I want you to take this one as well. It fires a volley of bullets and will do more damage than the beretta. Hold it up against your shoulder like this..." He moved behind her, showed her how to hold it and said quietly against her hair. "... it has a kick once you fire, be prepared for it and brace your feet into the ground and keep the grip strong." He felt her nod and stepped away from her to the front, taking the weapon and securing it to the top of her tactical vest. He then tipped her face up and looked down into the resolve he saw gathering there.

"He's a lucky man Gina. If he ever does you wrong, come and see me...he's not the only one who would die a thousand deaths for you..." He quickly dropped her chin and shuttered his eyes and she was left shaking her head slightly, wondering if she had heard his words correctly. Then decided it was best to say nothing at all.

They met back in the control room. Four teams of marines waited in the gate room, geared up and ready to go. Their Colonel needed their help and they had a city to protect, as well as their own timeline. Their own existence.

"Have we had another communication from them Colonel?"

"No Major. What I managed to piece together from the first communication was this. They have secured the stargate. It appears they are not holding John and his team near the gate. When I asked for proof that they were alive, they switched to another visual communication device and it was inside a building. Large, cavernous with concrete type walls – looked to be a warehouse of some sort. The three of them are tied up and shackled into small cages on the floor of the warehouse. Separately, so there seems to be no chance of them springing themselves out."

"Sam? The portal. The time and dimensional portal – any idea where on the planet that it is."

Sam pulled up the planet terrain from the database and brought it into 3D visual on the control screen. Using the touch screen she moved slowly around the terrain of the planet, looking for likely areas where the portal could be.

"There will likely be an energy signature. We know now that have been using particle accelerators to make these artificial rifts and there will be a residual energy pattern that will allow us to trace it once we are on the ground. I have here..." she held up several small boxes that fit comfortably into the palm of her hand. "... portable detectors. I have configured these so that they can pick up both life signs and electrical signatures. I have preprogrammed into here, the likely signature you will be looking for so you can make your way through different areas of the planet. It is likely that the rift is in a fairly protected area, but will not be too far from the main population. We know they don't have ships, so wherever the portal is, will need to be within walking distance."

"Ok Colonel. That gives us a starting point. I have some suggestions from there. I want to send a MALP in with rigged weaponry, set to fire the moment we stabilise cameras and ascertain that the gate is secured by unfriendlies. Take out the guards surrounding the gate, send the first team in to secure the perimeter. When we have the all clear, team two needs to go in immediately with team three and they will both begin moving through the populated areas looking for the signature. Gina and I will go in with team four. They and myself, will be with her at all times. Gina?" He waited until she had acknowledged him. "That is not negotiable – understand?"

Her eyes clouded slightly and shifted away from him, but she nodded. And he shook his head slightly, feeling unreassured that she would listen to him once they arrived. Thought briefly of bringing an extra set of handcuffs to make sure she was secured to him at all times.

"We are team four. Our responsibility is to find Sheppard and his team and get them out. That is the first plan, and we hope it is the only one we will have to use. Terminal force for all members of the other dimension and once everyone is secured, we bring in the EMP weapon with the ZPM and close this portal as well. But not before we send a message through. They will not open up another one. This message needs to be loud and clear. That, is not negotiable, either."

Gina's voice was quiet. "What about a backup plan Major? If this one falls to pieces?"

"If we get captured and can't protect you?" Lorne's eyes were soft now as he looked at her.

She nodded. "What do you want me to do?"

"Pat your two top pockets..."

She did as he asked and found some square pieces of putty like substance, gray and seemingly innocuous. "What is this?"

"C4. If plan A goes south, plan B... go with with them to the portal. You'll have to protect yourself from there on in Gina and I think you've got the guts to do it. Look for an opening, any opening – and take it. You only need one shot. This Gina..." he pointed to the C4. "... this is your final resort. Find somewhere to put this, where the most damage will be done and take the opening. Then hide. We'll find you. We'll move heaven and earth to get there and find you. This C4 just evens the battle field for us a little. I'll show you how to activate it."

He gave her a quick lesson in using the explosive and put it back into her vest pocket, ensuring that the pockets were securely closed. He kept her at his side, casting glances at her. Today she would become a soldier and fight for her man and her right to exist – if he'd known about the baby she carried, it was likely his game plan may have been a little different and as she met his eyes squarely she was pleased that she had made the decision to keep her news to herself for now. Lorne didn't need anything further clouding his judgement.

"Ok teams – Gina. Move on down to the gate room and be ready to go in ten minutes. The MALP will go through first and I want visual at all times until the perimeter is secured." Sam turned to the technicians in the control room. "Got that people? Visual at all times. We'll keep the gate open for the full 38 minutes, no shutting it down unless it becomes a security issue. We need that visual. Go Major, get your teams sorted in the gate room and be safe, all of you. Gina – a word please before you go?"

Lorne shot her a look then moved down to the gate room where he organised his teams, shooting curious glances up at the control room where Sam talked quietly in a corner with Gina.

"Are you feeling ok Gina – the baby?"

"... is fine Sam. Really. And will be even better when she gets her daddy home..."

"You know that John is going to be all shades of angry when he sees you arrive? Just be prepared for the fall out. I know the way his mind works and he won't like the fact that you've gone in to do battle for him. Let Lorne protect you – the man is nuts about you by the way..." Sam smiled at that, hoping to make the younger woman see where his feelings lay so that she could be careful to not encourage him.

"Major Lorne? He's become a good friend Sam – I know he feels a little more than he should, but I think he's pushed those feelings carefully away, and chosen friendship over nothing at all."

"I hope you're right Gina – for all your sakes. He'll watch your back out there, he doesn't know about the baby?"

"No, best not to complicate things further right now. If he thinks he has two to protect, that puts more pressure on him – let him do his job and we'll all get through this fine." Gina turned and moved out of the control room with Sam following. As they arrived in the gate room, Gina noticed another device being moved into place, similar to the EMP pulse and looked in question at Sam.

"This is our insurance Gina. A naquita powered bomb – more powerful than a nuclear explosion. This goes through the portal to the other side – once everyone is safe. This sends a message through to them – they're not to attempt to come back here."

Gina shot troubled eyes to Sam. "Are you sure that's wise Sam? Far be it from me to question military tactics, but sending a bomb through? It's been done before... Hiroshima? And look what happened there. We should be learning from our past mistakes, not compounding them."

Gina missed the small smile that Lorne tried to hide, but Sam caught it and grimaced. "Out of the mouths... eh Major?"

Sam turned to Gina. "This is a front line Gina – rules of engagement apply here. They have essentially attacked our world and our very existence. We can't allow a threat like that to go unpunished and the only way is to send a very clear message through. Yes, we may kill innocent people, but it is war Gina – and there are casualties in war."

Gina turned abruptly and looked around as though searching for something. She found the two IOA men standing quietly near the back of the gate room. They had said nothing, and now she strode over to them, all sparking blue eyes and Sam caught Lorne's eye in alarm.

"Why are you here?"

The smaller of the two men started in surprise and looked quickly at his counterpart before answering her.

"For the very reasons that you just stated. Our role in this galaxy was to be of observer only – and so far the earth personnel have managed to stir up more than just a hornets nest. We are here to stop a galaxy war from breaking out – from wreaking havok through a galaxy that is not ours. We are supposed to be the ones who lay down the boundaries and set the rules. So far, this is spiralling out of control and our control, is limited to reporting on what we see and taking back recommendations to earth."

"And what will your recommendation be after this has gone down? Shut the programme down? Get out of dodge?"

"If necessary. If we feel that you have all overstepped your bounds. We also question your right to be here. This wouldn't be happening if you weren't here – you're the one they want."

"If I wasn't here – then neither would the stargate programme..." she turned then and whirled away and caught only his quiet comment which had her faltering. "That may not be such a bad thing.."

...and the implications of that opened up a whole new can of worms...


	69. Chapter 69 Protect and Serve

CHAPTER 69 – PROTECT AND SERVE

Everyone seemed to have forgotten one very important thing. Gina had never experienced gate travel before. Compounded with the fact that she was almost three months pregnant – her arrival on the other side had her sitting down suddenly and leaning over to retch. Lorne was at her side in seconds, cursing himself that he had forgotten what that first trip through was like. One took it for granted and it was a traumatic experience that was more intense than the world's fastest rollercoaster, leaving you breathless, freezing and nauseous on the other side. Of course, your body quickly adjusted to it over time, but that first time? Lorne could still recall it, and was crouched beside her, hand at her back and pulling out a cloth to wipe her face.

"Aah hell, Gina – I'm sorry – I should have remembered that you hadn't done this before. Kinda takes the breath away, huh?"

She leaned into him, grateful for his support and let him help her up. They surveyed the area surrounding the stargate where several bodies lay. The MALP had successfully gone through first and after visual had established that it was indeed guarded by unfriendlies, they had remotely activated the firing mechanism and the guards around the gate had been gunned down instantly. Gina pushed the feeling of distaste from her mouth, and the residual taste of the nausea that had just plagued her. She took a swig of the water that Lorne handed her and pushed the cloth into one of her pockets.

"Feeling better?" He looked down at her, after ensuring that there was no further threat around the gate. Teams two and three had already gone through and were searching for the portal, as per his plan. They could wait here for a few minutes to receive updates from them, then their job was to locate Colonel Sheppard and his team. Lorne wanted to wait until Gina had full equilibrium back, then they would move out.

"Yeah, thanks Major. Just needed a moment. Don't know that I particularly enjoyed that little trip. I'll take your word that it gets better, and perhaps I won't have to put it to the test too much."

"Unfortunately it's the way back to earth, and most of our offworld excursions. We use the jumpers from time to time, but if you're going to eventually join one of the teams here, then gate travel is a part of your life."

"Super..." Her dry humour had him chuckling and he gave the sign for his team to move out. He kept her close beside him, the rest of team four fanned out around them, keeping both Lorne and Gina as their centre. Protecting her. They kept close to the buildings as they entered the city and as they arrived on the outskirts, Lorne indicated to his team that they needed to stand down for a moment and regroup. Leaning against the wall, Gina tipped her face up to the weak sun that shone through and briefly thought about her beloved island, where the sun was always hot. She had felt more or less constantly cold since her arrival in Atlantis, and wondered if she would ever see her old home again. Then quickly pushed that unwelcome thought away. This was her new home now – and she had a new life. A new family.

Lorne radioed teams two and three to check on their progress and kept throwing concerned glances at Gina. He had seen the play of emotions on her face and knew what sort of direction they would be taking. A lot happening inside her, he knew that and wished that he could give her back a little of her equilibrium. One friend to another. She sensed him looking at her and saw the question in his look and smiled. Leaned into him. One friend to another. They would be ok.

Lorne received radio confirmation back from teams two and three. So far no sign of the portal and there was still a lot of ground to cover in under 18 hours. Sam had told them that the arranged handover point was the stargate at 0900 hours the next morning. Lorne had assumed this meant that the portal was near the gate. There was no way that they would risk dragging Gina a long distance, knowing that it was likely she would have people coming after her within a short time. Using this premise, Lorne had instructed teams two and three to begin their search from the gate, one team taking the eastern path and the other the western. If nothing registered in either of those directions within a two click radius, then they were to regroup at the gate and take northern and southern paths beyond the gate.

He turned now to address his team, Gina leaning comfortably against him, face still tipped slightly to take in the weak sun. He brushed his hand against hers and felt the chill there, unsure whether her cold came from within or just the fact that there was little warmth from the sun. He hoped it was the latter.

"Ok team. No good news yet from those searching for the portal. We have to proceed with finding the Colonel and his team. This city is larger than we thought and it will take some time to locate the building where they are being held. Remember, you're looking for a large structure, likely resembling a warehouse of some sort. It will be guarded and heavily. Given what we did to them back on the mainland, they'll not be such easy targets this time. Be vigilant. Priority? Get the Colonel and his team out, terminal force required for unfriendlies. Also a priority? Gina is to be kept close at all times, do not allow them an opening to get to her. Bait yes, but protected bait. Am I clear on that one?" He received confirmation from his team and giving her hand a reassuring squeeze, he pushed away from the wall and the warmth he was giving her and took the lead.

They attracted many curious glances from the city residents and knowing that they were likely dressed in similar attire to the men who were now holding their fellow team members hostage, this at least afforded them some measure of invisibility. At one point Lorne pulled Gina behind him, and back up into an open door, gesturing for his men to do the same. They melted into the shadows,black combat gear dissolving once out of the light and Gina felt her heart racing. Lorne felt it also, she was pressed up against his back and he reached behind with a hand to calm her and he murmured softly. "Some of their soldiers, coming in from our left flank. Shhh.. let them go past us. We'll follow them." He did not need words with his men - a series of hand signals to them and they immediately knew what was going down.

"You think they'll lead us to John?" He voice was hopeful and breathed softly into his ear.

He turned his face slightly and his cheek rubbed against hers and if he'd been any other sort of man he could have moved a millimeter more and his lips would have been on hers. But he was not that man. And was able to breathe normally and reply to her in a soft voice. "That's what I'm hoping Gina. At some point we'll meet up with a group of them who are either going or returning from wherever they're being held. I hope that it's the former."

They waited in the shadows, unmoving and silent as the men went past. There were four of them and Lorne knew he could have stepped out right now with his team of six and taken them down immediately. Simply raised his P90 and opened fire. It would have been open and shut - easy. But they needed to get to the Colonel, and for now, these men were both the link to where they were being held, and in all likelihood, would provide a clue as to where the portal was. Lorne briefly debated leaving Gina here, tucked away securely in the shadows so that he and his men could move with stealth after them. But knew the consequences of leaving her anywhere unguarded. If she was captured they would take her immediately through the portal and it would become next to impossible to get her back. No, he would take her with them, keeping her as close as he could and hoped that her stealth capabilities were a little higher than those she displayed on the obstacle course. And pushed back a smile as her ferocious expression as she became entangled in the low ropes rose into his mind.

They eased their way after the men, Gina keeping tight behind Lorne and he acknowledged that she did indeed possess suitable stealth capabilities. She was small and light and walked quietly with little disturbance in the air as she moved. And he was certainly aware of her pressed up tightly against him, so that their movements became almost one. He halted his group when the men they were following appeared to slow their pace, and melted into a recess between buildings, Gina pushed back behind Lorne still. They had pulled something out of their pockets and they were talking and gesturing in a direction to their right and after much discussion, which Lorne unfortunately could not hear due to their low tones, they turned to their right and Lorne quickly gestured for his group to follow.

By the time they had gotten to the end of that street the men had disappeared, and Lorne thought quickly. They must have gone inside a building, and doing a quick reconnaissance, found that there was indeed a large structure to their right, that looked to be some sort of warehouse.

A series of hand signals and they huddled together, ducking behind a large rubbish receptacle for cover. "I see two entrances to the building. We know that four men have entered and their are likely more in their guarding the Colonel. We are six, three will take the door to the east and my team will take the west. Colonel Carter's intel shows them being held in small cages in the centre of the room. We'll provide a distraction in order to hit both doors at once."

Lorne pulled out two packets of C4,and handing one to one of his men, he kept the other and the two of them quickly set the fuses. He left Gina with the men, and they took the C4, placed them in the doorway and ran back to their cover, detonated the C4 and waited for the explosion. Everything happened at once after that. Lorne had his men move simultaneously with the explosions and they were through the doors, weapons up and ready to fire, gunning down four men before the smoke from the explosion had even had a chance to settle. Gina had hung back when they started to move. She had brought her own P90 up ready, intent on using it just as Lorne had shown her, but decided to let the dust settle a little before she went in. She counted to ten, then moved in quietly through the closer door.

There was still smoke swirling ominously around the warehouse. She heard men coughing and someone was moaning on the ground to her left. She moved that way quickly, just in case it was one of their own men and when she saw that it wasn't she moved further into the room, following the sounds of weapon fire and shouting. When the smoke finally cleared she saw that Lorne had managed to secure the room and was in the process of opening the cages on the floor. She met the angry glare of the man in the centre cage and she knew immediately that he was furious that she was here.

"What the hell are you doing here. What was Sam thinking? Lorne - what were you thinking? Dammit Gina, these bastards are after you, and you get brought here like bait? Jesus, Lorne - get me outta here now!"

His angry roar brought a tight smile to Lorne's face and he answered dryly. "Just about to do that Sir!"

He used his beretta to fire a close range round at each lock and by the time the three were out of their cages, John's temper had escalated to volcanic proportions.

"Gina, damnit - I want to speak to you - now!"

Lorne looked around, as did Ronon and Teyla. They had seen Gina standing more or less in front of the cages. Some residual smoke still lingered, but they did not see her in the room and Lorne, panicking a little now moved to the corners of the room to make sure she had not taken refuge there for any reason.

"Gina?" John heard the panic is the Major's voice and his own anger vanished immediately to be replaced by something else. Fear.

Seems like the rat had taken the bait.


	70. Chapter 70 A Portal Too Far

CHAPTER 70 - A PORTAL TOO FAR

She coughed a little in the swirling smoke, watching as Lorne used his weapon at close range to quickly free the three from their cells. Then felt cold hands reach for her from behind and there was a sense of darkness and disorientation and something was placed over her nose and mouth and she felt herself lifted. She panicked, fearing suffocation and couldn't cry out, her legs kicking against flesh as a voice growled in her ear. "Stay still or I will hurt you."

Her fear increased, she knew that she had been captured by the very people she had been trying to avoid and in a full panic now, she redoubled her efforts to escape, kicking and clawing, causing her captor to issue low curses directly into her ear. She felt him reach beneath her for something and briefly wondered how he had gotten her out without someone seeing them. The smoke had been in the process of disipating and would not have provided sufficient cover to hide what had just occurred. Her muffled cries could barely be heard and she felt the terrain change beneath the person who was holding her. No longer solid, it had a more cushioned feel, and her last thought before she felt the sharp prick of a needle into her thigh was that they were now on grass, no longer in the city. Then thought left as the darkness spiralled up, the effects of the drug he had given her racing through her system.

He met with others near the portal. It had not been found yet by the Lantiens, however their search grid would locate this area soon and they needed to get her back to their dimension. Where she would be safe.

"Looks like she put up a fight?" One of the men had a wry smile on his face, reaching into his pocket to take out a small communicator and activating it.

"Not much to her, but she's got a lot of fight in her. I'd like a shot at taming this one. She's easy on the eye."

"Hands off Lan, she's here for one purpose only. The child. After that, take your best shot at convincing her that you're not the bastard you really are. If she falls for it, she's not as intelligent as they claim she is."

The one named Lan had taken the cover from her face and he looked down into her face, running a finger down her cheek to move some of her hair aside. "Perhaps I will. More than a little easy on the eye actually, and I like her fiesty nature... makes you think where else she'll show that much fight!"

"One track mind..." murmured one of the other men, and shooting a disgusted look at Lan, he stepped through into what appeared to be thin air, the only outward disturbance being a shimmer that looked like a mirage. One by one they all stepped through and the doorway to their universe disappeared from view, as though it had never existed.

It could have been a mirror image and from where they had just come – with small differences, almost like one of those 'spot the difference' games. The man holding Gina strode beyond the portal on the other side and took her to a building where a room had been especially set up. It was a bedroom of sorts, with a small bathroom type facility as an ensuite. The room however, had no door - it was protected by an electrical barrier that used the same particle accelerator device to power it. If someone tried to pass through while it was activated, they would receive more than just a nasty shock. They would immediately be rendered unconscious. Lan placed her still form on the bed, and with a token gesture of thoughtfulness, opened up one of the blankets folded neatly at the end, and lay it over her.

Two other men and one woman stepped in. The woman looked for all intents and purposes, like Samantha Carter, and was likely her equivalent in this dimension. She wore medical attire and now sat down at the edge of the bed and took Gina's pulse, then pulling out other instruments to check for her other vital signs. Lastly she placed a small hand held device on Gina's stomach, calling up a 3D image into the air in front of her, much like a hologram and the others watched in fascination as the visual from her womb became clear. A tiny, barely formed child. The woman sighed in relief.

"She is perfect. I will remove a fragment for gene testing and we will verify that she does in fact carry the required gene. This is wonderful gentleman. This will be the salvation on our race. With genetic purity we can become what we once were. Many thousands of years ago."

One of the other man, with arrogant features and a cruel mouth spoke. "We should have brought the man here as well. Colonel Sheppard. He holds the ancient gene of a strength that is uncommon in most humans. We could have taken samples of attempted to work with that."

"Our success rate for organic reproduction of the gene has been non existent Gil - you know this. I doubt it would make any difference even if we had samples from a stronger gene. We have yet to perfect the process. This is the easier way. Here we have a live child, one who carries not only the gene of the man, but genes of an ascended ancient. This is pure strength and cannot be copied in any way, synthetic or organic."

The Sam lookalike worked exclusively with microbiotics and the delicate research required to bring their technology levels to a stage where they had been successful in developing a time/dimension portal and the means to create rifts whenever and wherever they were needed. "I will take the samples I need while she is still under the sedative, then we can verify the strength of the gene."

She rose and left the room, leaving the three men looking down at Gina curiously.

"They'll come after her - and soon. We need to be ready. The leader, Colonel Sheppard? He will not take kindly to us removing the woman from their dimension and I can well understand that there will be bloodlust in his eyes about now. He will show no mercy."

Lan was derisive. "They need to find how to get through first. We've disguised the portal well and it won't be an easy task. We'll be ready for them if they do."

The third man who had not yet spoken turned and looked out the window, down into the courtyard outside. "Arrogance Lan - it will be your downfall. Don't underestimate the Lantien's. We have one of their own and they appear to be a formidable group. Best you concern yourself about security and leave the medical side of things to the others. This woman is not for you Lan - out of your league my friend. You'll not lay a hand on her."

His glance was dark and he had both Gil and Lan backing up and out of the room. His role in this dimension was also medical and he found the arrogance of some of the security detail appalling. He stood looking down at Gina and there was a measure of sympathy in his eyes. He had not wanted it to come to this and wished that there had been another way. He had been overruled. Their government had insisted that this was the only way to get the required gene. He closed his eyes and thought briefly of Carlie and wondered if she was safe. They had become somewhat close in the two years that he had been working with her, and if it had been allowed, he would have formalised their relationship and become her father. Their methods of experimentation could be cruel and he did his best to ensure that the children, were not harmed unnneccesarily and given a reasonable quality of life. It was only the orphan children who were used, rather than send them to orphanages their government had decreed that they would be kept in a facility for experimentation. He sat down on the bed now and smoothed a hand across her brow, feeling her cool skin and watched her eyelids flicker slightly, wondering what thoughts were going through her head right now.

He was about to find out. Abruptly he found himself staring into a pair of vivid blue eyes, wide and distrustful. He pulled his hand away quickly and schooled his features into an impassive mask.

"Gina. The sedative wore off earlier than we expected. Do you suffer any ill effects from it - nausea perhaps? I will get you some water and perhaps some food." He rose from the bed and she must have seen something in his eyes. She recognised the same compassion that filled the eyes of their own Doctor Beckett and a small fissure of hope shot through her that perhaps he shared the same traits. She reached out a hand, latching onto his wrist and her own eyes were pleading.

"Please. Let me out of here. I don't belong here, neither does my child. I sense you are a little different than the others.. compassionate."

"I am the medical assistant here. Doctor Beckett – however I suspect you already know this – I see the recognition in your eyes. Perhaps I am not so different from where you come from. It will be my duty to ensure you remain in good health while you are here. We don't wish to hurt you, or the child. We just need the gene - please, you have to understand that."

"They will come for me. You know that ."

"I hope for your sake that they don't. Our security forces are ready for them and it would be best if they stayed on their side of the portal." Doctor Beckett went to rise from the bed again, pulling gently out of her grasp. Samantha walked in then, with a small sample kit and a long needled hypodermic. She looked surprised to see that Gina was awake.

"Carson. Get some more sedative for the woman. We cannot take the sample if she is awake and aware. We cannot risk her doing damage to herself and the child if she resists." The woman glanced assessingly at Gina, before speaking to her. "If you attempt to struggle it will only be at your detriment. I would suggest allowing me to complete this task and no one needs to get hurt. Agreed?"

Gina eyed the needle, fear not for herself but her unborn child. "What do you intend to do with that?"

"Gene sampling from the child. We need to ensure that it is indeed a pure strain. We'll sedate you so you don't feel a thing. It is not intrusive or harmful in any way to the child."

Gina started to struggle now. "Get that thing away from me!" She pushed herself up off the bed and launched herself at the woman, knocking the injection out of her hand and ramming the hard part of her head under the woman's chin, just as Ronan had shown her. The woman grunted in pain, and the injection went flying along with the woman, who landed on her backside rather hard on the floor. Gina pushed past her, barely giving her a glance and went to leave the room. They had not activated the energy field while the medical staff were in and out, and while she had been sedated, and now she slipped through quickly, feeling the lethargic tug from the sedative pull at her limbs seductively.

She made it clear of the building and once outside looked around disorientated and feeling very much alone. It was a foreign place, the city while similar in design to the one she had just been in, more no recognisable markings and she had no idea of direction. The sun was not a good place to pinpoint direction from as she had no idea which way it rose in this particular world, let alone dimension. Intent on simply getting out of the city and towards a sheltered area so that she could rest and get her bearings, she headed down a dark alleyway, now fighting for the life of herself and her child.


	71. Chapter 71 Same Song Different Tune

CHAPTER 71 – SAME SONG DIFFERENT TUNE

She ran without knowing which way would lead her to the portal, or the stargate. Although if she had gotten to their version of the stargate, she would have had no clue how to use it, nor understood whether it was even in use in this dimension. So she ran, at an one point she simply fell to the ground, exhausted and lost and just lay still. Lay on her back and looked up to the sky feeling as though it might as well come crashing down on her now. She didn't have much else to lose.

_Except your baby... that is what you have to live for.. you baby. Maybe they'll find you, likely they won't. Major Lorne pretty much told you if you got to this side, you were on your own. Well kiddo, deal with it... not much else you can do._

The she heard the sound of heavy breathing and didn't have the strength to push herself up to run further. So she just lay there and shut her eyes and cried.

"Gina... please don't cry. I want to help you. Please."

She knew the voice, and pictured his face. The kindly doctor, the only one who looked as though there would be any compassion. Doctor Carson Beckett.

She forced her eyes open and saw that he was crouched down beside her, his face and eyes kind. She saw no sign of anger and pushed herself up, feeling his hand reach behind her back and hold her upright. He dropped down onto the ground beside her and kept his arm around her back.

"I just want to go back. Please."

"I didn't want to do this Gina. Please understand our reasons – right or wrong in your eyes, we only had the best intentions. Tell me about myself in your world? Am I very different?"

A small smile came to her face and she didn't want to feel any connection with this man from another dimension, but there was something familiar about him, and she thought that perhaps a small part of their Carson, resided in this Carson also.

"Maybe not so different... he is a doctor also, and an extremely good one. Kind, very gentle with patients, but has a streak of pure steel if you go against his better judgement. Samantha Carter? She is the chief medical person here?"

At his nod and pensive look, she quantified. "In our world she is the base commander, and a different kind of scientist. Physics is her specialty. She designed the weapon that can close the portal."

"And our Samantha Carter designed the weapon that opened it. Maybe not so different."

She took at breath and asked him. "And John Sheppard? Is he still here is this dimension? Alive? I only know from Carlie that her mother and father were gone. I understood that they were likely dead?"

He lowered his eyes. "They died in an accident when Carlie was only about a year old. John Sheppard was a good friend of mine – I still miss him. He was not in the military as he is in your world, but the commander of Atlantis. A diplomat, if you will..."

"Were they intending to take me back to their Atlantis Dr Beckett? What are their plans?" He had pushed up to his feet now and offered a hand down to give her assistance to get to her feet, keeping his hand at her waist to support her.

"They were to keep you here on this planet for the next two days – if your team had come through during this time, then they would have killed them. Then you would have been moved to Atlantis. The portal there is not accessible therefore we need to be on another world in order to access your dimension."

He turned her to face him now. "Please... tell me how Carlie is? I miss her..."

"She was like a daughter to you, wasn't she. That's why she had some happy memories of this place and was in good health. You are responsible for that, aren't you?"

"I wanted her to become my daughter. I had grown attached to her. Where is she?"

"The only way she could exist in our dimension was to send her back in time. My father, an ascended being and my aunt, took her back to 1962 to be with her real father."

Carsons' eyes sharpened at this news. "John Sheppard is not the father?"

"Of your Carlie.. long story Dr Beckett. This child... "she touched her stomach. "Is most definitely John's child. There are differences between our world and yours but the same thread seems to run through. John and I were together, and I think for all intents and purposes, Carlie was his child. Just not by blood."

"Come Gina – we shall try and get to the portal. I am going to help you get home. You do not belong here, neither does your child. Carlie deserves the chance to have a proper family. I failed the one in this dimension. I won't fail another."

She leaned into him and hugged him.. "You're a good man Dr Beckett – in both worlds, and I would wager in all worlds. It is your nature and even dimensional shifts and discrepancies cannot dilute that."

They moved quickly now and Gina let Carson lead her towards the portal. She was exhausted and would need to rest soon, but Carson pushed her on, needing to get her through before they were discovered.

They heard shouting, then the click of weapons and Gina shut her eyes and swayed against Carson.

"Let get go Beckett. Let her go and stand back from her and you won't get hurt."

The voice was like whiplash, but she knew it and he eyes sprung open in hope. Standing in front of her was John, Major Lorne, Ronon and Teyla and she swayed now, unsure whether they were real or another version of real. She no longer knew. Only knew that Carson let her go and she screamed out to John not to shoot... that he was helping her. Major Lorne saw something in her eyes, and saw something pass between her and Carson Beckett – the other Carson Beckett and put his hand up to indicate to the others not to fire.

John knew only one thing. Get to Gina. This time he would not fail her. This was time he would be the man, not the soldier and without a look at the others, they immediately understood and allowed him to rush forward and and catch her before she fell into the darkness and became lost. He held her tightly against him, and he felt that she struggled to stay upright and to stay conscious. His face had dropped to her hair and he breathed in her scent, familiar and right and closed his eyes and simply held her. He felt the moment that her legs simply gave way and slid down to the ground with her, rather than pick her up. He did not know if he had the strength right now to do more than simply sit here and hold her against him.

The past two hours had been pure hell. He had erupted out of the cage like a furious bear, all anger, energy and something else. Hot blooded male. The soldier was there and it was this part of him that was able to pull something approaching reason down over the hot coals that fanned the fire inside him, was able to get his team together and Lorne's and give clear instruction on just what they were going to do. Go through that damn portal and bring back his woman.

But it was the man that drove him to the portal. It was the man that pictured his family captured and held and knew what their intentions for her were – knew that they would perform tests on the child and perhaps once they had what they wanted, they would have no use for the mother – regardless of what they had promised. While he had been held in that cage his anger had simmered and boiled but stayed below the surface. The man. The soldier? It had planned and listened and calculated. He had heard his captors talking, and pieced together their existence, their way of life and had begun to understand the differences between their dimension and the other. Could finally sit back and lift the scales from his eyes and recognise his reason for denying it's existence for so long. He was terrified of facing his own demons, and in another dimension, he knew that they would be many.

And so he had filled in the blanks. Teyla and Ronon, held in the cages on either side of him had tried to get him to talk but he had brooded, staying inside himself so that when he was finally ready with a plan to use when they were free, he understood one thing. She was his life and he would fight the entire galaxy to get to her. And Major Lorne had not been wrong. He would die a thousand deaths for her.

He had heard the twin explosions in the doorways of the warehouse and with a glance at Ronon and Teyla had indicated that this would be their chance and acknowledged that Lorne and his teams were coming after them. When the smoke had settled and he had seen Lorne about to use his weapon at close range to shatter the locks, he had looked beyond the Major and seen Gina standing in the middle of the room, and _the man?_ He had exploded. His fear for her life and his child's. This had simply exploded. He had pushed all that emotion into anger and had seen the disappointment shoot fleetingly across her face and had wished desperately that this was not the first emotion he had shown her.

Then suddenly she was gone. Amidst the disipating smoke and the confusion. She had simply gone. And that calm demeanor that he had cloaked himself in shattered. As did the man.

The had regrouped briefly and Lorne had filled him in on what had happened to date and the plan that he already had in action.

"We need to get to that portal. They've taken her there. They want the child – for now she'll not be harmed but we need to get to her."

"We know that Colonel. My men have searched the eastern and western quadrants beyond the gate and there is no signatures there. They are now working through the northern and southern. We'll find the portal." Major Lorne looked at the Colonel and saw the worry etched into his face and carefully pushed away his own. The Colonel had so much more to lose and Lorne's role for now? Back up his Colonel. He hadn't known about the child and now everything made sense and he was able to push his own feelings for Gina aside. There was a child and now all that mattered was getting them safe. He would resolve his feelings for her once and for all and give her the very best of his friendship because if he couldn't have the other, then he would not accept nothing at all. So he would be the very best friend he could be. To the three of them. To their child. He owed them all that much at least.

Lorne's radio clicked and activating it he held up a cautionary hand to the Colonel. "They've found something Colonel. Northern quadrant, less than one click from the gate. The portal. Four men are guarding it but there's no sign of Gina or the ones who captured her. Likely they've already taken her through. What's the plan?"

Lorne was happy to defer to his commanding officer now. He saw the steel in the man's eyes and knew that he would want to come up with his own plan and Lorne was happy to step back and let the man do his job. And he'd do his.

"Sam has a naquita weapon standing by?" He waited for Lorne to nod. "Ok. I want you to send two men back to Atlantis. Sam needs to be fully apprised as to what has gone down. Then they need to bring back the weapon and take it to the portal. We'll need our own team to guard the portal, once we've taken our their own guards. We don't know how many that have here in this city at the moment and assume that what is on the other side, more or less replicates what is on this one. At least, that is what Sam has ascertained. She's the only one who has experience of multi dimensions and she says that each dimension is more or less a mirror of another, just small differences generally. Of course, that is not the rule, so we need to go in with very wide open eyes. Copy that?"

Ronon's voice rumbled out. "So we get out Gina? If the city there is as big as the city here, that could be a problem. Do they have an Atlantis over there? Maybe they went straight to their version of Atlantis? Or to another world. If there dimension mirrors ours, then they could use the stargate and go anywhere?"

"Damn it Ronon – you think I don't know that? Perhaps if it had been the other _me_ who had taken her, then I could try to think like him and work out what he was likely to do. But I know that the other _me_ is dead, or at least missing a long time ago, so I have to go with gut feeling on this one. I think ultimately they will take her back to their Atlantis. At least we have the advantage of going in their with field intel – we know what the damn city looks like and we know the places within Atlantis that she'll likely be held. Let's get to the portal. Lorne? Have your men get that naquita bomb ready. As soon as we bring her back out we're gonna blow their Atlantis to kingdom come. There won't be enough of them to even attempt dimensional travel again. I'll make sure of that."


	72. Chapter 72 Equilibrium

CHAPTER 72 – EQUILIBRIUM

"Sheppard! We need to get moving. Get that bomb back through here."

Ronon's voice barely registered with John. He felt only the hard ground beneath him and the woman in his arms and saw her blue eyes as they gazed at him. Felt love wash over him and through him.

"Colonel Sheppard? Ronon is correct. We cannot stay here. Others will come soon and it will not be safe. Bring Gina to the portal then we can finish what we started. What they started."

It was Teyla's calm voice that finally registered and dragging his eyes from Gina, he helped her stand, keeping his arms firmly around her and anchored to his side. She clutched at his tactical vest and he noted that she no longer wore hers. It had obviously been removed by whoever had captured her. He didn't try and loosen her grip, understood why she needed to hang on the way she did and felt that same possessive need.

He nodded at Teyla and Ronon to let them know that he was good to go and turned his attention back to Lorne, eyes flickering once to the man who for all intents and purposes – looked like Dr Carson Beckett.

"Kill him."

Lorne's eyes opened in surprise and Gina finally found her voice. "No John. He was helping me escape. This Carson is the same as our Carson - please, he didn't do anything wrong."

He framed her face with his hands, aware that Carson was looking at him with understanding in his eyes and this gave him reason to rethink his decision. "Do you know what he did with the children Gina? Are you aware of the experimentation?"

"I know John - it was deplorable, but Carson? He at least made sure that they had someone to come to when it got too much. He was their anchor, and never in agreement with what they did. You have to understand that, and forgive him for his part. Second chances John... we're all entitled to them. You know that as much as anyone."

"Damn it!" He dropped his hands from her face and ran one down his face, feeling the rasp of his facial hair. He grimaced. Well overdue for a shave. His forehead reached down so that it rested against hers gently and he said softly. "What do we do with him Gina? How do we make the distinction? I know that there are many in this dimension who are innocent, but I need to punish those who aren't. Can you understand that?"

"Oh God John... I just want to go home... be with you. I want this over. I want them punished too, but perhaps we can help them, rather than destroy. Please? Give me a chance to discuss something with Sam. Carson?"

She turned to the doctor whose eyes remained sympathetic and calm, in the face of his possible death. "Yes Gina, what do you want to do?"

"Can you go back and talk to the others. Talk to Samantha Carter and your government. Tell them I will help them, we will help them - not in the way they want me to - but another way. We'll work on a way to get their gene, a good way - one that does not necessitate taking my baby."

She heard John's intake of breath and saw the same reaction in the others. John's voice was soft and she knew that the anger had gone. "Why would you do this for them Gina? They tried to take our baby - why help them?"

She leaned her cheek against his chest, secure against him. "Because, John. It is the right thing to do. There are other ways, than violence and force. You think like a soldier..."

"And you think like a woman... a mother... protect rather than destroy."

She saw the flash of something in Major Lorne's eyes and saw that he had reconciled his feelings towards her and her smile that she sent in his direction told him that she understood. He was able to smile back and nod his head slightly, a silent message that he would be her friend for life.

"A mother... maybe it clouds my feelings. I'm also mindful of two IOA babysitters who await our arrival back in Atlantis and who are looking to you for a good result in this mission.." Her voice held a hint of teasing now, incongruous in the wake of all they had gone through, but necessary and he took that as his cue to nod instructions to his team who awaited him.

"Let's go home people. Carson? Take your message back to your people. Tell them you owe Gina here for your lives and if you ever try anything like this again - there will be no mercy another time. I am not quite as forgiving as this woman here, but I can see her point of view and I'd like to try it her way this time. Trust, Carson - seems to be one thing lacking on this side of the portal. Perhaps you all need to take a good hard look at your lives and what exactly is missing from it. I'll wager, it's more than just an ancient gene. But we'll give you that, if we can - and perhaps you'll be able to move on and change some of the things that you want to change."

Carson stood staring after this little group as they moved off toward the portal. The strong airforce Colonel, so similar to his old friend who he had lost and he blinked back tears, wishing that things could have been different. For all of them. And watched as he held tight to a woman who was his world, just as the Gina of this dimension had been the soulmate of his John. Some things were destined to cross dimensions. Some things were just meant to be. He stared curiously at Ronon and Teyla - they did not have counterparts in his dimension and wondered at the circumstances that had led them to become involved with this group. His last thought before he turned to head to the stargate that would take him back to his Atlantis, was of the baby inside Gina - his Carlie. He missed her, felt her absence keenly and wondered if the people who seemed to pull the strings in their dimension, the ascended ancients - would somehow allow her to come back to this dimension if he could make things right.

Sam was waiting for them when they returned and John looked up to the control room to see her looking down at them, face relieved, a small smile playing around her lips. Beside her stood the two IOA men, their somber expressions not readable and John recalled Gina's comments about them watching the fallout from this mission closely. It made sense. A lot had happened in the past month, most of which had serious implications back on earth in their timeline and in a prior timeline and short of pulling the plug on the Atlantis mission, it was likely the president himself was getting some flack on this one. John fought down laughter that threatened to break through. Perhaps the president would grace them with his presence one day in Atlantis, see how the field half lived. See how the other galaxy lived. Easy to make decisions from a comfortable chair in an even more comfortable office, surrounded by people whose only desire was to please you and spin a not so outlandish tale to the American public. His own mission reports could do with the touch of his spin doctors, Gina was honest to the point where perhaps dishonesty would have been more acceptable and it was likely that her mission reports - signed off in his name of course - had brought the wrath of the government down on them.

Ronon, Teyla, Major Lorne and the marines dispersed quickly - food and showers being the order of the day, but not before hearing Sam's stern order that a debrief would commence first thing in the morning. John and Gina simply stood there, in the gate room. Arms wrapped around each other, Gina with her head resting on John's chest - too weary to move. Carson hovered uncertainly in the background. He would normally have stepped in and whisked her away to the infirmary, knew that with the trauma of the past few hours she should really have a check up - but he saw their need to be together and decided that she looked no more the worse for wear than any of the others.

"John. Gina." Sam walked down the stairs, waiting until the room was cleared and the marines who kept the gateroom secured had stood down. "No doubt there is a good reason why the naquita bomb still stands expectantly at the back of the gate room. Hmmm?"

She looked over Gina's head at John, and he shook his slightly. Not really wanting to go into it right now.

"Seems we have a diplomat in the making Sam." He flicked his eyes downward indicating Gina. "Offered them a solution. Round table discussion. Help."

Sam's eyebrows raised expectantly. "Can't wait to read the next episode Colonel. Not really what we agreed on or discussed?"

"FYI Sam - that discussion - was between Lorne and you. I was trapped in a damn cage. Though for the record? I would have gone for the bomb. Seems someone thinks we need to offer them assistance rather than annihilation... said like that, it does make sense. Tomorrow Sam. Will explain it all tomorrow. I think for tonight we're safe - I'm hoping our little friend on the inside will get them to halt retaliation long enough for us to try and come up with a rescue package for them. Tomorrow. After tonight..." He yawned widely, his jaw cracking and saw the smile on Sam's face.

"Seems like one of you is ready for bed and the other already there..."

And looking down at the dark head that rested on his chest, he saw her eyes were closed, lashes resting on pale cheeks. Sound asleep. And life had suddenly never felt so good.


	73. Chapter 73 Aftershock

CHAPTER 73 – AFTERSHOCK

He managed to crack one eye open and was rewarded with the glare of sunlight as it cascaded through his window over his balcony. Another day in paradise. Then promptly shut it again, feeling the light breath of the woman beside him, her face tucked into his neck. Raising his head slightly he tried again – tactical vest off... but combat gear still on... both of them. Wiggling his feet slightly he felt his boots and groaned, realising that they had simply fallen into bed last night, clothes and all. And not even bothered to remove his boots.

Easing himself out from under her he stood in the centre of the room and stretched, groaning as he felt the crinks and creases that had long since settled into his long limbs, slowly begin to ease out. One longing look at the woman on the bed and he considered a shower the better of the two options, and spreading a trail of black combat gear between the bed and the bathroom, he entered the room naked, and turned on the shower – waiting patiently as steam filled the room.

A slight shift in the air had him smiling. The shower door eased open and a small warm body with sleepy blue eyes came up behind him, breasts rubbing seductively along his back, her hand reaching around to grasp his manhood, already pulsing with an excitement that he had no ability whatsoever to control.

"Morning..." Her voice was soft and breathy and he felt her lips ease over his skin, mixing with the warm water as it cascaded over his hair and down his back. He arched back into her, groaning a little at her ministrations and his own hand reached behind him, feeling her legs slightly parted and eagerly awaiting his hand. She pulled him backwards so that she was pressed hard against the shower wall and lifted one leg to wrap up and around him, allowing him easier access and he allowed his fingers to plunge into her moist heat.

She came quickly and gasping as the water ran rivers down her face and sighing, she leaned into him, and he turned so that he was facing her. Lifting both legs up and around his waist he was inside her heat instantly, thrust for thrust and supported them both by placing a hand either side of her head on the wall behind. Not finished yet, he picked her up, used one hand to flick off the shower and striding through the bathroom and into the bedroom, he gently lay down on the bed and began an assault with his tongue, licking up drops of water as he went, until she came again. Boneless, spineless and more alive than she had ever felt.

"Morning.." he echoed now, a satisfied smile on his face and was rewarded with her soft laughter and soft body as it curled around his, finding the perfect fit.

"I can't believe we fell into bed shoes and all..."

"You can't have any memory of going to bed... you were sound asleep against me in the gate room. Had to pick you up and carry you out – much to amusement of Sam and the gate technician. I don't think Sam had ever seen anyone fall asleep standing up before..." John was running a hand idly over her stomach, wondering how their baby was in the aftermath of it all.

"Just so glad to be home.. here. And thank you John – for showing them some leniency and giving me the chance to make this work."

"Ahh sweetheart. I learnt my lesson with the dimensional portal. No more burying my head in the same, no more doubt and distrust. If you have an idea, a plan – I'll listen and support – not find fault and excuses. I had some time to think about things, and we both kept things hidden in our own way... and no more. Agreed?"

Gina pushed herself up on one elbow and looked down at him, then at the hand that rested possessively on her stomach.

"Agreed John. So... while I've got you in this agreeable mood... my little plan may involve me going back to that dimension – there's something there I need to check. " She saw his objection about to voice itself and watched as he attempted, more or less successfully, to squash it down. "Not until after we have reached some sort of agreement with them of course... "

John's eyes sparkled now. "You are a manipulative minx, you know that? You are going to let me in on your little secret or do I have to get it out of you in other ways?" His hand began to explore further afield, and laughing she rolled away from him, presenting him with the view of her perfect backside.

"I saw something in that dimension John, and I didn't think anything of it – not until we were talking with Carson Two at the end – then it started to make me think... and you know what happens to those sorts of ideas? Usually out of left field... "

"Spill sweetheart... you'll not leave this bed until you do..."

"I talked to Carson Two – he asked me about the differences between this dimension and theirs and I asked the same questions... curious I guess as to what sort of person I would have been if I've lived there. Carson Two was the same, more or less. He had a harder streak in him definitely, but I think that had been put there through circumstance, more than anything. My take is this – essentially, the people in each dimension – us – start out the same, personality wise. But circumstance dictates the subtle changes that filter through. And you know the one person I didn't ask about – and didn't see? Rodney. Why? Why would that be?"

"Why so important Gina?" His hand still idly ran over her body and she shivered.

"Ive been trying to ask myself that same thing. Carson Two never mentioned him – and if he was a key player over there, he would have either popped up in person, or in conversation. But nothing."

"So he doesn't exist over there? Or did the same thing that our Rodney did – went back in time, as a result of you coming forward in time. You must have done the same thing in their dimension to even exist in the same timeline as me..."

"That's what I was thinking... except. I remembered something that I had seen. Stupid really, almost inocuous... I was drifting in and out of consciousness as a result of that sedative they had given me and I was watching the men in the room – someone named Gil and Lan. One of them was holding something that registered in my mind at the time, then I forgot..."

"Do I have to threaten you with physical torture... hmmm... finish your story!" John had pushed himself up on one elbow now, fascinated in spite of himself and frustrated at the way she was drawing it out.

"December 7th 1941... does that date ring a bell John?"

John didn't have to give it any thought. All American's knew this date. "Pearl Harbour..."

"So John, 7th December 1961, would be … what?"

"Twentieth anniversary. Where are you going with this?"

"That man Gil – he was turning over and over in his hand, a large comemorative coin. One that I recognised. They were minted especially for the twentieth anniversary of Pearl Harbour. December 1961."

Understanding dawned on John's face. "Oh... "

"Oh? Nothing more to say?"

"Thinking, babe... at least trying to follow your train of thought. You think that he's been back to 1962, or someone has come forward from 1962... perhaps you brought it back? Or myself?"

"Perhaps John, perhaps it is a simple explanation like that. But you know that niggly feeling you get...?"

"Spidey senses?"

She giggled, loving this particular analogy. "Yeah, those ones... anyway. I got 'spidey senses' when I looked at him rolling that coin in his hand. Like... it wasn't us that brought it back."

"Oh..."

"Eloquent this morning Colonel Sheppard?"

"Trying to process. And wanting to believe. Trust – and I do. So we'll take this to Sam and get her take on it. Ok? Among everything else."

"You, my delicious Colonel.. are amazing. Come here... I'm feeling very much awake now... "


	74. Chapter 74 Cause and Effect

CHAPTER 74 CAUSE AND EFFECT

John went with Gina to have a quiet word to Sam about what Gina had remembered. He had learnt the hard way to trust her. Mindful of the fact that the smallest innocuous things that had happened in this last month generally had been of epic proportions once full implications were realised, he had encouraged her to tell Sam as soon as possible. They watched Sam's face as she digested the news, saw the implications spiral around in her head and Gina tossed a quick look at John. The more she thought about it, the more she could see the coin twisting and turning in the man's hand. Winking at her. Daring her to make the connection.

"I will send a message through to Jack. See if he can track down anything, a picture or one of the actual coins. I trust you Gina. You've been the connection all along. If for some reason your mind has interpreted this as being important, then likely it is."

"Honey, I'm home..." Exuding his usual wit, General Jack O'Neill stepped through the stargate 24 hours later, a smile on his face and one hand clutching papers and folders, the second hand holding a small overnight bag. It looked as though the General was intending to stay for a few days, and it was a smiling Sam who came down the stairs from the control room and hugged him. Although no longer directly in his chain of command, they did try to keep their relationship discreet. More or less. But she missed him during the times when they were apart, and lately - those times had been longer and longer.

"That was quick Jack. I take that as a sign you were successful? And looking at the pile of paperwork you hold there, you've given up on your battle with the reports and are effectively passing the buck... hmmm"

"You are so much more succinct than I, Sam. So the short answer - yes! I'm bequeathing these to you."

"Bequeathing Jack? Generally implies that a person is dead..."

"Ok, so wrong word..." He aimed a smile at John Sheppard as he strolled into the gate room, alerted to the General's arrival. The Colonel gave a smile in return, wondering what new information the General had brought through the gate with him.

"Sheppard! That lady of yours is causing all sorts of political fallout back on earth. You have no idea... I'm bouncing back and forward between galaxies faster than a damn ping pong ball and gate lag? It's very real Sheppard, I can assure you!"

"The political fallout is not just being felt on earth General... we're getting our share of it here. It seems we just close one portal so to speak and another one opens. Only this time, we don't know where or when."

"Or when? That's the part that scares me Sheppard. But I suspect we do know the 'when'. Give me time to have a cup of coffee with the lovely Colonel here... the female one... and we'll meet at 01000 hours? Conference room. Sheppard - you'll let Gina and our IOA visitors know?" John nodded at the General and left to get his own cup of coffee and tear Gina away from the infirmary where she and Carson had been comparing notes on Carson one and Carson two.

He walked into the infirmary to find her upset. She was leaning against one of the beds and Carson was standing near her, a worried look on his face.

"Gina? Carson? Mind telling me what's going on?" He went immediately to her, resting a hand along the back of her neck, pulling slightly to tug her back against him.

"She's just remembered something else Colonel. Something she didn't understand as she has not been exposed to them. Tell him lass." He smiled encouragingly at her.

"John. I didn't know, didn't think. The sedative they gave me - I just drifted for a while, not really awake and not really asleep, but sometimes aware. I told you I watched the two men in the room? There was another that came in and spoke to them, only for a short while and he kept looking at me. I found it hard to focus, everything was blurry so I don't want to trust what I saw. But when I told Carson - I wasn't withholding it from you, it just came to mind when we were talking, and when I described the person... or thing... he got upset. John?"

"It's ok sweetheart - we'll deal with it. General O'Neill's here now, we can deal with it. Just tell me what you saw and no one's going to be angry with you. I promise."

"The man had long white hair, and his skin was a funny colour, sort of blue/green with markings, like scars... his eyes John. They were yellow. I had to have imagined it."

"Jesus Gina - wraith! You just described a wraith!" and he saw from Carson's startled expression that he had thought along the same lines. "Wraith? In their Alantis. Oh boy... that opens one big bad ass can of worms. You're sure Gina?"

"No John... damn it... I'm not sure. But I've never seen a wraith, remember? So how can my mind make up something it's never seen? You've told me about them, given me their history and your battle here with them - but I've never seen a picture, a visual - only had a description. Could my mind have created this from a description? Carson?"

"I don't know lass... not my field I'm sorry. Dr Heitmeyer would be of assistance with that one. Hypnosis Colonel? To try and bring out whether it is a real memory or an imagined one?"

John had placed his hands lightly on her shoulders, careful not to let her think there was any anger in the movement. "Gina, please love.. think carefully. Did they appear to be on friendly terms?"

"He was only in the room for a short time. Bosom buddies maybe not... but not enemies either. And the way he looked at me. I think that is what stuck in my mind the most."

"Ahh hell Carson. This meeting in... oh, 30 minutes... is going to be fun. Lot's of fun. A wraith worshipping alternate dimension. Just keeps getting better and better. That coffee I need? Better get a double shot."

And it was after his double shot of coffee that John now faced the people in the conference room and shared what Gina had just told himself and Carson. The General simply sank his head into his hands and looked despondently down the table at Gina. "So... Gina. I love you like a... well, whatever we are relative wise.."

"Ahh... that would be nothing General... nearly, if I'd married Terrence." Gina gently interupted him.

"Ok, well... you get the picture. Anyway, as I was saying? You seem to be the bearer of bad news on a regular basis. Not your fault I'm sure, but I can't help feeling that Colonel Sheppard here had the right idea the first time. Bury his head in the sand and hope to hell it all goes away. But, I guess that's not gonna happen... Sam?"

"Yes Jack."

"Whatcha wanna do?"

He looked like a small boy whose toys had been stolen by the schoolyard bully, and John had to fight back a smile. Even in light of the seriousness that her news had brought, General O'Neill, well... he just knew how to diffuse a situation. And John was pretty sure he did it deliberately. The man had seen how nervous Gina was when she walked in and had carefully watched the expression on her face as John had told the story. So, he was a good guy. Trying to put her at ease and let her know at the start that no one would be looking to her for blame of any sort.

"You're not gonna pull rank on this one Jack?"

"Advisory role Sam... but, I do have something for you all. Especially you Gina." He opened the top button of his shirt pocket and pulled out something shiny and round. "This was what you saw Gina?"

Fascinated, Gina reached towards him and took the commemorative coin, turning it over and over in her hands the way she had seen the man in the other dimension do. "This is it General - where did you find it?"

"Close to home.. had it on my desk at the SGC. When Sam mentioned it, immediately alarm bells started ringing. We came to Hawaii to visit Terrence in December 1961, when he was in jail - but he refused to see us. We stayed in Hawaii for a week and it coincided with the 20th anniversary - whole island had a memorial service more or less. My father bought me one of these. I kept it with me always... sort of one of my last good memories...I had it on me when he was killed the following year. In 1962."

John's eyes were watching Gina as she transerred the coin back and forward and he had to drag his gaze away from her movements to look at the General. "Meaning what Sir? Why did this man have that particular coin. A coin that was minted in December 1961 and is now held on your desk in the SGC in 2012? Who was that man? Did he simply have the coin for the same reasons as you do? A souviner from that time? Or are there more sinister reasons, say ... he or someone from there, has been back to 1962. Gina - what do we know about them - what are their differences, that you could see?"

Gina continued her movement with the coin, as though the simple activity calmed her. "Absence of the ancient gene - this would mean that they would have no help, no interference with ascended beings and ancient busybodies."

"No, that is true - but how do they operate the equipment in their Atlantis? With no ancient gene? We know that the equipment has to be initially activated by someone with the gene, and once activated it can be used by anyone. So initially, someone from their dimension had to activate the equipment - therefore had to have the gene. Who?"

"General O'Neill..." It was Gina who spoke.

"Me...?" The General looked at her curiously. "What led you to that conclusion?"

"You're the only one who would have been strong enough to activate it.. and it had to have been someone that came from another time line." Gina could not have told them how she knew this. How she had come to any of the conclusions that she had managed to reach without appearing to actually connect the dots. She had felt a warmth inside her earlier, a tingling – familiar and had simply thought the baby was beginning to make it's presence felt. Perhaps Callandra or her father were attempting to guide her thoughts in the right direction.

"But they have no one left with the gene?" John threw his question into the mix, struggling to follow the reasoning.

Gina knew she would have to attempt to answer as best as she could. "No one left now... no... but how long ago was the gene bred out? Carson Two mentioned that it had been absent in their lineage for years, so in order to activate the city, assuming it was activated during the same time frame as your Atlantis was, someone from their past, who still had the gene - would have to come through."

"Me?" The general was fascinated. "If you're thinking that 1962 is still the magic number, and I can see by the slightly insane shine to your eyes that it is - then I was only 10 years old... I was precocious, or so they tell me - but 10? Not a lot I could have done."

"You would have only needed to enter the city... the city would have recognised the presence of the gene immediately, as it did here when the people from earth arrived." It was Teyla who spoke now. "The ancient gene in you is strong. I think perhaps, you were the last carrier of the gene in their dimension."

Gina felt that warmth swirl inside her again and a small smile came unbidden to her face. Not Callandra – her father. She felt his presence now and it calmed her, gave her the courage she had been digging deep to find and felt John's keen gaze on her and the brush of his hand on her thigh in support.

She took a breath. "When they brought you forward in time, it was done incorrectly and you died in your future and this effectively killed out the last of the gene. If they had successfully gotten you back to your timeline, then you would likely had children and continued the gene."

"Ok, so that goes with all the children I have successfully fathered in this dimension." His reply was ironic. "And if I no longer exist in that dimension... what is the point in this whole conversation?"

Sam's eyes started to sharpened as the picture became clearer for her. "The coin Jack. It all comes back to the coin. Think with your 10 year old self. If someone appeared from the future to take you back, kidnap you really - would you take the coin? If it was a talisman of sorts, something you held dear?"

"Would I take the coin? How the hell do I know? It's been a long time since I was ten years old... memories are a little vague that long ago. More to the point - who took me back.?"

"Find that answer and the picture will be complete. But whoever it was - it went wrong, you died, which means you also died in the future. No longer existed." Sam had steepled her hands and now rested her chin on them, eyes flicking around the room, taking in their reactions to what was being pieced together.

Ronon pushed away from the table, silent up until now. "This is the thing you should be worrying about. Wraith. In the other Atlantis. You should be thinking about this little alliance you seem to think is happening over there - right now! Not about a damn coin."

Ronon's face and voice registered anger and he paced around the room, making eye contact with anyone that dared, with his usual hooded expression. "Wraith. If there are wraith worshippers, then this plan that Gina wants to come up with to help them get their ancient gene back - should be stopped. Who really wants the gene? The people you met? Or the wraith? Who is working for who? Or are the wraith looking for a way to your world - earth. If they haven't already found it. That is the real issue here - not a coin!"

Mostly people just stared at him. It was rare that he spoke so much at once. He was a man of action and few words. When his weapon sufficed, that was his voice. Teyla rose and placed a hand on his arm and looked also at the earth people gathered around, and John got a sinking feeling in his stomach. He suspected an 'us against them' speech was about to happen. She stood now with her team mate - the wraith their first enemy and could not understand why this news alone did not have the earth people immediately planning an offensive.

"Ronon is right. You are looking at a coin. You should be looking at the enemy and planning how to destroy them. You have allowed yourselves to be led beyond what is important. History, ripples, time... you cannot change what has been done, unless you go back. You have to deal with the here and now. And that means destroying the wraith that inhabit the other Atlantis and finding a way to ensure that such an alliance can never happen again. Destroy the weapon they have that creates the holes that allow people from one dimension to cross to another. Shut the portals. Those are the solutions. There can be no other."

Gina had pushed to her feet, ignoring a warning glance from Sam and John. "Teyla, I would not have thought you would be this simplistic and this unsympathetic. The reason these people are in the situation they are in, is because they lack the gene to complete what needs to be done. Running their city efficiently amongst other we address this issue, then we can address other issues. Such as your wraith."

John sat unmoving at the table, his face now dark and brooding. "You've just given everyone the answer Gina."

All eyes turned to him now.

"We need to go back to 1962 - again. Make sure Jack in both dimensions is protected. The coin? It was a sign, the only way that Callandra of that dimension could step in and help. A clue. She left you a clue Gina. She left you the coin. 1962. You need to go back - before your accident, just before young Jack gets to Hawaii in October of that year. Protect him. In this dimension. Ripples...? More like tidal waves. Fix it in this dimension, in the past, and it will flow through to the other dimension."

Gina had tears in her eyes now and she struggled with what he had just asked her to do. "Protect him how John? I don't know what to do!"

Jack O'Neill spread out the papers that he had piled around him, and heaved a sigh. "I should have brought these out at the beginning. Would have saved all the damn argument..."

He spread out a series of newsclipping, typewritten reports and polaroid photos, and John's sinking feeling became a rock lodged in his stomach. The General was about to throw the proverbial crap at the fan and they had better duck now. Because it was going to splatter big time.

Gina reached out with a shaking hand as one photo caught her eye immediately. It was of a woman, a man and a little girl. Playing in a park. The woman was laughing and pushing the little girl on a swing and Gina could see by the trees in the background that they were somewhere in Hawaii – at least that is what it looked like to her. The man rested against the supports of the swing, smiling as he watched the woman push the child. She felt John lean over her shoulder to look at the photo and heard his sharp intake of breath.

The woman in the photo was her and the girl was Carlie. The man who stood near watching with love in his eyes, was John Sheppard.

"Jesus..." John breathed the word and reached out a hand to take the picture from Gina and turn it over. Written in neat writing on the back was the date. December 1962.

Gina's eyes flew to John's. "I wasn't there – I died. In October 1962. This is the Carlie we sent back – how can I be with her? How can you be there? You left for earth again in July 1962." She started to breathe fast and John was quick to toss the photo down and pick up her hand, tucking it against his body to try and calm her.

"Is that me John? Or the other Gina? From the other dimension. And you? The other John? Did she go back to find her daughter? She was sent back to be with Terrence, her father – he had met another woman and Carlie was to be a part of their family."

That warmth again as thoughts began to swirl in her head and she shut her eyes, suddenly dizzy. Jack had gotten up from the table and moved quickly around behind her, giving John a hard look. Gina put her hands out to stop Jack from coming any closer and to keep a small distance between John and herself. To give her a moment to put her thoughts into order.

"We went back John – you and I. To make sure that Carlie was the union of the two of us, not Terrence. Carlie holds the gene. Just as this baby holds the gene. They went back to change it. So that Jack didn't die, didn't have to be the one to come through to activate the city. That Gina and that John? They chose to stay, rather than go back They never knew that it was actually Carlie who activated the city – they thought it was Jack who had done it. No one in that dimension knew that Carlie did carry the gene – that it had all been changed!"

"God Gina – do you have any idea what you are saying?" Sam's face was pale.

"Yes Sam – John and I from that dimension are not dead – we are in 1962. I never left. She and John crossed over and took my place, waiting for Carlie to arrive. Knew that she would arrive. And by coming, it changed who the father was. John became the father. I never spent that night with Terrence. God, tidal waves... it's staggering. How could Callandra not know this?"

"I think she did Gina. I think she knew, and chose not to tell you."


	75. Chapter 75 The Final Pieces

CHAPTER 75 – THE FINAL PIECES

John saw immediately they her agitation needed attention, and fast. He didn't look at the others, simply supported her gently and led her from the room, out into the hallway. He rested his back against the wall and pulled her into his arms – tightly. And just held her. Feeling her shuddering breaths as she fought to get her emotions and her feelings under control.

"We'll work it out Gina. It's not all on you sweetheart. We'll find a solution."

She didn't answer him, but he felt her hands clutch tightly at his shirt and felt the tremors running through her body._ Cause and effect _ thought John. _It all comes down to Gina and I – it was always about us. What I changed by going back – the snowball effect – in this dimension, yes – but much more so in the other dimension. There? The ripples are staggering – for some reason stronger because they have crossed dimensions._

_The timeline is different. Gina and I had Carlie six years ago in that dimension – it is only happening now. How is that significant. The date? 2006. Why then? We have been gone from the other Atlantis for two years, by Carson Two's admission. 2010. Another signifance? At the point that I went back in time – Carlie was the daughter of Gina and Terrence. Rodney did not exist in that dimension. Jack had been killed attempting to cross the time portal. What changed? _

He pulled her away from him slightly.

"John – we need to go back to 1962 – you and I. Fix it."

"Fix what Gina? Just what the hell do we need to fix? I don't know anymore... I don't want to know. I just want to have a normal life... here, with you and our baby. I don't want to know about dimensions and time travel and things that can hurt you..."

Tears ran down her cheeks and she tried to pull away from him. He held on, but she found a strength that had her running down the hall and away from him. John swore and set off after her, worried she would hurt herself and by the time Jack and Sam had rushed out of the conference room, alerted to their raised voices, they were both gone and it was Jack who felt an immediate sinking in his stomach. He knew where she had gone. And he knew that John would follow her to the ends of the earth. Their earth. 1962.

He caught up with her in the control room where she had burst in on a surprised gate technician. John was right behind her and the surprised look moved to encompass him as well. The technician knew that if there had been an emergency of some sort, he would have been contacted by intercom or radio, but the sight of this slightly crazed woman rushing into the control room had him wishing that he had a weapon handy.

John attempted to regain control of the situation. "Gina.. calm down. We can't go off half cocked here. We need a plan, a way to do this. So – we go back to 1962? Just what the hell are we supposed to do there?"

The gate technician's eyes widened further as General O'Neill and Colonel Carter stepped into the room. The General had the look on his face that said ' be nice to pregnant ladies' and his hands were out slightly in a 'I'm not trying to scare you' gesture and the technician had the disturbing and somewhat inappropriate thought that he had been caught in a rerun of "Days of Our Lives."

"Gina." The General spoke now. He sensed that Sheppard had lost control of the situation, but didn't know that he would have any more success than his younger Colonel. "I know what you want to do... believe me, if I was in your shoes, that is exactly what I would do."

Gina whirled around and he stepped back at the fury and determination he saw in those brilliant blue eyes and felt more than just a moment's concern for the baby she carried.

"How can you know what I would do... Jack!" She deliberately chose not to given him his formal address and he cringed a little. He knew that with her being around military all her life, she would have used his less formal address in this situation not out of friendship, but as a blatant sign of disrespect. That meant she was good and angry. He almost turned around and walked away, intent on leaving Sheppard to deal with her, but he could see by the younger man's eyes that he was almost at the end of his ability to cope. So step in he would. At this own detriment.

"You're going to go back and help them return to their own dimension, their own timeline. You're going to let them have the life they should have had. You've fixed everything else. You came here, allowing Rodney to go there. You and Sheppard are together, the genetic mix for your child is stable and as it's meant to be. You're going to give me back my life in that dimension. Damn it Gina. You're one woman. It's not all on your head – let nature take it's course now, or even better? Let the damn ancients step in and fix up this crap. It doesn't need to be you!"

Jack saw John's shoulder's slump in resignation and saw the relieved look the younger man shot his way. Nodding once to acknowledge the look, Jack stepped up to Gina and gently placed his hands on her shoulders. "You need to stay here and take care of yourself and your baby. That is your legacy for now – let the rest sort itself out."

"Can't do that Jack... I need one last shot to make it right, or I'll never be able to live with myself. Give me once last shot... please..." Her blue eyes, startling in their intensity – looked up at him and he was reminded so much of Sam that he had to close his own eyes momentarily to block out the message he saw in them. _Damn it Jack. Let her go. She's a part of all of us here, in some way, shape or form. Somehow there is a tiny part of her in all of us. Let Sheppard take her, then if things go south, yeah, you'll lose your Colonel, but at least they'll be together. Somewhere. Somewhen. Let her go alone? He'll never forgive you._

Gina watched the play of emotions across the General's face and saw the moment that he made his decision and she breathed a sigh of relief. He was going to let her go. Let her finish this once and for all. She would have help. Callandra and Nate. They wouldn't leave her to flounder alone, and she would have the love of her life at her side. Protecting her, as he always did – as he always would. She placed a hand over her stomach, now gently rounded – and rubbed it gently. John was behind her in a heartbeat, his own hand resting on top of hers and he simply buried his face into her hair. He had no words.

They dressed simply, but with additional layers of warmth to combat the cold on the planet that held the ancient portal. One last time. No tactical vests, no weapons. Weapons did not make the trip through the time portal – they simply were not there when you arrived. As they waited by the stargate with the small group that would accompany them as far as the portal, Gina shivered and John – who had never been more than a hairsbreath from her side, placed his arm around her and pulled her against him.

Major Lorne was coming with them, as were Ronon and Teyla. His loyal team and he knew by their faces that they simply did not understand what Gina was hell bent on doing. Not sure that he did either, but it was do or die – and he had a life to live here when he got back, so he'd 'do' now, in order to protect that life.

It was Gina that flicked a casual wave up at the control room as the dialling process began and the General was quick to return it. He spoke over the intercom. "Godspeed you two. Try not to cause any... trouble – while you are there. If you get my drift?"

His comment got the desired reaction, a small smile from Gina and then they were gone and the gate silent and still. Jack's eyes held Sam's and he shrugged his shoulders. It was out of his hands now.

The planet was as cold as he remembered it and John had hoped fervently that he would never have to come back here. He gripped Gina's hand on the walk to the portal, wondering if it would even still be there and if it was, would it even open for him. Ronon was silent, but once in a while John caught the intense look he sent his way. No, his old friend didn't understand why he did this. Too many shades of gray for the big Satedan. Teyla accepted, as was her way – but didn't really understand either and Lorne? He had at least gotten over his crush on Gina, and seemed content to offer friendship now, and it was this friendship that had John gripping his hand tightly in a firm handshake as the portal did indeed reopen for them.

No more words, just a smile, then he took Gina's had and allowed the purple glow to suck him in, feeling just like a little boy about to get dunked by a big wave, he subconsciously held his breath...


	76. Chapter 76 1962

CHAPTER 76 – 1962

He rolled over and spat out a mouthful of sand. Felt the burning Hawaiian sun beating down on his back and smiled. The woman beside him groaned and he was instantly aware and rolling over to make sure she was all right. Home. Hawaii. 1962. He knew this would be difficult for her.

"John?"

"I'm here sweetheart. We're here... we made it back. 1962."

She pushed herself to her knees and he pulled her back against him, needing just to sit for a while and get his own equilibrium back. From one time line to another. One dimension to another. He wondered briefly what sort of crap must be going on inside their bodies. All that matter disintegrating and reintegrating, but then guessed it was no likely more damaging than constant gate travel and no one had ascertained yet, whether that would have long term effects on a body.

"I don't think that will ever get easier John..." She hugged her knees now looking pale, then suddenly leaned sideways and retched. He held her hair back and rubbed her neck until he felt the spasms stop, then simply held her.

"Doesn't help that you're three months pregnant Gina – and another thing? Carlie in there, might be reacting to the Carlie who is already here. They're effectively sharing the same time line again. And the same dimension. I still think there are repercussions when that occurs."

"How do we find them John? Ourselves? Go and see Callandra?..."

"Or she will come to you..." They heard her voice and pulling her head up to finally face the bright Hawaiian sun, Gina spotted Callandra standing just a few feet away from them, Nate beside her. Tears rolled down Gina's eyes when she saw him and pushing herself up from the sand she ran and threw herself into his arms, needing the comfort of a father.

"Daddy..."

"Shhh baby... you've done well – you got through and I am so damn proud of you." His hand reached down and touched her stomach. "I wish I could be there when Carlie is born – she has abilities you will not yet understand, that is why it was so important for the other dimension to get their hands on her."

"Daddy? It's changed now though... Carlie in their dimension is John's child now, not Terrence's. She has the same gene as this Carlie, the same abilities?"

"Yes sweetheart – that's why they chose to stay here rather than take her back. They knew if she went back then she would likely be used for experimentation, once it was established she had the gene. Her life was safer here."

"You knew – all along, didn't you? And kept the information from us. So that I wouldn't come back and send them back to their own dimension."

Gina felt John move in behind her and Nate released her then, pushing her back towards John, into the arms of the man who had travelled a timeline with her and crossed a dimension to rescue her.

"We selfishly thought to keep them here – I wanted _her_ here – both Gina and Carlie... as a replacement for you and your Carlie. I was wrong. My reasons were wrong as were Callandra's. We couldn't stand it when you left so this was how we chose to fill the hole. We thought it ensured their safety."

"But you need to fix it Daddy. In their dimension, Jack is dead and there are wraith making liason's that cannot be allowed to happen. All because the gene has been bred out. Let them go back – the gene is safe, and Jack didn't have to die. By doing it your way, you lost the gene pool that both John and Jack could have provided – in your arrogant and near sightedness you totally missed the full picture. With those two, and Carlie – you have a perfect gene pool – the strongest and the best. But you sacrificed it so that you could keep us close – here, with you. That was wrong."

Callandra glanced at Nate, then back at Gina. "You are right Gina – it was wrong. They were happy here... but we couldn't bring outselves to send them back."

"So you arranged for Jack to get the pictures... knowing that once he saw them – once we saw them – I would be the one to fix it. That I couldn't allow it to happen."

"Hey, hey... so a 2012 reunion – guys!" John's head swung around at the familiar voice and a smile immediately lit his face.

"Rodney! Damn..." He moved forward quickly to give the man a hard hug and stepping back, looked him up and down. "Complete with Hawaiian shirt... not so much a good look on you..."

Rodney laughed. "Eloquent as always I see, Sheppard. But, it's good to see you – tell me, what have I missed in Atlantis? Any earth shattering discoveries since I've been saving the world here on earth?"

John rolled his eyes. "Seems earth and 1962 haven't changed your arrogance in any way... but we have been following your successes, courtesy of two meddling ancients... so we know what's in store for the space programme, more or less."

"All in place Colonel... notes carefully written, placed in the right hands – suggestions made to the right people – discreetly of course. All set in motion and ready to go – remotely, you might say.. All I need to do is push the buttons."

Gina was looking at Rodney with curiosity. "Remotely? You're coming back... aren't you? How? What happened to the 'balance' thing..."

Rodney burst out laughing at John's stunned look. "Oh look at that! Colonel John Sheppard too stunned to speak.. where's that damned camera."

John was looking in shock from Rodney to Gina. "Aaah crap... I am so out of my league here. Will someone tell me just what the hell is going on? We came here to send back a dimensional equivalent of myself, Gina and Carlie. We find Rodney acting as though he's spent far too long in the Hawaiian sun telling us he's coming back. Just what the hell is going on?" His shock had turned quickly to anger and it was Gina who stepped towards him and wrapped her arms around him.

"The coin John. From 1961. The commemorative coin. Remember? I thought it was important, but maybe something to do with Jack. Not Jack. Rodney! There's only one of you, in both dimensions. For some reason – only one. So you can cross and live within each dimension with no repercussions. We never needed the balance at all. We only needed Rodney to come back and fix the space programme, get it on track. John?"

"Oh baby, I'm six steps behind you on this... I'm sorry. I'm still flicking sand off my face from the trip here. Portal lag... or something... give me a moment, hell – give me a few hours! I need to think, ok..."

He was not joking and she saw that indeed he just need time by himself, to process. She touched his face gently.

"Go take a board John... the waves are looking particularly good at the moment, don't you think?"

And he looked into her beautiful eyes and saw that she understood and bending down, he kissed her – hard enough so that she rose up onto her toes and wrapped her arms around his neck, pushing her body against his – feeling his reaction immediately.

Into her ear he growled. "I'm going to make love to you on the beach tonight, under the moon – in 1962. Just like we did in the beginning. No crap, no dimensions, no problems. Just us."

"It's a deal – now go... grab a few waves, get your clarity. I'm going to spend some time with my family here, and we'll make it right. Each in our own way."

And he did just that. Her cottage was where it was just when he had last been there and that board? Still standing back in the shed, waxed and ready to go. He ran a hand over it softly, pondering all that had happened since the last time he held it in his hands, felt the texture of the wax and inhaled the residual smell of sea and salt. And thought briefly, just briefly... of simply staying here. Not going back, not dealing with anything more complicated than being worried about the tides and whether a good swell was going to sweep down upon them. Shaking his head at the idea that he was even entertaining such a thought, he let out a war woop and ran for the ocean, simply throwing himself into the wave coming up and shaking the salt and water out of his eyes. A simple task to bring about a simple solution. Stroking the arms, powerful and strong through the water, cutting a path through the warm Pacific swells. Turning, head facing the empty beach, golden sand, waving trees and sun. Swells beneath his board, rising – falling and he let the motion take him. Beyond this place, beyond this world, beyond this time. Home. Hawaii. 1962.

The repetition soothed him. Rising to a sturdy crouch on the board, feeling the strength of the wave beneath him, the power of a ancient tide that sought simply to carry this wave into shore, the conclusion of a journey that had taken a lifetime to complete. Feeling the power slowly seep out of the wave until it lay lost and without direction beneath the conqueror who had swept it into shore. The conqueror – a lone man on a board who found clarity out there on those waves.

Exhausted he dragged himself back into shore, and simply collapsed on the wet sand, his board lying beside him . He looked up at the blue sky without end and felt the sting of the island sun and it was Rodney's face who blocked out some of the sun's rays, staring down at him with concern and not just a little curiousity.

"So Sheppard. Worked off some of those demons yet? You always did need to take to the physical to sort your crap out..."

"Aaah Rodney. I missed you old buddy. Missed your wit, your smart mouth and your serious lack of respect for the word Colonel on my uniform. No one else does it like you..." He chuckled now, pulling himself up to a sitting position and looking sideways at Rodney as he sat down beside him.

"So Rodney... you wanna come home? Or is there something more I don't know about. Say... 1962 has had enough of you and the ancients are actually sending you back?"

"Funny... Sheppard. A barrel of laughs... No. They're not sending me back. I never intended to stay. Once I got here I realised that I could cross between two dimensions. Remember my notes John? I had been playing around with the dimensional stuff before I left... I had figured it out – that there was only one 'me' between here and there... so I could go back and forward."

"Are you responsible for 'us' coming over here – to this dimension?"

"Pretty much. I can only cross in this time line – 1962 here – 1962 there. So I had to sort it out from their past. I knew the gene was going to be an issue..."

"You sent 10 year old Jack there... 1962. That damn coin. It was _you!_ Do you have any idea what you did?"

Rodney looked sheepish. "Yeah, I know Sheppard. I sort of screwed up."

"Sort of? Damn it Rodney! There is no 'sort of'' about it! It was a right royal screw up. Jack died when you tried to send him back to his own timeline. Their gene bred out. The wraith formed an alliance with Atlantis." John had stood up now and looked down angrily at Rodney, remembering exactly why the scientist managed to get him so pissed off most of the time.

"I fixed it Sheppard! When I realised what had happened, I crossed over and left a note. Telling them that at a certain time their daughter would be sent back to 1962 in this dimension and if they went after her, it would change who the father was... and ensure Carlie had the gene. That much worked. They came. John and Gina – from their dimension and they were reunited with Carlie whom you sent here."

"Then why the hell are they still here? They have to take her back, in order for the gene to be reinstated in their dimension..." John impatiently kicked at the sand and he sharpened his gaze when he saw Gina walking up the beach towards them. He knew that she had deliberately stayed away to give Rodney and him some time together. It was Gina who answered the question, but not before she wrapped her arms around his naked torso and rubbed her face along his chest.

"That's not on Rodney, John. Nate told you that. He's wrongfully kept them from leaving... he wanted them to replace me and the child I carry. He knows it's wrong, he wants to make it right. We'll all here together now, and between us, we can make it right and make sure there are no more repercussions. Then we can all go home.

John wrapped his own arms around her and held her close. "Do we meet them? I don't know if I want to see another version of myself... it would be too... weird."

"No John, we cannot meet them for that very reason. We need to let Daddy deal with it from here. Our being here has opened the dimensional and time portal – so he is going to send them through tonight before anything else can happen. Then John, I promise. It's over, all over. Just us now, but tonight? Dad, my brother and Callandra – they want us to join them for a family dinner. A nice normal family dinner..."

She began to giggle... and John too saw the funny side. Normal? Hell, what about any of this had been normal? What about any of his life had been normal for the past five years?

_I stand here now on a beach in Hawaii in 1962, fifty years in the past, with a woman from this time who is pregnant to me in my time. She carries our child, of my time and carrying a gene of an ancient so strong that her purpose in the Pegasus galaxy has not been shown to us yet. We are about to have dinner with two ascended beings, prisms of light and energy that technically do not exist anymore in material form. Oh, and there's Rodney. Scientist extraordinaire... also from 2012 and has just managed to save an entire space programme. Did I miss anything out? Oh yeah, we've just saved the lives of Jack O'Neill and sent three people back to another dimension, one of whom was myself, the other two – my wife to be and my daughter._

_Wife to be?_

_Yeah, why not. Here, in Hawaii – in 1962. _

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_

_**That is the end people – more or less...but... if you read The Soldier or the Man?, my newest series, you will find that it follows Evan Lorne and a young Captain whom he becomes involved in. It is set four months from this story, and guess what? That damn portal rears it's ugly head again... as does a friendship between Evan's new lady love and Gina... oh... and John Sheppard discovers a little skeleton in his family closet... hooked yet? Chapter one awaits...but bear in mind, it IS Major Lorne's story as I felt he was stiffed a little in the romance department in this story.**_

_**Hope you all enjoyed this – I had fun writing it, planning the infernal weaving of a complex plot and trying to work out how best to surprise you all!**_


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